Transgender Discussion Thread III: Vote in our poll!

[Philjia]

Actually I'm not sure I can call it a win when all I did was walk around on a cold December morning with no-one else around.

Now don't you do yourself down like that. Actually being able to leave the house is a big step forward for you. You just need to be able to do it again and again until it no longer makes you worried.

[Noraika]

Actually I'm not sure I can call it a win when all I did was walk around on a cold December morning with no-one else around.

You're already further ahead than I was. I hadn't even left the house before when I started presenting full-time. I'd only been in my room before as a girl. Then one day I just had to force myself to go to work female, which was terrifying. Its small steps that will prepare you for the time when you present full-time female. Getting out the door is the hardest part, everything else is just stuff that'll come with time.

[The Serbian Empire]

Actually I'm not sure I can call it a win when all I did was walk around on a cold December morning with no-one else around.

You're already further ahead than I was. I hadn't even left the house before when I started presenting full-time. I'd only been in my room before as a girl. Then one day I just had to force myself to go to work female, which was terrifying. Its small steps that will prepare you for the time when you present full-time female. Getting out the door is the hardest part, everything else is just stuff that'll come with time.

Now you're braver than I am. I've emerged out of the house as female before, but only at night.

[Val Halla]

Tmw you get makeup but it isn't your style

[Torsiedelle]

Still have yet to do any of that. Most I've done is have makeup done by a friend's girlfriend.

I need to start training my hair...I planned to anyways, because it's really curly.

[The Serbian Empire]

Still have yet to do any of that. Most I've done is have makeup done by a friend's girlfriend.

I need to start training my hair...I planned to anyways, because it's really curly.

Does it form ringlets naturally? I have similar hair if it does.

[Torsiedelle]

Still have yet to do any of that. Most I've done is have makeup done by a friend's girlfriend.

I need to start training my hair...I planned to anyways, because it's really curly.

Does it form ringlets naturally? I have similar hair if it does.

Yes, actually. It's also naturally very wavy and thick.

I have those glorious Greek-Scottish genes. Superior hair.

I also have amazing lashes.

[The Serbian Empire]

Does it form ringlets naturally? I have similar hair if it does.

Yes, actually. It's also naturally very wavy and thick.

I have those glorious Greek-Scottish genes. Superior hair.

I also have amazing lashes.

The thickness could be in the strands or in my case, the very high density of follicles with fine diameter. Either way, it looks dense. My lashes leave a bit to be desired though.

[Punikstan]

G'day trans people, how's your home country treating you?

Mine still sterilizes them after their sex change, so that's great.

Also I can't bring myself to dress up publicly as I want, or else I might kill myself from being verbally abused enough by passers-by. That's a ton of fun too.

No matter. Have a good day, you fabulous bastards.

[Torsiedelle]

My home country is great. I'm gonna make it great again, high energy all the way, and I'm going to make Mexico pay for it!

[Noraika]

My parents still haven't called me...I'm just afraid they won't care...

[Punikstan]

My parents still haven't called me...I'm just afraid they won't care...

You've always got us.

[Noraika]

My parents still haven't called me...I'm just afraid they won't care...

You've always got us.

I know, but it still hurts a lot to see how my parents see me as a horrible person for transitioning, and don't even try to understand how hurt I've been, and how that's led me to do things which hurt them, but also just how fundamentally hurt I've been recently and before, by coming out to them, and feeling not even acknowledged by them...

[Punikstan]

You've always got us.

I know, but it still hurts a lot to see how my parents see me as a horrible person for transitioning, and don't even try to understand how hurt I've been, and how that's led me to do things which hurt them, but also just how fundamentally hurt I've been recently and before, by coming out to them, and feeling not even acknowledged by them...

Yeah, it sucks ass. I mean, they're parents. 9 times out of 10 those who they're supposed to be parenting expect to have them as the ones who'd love you the most and abuse you the least. Some people shouldn't simply be allowed to be parents.

[Vassenor]

Still have yet to do any of that. Most I've done is have makeup done by a friend's girlfriend.

I need to start training my hair...I planned to anyways, because it's really curly.

Really hate my hair. Want it to stay straight but upon exposure to any sort of wind or humidity makes it go wavy.

[United Marxist Nations]

G'day trans people, how's your home country treating you?

Mine still sterilizes them after their sex change, so that's great.

Also I can't bring myself to dress up publicly as I want, or else I might kill myself from being verbally abused enough by passers-by. That's a ton of fun too.

No matter. Have a good day, you fabulous bastards.

Doesn't a sex change sterilize them? I am confused.

[The Serbian Empire]

Still have yet to do any of that. Most I've done is have makeup done by a friend's girlfriend.

I need to start training my hair...I planned to anyways, because it's really curly.

Really hate my hair. Want it to stay straight but upon exposure to any sort of wind or humidity makes it go wavy.

I've given up on the idea of it ever staying straight. The best it will do is frizz.

[Noraika]

G'day trans people, how's your home country treating you?

Mine still sterilizes them after their sex change, so that's great.

Also I can't bring myself to dress up publicly as I want, or else I might kill myself from being verbally abused enough by passers-by. That's a ton of fun too.

No matter. Have a good day, you fabulous bastards.

Doesn't a sex change sterilize them? I am confused.

So does Hormone Replacement Therapy...its a really redundant and arbitrary restriction thank some countries have, that before they'll legally recognize your gender you have to be sterilized. It's entirely unnecessary. Also, unfortunately, while it might be possible soon for transgender people to be capable of reproduction as their gender, SRS does not yet give this.

[Punikstan]

G'day trans people, how's your home country treating you?

Mine still sterilizes them after their sex change, so that's great.

Also I can't bring myself to dress up publicly as I want, or else I might kill myself from being verbally abused enough by passers-by. That's a ton of fun too.

No matter. Have a good day, you fabulous bastards.

Doesn't a sex change sterilize them? I am confused.

Nah, we sterilize them manually. It is a clean domestic product with a 'Made in Finland'-stamp to the bum.

[The Serbian Empire]

Doesn't a sex change sterilize them? I am confused.

So does Hormone Replacement Therapy...its a really redundant and arbitrary restriction thank some countries have, that before they'll legally recognize your gender you have to be sterilized. It's entirely unnecessary. Also, unfortunately, while it might be possible soon for transgender people to be capable of reproduction as their gender, SRS does not yet give this.

HRT when it comes to trans women will sterilize roughly after 6-18 months of proper hormone levels. Trans men on the other hand? I'm not so sure what T does to the egg quality within the ovaries.

[Noraika]

So does Hormone Replacement Therapy...its a really redundant and arbitrary restriction thank some countries have, that before they'll legally recognize your gender you have to be sterilized. It's entirely unnecessary. Also, unfortunately, while it might be possible soon for transgender people to be capable of reproduction as their gender, SRS does not yet give this.

HRT when it comes to trans women will sterilize roughly after 6-18 months of proper hormone levels. Trans men on the other hand? I'm not so sure what T does to the egg quality within the ovaries.

It can also do the same. Not sure if the lengths of time are the same, but it can stop the menstrual cycle entirely.

[The Serbian Empire]

HRT when it comes to trans women will sterilize roughly after 6-18 months of proper hormone levels. Trans men on the other hand? I'm not so sure what T does to the egg quality within the ovaries.

It can also do the same. Not sure if the lengths of time are the same, but it can stop the menstrual cycle entirely.

The thing is sperm production stops, but male hormone production doesn't unless the testes are removed.

[Nature-Spirits]

Had my first laser appointment today. Impressions:
1) Ouch.
2) Dat burning hair smell tho.
3) Ouch.

I spent pretty much the entire time repeating in my head, "Short-term pain, long-term gain!" and "No pain no gain!", as well as pinching myself to distract from the pain of the laser. It wasn't awful, but it's sure not something I would choose to undergo if I didn't have to. Tbh, I think what made it seem bad was just that it had to be repeated in different spots across my face for about 20 minutes with essentially no respite; otherwise, it's just a brief, sharp pain.

Anyway, I'm super happy I'm having that done! Especially since I can afford it now, and probably won't really be able to next year when I won't be working as much and I'll be in school (so I won't be bringing in as much, and I'll be spending a decent amount of what I do make on tuition, textbooks, etc).

On a scale of 1-10, how is it?

Ehh, worse than having blood drawn (mostly because it's happening over and over again interminably), but not quite as bad as having dental work done with insufficient anaesthetic. So probably 5-7 ish, I'd say.

Of course, she told me we might try a slightly higher setting next appointment, so yay?

Also I wore a scarf to work today (I actually really love scarves and I have a huge collection, but I haven't been wearing them a whole lot lately since my workplace is usually sweltering), because the underside of my jaw and my neck are red and a bit swollen and I can't shave properly like this, and my laser lady told me to avoid wearing makeup on the lasered area for a few days. Like, the hairs are dead and all, but while they get pushed out I'm just going to have perpetual scruff, it seems. Hopefully it looks better in a few days.

In other news, I feel really petty for this, but I recently got a pre-christmas present (from a manager I work for) that has my dead-initials on it (and there's no way she knows my true name/initials). I mean, aside from that, its nice (just a christmas tree ornament), but still. Wat do?

Ugh, I hate when that kind of thing happens, because I feel so conflicted. It's a really nice gesture, and it's not great to look a gift horse in the mouth, but having your deadname recorded on that sort of thing is just an awful feeling.

So, I have no idea, basically. Maybe keep it for now and figure out what to do with it in a couple of years?

[Aphryss]

On a scale of 1-10, how is it?

Ehh, worse than having blood drawn (mostly because it's happening over and over again interminably), but not quite as bad as having dental work done with insufficient anaesthetic. So probably 5-7 ish, I'd say.

Of course, she told me we might try a slightly higher setting next appointment, so yay?

Also I wore a scarf to work today (I actually really love scarves and I have a huge collection, but I haven't been wearing them a whole lot lately since my workplace is usually sweltering), because the underside of my jaw and my neck are red and a bit swollen and I can't shave properly like this, and my laser lady told me to avoid wearing makeup on the lasered area for a few days. Like, the hairs are dead and all, but while they get pushed out I'm just going to have perpetual scruff, it seems. Hopefully it looks better in a few days.

In other news, I feel really petty for this, but I recently got a pre-christmas present (from a manager I work for) that has my dead-initials on it (and there's no way she knows my true name/initials). I mean, aside from that, its nice (just a christmas tree ornament), but still. Wat do?

Ugh, I hate when that kind of thing happens, because I feel so conflicted. It's a really nice gesture, and it's not great to look a gift horse in the mouth, but having your deadname recorded on that sort of thing is just an awful feeling.

So, I have no idea, basically. Maybe keep it for now and figure out what to do with it in a couple of years?

It's hard to estimate how much it hurts because you get used to it; which is not to say it hurts less as it goes on, but it has a way of recalibrating your pain threshhold. Plus, y'know, in a way it doesn't really matter how much it hurts, because that's not really relevant to the outcome. Success is the only metric. You're right about the repeated duration of it being the worst part, though - if it were just once it wouldn't be anything notable at all, really.

My personal Litany Against Pain is a kind of mashup of two of Alpha Centauri's secret projects - the Ascetic Virtues and the Virtual World. Which are not exactly fit for purpose, because Shen-Ji Yang is a monster who doesn't care about individual suffering, but they seem to work for me.

Unfortunately in my experience the fried hairs are stiffer and more brittle, which in practice means darker, more pronounced stubble for a week or two while they're pushing out. The swelling should go down in a day or two. My next session is on the nineteenth, which unfortunately means stubble for Christmas.

[The Serbian Empire]

Went around with a snow blower and realized something about HRT, it's going to be a very difficult task going forward.