General Girl Advice

[Solarys]

*C for cat

A lot of us are grown-ups here. You can write "bitch" without worrying about getting yelled at for your language.

Meh. Never hurts to be on the safe side

He was trying to say, "I'm oblivious to humor, satire, and famous pop culture references."

I have a different sense of humor. As for the references, you are right. I have no idea what it is supposed to refer to.

[Farnhamia]

A lot of us are grown-ups here. You can write "bitch" without worrying about getting yelled at for your language.

Meh. Never hurts to be on the safe side

It depends on how big the safe is. Some of those things are incredibly heavy.

[Dyakovo]

A lot of us are grown-ups here. You can write "bitch" without worrying about getting yelled at for your language.

Meh. Never hurts to be on the safe side

Yes, it does. Typing out "bad" words and then substituting in filler characters to self-censor makes you look immature. If you're going to swear, then swear.

[Solarys]

Meh. Never hurts to be on the safe side

Yes, it does. Typing out "bad" words and then substituting in filler characters to self-censor makes you look immature. If you're going to swear, then swear.

I assure you. Appearing immature is not one of my concerns.

[Bottle]

A lot of us are grown-ups here. You can write "bitch" without worrying about getting yelled at for your language.

Meh. Never hurts to be on the safe side

He was trying to say, "I'm oblivious to humor, satire, and famous pop culture references."

I have a different sense of humor. As for the references, you are right. I have no idea what it is supposed to refer to.

Protips:

1) If you're going to "bleep" out letters like a 9-year-old who is scared of being caught using a swear, don't turn around and whine about it if most people respond to you like you're a 9-year-old.

2) If you don't understand something, try asking. You'll look a lot less silly.

3) Everyone has a "different" sense of humor. Being unable to recognize when someone is being serious versus not being serious is an entirely different issue.

4) Go watch A Few Good Men.

[Solarys]

Protips:
1) If you're going to "bleep" out letters like a 9-year-old who is scared of being caught using a swear, don't turn around and whine about it if most people respond to you like you're a 9-year-old.

2) If you don't understand something, try asking. You'll look a lot less silly.

3) Everyone has a "different" sense of humor. Being unable to recognize when someone is being serious versus not being serious is an entirely different issue.

4) Go watch A Few Good Men.

1) Care to give an example of me whining ?
2) Um i did ?
3) Assuming i can't tell or was being serious myself ?
4) That is just about the "you can't handle the truth" part. Anyway already seen it.

Oh and, if humor was your intention maybe, try being actually funny next time, eh ?

[The Blaatschapen]

*C for cat

A lot of us are grown-ups here. You can write "bitch" without worrying about getting yelled at for your language.

I want to be yelled at, bitch

[Surfistan]

Don't vomit on her, ever.
Trust me, it's something they don't forget, and never forgive.

[Stern des Meeres]

Don't vomit on her, ever.
Trust me, it's something they don't forget, and never forgive.

It's usually not a good idea to barf on anyone, ever.

[Solarys]

Don't vomit on her, ever.
Trust me, it's something they don't forget, and never forgive.

I don't consider a person like that worth pursuing.

(Doesn't mean that one should "test" by vomiting on everyone they meet)

[Surfistan]

Don't vomit on her, ever.
Trust me, it's something they don't forget, and never forgive.

It's usually not a good idea to barf on anyone, ever.

Hey, he asked general advice, I gave it.

[Stern des Meeres]

General Girl reporting for duty. I understand that you want answers regarding womankind.

You want the truth from me?

You can't handle the truth.

Son, we live in a world where all vagina-bearing individuals have different interests and opinions, and those interests and opinions have to be suppressed by unceasing sexist pressure to conform. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lieutenant Nice Guy?

I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for the girl who inexplicably wears shoes that make her limp with pain, and you curse the way that all women think they must wait for you to make the first move. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know, that these bullshit behaviors, while irritating as shit, are necessary to maintain the arbitrary sexist divisions between dudes and chicks. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves you time! You don't want the truth, because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me creating cookie-cutter females. You need me creating cookie-cutter females.

We use instruction manuals like "Maxim", "Cosmo", "MTV". We use this popular culture as the backbone of a life spent defending a status quo. You use them as lining for your bird's cage. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very conformity that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it! I would rather you just said "thank you", and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up your phone, and talk to a goddamn woman yourself.

Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.

Have you considered printing this out and framing it?

[Northern Dominus]

Protips:
1) If you're going to "bleep" out letters like a 9-year-old who is scared of being caught using a swear, don't turn around and whine about it if most people respond to you like you're a 9-year-old.

2) If you don't understand something, try asking. You'll look a lot less silly.

3) Everyone has a "different" sense of humor. Being unable to recognize when someone is being serious versus not being serious is an entirely different issue.

4) Go watch A Few Good Men.

1) Care to give an example of me whining ?
2) Um i did ?
3) Assuming i can't tell or was being serious myself ?
4) That is just about the "you can't handle the truth" part. Anyway already seen it.

Oh and, if humor was your intention maybe, try being actually funny next time, eh ?

I thought her whole schtick was pongnient and at least chuckle-worthy. But then again that's because Hurricane Bottle hasn't touched down upon me yet.


Wherereas your mass quotation here:
viewtopic.php?p=16043539#p16043539

Was a bit vague let's say. Not that the "ehmergerd sex is so badz" needed a severe popping, but come on, at least Bottle was on point. And truthful. I mean.. when's the last time anyone here looked at a WNBA player and went "Mmmm, I'd like her to carry my child, she's got superior physical traits", broadly speaking anyway?

[Ethel mermania]

Don't vomit on her, ever.
Trust me, it's something they don't forget, and never forgive.

not necessarily, if they clean you up and take you home, then answer the pone when you call to apologize. that girl is the keeper.

[Bottle]

Protips:
1) If you're going to "bleep" out letters like a 9-year-old who is scared of being caught using a swear, don't turn around and whine about it if most people respond to you like you're a 9-year-old.

2) If you don't understand something, try asking. You'll look a lot less silly.

3) Everyone has a "different" sense of humor. Being unable to recognize when someone is being serious versus not being serious is an entirely different issue.

4) Go watch A Few Good Men.

1) Care to give an example of me whining ?
2) Um i did ?
3) Assuming i can't tell or was being serious myself ?
4) That is just about the "you can't handle the truth" part. Anyway already seen it.

Oh and, if humor was your intention maybe, try being actually funny next time, eh ?

This is fun!

1) Nope!

2) Yes, you very obviously failed to understand something (and you've admitted as much).

2b) I won't speak for anybody else, but I think it was delightfully silly the way you mistook a famous movie reference for "over-dramatic bit*hing."

3) You said you couldn't tell. If you really want to try the whole "I totally knew that, I was joking too!" thing, I mean, you go right ahead and try...

4) Actually the entire post is a direct modification of the whole speech. Maybe watch it again?

Thanks for your helpful advice on how to be funny, though, I'll be sure to make my future work f*ck*ng h*lari*us just for you.

[Solarys]

I thought her whole schtick was pongnient and at least chuckle-worthy. But then again that's because Hurricane Bottle hasn't touched down upon me yet.


Wherereas your mass quotation here:
viewtopic.php?p=16043539#p16043539

Was a bit vague let's say. Not that the "ehmergerd sex is so badz" needed a severe popping, but come on, at least Bottle was on point. And truthful. I mean.. when's the last time anyone here looked at a WNBA player and went "Mmmm, I'd like her to carry my child, she's got superior physical traits", broadly speaking anyway?

Blame Shakespeare for that quote.

Also nothing wrong with having preferences .

[Northern Dominus]

Don't vomit on her, ever.
Trust me, it's something they don't forget, and never forgive.

not necessarily, if they clean you up and take you home, then answer the pone when you call to apologize. that girl is the keeper.

I can't decide if that's sage advice or standard Ethel creepiness seeping in again.

[Kardelia]

Every woman is different unless of course you come from a backward country that still believes women should act a certain way.

I for one like blunt, funny guys. I hate the ones who thinks we're delicate flowers and be treated like some gold trophy. I want to go paintballing and headbanging, god dangit. Give me that bruise, hurt me, yaaaaaaaaaaay.

Then again, I don't have a boyfriend, and have always been boyfriendless.

>tfw no bf

Really, the perfect girl form me , nevertheless I like that you do not want to be treated like a gold trophy because it means you are person who wants respect and deserves to have it.

[Haakopen]

Even I, with my history of shame and embarassment regarding girls have found the courage to actually ask them.

Do the same, though not expect much honesty.

[Solarys]

1) Nope!

2) Yes, you very obviously failed to understand something (and you've admitted as much).

2b) I won't speak for anybody else, but I think it was delightfully silly the way you mistook a famous movie reference for "over-dramatic bit*hing."

3) You said you couldn't tell. If you really want to try the whole "I totally knew that, I was joking too!" thing, I mean, you go right ahead and try...

4) Actually the entire post is a direct modification of the whole speech. Maybe watch it again?

Thanks for your helpful advice on how to be funny, though, I'll be sure to make my future work f*ck*ng h*lari*us just for you.

2) *As in i did ask.

2b), 3), 4) I don't memorise entire movies. All i remember was that one line. Not my fault for that.

And do quote me saying "i couldn't tell".

Also if the last part is true, then thank you. I will be looking forw... oh sarcasm, right...

[Bottle]

Don't vomit on her, ever.
Trust me, it's something they don't forget, and never forgive.

False. My friend Matt barfed on me, and we're still friends years hence. My current partner has barfed near me multiple times, and I'm sure there was spatter on at least a few occasions. My baby brother has barfed on me at least two dozen times, and I still (mostly) like him.

Now, I'm not saying you should go out of your way to puke on someone, just sayin' that context is key. WHY you barf on them, and how you behave afterwards, is important.

[Stern des Meeres]

Every woman is different unless of course you come from a backward country that still believes women should act a certain way.

I for one like blunt, funny guys. I hate the ones who thinks we're delicate flowers and be treated like some gold trophy. I want to go paintballing and headbanging, god dangit. Give me that bruise, hurt me, yaaaaaaaaaaay.

Then again, I don't have a boyfriend, and have always been boyfriendless.

>tfw no bf

Really, the perfect girl form me , nevertheless I like that you do not want to be treated like a gold trophy because it means you are person who wants respect and deserves to have it.

Congrats. You've just won a good person award.

[Solarys]

not necessarily, if they clean you up and take you home, then answer the pone when you call to apologize. that girl is the keeper.

I can't decide if that's sage advice or standard Ethel creepiness seeping in again.

I can back Ethel up on that one.

[Haakopen]

You know I really dont know any girl that appreciates if the boy she talks too is a commanding officer of an airsoft squad in WW2 reeanactments

[Stern des Meeres]

You know I really dont know any girl that appreciates if the boy she talks too is a commanding officer of an airsoft squad in WW2 reeanactments

...I would appreciate that.