NationStates

Frankly, I despise being closeted above all things. I just need to vent some, but it’s been over 2 years that I’ve been trying to wriggle out from this bloody closet and there’s no escape until college at this rate. I want this puberty to stop now, and I want to at least grasp at something more than a pathetic reflection of my true self in my social presentation and interaction. This is a vent but still, I’m frankly getting rather desperate, and very impatient.

How can I get the courage to email my teacher and tell my friend? I keep running away from it even though I really do want to tell them.

Khasinkonia wrote:Frankly, I despise being closeted above all things. I just need to vent some, but it’s been over 2 years that I’ve been trying to wriggle out from this bloody closet and there’s no escape until college at this rate. I want this puberty to stop now, and I want to at least grasp at something more than a pathetic reflection of my true self in my social presentation and interaction. This is a vent but still, I’m frankly getting rather desperate, and very impatient.

I get that. I spent several years in the closet and then started spiraling until I ended up revealing it after a ton of prodding. But the problem is that you aren't in a supportive environment IIRC, which really sucks. I can't offer you any advice really, I can just sympathize.

Cekoviu wrote:

Khasinkonia wrote:Frankly, I despise being closeted above all things. I just need to vent some, but it’s been over 2 years that I’ve been trying to wriggle out from this bloody closet and there’s no escape until college at this rate. I want this puberty to stop now, and I want to at least grasp at something more than a pathetic reflection of my true self in my social presentation and interaction. This is a vent but still, I’m frankly getting rather desperate, and very impatient.

I get that. I spent several years in the closet and then started spiraling until I ended up revealing it after a ton of prodding. But the problem is that you aren't in a supportive environment IIRC, which really sucks. I can't offer you any advice really, I can just sympathize.

After much emotional bludgeoning I’ve been able to just start seeing a psychiatrist but I still feel like my father’s just “humouring” me while my mother has, according to my brother(who I recently came out to), prayed to “cure” me and does not believe I’m trans but rather corrupted by my supportive friends. I just pray my psychiatrist will understand what’s going on and help me out.

Khasinkonia wrote:

Cekoviu wrote:I get that. I spent several years in the closet and then started spiraling until I ended up revealing it after a ton of prodding. But the problem is that you aren't in a supportive environment IIRC, which really sucks. I can't offer you any advice really, I can just sympathize.

After much emotional bludgeoning I’ve been able to just start seeing a psychiatrist but I still feel like my father’s just “humouring” me while my mother has, according to my brother(who I recently came out to), prayed to “cure” me and does not believe I’m trans but rather corrupted by my supportive friends. I just pray my psychiatrist will understand what’s going on and help me out.

Oh, so at least you're out at home. That's a thing.
Some psychiatrists with whom I've interacted have been supportive, but clumsy because they haven't interacted with many trans people in the past. Does it feel that way with your current psychiatrist, or do they have experience with trans people (or a holistic give-and-take practice, where the psychiatrist tries to learn from you as well even if they're unfamiliar)?

DiscussionPuppet wrote:How can I get the courage to email my teacher and tell my friend? I keep running away from it even though I really do want to tell them.

That's difficult to answer, honestly.

In all honesty, short of getting somebody to blackmail you or something, you've gotta just do it (if it helps, watch the Shia LaBoeuf (spelling?) thign where he just says that over and over again) on your own accord.

Khasinkonia wrote:

Cekoviu wrote:I get that. I spent several years in the closet and then started spiraling until I ended up revealing it after a ton of prodding. But the problem is that you aren't in a supportive environment IIRC, which really sucks. I can't offer you any advice really, I can just sympathize.

After much emotional bludgeoning I’ve been able to just start seeing a psychiatrist but I still feel like my father’s just “humouring” me while my mother has, according to my brother(who I recently came out to), prayed to “cure” me and does not believe I’m trans but rather corrupted by my supportive friends. I just pray my psychiatrist will understand what’s going on and help me out.

How the hell does one believe that it is a "corruption"?

Grenartia wrote:

DiscussionPuppet wrote:How can I get the courage to email my teacher and tell my friend? I keep running away from it even though I really do want to tell them.

That's difficult to answer, honestly.

In all honesty, short of getting somebody to blackmail you or something, you've gotta just do it (if it helps, watch the Shia LaBoeuf (spelling?) thign where he just says that over and over again) on your own accord.

I just noticed your sig. Really good play on the "only two genders" crowd

Western Vale Confederacy wrote:

Khasinkonia wrote:After much emotional bludgeoning I’ve been able to just start seeing a psychiatrist but I still feel like my father’s just “humouring” me while my mother has, according to my brother(who I recently came out to), prayed to “cure” me and does not believe I’m trans but rather corrupted by my supportive friends. I just pray my psychiatrist will understand what’s going on and help me out.

How the hell does one believe that it is a "corruption"?

Its a pretty recent, but shockingly common belief, especially in religious and TERF circles. I believe the term is "social contagion", at least in the more secular circles, but the more fundamentalist ones probably chalk it up to demonic possession.

Thuzbekistan wrote:

Grenartia wrote:
That's difficult to answer, honestly.

In all honesty, short of getting somebody to blackmail you or something, you've gotta just do it (if it helps, watch the Shia LaBoeuf (spelling?) thign where he just says that over and over again) on your own accord.

I just noticed your sig. Really good play on the "only two genders" crowd

Thanks. I've been meaning to update my sig, tbh.

Grenartia wrote:

Western Vale Confederacy wrote:
How the hell does one believe that it is a "corruption"?

Its a pretty recent, but shockingly common belief, especially in religious and TERF circles. I believe the term is "social contagion", at least in the more secular circles, but the more fundamentalist ones probably chalk it up to demonic possession.

We are all influenced by our family, friends and trends to an extent, but they are usually never the cause.

Western Vale Confederacy wrote:

Khasinkonia wrote:After much emotional bludgeoning I’ve been able to just start seeing a psychiatrist but I still feel like my father’s just “humouring” me while my mother has, according to my brother(who I recently came out to), prayed to “cure” me and does not believe I’m trans but rather corrupted by my supportive friends. I just pray my psychiatrist will understand what’s going on and help me out.

How the hell does one believe that it is a "corruption"?

"He was a good boy! Now hes an evil person just wanting to be happy in his own skin! The devil has risen! Lord help us all!"

Edit: I havent read enough of the thread to know if they are a MTF or otherwise, so I dont mean to misgender. I do apologize if it comes off that way.

Cekoviu wrote:

Khasinkonia wrote:After much emotional bludgeoning I’ve been able to just start seeing a psychiatrist but I still feel like my father’s just “humouring” me while my mother has, according to my brother(who I recently came out to), prayed to “cure” me and does not believe I’m trans but rather corrupted by my supportive friends. I just pray my psychiatrist will understand what’s going on and help me out.

Oh, so at least you're out at home. That's a thing.
Some psychiatrists with whom I've interacted have been supportive, but clumsy because they haven't interacted with many trans people in the past. Does it feel that way with your current psychiatrist, or do they have experience with trans people (or a holistic give-and-take practice, where the psychiatrist tries to learn from you as well even if they're unfamiliar)?

She specialises in dealing with trans people, although usually her patients are 17-18 and “sure”. I think she’ll be more firmly supportive when we’ve met more and she understands that saying I’m “as certain as I can possibly be” is a scientific yes. She’s fairly no-nonsense so hopefully once I get my mother more out of the way we can try and move forward, as she did mention going to see an endocrinologist as a possibility in the future.

Thuzbekistan wrote:

Western Vale Confederacy wrote:
How the hell does one believe that it is a "corruption"?

"He was a good boy! Now hes an evil person just wanting to be happy in his own skin! The devil has risen! Lord help us all!"

Edit: I havent read enough of the thread to know if they are a MTF or otherwise, so I dont mean to misgender. I do apologize if it comes off that way.

I’m MtF, but gendering when I’m only partially out is such a mess at this point anything will suffice as long as it’s subject to become she/her in the future.

Grenartia wrote:

Western Vale Confederacy wrote:
How the hell does one believe that it is a "corruption"?

Its a pretty recent, but shockingly common belief, especially in religious and TERF circles. I believe the term is "social contagion", at least in the more secular circles, but the more fundamentalist ones probably chalk it up to demonic possession.

Basically, I have supportive friends, therefore I’m being pressured into being trans.

Western Vale Confederacy wrote:

Grenartia wrote:
Its a pretty recent, but shockingly common belief, especially in religious and TERF circles. I believe the term is "social contagion", at least in the more secular circles, but the more fundamentalist ones probably chalk it up to demonic possession.

We are all influenced by our family, friends and trends to an extent, but they are usually never the cause.

Bingo. Supportive friends were a pleasant surprise that have helped me advocate for myself; not the cause of my desire to advocate for myself.

Khasinkonia wrote:

Grenartia wrote:
Its a pretty recent, but shockingly common belief, especially in religious and TERF circles. I believe the term is "social contagion", at least in the more secular circles, but the more fundamentalist ones probably chalk it up to demonic possession.

Basically, I have supportive friends, therefore I’m being pressured into being trans.

Essentially. People like that tend to view being trans as basically the 'pet rock' of our generation. A "hip" and "trendy" "fad".

Grenartia wrote:

Khasinkonia wrote:Basically, I have supportive friends, therefore I’m being pressured into being trans.

Essentially. People like that tend to view being trans as basically the 'pet rock' of our generation. A "hip" and "trendy" "fad".

All the cool kids are transgending.

Ifreann wrote:

Grenartia wrote:
Essentially. People like that tend to view being trans as basically the 'pet rock' of our generation. A "hip" and "trendy" "fad".

All the cool kids are transgending.

It's actually the same kind of shite that some homophobes here on the forums frequently use, that not suppressing the gays has led to more people "turning gay" because it's now "popular"; and that the gays would magically turn straight if said suppression was reinstated or some shit.

Grenartia wrote:

Khasinkonia wrote:Basically, I have supportive friends, therefore I’m being pressured into being trans.

Essentially. People like that tend to view being trans as basically the 'pet rock' of our generation. A "hip" and "trendy" "fad".

Even some people within the trans community have the mindset, I never heard of anyone being trans or transitioning for shits and giggles. Gatekeeping is awful.

Although I remember my mom asking if I was trans because I appeared to be gender non-conforming and had trans friends.

Auzkhia wrote:

Grenartia wrote:
Essentially. People like that tend to view being trans as basically the 'pet rock' of our generation. A "hip" and "trendy" "fad".

Even some people within the trans community have the mindset, I never heard of anyone being trans or transitioning for shits and giggles. Gatekeeping is awful.

Although I remember my mom asking if I was trans because I appeared to be gender non-conforming and had trans friends.

The idea of being trans being a phase is perhaps my single greatest enemy.

Anarcho capitalist utopia wrote:

Liriena wrote:https://savejames.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/09/Younger-VS-Georgulas.pdf

Specifically, James is a gender expasive or transgender child and, by choice, now goes
by the name Luna and is only known by her classmates as a girl.

ln response to Luna's choices, the Father has engaged in increasingly aggressive behavior,
including physical force, toward the Mother. His actions are clearly intended to threaten and
intimidate the Mother. Further, the Father has engaged in emotionally abusive behavior toward the
child (as example only, haircutting and other non-affiming actions).

Welp, it looks to me like your original source is lying, Anarcho capitalist utopia. The child wasn't being "forced" to be trans, and it was the father who was acting abusively.

If you believe what the mother says. Just because the court sided with an abusive mother who wants to force her son to pretend to be female, doesnt justify her actions

So you are arguing that you know better than the court who handled this case because... you read some shitty, poorly written and shamelessly biased article on lifesitenews?

Anarcho capitalist utopia wrote:James has been known to act as a girl only under his mother's precense. He has been pressured into saying those things by his mother. He did not act that way with anyone else, or at least until the mother got full custody and was able to enact her disturbing fantasies onto him

Alternative explanation: Luna presented as female under his mother's care because she's not a bigoted pile of shit like her father, who verbally and physically abused both Luna and her mother.

Liriena wrote:

Anarcho capitalist utopia wrote:James has been known to act as a girl only under his mother's precense. He has been pressured into saying those things by his mother. He did not act that way with anyone else, or at least until the mother got full custody and was able to enact her disturbing fantasies onto him

Alternative explanation: Luna presented as female under his mother's care because she's not a bigoted pile of shit like her father, who verbally and physically abused both Luna and her mother.

Its almost as if abusive shitstains tend to be really good at gaslighting their victims and portraying themselves in the best possible light.

Liriena wrote:

Anarcho capitalist utopia wrote:James has been known to act as a girl only under his mother's precense. He has been pressured into saying those things by his mother. He did not act that way with anyone else, or at least until the mother got full custody and was able to enact her disturbing fantasies onto him

Alternative explanation: Luna presented as female under his mother's care because she's not a bigoted pile of shit like her father, who verbally and physically abused both Luna and her mother.

Shouldn't this be the default explanation? It makes much more sense than these pitiful attempts by the Right to portray Luna's mother as Norma Bates.

Hanafuridake wrote:

Liriena wrote:Alternative explanation: Luna presented as female under his mother's care because she's not a bigoted pile of shit like her father, who verbally and physically abused both Luna and her mother.

Shouldn't this be the default explanation? It makes much more sense than these pitiful attempts by the Right to portray Luna's mother as Norma Bates.

It should be but in modern day politics ideology is more important than facts and reason.

Andsed wrote:

Hanafuridake wrote:
Shouldn't this be the default explanation? It makes much more sense than these pitiful attempts by the Right to portray Luna's mother as Norma Bates.

It should be but in modern day politics ideology is more important than facts and reason.

>when Ben Shapiro is both right and wrong

Maxine IV wrote:
I'm looking for information, resoutces, etc, on identifying as both male and female, if that's even a thing. I know I'm definitely feminine, but I don't think I'm trans because I don't reject my male self. I came here because I have no idea wherelse to go. Any advice would be helpful.

So, having done a little more research, I'll say that I'm genderqueer.

Guess I posted that here just so I can say it somewhere.

Anyone have any rsources available for genderqueer people (as opposed to full trans people?)

Maxine IV wrote:

Maxine IV wrote:
I'm looking for information, resoutces, etc, on identifying as both male and female, if that's even a thing. I know I'm definitely feminine, but I don't think I'm trans because I don't reject my male self. I came here because I have no idea wherelse to go. Any advice would be helpful.

So, having done a little more research, I'll say that I'm genderqueer.

Guess I posted that here just so I can say it somewhere.

Anyone have any rsources available for genderqueer people (as opposed to full trans people?)

I know this is gonna involve a lot of digging, but there should be plenty in the OP. Also, for what its worth, we're just as trans as binary trans people.