Does the friend-zone exist?

[Tahar Joblis]

If you think sex cannot be explicitly sold as a service without engaging in wrongdoing, you are, in actual fact, ideologically sex-negative.

Well, depending on the jurisdiction...

And just as an aside, prostitution is NOT legal in Vegas.
*grumbles some about that*

Well, I'm talking about moral wrongdoing, and so, I'm pretty sure, is Freelanderness.

There are times and places where what I said about not being allowed to force someone to dig a ditch at gunpoint wasn't, strictly speaking, a true statement about legal wrongdoing...

[New haven america]

One friend has romantic feeling's for another friend, but the but the friend the person is interesting does something like "I just want to be friends" or "I don't want this(Friendship) to go away"

So you were mostly right.

The 'friend-zone', objectively, only says that unreciprocation is necessary; rejection isn't necessary for unreciprocation.

I know, I just didn't put that part in there.

[New Nassrau]

Okay, this.... "friend-zone" is ridiculous. Yes, I understand some boys can be heartbroken by girls... but some girls simply don't have the same feelings for guys! Its as simple as that! We girls all aren't actively plotting who to friend-zone next or anything! It takes two to date, and if a girl doesn't like you, then tough luck

[New haven america]

Okay, this.... "friend-zone" is ridiculous. Yes, I understand some boys can be heartbroken by girls... but some girls simply don't have the same feelings for guys! Its as simple as that! We girls all aren't actively plotting who to friend-zone next or anything! It takes two to date, and if a girl doesn't like you, then tough luck

The bolded is a definition of the friend-zone.
Girl's can be friend-zoned too.

[Avenio]

Don't pretend that the "literary canon" is uniform over the past 2000 years. Or that norms don't change.

Unrequited love is one of those really, really old, nigh-universal themes for poets and writers to riff off of. I can say with a fair degree of confidence that where there is literature, there is a tradition of literature talking about male unrequited love.

Moreover, the norms haven't changed nearly enough in the last few centuries to be able to draw anything like the line in the sand you're constructing.

The labeling en masse of the "friend zone" as "creepy" is very new, as is the phrase "friend zone." The en masse labeling of male sexuality as "creepy" is comparatively new.

Don't equate the 'friendzone' with unrequited love, nor with male sexuality in general. As you say, the 'friendzone' is a new concept, coming with new connotation seperate from the broader spectrum of unrequited love.

Being sad or upset at the fact that someone doesn't love you back isn't sad or creepy in and of itself, it's just a part of human social interaction. It's what you describe that feeling and your relationship with the person who doesn't love you that the creepiness comes in.

[Olthar]

The "friend zone" only exists in the minds of chauvinistic, possessive men who can't accept that women have wills of our own and aren't required to fuck them just because they're nice.

Given the variety in definitions of it, that's a bit of an unfair generalization. The views of it go from "My romantic feelings for friend X cause situations with them to be awkward", to male chauvinism.

Not really. Just because some guy has an unrequited love, it doesn't mean he's going to go out there bitching and whining about being "friend zoned." Many guys are just going to be mature and accept it without feeling that they have been denied what is "rightfully theirs."

[New haven america]

Given the variety in definitions of it, that's a bit of an unfair generalization. The views of it go from "My romantic feelings for friend X cause situations with them to be awkward", to male chauvinism.

Not really. Just because some guy has an unrequited love, it doesn't mean he's going to go out there bitching and whining about being "friend zoned." Many guys are just going to be mature and accept it without feeling that they have been denied what is "rightfully theirs."

Girls get friend-zoned too...

[United Marxist Nations]

Given the variety in definitions of it, that's a bit of an unfair generalization. The views of it go from "My romantic feelings for friend X cause situations with them to be awkward", to male chauvinism.

Not really. Just because some guy has an unrequited love, it doesn't mean he's going to go out there bitching and whining about being "friend zoned." Many guys are just going to be mature and accept it without feeling that they have been denied what is "rightfully theirs."

But, I don't really think that is the set-in-stone definition of the "friend zone". I don't think it's a requirement for the "friend zone" to be accompanied by whining about it.

[New haven america]

Not really. Just because some guy has an unrequited love, it doesn't mean he's going to go out there bitching and whining about being "friend zoned." Many guys are just going to be mature and accept it without feeling that they have been denied what is "rightfully theirs."

But, I don't really think that is the set-in-stone definition of the "friend zone". I don't think it's a requirement for the "friend zone" to be accompanied by whining about it.

This^

[Olthar]

Not really. Just because some guy has an unrequited love, it doesn't mean he's going to go out there bitching and whining about being "friend zoned." Many guys are just going to be mature and accept it without feeling that they have been denied what is "rightfully theirs."

Girls get friend-zoned too...

And if they bitch and whine about it, they're being possessive, too.

[Olthar]

Not really. Just because some guy has an unrequited love, it doesn't mean he's going to go out there bitching and whining about being "friend zoned." Many guys are just going to be mature and accept it without feeling that they have been denied what is "rightfully theirs."

But, I don't really think that is the set-in-stone definition of the "friend zone". I don't think it's a requirement for the "friend zone" to be accompanied by whining about it.

It's a label, not an intrinsic fact of existence. Something is only a "friend zone" if it's called as such, and mature adults tend not to use such immature and possessive labels. The "friend zone" walks hand-in-hand with complaining because the people who use the label are the ones who complain about it.

[The Merchant Republics]

Err, no, not necessarily. So sayeth the last 2000 years of the literary canon from pretty much every culture on the face of the planet.

Don't pretend that the "literary canon" is uniform over the past 2000 years. Or that norms don't change.

The labeling en masse of the "friend zone" as "creepy" is very new, as is the phrase "friend zone." The en masse labeling of male sexuality as "creepy" is comparatively new.

The concept of not just kidnapping the woman you want from her family and binding her until she doesn't run away any more, frankly is a relatively new concept. The rape of the Sabines (largely mythological as it may have been) was closer to us then the construction of the pyramids.

[Greed and Death]

Not really. Just because some guy has an unrequited love, it doesn't mean he's going to go out there bitching and whining about being "friend zoned." Many guys are just going to be mature and accept it without feeling that they have been denied what is "rightfully theirs."

But, I don't really think that is the set-in-stone definition of the "friend zone". I don't think it's a requirement for the "friend zone" to be accompanied by whining about it.

Most of the guys who whine about it do so because the chick is not quite forth right about it. Sometimes phrases like I wish I had a bf like you. To the girl maybe she see the connotation of "like you" implies "not you", to the guy who just heard that he sees that thinks "like you" means "ask me out doofus".

[The Merchant Republics]

But, I don't really think that is the set-in-stone definition of the "friend zone". I don't think it's a requirement for the "friend zone" to be accompanied by whining about it.

Most of the guys who whine about it do so because the chick is not quite forth right about it. Sometimes phrases like I wish I had a bf like you. To the girl maybe she see the connotation of "like you" implies "not you", to the guy who just heard that he sees that thinks "like you" means "ask me out doofus".

Frankly. Yeah.

I mean there's no arguing there aren't people who don't, whether intentionally or unintentionally string other people along aware of their affections, because it feels good to be wanted, but they don't actually want to date said person.

Two of my biggest regrets in life, are doing that to a girl, a really nice girl too, and letting it happen to me all at the same time.

[Astrolinium]

No.

The idea that you're owed a specific type of relationship with somebody is ridiculous.

[Freelanderness]

I am the one running around defending maligned men.

My "friend zone" relationships have generally involved me putting a woman or girl in the "friend zone." And there have been times when I have been seriously tempted to abuse that position of power.

Ah yes. I see you are demonstrating your ethical superiority, and understanding of human relationships. Sorry that I ever doubted your expertise and moral standards.

[Americanada]

No.

The idea that you're owed a specific type of relationship with somebody is ridiculous.

I do have to agree to an extent. However, I think that some of it may be motivated by just teenage-incompetence about relationships or, worse, being afraid to just say to the person that there is infatuation due to some perceived weakness in openly expressing an emotion to somebody.

[The Merchant Republics]

No.

The idea that you're owed a specific type of relationship with somebody is ridiculous.

That's it's a concept largely motivated by egotism and entitlement, does not specifically deny that it is a phenomenon.

[Pacifornia]

I told one of my good friends that I liked her a lot way back on V-day 2013. I made a home-made card and wrote down a poem by Lord Byron along with some candy Setting was wrong since we were waiting for the bus to go shopping (we're not very creative and our area is far from LA) and it was super loud. She basically turned me down saying she didn't feel the right way. At least we're still friends, but I still have a thing for her; I just wish she could someday see I could be more than a friend

[The Steel Magnolia]

Fuck no it doesn't exist.

[Aurora Novus]

Fuck no it doesn't exist.

Whether or not you like a given concept has no bearing on whether or not it's actually a concept. By the very fact that people use the term to describe a specific pehnominon, it is real. The status of unrequited love from someone who wishes to be friends with you is a real status. Hence, friend zone.

[NERVUN]

To address the topic, of course it exists. If you have one person who is interested in another, but that one does not return romantic feelings... ta-dah!

Here's what it is not though:

It is not a worldwide conspiracy by either sex to put 'nice guys' (or gals) in their place. Yes, there are undoubtedly men and women who will string another along for whatever reason, but it is far, far more likely that people simply do not connect that way. Oddly enough you can be friends with someone without being attracted to them; and, again oddly enough, people can have completely different views of their relationship.

It's not an excuse to behave like a jerk, nor is it a romantic dating sim where you earn enough points to unlock the heart of whomever.

So, yes, it does exist because honestly, friendship between people exists and you will end up with one developing feelings from time to time. Sometimes you're REALLY lucky and both end up developing that way. Hell, my wife and I started out as just friends and it wasn't until later that I realized I was interested. Took her a bit longer to admit that she was interested too, so it does happen. The problem becomes one when the lovelorn person is convinced that is HAS to happen, that it MUST happen, and by God if it ain't then it's because the target is stringing them along.

That my friends is the grumping and griping you hear about the friend-zone and why it leaves a bad taste in the mouth.

[Peppyshkys]

Quite simply, yes. It's where one of the two want to be more than friends, but the friend-zone keeps them as friends.

[Trolliverse]

Quite simply, yes. It's where one of the two want to be more than friends, but the friend-zone keeps them as friends.

^THAT.

[NERVUN]

Quite simply, yes. It's where one of the two want to be more than friends, but the friend-zone keeps them as friends.

No... It's the fact that one of the two wants to be more but the other isn't interested that does that.

It's kind of like saying that you run into someone attractive in a bar but s/he (edit for your preference) shoots you down. That's not friend-zone, that's just not being interested.