Talking to women wearing headphones

[Ethel mermania]

More like, " treat me like I am not here, I will let you know I am here, you fucking asshole."

Are there very many of these overly friendly pugilists wandering around, trying to strike up conversations with strangers and then beating them to a pulp when rebuffed?

Not alot, but again I have seen it more than once,.

[Alvecia]

I would disagree with that. Interaction is necessary in the same way mobile phones are necessary. They vastly ease communication allowing for faster, more efficient dissemination of information, but they aren't necessary.
I'll turn my phone off if I don't want to be bothered.

You don't get that option face to face, saying "I am sorry, I am doing x y or z, or I have a headache and don't want to talk" is fine. Ignoring people tends to piss the hell out of them.

It'll piss them off sure, but it's still an option.

[Memovia]

Actually I first met my high school crush when she was sitting with her earphones on hahaha
I don't think it's nice but it's not a big deal

[Mefpan]

"Talk to me! Talk to me, dammit! No? Then I'll just violently assault you, person-quietly-minding-their-own-business!"

More like, " treat me like I am not here, I will let you know I am here, you fucking asshole."

The more some waste of biomatter attempts to get my attention, the less deserving they are of it. If they want to forcefully get it, well, fuck them even more. If my glaring at them for trying to interrupt me isn't enough acknowledgement of their presence to stuff their fragile egoes, then they can gladly escalate the situation to the next level of me acknowledging their presence.

[Ethel mermania]

You might very well get punched out. It is something I have seen more than once in this circumstance.

People absolutely should not have to respond "politely" to people being impolite under threat of physical violence.

People should respond politely out of being polite in a civil society.

[Anywhere Else But Here]

Are there very many of these overly friendly pugilists wandering around, trying to strike up conversations with strangers and then beating them to a pulp when rebuffed?

Not alot, but again I have seen it more than once,.

And, to your mind, the victim was the one being rude? It's pretty rude to interrupt a stranger minding their own business. It's even worse to assault them when they don't reward your discourtesy with a conversation.

[Imperializt Russia]

People absolutely should not have to respond "politely" to people being impolite under threat of physical violence.

People should respond politely out of being polite in a civil society.

If it's under threat of physical violence, it's neither polite nor civil.

[Ethel mermania]

You don't get that option face to face, saying "I am sorry, I am doing x y or z, or I have a headache and don't want to talk" is fine. Ignoring people tends to piss the hell out of them.

It'll piss them off sure, but it's still an option.

Agreed, pissed off people tend to respond illogically and I would prefer to avoid that.

[Stagnant Axon Terminal]

"Talk to me! Talk to me, dammit! No? Then I'll just violently assault you, person-quietly-minding-their-own-business!"

More like, " treat me like I am not here, I will let you know I am here, you fucking asshole."

Ahhh, yes. Advocating for the people who assault others for hurting their feelings.

[Ethel mermania]

Not alot, but again I have seen it more than once,.

And, to your mind, the victim was the one being rude? It's pretty rude to interrupt a stranger minding their own business. It's even worse to assault them when they don't reward your discourtesy with a conversation.

Yes the person was being rude. And yes they should not have been assaulted.

And no its not rude to try and talk to another human being.

[Alvecia]

It'll piss them off sure, but it's still an option.

Agreed, pissed off people tend to respond illogically and I would prefer to avoid that.

I think that's an overreaction, both on your part and theirs, that'll likely never happen.

[Imperializt Russia]

And, to your mind, the victim was the one being rude? It's pretty rude to interrupt a stranger minding their own business. It's even worse to assault them when they don't reward your discourtesy with a conversation.

Yes the person was being rude. And yes they should not have been assaulted.

And no its not rude to try and talk to another human being.

Not where there is a context to do so. A reason.

What we're talking about, is unwarranted and unsolicited. Not even flirting, itself.

[Ethel mermania]

More like, " treat me like I am not here, I will let you know I am here, you fucking asshole."

Ahhh, yes. Advocating for the people who assault others for hurting their feelings.

Nope, try again.

[Stagnant Axon Terminal]

And, to your mind, the victim was the one being rude? It's pretty rude to interrupt a stranger minding their own business. It's even worse to assault them when they don't reward your discourtesy with a conversation.

Yes the person was being rude. And yes they should not have been assaulted.

And no its not rude to try and talk to another human being.

if I am minding my own business, occupied and wearing headphones, and you interrupt me for frivolous bullshit, YOU are the one being rude. I don't care if "hurr durr u pretty gurl" is what comes out of your mouth. If I was open for conversation, I would not be wearing headphones or otherwise being occupied.

[Ethel mermania]

Agreed, pissed off people tend to respond illogically and I would prefer to avoid that.

I think that's an overreaction, both on your part and theirs, that'll likely never happen.

On my part? How?

I am reporting what I have observed.

[Silverakia]

Yes the person was being rude. And yes they should not have been assaulted.

And no its not rude to try and talk to another human being.

if I am minding my own business, occupied and wearing headphones, and you interrupt me for frivolous bullshit, YOU are the one being rude. I don't care if "hurr durr u pretty gurl" is what comes out of your mouth. If I was open for conversation, I would not be wearing headphones or otherwise being occupied.

Exactly!

[Mefpan]

And, to your mind, the victim was the one being rude? It's pretty rude to interrupt a stranger minding their own business. It's even worse to assault them when they don't reward your discourtesy with a conversation.

Yes the person was being rude. And yes they should not have been assaulted.

And no its not rude to try and talk to another human being.

If there is a good reason for it, no, then it's not. Do you need help? Do you need someone to tell you where to go? What time it is or if I've seen any kind of person in particular? Medical emergency, and what else there is? Are you forced to interact with me due to your job being doing surveys, checking tickets or selling things to me?
I'll talk with you.

Are you just trying to strike up idle conversation because you're bored or need to release pent-up stress of any kind somehow? You better seem like a decent person to me at first glance or all you'll get is a roll of the eyes and me putting my headphones back on.

[Alvecia]

I think that's an overreaction, both on your part and theirs, that'll likely never happen.

On my part? How?

I am reporting what I have observed.

For assuming that being rude to someone will naturally result in a punch to the face. Your observations are just that. Observations of individual incidents, not at all indicative of a trend.
Some people have been hit by cars crossing roads, that doesn't mean I never cross roads.

[Ethel mermania]

Yes the person was being rude. And yes they should not have been assaulted.

And no its not rude to try and talk to another human being.

Not where there is a context to do so. A reason.

What we're talking about, is unwarranted and unsolicited. Not even flirting, itself.

Again, then respond "no thank you, I am ________".

My point is there is no right to not get bothered on the street, headphones, or reading a book does not create a magic bubble, where people are in the wrong for saying. "Hi". igoring a person saying hi is just rude and uncalled for, the "wrong ", is on the person not responding, not the person saying "hi".

[Ifreann]

People absolutely should not have to respond "politely" to people being impolite under threat of physical violence.

People should respond politely out of being polite in a civil society.

People should go out of their way to protect the feelings of others, but the world isn't your safe space.

[Anywhere Else But Here]

And, to your mind, the victim was the one being rude? It's pretty rude to interrupt a stranger minding their own business. It's even worse to assault them when they don't reward your discourtesy with a conversation.

Yes the person was being rude. And yes they should not have been assaulted.

And no its not rude to try and talk to another human being.

It's certainly a breach of some kind of etiquette, at least in my area, to attempt to strike up a conversation with a stranger in public, particularly one occupied with something else. I see nothing wrong with giving such a person the cold shoulder.

[Stagnant Axon Terminal]

Not where there is a context to do so. A reason.

What we're talking about, is unwarranted and unsolicited. Not even flirting, itself.

Again, then respond "no thank you, I am ________".

My point is there is no right to not get bothered on the street, headphones, or reading a book does not create a magic bubble, where people are in the wrong for saying. "Hi". igoring a person saying hi is just rude and uncalled for, the "wrong ", is on the person not responding, not the person saying "hi".

No, they're still rude. just because I don't have a desire to respond to people who have no business talking to me does not mean that it suddenly makes them not rude. They don't have a right to my attention, my time, or my voice. I am busy, and they can very well see that. I am not obligated to speak to them.

[Kernen]

Not where there is a context to do so. A reason.

What we're talking about, is unwarranted and unsolicited. Not even flirting, itself.

Again, then respond "no thank you, I am ________".

My point is there is no right to not get bothered on the street, headphones, or reading a book does not create a magic bubble, where people are in the wrong for saying. "Hi". igoring a person saying hi is just rude and uncalled for, the "wrong ", is on the person not responding, not the person saying "hi".

There isn't a right to be free from public interaction, but neither is there any duty to respond, especially politely. If it is somebody's right to go up to a stranger and interact, it is as much a right for the stranger to refrain from interacting.

[Mefpan]

Not where there is a context to do so. A reason.

What we're talking about, is unwarranted and unsolicited. Not even flirting, itself.

Again, then respond "no thank you, I am ________".

My point is there is no right to not get bothered on the street, headphones, or reading a book does not create a magic bubble, where people are in the wrong for saying. "Hi". igoring a person saying hi is just rude and uncalled for, the "wrong ", is on the person not responding, not the person saying "hi".

Neither is refusing to answer expressly prohibited. I'd say it's a gray area and perhaps people just ought to learn to take a hint from very obvious cues that a person might not be interested in superfluous interaction with other people.

[Reploid Productions]

Your first mistake is using People as a viable source of information for things such as that....I'm glad this thread can give you a "heres why you should talk to women wearing headphones". Let me just put in my two pence..... JUST DO IT. If you see a girl you like you go talk to her. Maybe in at the gym, or at Uni, at work etc etc. You see this girl and you keep telling yourself you are going to talk to this girl. What are you waiting for? JUST DO IT! Yesterday you said tomorrow. Don't let girls get away from you (not to be taken literally in a creepy kidnapping way)...JUST DO IT. The worst she can say is no and some people wont even stop there. So just do it...make your dreams come true. She may say yes. She may so no. You wont know until you JUST DO IT!

That's enough of that now.

Yeah, fine, go for it, take the shot.... so long as you also take "No" for an answer. She might say yes, but if she says no, let it go.Therein lies the problem, way back at the start when the discussion was about a stupid "advice" article by some sleazy pickup artist on how to badger women who are wearing headphones into talking to you. I cannot count the number of times I have had a conversations that are basically variations on this:

Me> *wearing headphones while out in public*
Random Joe> *taps shoulder*
Me> *removes headphones* Yes?
Random Joe> *flirty pickup line*
Me> No thanks, not interested, you're not my type, please leave me alone.
Random Joe> *indignant protest that I don't even know him and haven't talked to him, so how could I possibly know he's not my type?!*
Me> Are you taking no for an answer?
Random Joe> *smug reply, bonus points for vaguely creepy stalkery leer/line*
Me> Then you're not my type. My type has manners and listens when a woman says no. Please leave me alone. *headphones back on*

OPTIONAL BONUS ROUND!
Random Joe> *taps shoulder again, insistence that he's a Nice Guy^TM and I owe him a chance*
Me> *does not take headphones off* I said I'm busy, leave me alone.
Random Joe> *more forcefully demands I listen to him*
(If conversation is in something like a coffee shop or other private property:) Me> *tone that is IRL equivalent of the red mod warning text* You either leave me alone, or I complain to the staff here that you are harassing me, and I continue complaining until either you leave me alone or you are thrown out of the premises.
(If conversation is out in a public space:) Me> *tone that is IRL equivalent of the red mod warning text* You either leave me alone, or you can keep harassing me until I feel it is necessary to defend myself and/or call the police.

USUALLY by that point even the most obnoxious of pickup assholes will get the hint. Haven't had one go to the point of actually breaking out the tazer, though there've been a few that came close, and I've ended up getting a few ejected from stores. I have a base line of politeness I start out with toward anyone; how they behave changes that level considerably. Try to talk to me, get rebuffed politely, and take the hint to drop it; then no harm, no foul. Try to talk to me, get rebuffed politely, and then continue demanding my time and attention when I have made it unambiguously clear that I have no interest and would like to be left alone on the other hand, then "politely" quickly goes away.