What would you change about history?

by **Greater Mackonia** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 12:11 pm

The Wolven League wrote:
Greater Mackonia wrote:
Well I don't have anything against any of them personally, they were all very intelligent people, I just think they led thought down the wrong path. It was partly facetious.

Eh, fair enough. Why would you spare Wittgenstein, though?

He was one of the greatest genii who ever lived.

Actually now that you've got me thinking maybe Foucault and Derrida could be arranged to die in fires as well.

by **Nationes Pii Redivivi** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 12:15 pm

Greater Mackonia wrote:
The Wolven League wrote:Eh, fair enough. Why would you spare Wittgenstein, though?

He was one of the greatest genii who ever lived.

Actually now that you've got me thinking maybe Foucault and Derrida could be arranged to die in fires as well.

So you want to kill all the philosophers? Except Wittgenstein.

You know, I'd start with Plato, work my way chronologically, sparing, along the way, Bergson, Hegel, and Berkeley, because they were the three names I drew out of my hat.

by **Greater Mackonia** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 12:17 pm

Nationes Pii Redivivi wrote:
Greater Mackonia wrote:
He was one of the greatest genii who ever lived.

Actually now that you've got me thinking maybe Foucault and Derrida could be arranged to die in fires as well.

So you want to kill all the philosophers? Except Wittgenstein.

You know, I'd start with Plato, work my way chronologically, sparing, along the way, Bergson, Hegel, and Berkeley, because they were the three names I drew out of my hat.

How does the Vienna Circle, Foucault and Derrida equate to all philosophers?

by **Infected Mushroom** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 1:01 pm

I would change history so that France defeats Germany in FIFA last season and goes on to take the cup against Argentina.

by **Husseinarti** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 1:43 pm

Conscentia wrote:I've made some amendments to my previous answer...
First set of changes:
Prevent the murder of Archimedes; save the Antikythera mechanics from getting sunk; save the library of Alexandria.

If permitted by the conditions of this hypothetical also:
Have the printing press, Newtonian telescope, optical microscope, and navigational compass invented during the reign of Marcus Aurelius in the Roman Empire.

The following changes are applied if still applicable to history:
Delay the death of Marcus Aurelius by at least 1 year; prevent the birth of King David, prevent Commodus from becoming Roman Emperor.

The following changes are applied if still applicable to history:
End the War of 1812 in decisive British victory, prevent Ada Lovelace suffering uterine cancer, delay the death of Ada Lovelace by at least 30 years, complete the Analytical Engine.

The following changes are applied if still applicable to history:
Prevent the birth of Stalin, delay the death of Nikola Tesla by at least 7 years, complete the Wardenclyffe Tower.

... Then fix whatever I broke doing all that.

Did I miss anything?

Just give the entire surface web to the Roman Empire.

Lets see how well the Germanic tribesmen fair as the IX Air Assault Cohort and the Attack Helicopter Equites Legionis, all from the II Air-Landing Legion sudden rain down on them in UH-1 Hueys and Mi-28s.

by **The Wolven League** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 2:09 pm

Husseinarti wrote:
Conscentia wrote:I've made some amendments to my previous answer...
First set of changes:
Prevent the murder of Archimedes; save the Antikythera mechanics from getting sunk; save the library of Alexandria.

If permitted by the conditions of this hypothetical also:
Have the printing press, Newtonian telescope, optical microscope, and navigational compass invented during the reign of Marcus Aurelius in the Roman Empire.

The following changes are applied if still applicable to history:
Delay the death of Marcus Aurelius by at least 1 year; prevent the birth of King David, prevent Commodus from becoming Roman Emperor.

The following changes are applied if still applicable to history:
End the War of 1812 in decisive British victory, prevent Ada Lovelace suffering uterine cancer, delay the death of Ada Lovelace by at least 30 years, complete the Analytical Engine.

The following changes are applied if still applicable to history:
Prevent the birth of Stalin, delay the death of Nikola Tesla by at least 7 years, complete the Wardenclyffe Tower.

... Then fix whatever I broke doing all that.

Did I miss anything?

Just give the entire surface web to the Roman Empire.

Lets see how well the Germanic tribesmen fair as the IX Air Assault Cohort and the Attack Helicopter Equites Legionis, all from the II Air-Landing Legion sudden rain down on them in UH-1 Hueys and Mi-28s.

My money is on the Germanics.

by **Artzstotska II** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 9:05 pm

Make the Canaanites turn away from their wickedness, and thus the Israelites won't have to eradicate them.

by **Nationes Pii Redivivi** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 9:10 pm

Greater Mackonia wrote:
Nationes Pii Redivivi wrote:
So you want to kill all the philosophers? Except Wittgenstein.

You know, I'd start with Plato, work my way chronologically, sparing, along the way, Bergson, Hegel, and Berkeley, because they were the three names I drew out of my hat.

How does the Vienna Circle, Foucault and Derrida equate to all philosophers?

Why, then, the random assortment of philosophers, killing Foucault, Derrida, the Vienna Circle, and all that? I mean, Hegel didn't make the list, and I would imagine anyone who had to read him would like to see him offed before he can set pen to paper- or, at least, instructed him on how to write coherently.

by **Confederation of Common Sense** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 9:29 pm

Everyone's last name will end in -strom, -quist, -sen, -son, -i, and -en.

(A universal Scandinavian world government)

by **The Black Forrest** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 9:59 pm

I would prevent Barney from ever making it to the airwaves.

by **Berinnica** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 10:01 pm

I've got it now, make it so everyone said Jesuses name as Yesus Christ.

by **Rusozak** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 10:02 pm

I would have history play out like my latest civ5 game: Have the world ruled by the Dutch with an iron fist from the holy city of Amsterdam.

by **Berinnica** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 10:03 pm

Rusozak wrote:I would have history play out like my latest civ5 game: Have the world ruled by the Dutch with an iron fist from the holy city of Amsterdam.

Would "Yesus Christ" be a common phrase?

by **Atomic Utopia** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 10:20 pm

Have peaceful nuclear reactors developed first... in the roman empire during the first century B.C.

Imagine how much more interesting the world would be.

by **Confederation of Common Sense** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 10:26 pm

Make sure David Fucking Arquette doesn't win the World Title
Abort the fetus of Vince Russo
Erase John Cena's 24891723447466588427282868257 world title victories from history instead of Hulk Hogan or Chris Benoit
Undertaker is 23-0
Vince McMahon gets busted for steroids
Triple H's Reign of Terror ends at WM 19
The Shockmaster doesn't trip over like a fucking idiot
The Invasion angle features Flair, Sting, Goldberg, Hogan, etc.

These changes in history would have prevented the WWE and WCW (now owned by WWE) from being in the shithole that it's in today.

by **Artzstotska II** » Mon Sep 14, 2015 10:34 pm

Destroy all fanatics of all kinds

by **Meryuma** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 1:01 am

Arcturus Novus wrote:
The Nuclear Fist wrote:>proper language
>english

Lol

It wouldn't even be modern English. It'd be the old, disgusting, pre-Norman English.

Yes, tell me more. Ic wille cennan hƿæt þu eart sprecende.

Mattantia wrote:-snip-

Literally supporting rape. NS Summer has gone on too fucking long.

by **Count Thurisaz** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 1:48 am

The Christianization of the Earth. I'd make it never happen.

by **The Wolven League** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 3:55 am

Meryuma wrote:
Arcturus Novus wrote:It wouldn't even be modern English. It'd be the old, disgusting, pre-Norman English.

Yes, tell me more. Ic wille cennan hƿæt þu eart sprecende.

Mattantia wrote:-snip-

Literally supporting rape. NS Summer has gone on too fucking long.

Shh, let it continue!

It's quite entertaining when ten year olds come to this site and be edgy.

by **The Nuclear Fist** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 4:12 am

Make sure the Atomic Age never ends.

by **Finland SSR** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 11:14 am

The Nuclear Fist wrote:Make sure the Atomic Age never ends.

Wait, it's already over?

by **Genivaria** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 11:28 am

The Nuclear Fist wrote:Make sure the Atomic Age never ends.

Yeah lets go full AtomPunk Fallout style.

by **Genivaria** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 11:30 am

Just to be a bit different I'd have the Republic of Carthage win the Punic Wars against Rome and become the sole power in the Mediterranean.

I wonder what the result would be if a trade-based naval power held dominance instead of an agrarian and conquest based land power.

by **Eol Sha** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 11:31 am

Finland SSR wrote:
The Nuclear Fist wrote:Make sure the Atomic Age never ends.

Wait, it's already over?

Apparently.

In the 21st century, the label of the "Atomic Age" connotes either a sense of nostalgia or naïveté, and is considered by many to have ended with the fall of the Soviet Union in 1991, though the term continues to be used by many historians to describe the era following the conclusion of the Second World War. Atomic energy and weapons continue to have a strong effect on world politics in the 21st century. The term is used by some science fiction fans to describe not only the era following the conclusion of the Second World War but also contemporary history up to the present day.

by **The Wolven League** » Tue Sep 15, 2015 12:33 pm

Genivaria wrote:Just to be a bit different I'd have the Republic of Carthage win the Punic Wars against Rome and become the sole power in the Mediterranean.

I wonder what the result would be if a trade-based naval power held dominance instead of an agrarian and conquest based land power.

I agree, it would be very interesting to see how different the world would be.

What would you change about history?

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