3 million dollars USD vs Pandas

[Polish Theocracy of Joakim]

No


If it was wasps, then hell yeah.

But pandas? no

[Khasinkonia]

The panda is already well on its way to extinction. I think I'll take the 3 million dollars instead of prolonging the inevitable, thank you very much. The world will get over it eventually.

[Sovaal]

No


If it was wasps, then hell yeah.

But pandas? no

Wasps would be even worse.

[Setgavarius]

Charismatic megafauna like pandas are, generally speaking, a huge waste of time and money. Pandas serve as nothing more than the endearing face of environmental organizations who frankly spend 90% of donations on protecting the way more ecologically important white-tailed sea cucumber. I'll take the $3 million, thank you very much, and donate the lot of it to human charities.

And besides, if all pandas died, wouldn't that make people quite a bit more ecologically conscious than they are now?

So would the extinction of all other mammals but that ain't worth it.

[Longweather]

It's not even a choice. Give me my $3 million. I could use that to pay of my student loans and generally help my finances. As an eco-warrior, it would be an honor to wipe personally wipe out all of the pandas. We're not just talking about the giant pandas (the lazy black and white, poor excuses for bears), the OP would also include red pandas, panda cows, panda corydoras (a catfish), panda moor (a goldfish), the panda plants (an entire genus), and
appias panda (a butterfly). This is because the OP mentions all pandas and does not limit it to the most commonly thought of ursine.

My sole regret would be not having the chance to use my money to buy a giant panda burger.

I'll pick pandas. Some things cannot be bought for money.

Some things can't be bought for money.

A species that is literally too lazy to fuck is not one of them. I'd sell Pandas out for a Klondike bar.

I feel the same way about the giant panda.

[Nouveau Yathrib]

Charismatic megafauna like pandas are, generally speaking, a huge waste of time and money. Pandas serve as nothing more than the endearing face of environmental organizations who frankly spend 90% of donations on protecting the way more ecologically important white-tailed sea cucumber. I'll take the $3 million, thank you very much, and donate the lot of it to human charities.

And besides, if all pandas died, wouldn't that make people quite a bit more ecologically conscious than they are now?

I doubt an angry mob armed with bamboo spears and machetes would be capable of reflecting on their broader lifestyle choices while on a manhunt for the asshole who killed off the pandas for a measly 3 million dollars. Humans fundamentally aren't rational animals and no amount of sadistic pedagogy will change that.

[Libertypendence Park]

No


If it was wasps, then hell yeah.

But pandas? no

That's the problem with cute things: everyone thinks they're important, while the things that actually keep the planet going are ignored. Without wasps, food chains collapse and people die. Without pandas... The, uh... You know, bad things happen.

[The Two Jerseys]

So guys I just finished shooting all the Pandas. There are warrants for me in China, the US and with Interpol so I really need that 3 million to fight extradition from my current location. Please transfer to my account, and ignore any bounties from Green peace or PETA.

Did you at least save some panda steaks? Also, thanks for single handedly putting Panda Express out of buisness.

Panda Express is no match for Nitro Express.

[Tuthina]

Screw panda. If I can get away with it, I am willing to even do it for free.

[Infected Mushroom]

Screw panda. If I can get away with it, I am willing to even do it for free.

you don't like pandas?

why not?

[Infected Mushroom]

Did you at least save some panda steaks? Also, thanks for single handedly putting Panda Express out of buisness.

Panda Express is no match for Nitro Express.

I tried Panda Express. It tastes... SOOOO bad...

[Risottia]

For pandas, 3 M$ are way insufficient. Make it 300 M€ and we can start talking about it.

Alternatively, for a meager 3 M€ (or the equivalent in £ or ChF) on a certain encrypted account based in a certain Liechtenstein bank and owned by a certain Luxembourg company, with whom I have no relationship whatsoever of course, I could offer you the extinction not of a single species comprising some hundreds of individuals, but of THREE, I say THREE WHOLE animal genera: Aedes, Anopheles and Culex, each of them comprising BILLIONS AND BILLIONS of individuals. It's BARGAIN!

[Risottia]

Screw panda. If I can get away with it, I am willing to even do it for free.

you don't like pandas?

why not?

They taste like bamboo, and skinning and gutting them is one hell of a mess.

[San Marlindo]

Yes. Because then even after taxes I could use the $3 mil to make up for the horrific damage I've caused by using it to finance my own personal career in wildlife protection (which is, for the most, an incredibly thankless, unprofitable and underpaid profession in most of the world anyway). I'd be making up for it like I said, and that job would now be worth my while. The money will go towards funding my initiative to save the black rhino in Africa, which I like better than panda bears anyway.

[Willania Imperium]

No can do. Money can come and go, but animals can never come back.

[The Lone Alliance]

And the catch is that once everyone realizes you're the one who killed off the Panda you'll have the government of China literally gunning for you. 3 million isn't worth having China trying to kill you.

[Great Nepal]

Yes, please. I'll be 3 million dollar richer and wildlife funding might go towards animal that actually needs the protection rather than the cute, cuddly ones, I mean probably not since we'll just find another cute animal to fund but still.

No can do. Money can come and go, but animals can never come back.

An animal that needs to be coaxed into fucking isn't really an animal worth 3 million.

[Vassenor]

And the catch is that once everyone realizes you're the one who killed off the Panda you'll have the government of China literally gunning for you. 3 million isn't worth having China trying to kill you.

With these sorts of threads you're not allowed to mention things like that. They always take place in some magic pocket universe where doing the thing to get the money carries no consequences whatsoever because otherwise people might not go for it.

[Willania Imperium]

Yes, please. I'll be 3 million dollar richer and wildlife funding might go towards animal that actually needs the protection rather than the cute, cuddly ones, I mean probably not since we'll just find another cute animal to fund but still.

No can do. Money can come and go, but animals can never come back.

An animal that needs to be coaxed into fucking isn't really an animal worth 3 million.

Well, aren't you a man of wealth? I suppose you're the type of person that enjoys seeing cats die because they are "too cute?"

[San Marlindo]

And the catch is that once everyone realizes you're the one who killed off the Panda you'll have the government of China literally gunning for you. 3 million isn't worth having China trying to kill you.

With these sorts of threads you're not allowed to mention things like that. They always take place in some magic pocket universe where doing the thing to get the money carries no consequences whatsoever because otherwise people might not go for it.

I'd risk a hit out on me by the CPC of the PRC for three million easy.

[Zanera]

I will just use the money to start a program to resurrect dead species that were driven to extinction by the human race. I will have to show early success so the government can fund me further, so we can resurrect Cthulu and crusade against all the heathen races.

[The Blaatschapen]

No.

The tax office would be suspicious. Also, I prefer Euro. A currency that I can actually spend

[The Blaatschapen]

you don't like pandas?

why not?

They taste like bamboo, and skinning and gutting them is one hell of a mess.

Also, they're dangerous. A panda eats, shoots and leaves.

[Alvecia]

Nah. I don't need 3 mil, and pandas are adorable.

[Kizja]

Clearly, the pandas.

A way I like to think about these sorts of issues is: If everyone faced with this choice made the same decision as you, what would you decide? It's a generally good solution to prisoner's dilema/tragedy of the commons type questions.

Of course, pandas can only be removed from existence once. But if everyone were choosing between 3 million dollars (in real value, no inflation), along with the amount of public harm associated with removal of pandas per person, or keeping things as is, I'd definitely prefer the status quo.