The Easternal Thread

[The Serbian Empire]

I have a pole you can dance with bby.

His name is Aleksander and he likes classical dance styles.

My husband made a joke like that once.
"I have a pole for you. His heads on a pike somewhere I swear"

So that's what happened to Uncle Vladislaw.

[Veceria]

I have a pole you can dance with bby.

His name is Aleksander and he likes classical dance styles.

My husband made a joke like that once.
"I have a pole for you. His heads on a pike somewhere I swear"

Waaah you said the h-word!

[Talvezout]

How should I answer this one....?

The Pohoda-Ostravas Journal
VOL. 32 NO. 430CITY FINAL
TUESDAY APRIL 19, 2016
Easter Egg: Please, Sir, We Want Some More Issues

The Issue

With the same old dilemmas confronting Talvezout time and time again, people are demanding to know why there aren't more genuinely new issues.

The Debate

"Well, that's because they're all twaddle," says [violet] matter-of-factly while twirling a lighter in her hands. "I'm sick and tired of reading that garbage. I've decided to scrap the player-submitted system -- but don't tell anyone that. The endless waves of hate mail would overwhelm the server."

Accept

"The aim of this site is to promote my novel, not the writing talents of literary wannabes," scoffs Max Barry while sipping an iced-Margarita on a yacht in the South Pacific. "I've ordered the mods to only approve mediocre issues to ensure that no one discovers there are better writers out there than me."

Accept

"I've been combing through the queue, carefully examining each draft and determining its potential," sighs Sedgistan who is sitting next to an orderly stack of drafts stamped 'no way in hell'. "I'm confronted with thousands upon thousands of issues. I have to manage multiple editors and somehow still place in the Mod Olympics. Do you have any idea how much stress that puts on me? That's why it takes so long. Stop breathing down my neck. If you want to be useful, go help out the newbies in Got Issues."

Accept

"Huh? What's that?" says Sanctaria absentmindedly, looking up from an intimidating series of flow charts. "More issues? Well, it's your lucky day! I'm working on my next great chain. It will dwarf my last one in size and complexity. Forget everything you know about issues, every rule you think we can't break, because this chain is going to break them all."

Accept

"I couldn't agree with this more!" yelps Comrade Lenyo, his arms full of drafts. "We've received over 6,000 submissions! If we just got rid of the delete button, that'd be over 6,000 more issues. Who doesn't want that? Why are we still wasting time talking about this? Why are you reading this instead of submitting more drafts for us to add? EVERY. SECOND. COUNTS!"

Accept

The deafening Voice of Mod booms down from the heavens, "You will receive new issues when you receive new issues. Your questioning is undermining the authority of the mods. I've deleted enough nations to know flaming when I read it. You have been warned."

Accept

[Internationalist Bastard]

My husband made a joke like that once.
"I have a pole for you. His heads on a pike somewhere I swear"

Waaah you said the h-word!

Head?

[Italios]

My husband made a joke like that once.
"I have a pole for you. His heads on a pike somewhere I swear"

Waaah you said the h-word!

HATE. HATE, HATE, HATE, HATE.

I know, it's a very strong word.

[Ethel mermania]

luv, it isn't for me.

You can't be sure without experimentation.

Needs a lot more lube.

[Veceria]

Waaah you said the h-word!

Head?

Waaah you said the h-word!

HATE. HATE, HATE, HATE, HATE.

I know, it's a very strong word.

Husband! The bad word!
Everyone on the internet is single and miserable! And can't into social stuff!

[Internationalist Bastard]

My husband made a joke like that once.
"I have a pole for you. His heads on a pike somewhere I swear"

So that's what happened to Uncle Vladislaw.

Was he veteran of the Conquests?

[Internationalist Bastard]

Head?

HATE. HATE, HATE, HATE, HATE.

I know, it's a very strong word.

Husband! The bad word!
Everyone on the internet is single and miserable! And can't into social stuff!

Oh that, don't worry, I am

[Internationalist Bastard]

You can't be sure without experimentation.

Needs a lot more lube.

Oh my

[Italios]

My God. The school election results were worse than I could've imagined.

[Internationalist Bastard]

My God. The school election results were worse than I could've imagined.

Trump?

[Gallade]

You can't be sure without experimentation.

Needs a lot more lube.

Lube's really a recommended product for most activities, to be fair. Never chafe again!

[Italios]

My God. The school election results were worse than I could've imagined.

Trump?

No. Most went for Kasich, a little sillily, but Cruz just beat Trump. Disappointing, considering how liberal this place is, I'd definitely expected Trump to win out. I suppose they just didn't go for Trump because of how the media portrays him.

Bernie lost. Miserably.

[Ethel mermania]

Needs a lot more lube.

Oh my

Hurde isn't here, someone needed to use the line.

[Internationalist Bastard]

Trump?

No. Most went for Kasich, a little sillily, but Cruz just beat Trump. Disappointing, considering how liberal this place is, I'd definitely expected Trump to win out. I suppose they just didn't go for Trump because of how the media portrays him.

Bernie lost. Miserably.

Eh, Kasich is the only one I can take seriously, which is depressing

[Kannap]

I only got four hours of sleep last night because I just could not fall asleep and I now have to write a literature criticism paper that I don't want to write and don't know what to write about.

[Italios]

I only got four hours of sleep last night because I just could not fall asleep and I now have to write a literature criticism paper that I don't want to write and don't know what to write about.

Is it a bad criticism? "This book fucking sucked. Don't read it. By the second sentence I had fallen asleep."

Or was it a good book? "Wow. This book blew me away. It's one of my new favourites. I've already sent in an application to join its official Fandom Club."

[Internationalist Bastard]

I only got four hours of sleep last night because I just could not fall asleep and I now have to write a literature criticism paper that I don't want to write and don't know what to write about.

What id you read?

[Kannap]

I only got four hours of sleep last night because I just could not fall asleep and I now have to write a literature criticism paper that I don't want to write and don't know what to write about.

What id you read?

It just has to be a thing from the customized Norton Mix for my college.

[Kannap]

I only got four hours of sleep last night because I just could not fall asleep and I now have to write a literature criticism paper that I don't want to write and don't know what to write about.

Is it a bad criticism? "This book fucking sucked. Don't read it. By the second sentence I had fallen asleep."

Or was it a good book? "Wow. This book blew me away. It's one of my new favourites. I've already sent in an application to join its official Fandom Club."

I have to decided what short story/poem/essay/whatever from the Norton Mix I am going to write about first.

[Internationalist Bastard]

What id you read?

It just has to be a thing from the customized Norton Mix for my college.

?

[Luziyca]

It just has to be a thing from the customized Norton Mix for my college.

?

Atlas Shrugged written in the style of Fifty Shades of Gray.

[Internationalist Bastard]

?

Atlas Shrugged written in the style of Fifty Shades of Gray.

Ohhhhhh college sucks

[Italios]

Is it a bad criticism? "This book fucking sucked. Don't read it. By the second sentence I had fallen asleep."

Or was it a good book? "Wow. This book blew me away. It's one of my new favourites. I've already sent in an application to join its official Fandom Club."

I have to decided what short story/poem/essay/whatever from the Norton Mix I am going to write about first.

What?

Why choose a "Norton Mix" poem when you can choose Shel Silverstein?