The Dating thread

[Mollary]

It was just very sad really, a retelling of difficult lives really, they'd both just been through a lot.

Ah, no wonder it was overwhelming.

Yeah, I guess the thing is, I thought people my age would only have one or two massively traumatic things going on in their lives, but it went much further.

What about your person? What sort of reaction did they provoke? Did you see them afterwards?

[Galloism]

For anyone who wants to reply: what was the hardest thing to you about dating? For me it was always that first date. It was nerve wracking. Second and third dates with the same person weren't so bad, but that first time was always difficult for me. I'd guess it was no picnic for the other person either.

For me, the hardest thing is getting that first date.

I would always just show up naked and it would work wonders.

You know the axe body spray commercials? That's me, but the clothes and the cans of axe are photoshopped in later.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

Why do you think this is happening?

It could be his habit of putting his head down and charging the person.

Well, getting rammed is not always pleasant.

Ah, no wonder it was overwhelming.

Yeah, I guess the thing is, I thought people my age would only have one or two massively traumatic things going on in their lives, but it went much further.

What about your person? What sort of reaction did they provoke? Did you see them afterwards?

Mostly fear. Then incredulity. I did have a second date with him but after we lost touch. I was in the middle of completing my degree and he was working full time. I guess there really wasn't a spark, to sound cliched.

[The Blaatschapen]

For me, the hardest thing is getting that first date.

I would always just show up naked and it would work wonders.

It would work wonders if I were living in warm Alabama like you.

Over here in cold Netherlands, I'm a bit less impressive.

And shivering when naked outside.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

Why do you think this is happening?

I'm not putting any effort into it.

So it's quite logical that it is hard. If you don't even try, then you always fail


Just for the record, I haven't tried in recent times because of other things that took priority (new job, new place, etc.).

Understood. Perhaps once things regain a steady pace you'll find your lady.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

Did you ever asked anyone out?

No, because the girl I wanted to ask out was always taken. So I threw away that idea.

There hasn't been any other girl you'd like to date after her?

[Torisakia]

No, because the girl I wanted to ask out was always taken. So I threw away that idea.

There hasn't been any other girl you'd like to date after her?

Not really.

[Mollary]

Yeah, I guess the thing is, I thought people my age would only have one or two massively traumatic things going on in their lives, but it went much further.

What about your person? What sort of reaction did they provoke? Did you see them afterwards?

Mostly fear. Then incredulity. I did have a second date with him but after we lost touch. I was in the middle of completing my degree and he was working full time. I guess there really wasn't a spark, to sound cliched.

Yes, I think you need to build up trust and a dialogue between you before you delve into personal stuff like that really; I always start out by talking about abstract subjects and hobbies, detached things first. That sounds fair, and it might sound clichéd, but it is true.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

Mostly fear. Then incredulity. I did have a second date with him but after we lost touch. I was in the middle of completing my degree and he was working full time. I guess there really wasn't a spark, to sound cliched.

Yes, I think you need to build up trust and a dialogue between you before you delve into personal stuff like that really; I always start out by talking about abstract subjects and hobbies, detached things first. That sounds fair, and it might sound clichéd, but it is true.

Absolutely. It's better to start slow. I often think that if you reveal too much, too fast and early in the dating, the chances for a relationship to develop are reduced by a lot. It's like you don't leave anything to talk about, nothing to discover.

There hasn't been any other girl you'd like to date after her?

Not really.

Why do you think this has happened? You're young yet.

[Torisakia]

Not really.

Why do you think this has happened? You're young yet.

Because I don't really find anyone aesthetically attractive. Even now I find the girl I wanted to date unattractive.

[Ethel mermania]

For anyone who wants to reply: what was the hardest thing to you about dating? For me it was always that first date. It was nerve wracking. Second and third dates with the same person weren't so bad, but that first time was always difficult for me. I'd guess it was no picnic for the other person either.

if it wasnt meeting someone and just hitting it off, the time period between deciding "hey i want to ask that girl out" and asking her. in 75% of the folks i asked out, i already had a repore with them so there wasnt any nervousness in talking to them, just finding the right time to ask and being afraid to find out what happened if they said no.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

For anyone who wants to reply: what was the hardest thing to you about dating? For me it was always that first date. It was nerve wracking. Second and third dates with the same person weren't so bad, but that first time was always difficult for me. I'd guess it was no picnic for the other person either.

if it wasnt meeting someone and just hitting it off, the time period between deciding "hey i want to ask that girl out" and asking her. in 75% of the folks i asked out, i already had a repore with them so there wasnt any nervousness in talking to them, just finding the right time to ask and being afraid to find out what happened if they said no.

Perhaps the difference here was that these were people I didn't have more than a passing acquaintance with, unlike you. Maybe that's what made that first date so nerve wracking for me.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

Why do you think this has happened? You're young yet.

Because I don't really find anyone aesthetically attractive. Even now I find the girl I wanted to date unattractive.

That's drastic, but I guess I understand.

[Ethel mermania]

Did you ever asked anyone out?

No, because the girl I wanted to ask out was always taken. So I threw away that idea.

mrs mermania was "taken" before we started dating.

[Chocolate Dreams]

Why do you think this has happened? You're young yet.

Because I don't really find anyone aesthetically attractive. Even now I find the girl I wanted to date unattractive.

Mayhap you need to broaden your horizons, lol, idk what i'm saying. Anyway, my point is, maybe you need to look more, heck the girl of your dreams could be living next to you! ( Hopefully it is not an old lady )

[Torisakia]

Because I don't really find anyone aesthetically attractive. Even now I find the girl I wanted to date unattractive.

That's drastic, but I guess I understand.

That's just how I see things. The idea of spending time with someone else besides myself, in a serious manner, scares me.

Because I don't really find anyone aesthetically attractive. Even now I find the girl I wanted to date unattractive.

Mayhap you need to broaden your horizons, lol, idk what i'm saying. Anyway, my point is, maybe you need to look more, heck the girl of your dreams could be living next to you! ( Hopefully it is not an old lady )

I threw away the idea of dating months ago. Had this been March, I would've probably take your advice.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

That's drastic, but I guess I understand.

That's just how I see things. The idea of spending time with someone else besides myself, in a serious manner, scares me.

Maybe what you're scared of is the rejection. I think that could color our perceptions of a relationship, but that's just my opinion. It can be wrong.

[Torisakia]

That's just how I see things. The idea of spending time with someone else besides myself, in a serious manner, scares me.

Maybe what you're scared of is the rejection. I think that could color our perceptions of a relationship, but that's just my opinion. It can be wrong.

It's not rejection I'm scared of (I couldn't care less if someone doesn't want me), it's the idea of being around a completely different person other than myself. If that makes sense.

[Ethel mermania]

if it wasnt meeting someone and just hitting it off, the time period between deciding "hey i want to ask that girl out" and asking her. in 75% of the folks i asked out, i already had a repore with them so there wasnt any nervousness in talking to them, just finding the right time to ask and being afraid to find out what happened if they said no.

Perhaps the difference here was that these were people I didn't have more than a passing acquaintance with, unlike you. Maybe that's what made that first date so nerve wracking for me.

maybe but i enjoy job interviews, so i always found a first date when i didnt know the person, fun and interesting.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

Perhaps the difference here was that these were people I didn't have more than a passing acquaintance with, unlike you. Maybe that's what made that first date so nerve wracking for me.

maybe but i enjoy job interviews, so i always found a first date when i didnt know the person, fun and interesting.

I hate job interviews. It's difficult for me to read the interviewer.

[Galloism]

I would always just show up naked and it would work wonders.

It would work wonders if I were living in warm Alabama like you.

Over here in cold Netherlands, I'm a bit less impressive.

And shivering when naked outside.

1) I don't live in Alabama.

2) I made a fantastic off-color joke for this post, but, after laughing, Nana advised it was not nationstates appropriate. Such a pity.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

Maybe what you're scared of is the rejection. I think that could color our perceptions of a relationship, but that's just my opinion. It can be wrong.

It's not rejection I'm scared of (I couldn't care less if someone doesn't want me), it's the idea of being around a completely different person other than myself. If that makes sense.

I'm not sure I understand. Would it scare you less if the person was just like you, in liking the same things and thinking similarly to you? Or is this a deep fear of other people in general?

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

It would work wonders if I were living in warm Alabama like you.

Over here in cold Netherlands, I'm a bit less impressive.

And shivering when naked outside.

1) I don't live in Alabama.

2) I made a fantastic off-color joke for this post, but, after laughing, Nana advised it was not nationstates appropriate. Such a pity.

It was funny. Wrong, but funny.

[Torisakia]

It's not rejection I'm scared of (I couldn't care less if someone doesn't want me), it's the idea of being around a completely different person other than myself. If that makes sense.

I'm not sure I understand. Would it scare you less if the person was just like you, in liking the same things and thinking similarly to you? Or is this a deep fear of other people in general?

A deep fear of other people just in general. It's also why I don't like the idea of marriage.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

I'm not sure I understand. Would it scare you less if the person was just like you, in liking the same things and thinking similarly to you? Or is this a deep fear of other people in general?

A deep fear of other people just in general. It's also why I don't like the idea of marriage.

Don't get this the wrong way but, have tried talking to a health care professional about this fear?