NationStates' Transgender Thread II

[Philjia]

Going to a doctor to ask them if you're trans? WAW O_o

I remember the days (waw I'm sooooooo old xD) that doctors would only help you if you knew and felt the magical words XDDD

The magical words being: "I am a girl" not: "I want to be a girl" or "I feel like a girl" but "I AM A GIRL", because the 2 other sentences were HUGE red lights back in the day of transitional gate keeping (Especially "I want to be a girl" because it indicates that the person who says this, doesn't actually experience themselves as a girl, but desires to be one for ulterior reasons that exist outside of an inner experience of being)

Tera, you don't need to be a girl to be allowed to shave your legs or get laser. Many men shave their arms and legs and get laser, it's nothing to be ashamed about. Only transition if you have a permanent deep seeded experience of non-belonging in your body. If being experienced by everyone around you as male gives you a feeling of anxiousness, panic and sadness. If you look in the mirror and you feel that that isn't you. If the most inner, most fundamental parts of your inside tell you: "I AM a girl, this body isn't right, it's NOT ME!!!". If throughout all of your life you've had these feelings of non-belonging, of lack of self identification with your own body, etc.

I'm not telling you: "Don't transition" I'm telling you: "Explore your feelings, explore in what way you feel you are suffering and try to relate those feelings with past events and past experiences you've had. You don't suddenly become transgender, it's something you're born as, so most likely you might find dysphoric attacks you've had throughout all of your life."

I'm slightly confused about the point you are trying to make.

It's a very meandering way if saying that even though the way your body is displeases you, there are things you could be other than a woman.

[Socialist Tera]

Going to a doctor to ask them if you're trans? WAW O_o

I remember the days (waw I'm sooooooo old xD) that doctors would only help you if you knew and felt the magical words XDDD

The magical words being: "I am a girl" not: "I want to be a girl" or "I feel like a girl" but "I AM A GIRL", because the 2 other sentences were HUGE red lights back in the day of transitional gate keeping (Especially "I want to be a girl" because it indicates that the person who says this, doesn't actually experience themselves as a girl, but desires to be one for ulterior reasons that exist outside of an inner experience of being)

Tera, you don't need to be a girl to be allowed to shave your legs or get laser. Many men shave their arms and legs and get laser, it's nothing to be ashamed about. Only transition if you have a permanent deep seeded experience of non-belonging in your body. If being experienced by everyone around you as male gives you a feeling of anxiousness, panic and sadness. If you look in the mirror and you feel that that isn't you. If the most inner, most fundamental parts of your inside tell you: "I AM a girl, this body isn't right, it's NOT ME!!!". If throughout all of your life you've had these feelings of non-belonging, of lack of self identification with your own body, etc.

I'm not telling you: "Don't transition" I'm telling you: "Explore your feelings, explore in what way you feel you are suffering and try to relate those feelings with past events and past experiences you've had. You don't suddenly become transgender, it's something you're born as, so most likely you might find dysphoric attacks you've had throughout all of your life."

I've had them since early teenaged years, never had them as a child. Materialistic wise, I am not a girl, I feel like I should be a girl but materialistically I am not one yet. Fuck. I've even tried to drinking it away but it doesn't work.

[United Socialist Republic of Antarctica]

Going to a doctor to ask them if you're trans? WAW O_o

I remember the days (waw I'm sooooooo old xD) that doctors would only help you if you knew and felt the magical words XDDD

The magical words being: "I am a girl" not: "I want to be a girl" or "I feel like a girl" but "I AM A GIRL", because the 2 other sentences were HUGE red lights back in the day of transitional gate keeping (Especially "I want to be a girl" because it indicates that the person who says this, doesn't actually experience themselves as a girl, but desires to be one for ulterior reasons that exist outside of an inner experience of being)

Tera, you don't need to be a girl to be allowed to shave your legs or get laser. Many men shave their arms and legs and get laser, it's nothing to be ashamed about. Only transition if you have a permanent deep seeded experience of non-belonging in your body. If being experienced by everyone around you as male gives you a feeling of anxiousness, panic and sadness. If you look in the mirror and you feel that that isn't you. If the most inner, most fundamental parts of your inside tell you: "I AM a girl, this body isn't right, it's NOT ME!!!". If throughout all of your life you've had these feelings of non-belonging, of lack of self identification with your own body, etc.

I'm not telling you: "Don't transition" I'm telling you: "Explore your feelings, explore in what way you feel you are suffering and try to relate those feelings with past events and past experiences you've had. You don't suddenly become transgender, it's something you're born as, so most likely you might find dysphoric attacks you've had throughout all of your life."

I've had them since early teenaged years, never had them as a child. Materialistic wise, I am not a girl, I feel like I should be a girl but materialistically I am not one yet. Fuck. I've even tried to drinking it away but it doesn't work.

If by materialistic, you mean getting all the the things and just having a lot of stuff, I'm personally a minimalist, and hate clutter, even though you wouldn't be able to tell by looking at my room, as depression sucks.
If you mean liking to shop, I know girls who don't like shopping, and guys who love it, so don't get caught up in stereotypes. Just be who you are and don't let others tell you otherwise.

[Nature-Spirits]

I would disagree that you should only transition if you have deep-seated, horrible dysphoria. I mean, yes, if you do have really bad dysphoria obviously you should transition, but even if you don't, as long as you feel that your quality of life would improve with transition, you should just go ahead and do it. No one else can decide for you what your gender is, or what modifications you should make to your body. That's all up to you.

And when you're trying to figure out your gender, honestly, throw out everything you know about gender roles and stereotypes. Gender expression has nothing to do with gender identity. You don't have to be feminine to be a woman, you don't have to be masculine to be a man. Gender goes deeper than that.

And you don't have to have experienced dysphoria from an early age for your feelings now to be valid, either. My dysphoria started when I reached puberty, and I only realised I was trans when I was 16. That doesn't take away the fact that I am trans, that I do have dysphoria, and that transition is the best option for me.

Also, you don't necessarily have to be a man or a woman. You really don't have to choose one or the other. When I first started experiencing dysphoria, I explored my gender. But the thing is, I couldn't decide whether I would rather be a boy or a girl, and I buried my feelings. They resurfaced once I discovered non-binary gender, and now I happily identify as non-binary. I plan to take hormones to alter my body, so that I'm more comfortable in it, and I plan to be out in my everyday life fairly soon. But I don't want to live as a man or as a woman, and that's okay.

[Vassenor]

So are you saying my identity is invalid because I only realised when I was 14?

[United Socialist Republic of Antarctica]

I would disagree that you should only transition if you have deep-seated, horrible dysphoria. I mean, yes, if you do have really bad dysphoria obviously you should transition, but even if you don't, as long as you feel that your quality of life would improve with transition, you should just go ahead and do it. No one else can decide for you what your gender is, or what modifications you should make to your body. That's all up to you.

And when you're trying to figure out your gender, honestly, throw out everything you know about gender roles and stereotypes. Gender expression has nothing to do with gender identity. You don't have to be feminine to be a woman, you don't have to be masculine to be a man. Gender goes deeper than that.

And you don't have to have experienced dysphoria from an early age for your feelings now to be valid, either. My dysphoria started when I reached puberty, and I only realised I was trans when I was 16. That doesn't take away the fact that I am trans, that I do have dysphoria, and that transition is the best option for me.

Also, you don't necessarily have to be a man or a woman. You really don't have to choose one or the other. When I first started experiencing dysphoria, I explored my gender. But the thing is, I couldn't decide whether I would rather be a boy or a girl, and I buried my feelings. They resurfaced once I discovered non-binary gender, and now I happily identify as non-binary. I plan to take hormones to alter my body, so that I'm more comfortable in it, and I plan to be out in my everyday life fairly soon. But I don't want to live as a man or as a woman, and that's okay.

I wish I had seen this 3 years ago

[The Lunar Surface]

Going to a doctor to ask them if you're trans? WAW O_o

I remember the days (waw I'm sooooooo old xD) that doctors would only help you if you knew and felt the magical words XDDD

The magical words being: "I am a girl" not: "I want to be a girl" or "I feel like a girl" but "I AM A GIRL", because the 2 other sentences were HUGE red lights back in the day of transitional gate keeping (Especially "I want to be a girl" because it indicates that the person who says this, doesn't actually experience themselves as a girl, but desires to be one for ulterior reasons that exist outside of an inner experience of being)

Tera, you don't need to be a girl to be allowed to shave your legs or get laser. Many men shave their arms and legs and get laser, it's nothing to be ashamed about. Only transition if you have a permanent deep seeded experience of non-belonging in your body. If being experienced by everyone around you as male gives you a feeling of anxiousness, panic and sadness. If you look in the mirror and you feel that that isn't you. If the most inner, most fundamental parts of your inside tell you: "I AM a girl, this body isn't right, it's NOT ME!!!". If throughout all of your life you've had these feelings of non-belonging, of lack of self identification with your own body, etc.

I'm not telling you: "Don't transition" I'm telling you: "Explore your feelings, explore in what way you feel you are suffering and try to relate those feelings with past events and past experiences you've had. You don't suddenly become transgender, it's something you're born as, so most likely you might find dysphoric attacks you've had throughout all of your life."

I've had them since early teenaged years, never had them as a child. Materialistic wise, I am not a girl, I feel like I should be a girl but materialistically I am not one yet. Fuck. I've even tried to drinking it away but it doesn't work.

Then you won't need a therapist to tell you if you're trans or not, because you already know the answer, you just need the therapist to give you permission to transition

[The Serbian Empire]

I would disagree that you should only transition if you have deep-seated, horrible dysphoria. I mean, yes, if you do have really bad dysphoria obviously you should transition, but even if you don't, as long as you feel that your quality of life would improve with transition, you should just go ahead and do it. No one else can decide for you what your gender is, or what modifications you should make to your body. That's all up to you.

And when you're trying to figure out your gender, honestly, throw out everything you know about gender roles and stereotypes. Gender expression has nothing to do with gender identity. You don't have to be feminine to be a woman, you don't have to be masculine to be a man. Gender goes deeper than that.

And you don't have to have experienced dysphoria from an early age for your feelings now to be valid, either. My dysphoria started when I reached puberty, and I only realised I was trans when I was 16. That doesn't take away the fact that I am trans, that I do have dysphoria, and that transition is the best option for me.

Also, you don't necessarily have to be a man or a woman. You really don't have to choose one or the other. When I first started experiencing dysphoria, I explored my gender. But the thing is, I couldn't decide whether I would rather be a boy or a girl, and I buried my feelings. They resurfaced once I discovered non-binary gender, and now I happily identify as non-binary. I plan to take hormones to alter my body, so that I'm more comfortable in it, and I plan to be out in my everyday life fairly soon. But I don't want to live as a man or as a woman, and that's okay.

For me, the dysphoria has only worsened with time to the point I've increased my intensity to learn how to drive.

[Hetalia Dakota 2 II]

So are you saying my identity is invalid because I only realised when I was 14?

I always have felt bad myself as I've known since I was around 4 and have a very conventional story despite not appearing or acting conventional people tend to have ways to cut everyone deep.

[Frenline Delpha]

This is a question Imve had festering for a long time. Now, I get that gender and sex aren't the same thing. That I understand. However, I must ask, if there are more than two genders, what are they? And I'd like my answer without the whole "gender is a social construct" thing please. I've heard that enough that it plays in the elevators of my personal hell. Also, I am not including non-binary because that, by definition, means that you don't choose a gender. I appreciate any straightforward answers I get, so thanks in advance.

[The Serbian Empire]

This is a question Imve had festering for a long time. Now, I get that gender and sex aren't the same thing. That I understand. However, I must ask, if there are more than two genders, what are they? And I'd like my answer without the whole "gender is a social construct" thing please. I've heard that enough that it plays in the elevators of my personal hell. Also, I am not including non-binary because that, by definition, means that you don't choose a gender. I appreciate any straightforward answers I get, so thanks in advance.

In some Native American tribes, India, Pakistan, Thailand, and Samoa there are individuals who identify as a third gender. Kathoey, and fa'afafine would be prime examples of such.

[Nature-Spirits]

This is a question Imve had festering for a long time. Now, I get that gender and sex aren't the same thing. That I understand. However, I must ask, if there are more than two genders, what are they? And I'd like my answer without the whole "gender is a social construct" thing please. I've heard that enough that it plays in the elevators of my personal hell. Also, I am not including non-binary because that, by definition, means that you don't choose a gender. I appreciate any straightforward answers I get, so thanks in advance.

Well, if we tried to list every point on the gender spectrum and every gender label, it'd be a pretty massive fucking list. However, in general, there are people who are between or a mix of male and female, people who don't identify with any aspect of maleness or femaleness, and people who don't identify with any gender at all. You could find a bunch of labels to describe each of those. Some fairly common ones are androgyne, neutrois, and agender respectively, although none of those labels truly has a single, fixed definition. Genderfluid describes someone whose gender changes over time. Meanwhile, non-binary and genderqueer can each be used to describe any one of those things.

And how is non-binary not included, if I may ask? It is not, as you claim, "not choosing a gender". I mean, leaving aside the fact that no one really chooses their gender, non-binary simply indicates any gender that is not binary, "by definition" -- the binary genders being, of course, male and female.

And, of course, as Marisa/Serb has said, many non-Western cultures have traditionally recognised people who do not fulfil those cultures' conceptions of the male or female genders.


By the way, why are you so opposed to the idea that gender is a social construct? You don't have to get into it if you'd rather not, but I'm curious. I've seen evidence for it being, to a degree, neurologically, culturally, and personally based, so I would posit that it's at least in part a social construct.

[The Serbian Empire]

This is a question Imve had festering for a long time. Now, I get that gender and sex aren't the same thing. That I understand. However, I must ask, if there are more than two genders, what are they? And I'd like my answer without the whole "gender is a social construct" thing please. I've heard that enough that it plays in the elevators of my personal hell. Also, I am not including non-binary because that, by definition, means that you don't choose a gender. I appreciate any straightforward answers I get, so thanks in advance.

Well, if we tried to list every point on the gender spectrum and every gender label, it'd be a pretty massive fucking list. However, in general, there are people who are between or a mix of male and female, people who don't identify with any aspect of maleness or femaleness, and people who don't identify with any gender at all. You could find a bunch of labels to describe each of those. Some fairly common ones are androgyne, neutrois, and agender respectively, although none of those labels truly has a single, fixed definition. Genderfluid describes someone whose gender changes over time. Meanwhile, non-binary and genderqueer can each be used to describe any one of those things.

And how is non-binary not included, if I may ask? It is not, as you claim, "not choosing a gender". I mean, leaving aside the fact that no one really chooses their gender, non-binary simply indicates any gender that is not binary, "by definition" -- the binary genders being, of course, male and female.

And, of course, as Marisa/Serb has said, many non-Western cultures have traditionally recognised people who do not fulfil those cultures' conceptions of the male or female genders.


By the way, why are you so opposed to the idea that gender is a social construct? You don't have to get into it if you'd rather not, but I'm curious. I've seen evidence for it being, to a degree, neurologically, culturally, and personally based, so I would posit that it's at least in part a social construct.

There's even third genders in parts of Europe including Italy along with the Balkans Sworn Virgins who are usually assigned as female at birth. The only thing known for certain about femminiello and their gender status is that they're definitely gender non-conforming for AMABs.

[Philjia]

This is a question Imve had festering for a long time. Now, I get that gender and sex aren't the same thing. That I understand. However, I must ask, if there are more than two genders, what are they? And I'd like my answer without the whole "gender is a social construct" thing please. I've heard that enough that it plays in the elevators of my personal hell. Also, I am not including non-binary because that, by definition, means that you don't choose a gender. I appreciate any straightforward answers I get, so thanks in advance.

In basic terms, there are three umbrella terms that broadly cover most identities other than male or female:
Androgynes are at a roughly fixed point between them.
Gender fluid people change how male or female they feel relatively frequently.
Agender people feel they are neither male nor female.

[Westacara]

I will make this clear, I DO NOT treat transgenders or homosexuals differently then other people (as long as they don't hit on me). However, I am against both, not just because my religion thinks so, but because I myself thinks so as well.
Transgender and homosexuals is anti-creation, and slows down the population growth, it ruins the roles in the family. Though the Father and Mother can both become employed or stay home, they are both made to perfect home and family care, and work twice as well with a faithful, helpful spouse of the opposite gender. Males and females are proven to have different personalities and emotional levels, such as empathy, caring, and sensitivity for a Mother, and the Father is usually a little more disciplinary, and protective, however it is, good marriages between a male and a female balance eachother out and are more likely for success, and happiness. The book of Genesis in the Bible has many chapter that explain the importance of male-female marriage. Marriage and family is the most important thing to God, and science has proven why. Isiah once predicted that humanity would get confused by their gender. Sound ridiculous? You got that right, it is, and it is real!
Thank you for reading and I hope I have not offended anybody, but enlightened, feel free to message me with your curiosities of my religion and beliefs, or your side of the story. (Note I am usually on once every few days).

[Philjia]

I will make this clear, I DO NOT treat transgenders or homosexuals differently then other people (as long as they don't hit on me). However, I am against both, not just because my religion thinks so, but because I myself thinks so as well.
Transgender and homosexuals is anti-creation, and slows down the population growth, it ruins the roles in the family. Though the Father and Mother can both become employed or stay home, they are both made to perfect home and family care, and work twice as well with a faithful, helpful spouse of the opposite gender. Males and females are proven to have different personalities and emotional levels, such as empathy, caring, and sensitivity for a Mother, and the Father is usually a little more disciplinary, and protective, however it is, good marriages between a male and a female balance eachother out and are more likely for success, and happiness. The book of Genesis in the Bible has many chapter that explain the importance of male-female marriage. Marriage and family is the most important thing to God, and science has proven why. Isiah once predicted that humanity would get confused by their gender. Sound ridiculous? You got that right, it is, and it is real!
Thank you for reading and I hope I have not offended anybody, but enlightened, feel free to message me with your curiosities of my religion and beliefs, or your side of the story. (Note I am usually on once every few days).

I think if your god is not using the harm principle he's a pretty shit god. That is, if he's placing the so called sanctity of marriage above human welfare he is a wholly unworthy individual and can indeed shove his moralising firmly into his divine anal cavity.

[Aphryss]

The problem with arguments from religion is that they're only relevant to people who share your specific religious beliefs. I mean, as an atheist, it's about as valid an argument as telling me about the role of transgender people in your 1000-page fanfic epic Harry Potter and the Curse of Dysphoria. Even for Christians, there's enough different interpretations of Christianity that there's no need for transgender Christians to subscribe to a version in which their god does not have their health and happiness in mind.

Personally, I do not think that refusing to accept and cherish transgender people for who they are is compatible with the biblical command to love one's neighbour. But that's just me.

[Nature-Spirits]

I don't even read these rambling transphobic posts anymore, tbh. I've encountered far too many to care at this point.

Harry Potter and the Curse of Dysphoria

But can this please be a thing.

[Aphryss]

I don't even read these rambling transphobic posts anymore, tbh. I've encountered far too many to care at this point.

Harry Potter and the Curse of Dysphoria

But can this please be a thing.

If you write it, sure! I'm occasionally tempted to write Harry Potter fanfic, but then I remember I'd need to read the entire series again first, and I don't actually own the first one. I wouldn't be surprised if fanfic featuring LGBT+ characters already exists, though. In fact, I'm pretty sure it does, at least if you count "Harry and Draco fuck" as LGBT+. Fanfic featuring specifically trans characters, who knows? It's probably out there, but I don't particularly want to wade through the depths of the internet to find it.

[Nature-Spirits]

I don't even read these rambling transphobic posts anymore, tbh. I've encountered far too many to care at this point.


But can this please be a thing.

If you write it, sure! I'm occasionally tempted to write Harry Potter fanfic, but then I remember I'd need to read the entire series again first, and I don't actually own the first one. I wouldn't be surprised if fanfic featuring LGBT+ characters already exists, though. In fact, I'm pretty sure it does, at least if you count "Harry and Draco fuck" as LGBT+. Fanfic featuring specifically trans characters, who knows? It's probably out there, but I don't particularly want to wade through the depths of the internet to find it.

Yeah, I have a friend who reads a lot of Harry Potter fanfic, and she's told me all about her favourite pairings. Many of them are same-sex.

As for specifically trans characters, there's a lot of fanfic out there like that. Most of it features characters who are headcanoned as trans, which is still fine by me. I just like being able to read erotica that features trans people.

[Shonburg]

If you write it, sure! I'm occasionally tempted to write Harry Potter fanfic, but then I remember I'd need to read the entire series again first, and I don't actually own the first one. I wouldn't be surprised if fanfic featuring LGBT+ characters already exists, though. In fact, I'm pretty sure it does, at least if you count "Harry and Draco fuck" as LGBT+. Fanfic featuring specifically trans characters, who knows? It's probably out there, but I don't particularly want to wade through the depths of the internet to find it.

Yeah, I have a friend who reads a lot of Harry Potter fanfic, and she's told me all about her favourite pairings. Many of them are same-sex.

As for specifically trans characters, there's a lot of fanfic out there like that. Most of it features characters who are headcanoned as trans, which is still fine by me. I just like being able to read erotica that features trans people.

*Ahem* Could a be tg'd a link to such things?

[Nature-Spirits]

Yeah, I have a friend who reads a lot of Harry Potter fanfic, and she's told me all about her favourite pairings. Many of them are same-sex.

As for specifically trans characters, there's a lot of fanfic out there like that. Most of it features characters who are headcanoned as trans, which is still fine by me. I just like being able to read erotica that features trans people.

*Ahem* Could a be tg'd a link to such things?

Try going to a fanfic site like Archive Of Our Own, and put "trans" or "transgender" as one of the search terms.

[Shonburg]

*Ahem* Could a be tg'd a link to such things?

Try going to a fanfic site like Archive Of Our Own, and put "trans" or "transgender" as one of the search terms.

kk!

[Greater Orensta]

So today someone told me that the white bar on the trans flag actually symbolizes how no one will ever be able to change their gender, so they are trapped in the body God gave them whether they were mentally unstable or not, This was so stupid i almost killed myself writing it

[Nariterrr]

So today someone told me that the white bar on the trans flag actually symbolizes how no one will ever be able to change their gender, so they are trapped in the body God gave them whether they were mentally unstable or not, This was so stupid i almost killed myself writing it

Some people are dumb.