NationStates' Transgender Thread II

[Philjia]

So today someone told me that the white bar on the trans flag actually symbolizes how no one will ever be able to change their gender, so they are trapped in the body God gave them whether they were mentally unstable or not, This was so stupid i almost killed myself writing it

[Noraika]

So today someone told me that the white bar on the trans flag actually symbolizes how no one will ever be able to change their gender, so they are trapped in the body God gave them whether they were mentally unstable or not, This was so stupid i almost killed myself writing it

Well I mean their partially right. No one can change their gender. Which is why trying to 'fix' transgender people is both completely ineffective and completely unethical. Transgender people are already their gender. Trans girls ARE girls, trans men ARE men, and so on and so forth, and we shouldn't try and make them try and change their gender to conform to what we think is right and wrong. Overall this is why I find that argument extremely amusing when its used.

[Val Halla]

Doesn't the white on the trans flag symbolise lack of binary gender?

[Noraika]

Doesn't the white on the trans flag symbolise lack of binary gender?

Was pretty sure that's what its there for as well.

[Sammuramat]

Hi, curious about you guys would think about a few things. I'm starting to perhaps think I might be non-binary. For years now, I haven't felt associated with my assigned gender, and I feel uncomfortable knowing people think of me as that gender. I can't be entirely sure, though, that this isn't just low self esteem, or just me wanting attention.

How do I tell if what I'm feeling is actually dysphoria? There are so many different definitions I've been given. Some have told me that dysphoria is only not completely identifying with assigned gender, some say it can only be physical. I don't really know how much of my body dysphoria is 'I don't want this body because of what it is' or 'I don't want this body because of what it makes others think'. When I first started to think about this, around a year ago, I was only aware of the second definition, and said I didn't feel dysphoria - then got steamrollered by people thinking I didn't experience it by the first definition, so I had no right to feel uncomfortable at all. It was a pretty bad experience, and I've only really started thinking about this again. I recently met a trans man in real life, the first trans person I was ever aware of meeting, and ever since then I can't get rid of some deep sense of envy. I don't know whether the envy was over him being able to transition, or the fact that he was just a pretty great person who people liked.

Thing is - I don't know if even if I had dysphoria, it would even be bad enough to count. I could probably keep living as my assigned gender forever. I might not enjoy it, but it would be much easier to just ignore it, as I've been doing so far.

I dunno, just wanted somewhere to put this, and ask if this even counts.

[Philjia]

Hi, curious about you guys would think about a few things. I'm starting to perhaps think I might be non-binary. For years now, I haven't felt associated with my assigned gender, and I feel uncomfortable knowing people think of me as that gender. I can't be entirely sure, though, that this isn't just low self esteem, or just me wanting attention.

How do I tell if what I'm feeling is actually dysphoria? There are so many different definitions I've been given. Some have told me that dysphoria is only not completely identifying with assigned gender, some say it can only be physical. I don't really know how much of my body dysphoria is 'I don't want this body because of what it is' or 'I don't want this body because of what it makes others think'. When I first started to think about this, around a year ago, I was only aware of the second definition, and said I didn't feel dysphoria - then got steamrollered by people thinking I didn't experience it by the first definition, so I had no right to feel uncomfortable at all. It was a pretty bad experience, and I've only really started thinking about this again. I recently met a trans man in real life, the first trans person I was ever aware of meeting, and ever since then I can't get rid of some deep sense of envy. I don't know whether the envy was over him being able to transition, or the fact that he was just a pretty great person who people liked.

Thing is - I don't know if even if I had dysphoria, it would even be bad enough to count. I could probably keep living as my assigned gender forever. I might not enjoy it, but it would be much easier to just ignore it, as I've been doing so far.

I dunno, just wanted somewhere to put this, and ask if this even counts.

Hello new person. Fear not, we're here to help.

Dysphoria is not a uniform sensation. For some, it's merely a sense of dissatisfaction. For others, it's a crippling disconnect and revulsion to parts of their body. Some trans people barely experience it at all.

As for your identity, I don't claim any great authority on the subject, but trying to imagine how you would like to be, if freed from any social pressures, might be a useful exercise.

[The Serbian Empire]

So today someone told me that the white bar on the trans flag actually symbolizes how no one will ever be able to change their gender, so they are trapped in the body God gave them whether they were mentally unstable or not, This was so stupid i almost killed myself writing it

I thought it was for the non-binary folk.

[Greater Orensta]

So today someone told me that the white bar on the trans flag actually symbolizes how no one will ever be able to change their gender, so they are trapped in the body God gave them whether they were mentally unstable or not, This was so stupid i almost killed myself writing it

I thought it was for the non-binary folk.

It is, someone told me otherwise

[Nature-Spirits]

Hi, curious about you guys would think about a few things. I'm starting to perhaps think I might be non-binary. For years now, I haven't felt associated with my assigned gender, and I feel uncomfortable knowing people think of me as that gender. I can't be entirely sure, though, that this isn't just low self esteem, or just me wanting attention.

How do I tell if what I'm feeling is actually dysphoria? There are so many different definitions I've been given. Some have told me that dysphoria is only not completely identifying with assigned gender, some say it can only be physical. I don't really know how much of my body dysphoria is 'I don't want this body because of what it is' or 'I don't want this body because of what it makes others think'. When I first started to think about this, around a year ago, I was only aware of the second definition, and said I didn't feel dysphoria - then got steamrollered by people thinking I didn't experience it by the first definition, so I had no right to feel uncomfortable at all. It was a pretty bad experience, and I've only really started thinking about this again. I recently met a trans man in real life, the first trans person I was ever aware of meeting, and ever since then I can't get rid of some deep sense of envy. I don't know whether the envy was over him being able to transition, or the fact that he was just a pretty great person who people liked.

Thing is - I don't know if even if I had dysphoria, it would even be bad enough to count. I could probably keep living as my assigned gender forever. I might not enjoy it, but it would be much easier to just ignore it, as I've been doing so far.

I dunno, just wanted somewhere to put this, and ask if this even counts.

Hi there! Fear not, for I have been in a similar place.

Try not to think of whether your dysphoria "counts". All dysphoria, no matter how it manifests itself, is a valid feeling. There are some trans people and gender specialists who will tell you that you have to be a certain kind of trans to be valid and to transition. These people are spouting nonsense, and the popular opinion is increasingly that anyone who wants to transition in some way should do so.

Take me. For a long time I wasn't sure if I should take hormones, because although I hate having a male-typical body, I also don't want to look like and be read as a woman all the time. After significant research and contemplation, however, I discovered that it was possible to take a lower dose of hormones, in order to androgynise the body. This is now my plan, which I am beginning to actively pursue now that I'm in a place in my life where I can begin transition.

I also don't really want genital surgery. Sometimes my genitals feel out of place on my body, but I don't really want to trade my penis in for a vagina; that wouldn't feel completely right either. Some people would tell me that because of that, I'm not truly trans. I'd like to get an orchiectomy someday, to alleviate some of that minor dysphoria, as well as to make it easier to tuck. But that's it, and that's okay. I don't need to get rid of my penis to be not-a-man.

The point is, just because you don't have a mainstream narrative, that doesn't mean you aren't just as valid as any other trans person. You should just do your own thing. And it's okay, too, to take your time. Self-exploration is not a race; it's a lifelong process.

In closing: You might be trans, you might be cis. Only you can figure out what your gender is. But either way, we're here to support you in your journey, if you'd like.

[PaNTuXIa]

So today someone told me that the white bar on the trans flag actually symbolizes how no one will ever be able to change their gender, so they are trapped in the body God gave them whether they were mentally unstable or not, This was so stupid i almost killed myself writing it

Yikes.

[Greater Orensta]

So today someone told me that the white bar on the trans flag actually symbolizes how no one will ever be able to change their gender, so they are trapped in the body God gave them whether they were mentally unstable or not, This was so stupid i almost killed myself writing it

Yikes.

ick

[Grenartia]

Hi, curious about you guys would think about a few things. I'm starting to perhaps think I might be non-binary. For years now, I haven't felt associated with my assigned gender, and I feel uncomfortable knowing people think of me as that gender. I can't be entirely sure, though, that this isn't just low self esteem, or just me wanting attention.

How do I tell if what I'm feeling is actually dysphoria? There are so many different definitions I've been given. Some have told me that dysphoria is only not completely identifying with assigned gender, some say it can only be physical. I don't really know how much of my body dysphoria is 'I don't want this body because of what it is' or 'I don't want this body because of what it makes others think'. When I first started to think about this, around a year ago, I was only aware of the second definition, and said I didn't feel dysphoria - then got steamrollered by people thinking I didn't experience it by the first definition, so I had no right to feel uncomfortable at all. It was a pretty bad experience, and I've only really started thinking about this again. I recently met a trans man in real life, the first trans person I was ever aware of meeting, and ever since then I can't get rid of some deep sense of envy. I don't know whether the envy was over him being able to transition, or the fact that he was just a pretty great person who people liked.

Thing is - I don't know if even if I had dysphoria, it would even be bad enough to count. I could probably keep living as my assigned gender forever. I might not enjoy it, but it would be much easier to just ignore it, as I've been doing so far.

I dunno, just wanted somewhere to put this, and ask if this even counts.

Hi there! Fear not, for I have been in a similar place.

Try not to think of whether your dysphoria "counts". All dysphoria, no matter how it manifests itself, is a valid feeling. There are some trans people and gender specialists who will tell you that you have to be a certain kind of trans to be valid and to transition. These people are spouting nonsense, and the popular opinion is increasingly that anyone who wants to transition in some way should do so.

Take me. For a long time I wasn't sure if I should take hormones, because although I hate having a male-typical body, I also don't want to look like and be read as a woman all the time. After significant research and contemplation, however, I discovered that it was possible to take a lower dose of hormones, in order to androgynise the body. This is now my plan, which I am beginning to actively pursue now that I'm in a place in my life where I can begin transition.

I also don't really want genital surgery. Sometimes my genitals feel out of place on my body, but I don't really want to trade my penis in for a vagina; that wouldn't feel completely right either. Some people would tell me that because of that, I'm not truly trans. I'd like to get an orchiectomy someday, to alleviate some of that minor dysphoria, as well as to make it easier to tuck. But that's it, and that's okay. I don't need to get rid of my penis to be not-a-man.

The point is, just because you don't have a mainstream narrative, that doesn't mean you aren't just as valid as any other trans person. You should just do your own thing. And it's okay, too, to take your time. Self-exploration is not a race; it's a lifelong process.

In closing: You might be trans, you might be cis. Only you can figure out what your gender is. But either way, we're here to support you in your journey, if you'd like.

^

Entirely this.

[The Serbian Empire]

So today someone told me that the white bar on the trans flag actually symbolizes how no one will ever be able to change their gender, so they are trapped in the body God gave them whether they were mentally unstable or not, This was so stupid i almost killed myself writing it

Yikes.

I'd consider your response as mine as well.

[Renewed Imperial Germany-]

So today someone told me that the white bar on the trans flag actually symbolizes how no one will ever be able to change their gender, so they are trapped in the body God gave them whether they were mentally unstable or not, This was so stupid i almost killed myself writing it

I would bash my head against a wall, but my platelets are still low so I'd rather not bleed out.

[The Serbian Empire]

So today someone told me that the white bar on the trans flag actually symbolizes how no one will ever be able to change their gender, so they are trapped in the body God gave them whether they were mentally unstable or not, This was so stupid i almost killed myself writing it

I would bash my head against a wall, but my platelets are still low so I'd rather not bleed out.

Needs more platelets.

[Renewed Imperial Germany-]

I would bash my head against a wall, but my platelets are still low so I'd rather not bleed out.

Needs more platelets.

Construct more pylons platelets!

[United Socialist Republic of Antarctica]

Hey so let me know if this is an actual thing.

I was sitting down, and music was playing, and (I can't remember how I got to this position, but I somehow did) my hands were on my neck turned out so that the part that's equivalent to your heel was on my throat, and my elbows were resting on my lap. A song with a female singer came on, and I've made it a habit of always singing to songs with a female singer as long as it's not ridiculously high to practice making my voice more feminine, so I started singing with the music, and I was about to take my hands off my throat and sit up straight to have better posture for singing, when I noticed a vibration towards the top of my throat whenever I was singing, and a little info on how I am with my voice: when I am singing with a female singer, I sound nearly perfect, as I just have a natural talent for replicating voice as I'm hearing it, but when I'm talking, I still don't sound that great, so I talked normally while feeling my throat, and I felt the vibration in my throat again, but it was more towards the bottom of my throat, and a bit less vibrate-y, so I tried replicating the vibration I felt while singing, and I haven't checked it out with a voice recorder yet, but it was definately higher in pitch, and sounded a bit more feminine.

So is this an actual thing, or am I just hallucinating? Has anybody else had a similar experience or is this even a legit thing in voice training programs? I've just been changing my voice by experimenting with different manipulations and listening to myself.

[The Serbian Empire]

Hey so let me know if this is an actual thing.

I was sitting down, and music was playing, and (I can't remember how I got to this position, but I somehow did) my hands were on my neck turned out so that the part that's equivalent to your heel was on my throat, and my elbows were resting on my lap. A song with a female singer came on, and I've made it a habit of always singing to songs with a female singer as long as it's not ridiculously high to practice making my voice more feminine, so I started singing with the music, and I was about to take my hands off my throat and sit up straight to have better posture for singing, when I noticed a vibration towards the top of my throat whenever I was singing, and a little info on how I am with my voice: when I am singing with a female singer, I sound nearly perfect, as I just have a natural talent for replicating voice as I'm hearing it, but when I'm talking, I still don't sound that great, so I talked normally while feeling my throat, and I felt the vibration in my throat again, but it was more towards the bottom of my throat, and a bit less vibrate-y, so I tried replicating the vibration I felt while singing, and I haven't checked it out with a voice recorder yet, but it was definately higher in pitch, and sounded a bit more feminine.

So is this an actual thing, or am I just hallucinating? Has anybody else had a similar experience or is this even a legit thing in voice training programs? I've just been changing my voice by experimenting with different manipulations and listening to myself.

I can tell you that training can do what you're doing.

[Nature-Spirits]

Hey so let me know if this is an actual thing.

I was sitting down, and music was playing, and (I can't remember how I got to this position, but I somehow did) my hands were on my neck turned out so that the part that's equivalent to your heel was on my throat, and my elbows were resting on my lap. A song with a female singer came on, and I've made it a habit of always singing to songs with a female singer as long as it's not ridiculously high to practice making my voice more feminine, so I started singing with the music, and I was about to take my hands off my throat and sit up straight to have better posture for singing, when I noticed a vibration towards the top of my throat whenever I was singing, and a little info on how I am with my voice: when I am singing with a female singer, I sound nearly perfect, as I just have a natural talent for replicating voice as I'm hearing it, but when I'm talking, I still don't sound that great, so I talked normally while feeling my throat, and I felt the vibration in my throat again, but it was more towards the bottom of my throat, and a bit less vibrate-y, so I tried replicating the vibration I felt while singing, and I haven't checked it out with a voice recorder yet, but it was definately higher in pitch, and sounded a bit more feminine.

So is this an actual thing, or am I just hallucinating? Has anybody else had a similar experience or is this even a legit thing in voice training programs? I've just been changing my voice by experimenting with different manipulations and listening to myself.

Yes! I don't know any of the fancy terms, but I think what you're referring to is what's typically called the "head voice", as opposed to the "chest voice".

[Aphryss]

So I've been trying to write an update on my progress and it's mostly been a long rambly whiny screed because, well, there has been no progress, and I'm fed up. Time has ground down my enthusiasm and determination and now I don't feel particularly feminine - or masculine - just infinitely fed up with the whole business.

This has left me wrestling with self-doubt, trying to figure out if I actually still want to transition at all ... except not transitioning will solve nothing, and this liminal state is tolerable only because it is transitory. I can't go back to being male but I don't know if becoming female will solve anything.

There. That is at least a shorter whiny screed. Grrr. Argh.

[Philjia]

So I've been trying to write an update on my progress and it's mostly been a long rambly whiny screed because, well, there has been no progress, and I'm fed up. Time has ground down my enthusiasm and determination and now I don't feel particularly feminine - or masculine - just infinitely fed up with the whole business.

This has left me wrestling with self-doubt, trying to figure out if I actually still want to transition at all ... except not transitioning will solve nothing, and this liminal state is tolerable only because it is transitory. I can't go back to being male but I don't know if becoming female will solve anything.

There. That is at least a shorter whiny screed. Grrr. Argh.

Being stuck is always frustrating, but if you allow yourself to not try to keep moving you really will go nowhere.

[Renewed Imperial Germany-]

So I've been trying to write an update on my progress and it's mostly been a long rambly whiny screed because, well, there has been no progress, and I'm fed up. Time has ground down my enthusiasm and determination and now I don't feel particularly feminine - or masculine - just infinitely fed up with the whole business.

This has left me wrestling with self-doubt, trying to figure out if I actually still want to transition at all ... except not transitioning will solve nothing, and this liminal state is tolerable only because it is transitory. I can't go back to being male but I don't know if becoming female will solve anything.

There. That is at least a shorter whiny screed. Grrr. Argh.

Being stuck is always frustrating, but if you allow yourself to not try to keep moving you really will go nowhere.

Can confirm

[Nature-Spirits]

So I've been trying to write an update on my progress and it's mostly been a long rambly whiny screed because, well, there has been no progress, and I'm fed up. Time has ground down my enthusiasm and determination and now I don't feel particularly feminine - or masculine - just infinitely fed up with the whole business.

This has left me wrestling with self-doubt, trying to figure out if I actually still want to transition at all ... except not transitioning will solve nothing, and this liminal state is tolerable only because it is transitory. I can't go back to being male but I don't know if becoming female will solve anything.

There. That is at least a shorter whiny screed. Grrr. Argh.

I know it's frustrating feeling like you can't do anything to progress. All you can really do is keep fighting and hope that you come out in a better place. In the meantime, why not do something small to make yourself feel better? Go buy some makeup, or cute panties or something. That usually makes me feel better.

[Noraika]

So I've been trying to write an update on my progress and it's mostly been a long rambly whiny screed because, well, there has been no progress, and I'm fed up. Time has ground down my enthusiasm and determination and now I don't feel particularly feminine - or masculine - just infinitely fed up with the whole business.

This has left me wrestling with self-doubt, trying to figure out if I actually still want to transition at all ... except not transitioning will solve nothing, and this liminal state is tolerable only because it is transitory. I can't go back to being male but I don't know if becoming female will solve anything.

There. That is at least a shorter whiny screed. Grrr. Argh.

I know it's frustrating feeling like you can't do anything to progress. All you can really do is keep fighting and hope that you come out in a better place. In the meantime, why not do something small to make yourself feel better? Go buy some makeup, or cute panties or something. That usually makes me feel better.

Not going to lie. Cute is something that's pretty hard for me at times. All that socialization about cute being 'embarrassing' and fear of drawing attention to myself, or looking immature, really sometimes keeps me from getting clothes I like. ^-^;

[The Serbian Empire]

I know it's frustrating feeling like you can't do anything to progress. All you can really do is keep fighting and hope that you come out in a better place. In the meantime, why not do something small to make yourself feel better? Go buy some makeup, or cute panties or something. That usually makes me feel better.

Not going to lie. Cute is something that's pretty hard for me at times. All that socialization about cute being 'embarrassing' and fear of drawing attention to myself, or looking immature, really sometimes keeps me from getting clothes I like. ^-^;

And length is another issue for us taller women. I know that finding long enough sleeves will be an eternal battle.