Value of virginity and slut-shaming

[Condunum]

What the actual fuck.

WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

Yeah, the vagina is a lady part, and if anyone touches it, it makes the woman gross and dirty and used and eeeewwwww.

I was meaning that the strong view of 'what has been there before matters and devalues my participation' is the issue.

He shouldn't believe that, but you have to actually dig into the problem to find the source. That's why psychologists have so much more success than people on the internet.

Then he needs to go see a fucking psychologist so he can stop being a sexist.

[Condunum]

I was meaning that the strong view of 'what has been there before matters and devalues my participation' is the issue.

He shouldn't believe that, but you have to actually dig into the problem to find the source. That's why psychologists have so much more success than people on the internet.

Then he needs to go see a fucking psychologist so he can stop being a sexist.

Yes, he does. But you being abrasive does not help at all.

[Katganistan]

Why do people insist on thinking someone else's sexuality is any of their fucking business?

[Libertarian California]

What the fuck? How does that make any sense?

Cond babying you isn't going to help you grow the fuck up and realize that you are sexist.

Oh yeah because an NSG forum is really going to help someone "grow da fukk up".

Preference for chastity = sexism?

Okay...whatever you say chief.

[Gauntleted Fist]

Why do people insist on thinking someone else's sexuality is any of their fucking business?

Might wanna check the last page.

[Dyakovo]

Sometimes you need someone to be a cunt so you can get the fuck over yourself.

What the fuck? How does that make any sense?

Someone needs to get your attention, make you get over your self.

[Condunum]

What the fuck? How does that make any sense?

Cond babying you isn't going to help you grow the fuck up and realize that you are sexist.

I'm not babying him. I'm saying "don't be a dick to him, try to talk the problem out of him."

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

Cond babying you isn't going to help you grow the fuck up and realize that you are sexist.

Oh yeah because an NSG forum is really going to help someone "grow da fukk up".

Preference for chastity = sexism?

Okay...whatever you say chief.

No, but you saying that women who have sex won't feel anything for you, and that they are ewww so icky if they have a penis in their fucking vagina is.

[Libertarian California]

Before you get into that, you have to first break down the difference in view of the body parts.

And that's an entirely different deal, which probably leads to the same 'based on intuition' flaw.


Once again, irrational fears negate rational thought. His beliefs are most certainly based in irrational fears, and that is what must be addressed, not the belief itself. Deal with the root issue, not the symptom. Otherwise, you're not helping at all.

Yeah, the vagina is a lady part, and if anyone touches it, it makes the woman gross and dirty and used and eeeewwwww.

And if I do happen to think that, what are you gonna do, whine about it? It's not like it affects you in any way, shape, or form.

[The Rich Port]

Yeah, the vagina is a lady part, and if anyone touches it, it makes the woman gross and dirty and used and eeeewwwww.

And if I do happen to think that, what are you gonna do, whine about it? It's not like it affects you in any way, shape, or form.

Yes. Sexism affects no one. Especially not women.

[Libertarian California]

Oh yeah because an NSG forum is really going to help someone "grow da fukk up".

Preference for chastity = sexism?

Okay...whatever you say chief.

No, but you saying that women who have sex won't feel anything for you, and that they are ewww so icky if they have a penis in their fucking vagina is.

I'm not seeing it.

[Condunum]

Cond babying you isn't going to help you grow the fuck up and realize that you are sexist.

Oh yeah because an NSG forum is really going to help someone "grow da fukk up".

Preference for chastity = sexism?

Okay...whatever you say chief.

I think she's referring to your unfounded belief that there is some sort of issue with women who've been with other men. While I realize that it's based in a fear, she's right, it's unfounded. If you actually have an issue with this when you're with someone, talk to them about it. Make sure your issues are understood. Complaining about them doesn't really help.

[Transhuman Proteus]

I really didn't want to explain why, but you seem so annoyingly insistent on something that shouldn't matter. Here's why:

I'm a virgin myself. I feel left out and left behind because everyone else my age is banging away. I'm bad with girls as it is, so I know I'm not loosing my virginity for a while. However, I've come to accept that. Still sucks feeling left out though.

I'm the jealous type, and I'm very possessive and territorial. When I think about having sex with a girl, I think about it being something very special for the both us, and having it be one of the best experiences of each other's lives. If she's been with other men, then how could I know if what I did with her was all that meaningful if Joe Schmoe probably gave her the time of her life. I'd feel like I was worth less than her previous lovers, as if I was just another guy for her to fuck. It would cheapen the whole thing.

I've also got a dirty mind. I wouldn't like to put my penis in a place whether other penises have been in before. It seems icky, and relates to the above paragraph that I'm just another dick she's taking and not anything meaningful.


I'm now in a bad mood, but probably because I almost got in a horrible car accident two hours ago.

Listen the fuck here, alright?
Virgin shaming is just as fucking bad as slut shaming and if I were near you and heard anyone virgin shaming you or making you feel bad for not having sex I would punch them in the face. And I don't even fucking like you.
And if you are serious about wanting your first time to be special, wait for a girl who you love, and make sure she loves you. And if she loves you, it doesn't matter if the sex was the best she's every had or you were the shittiest fucker she's ever let her vagina encounter. If she fucking loves you it will be special and she will be pleased beyond measure. Don't fucking listen to anyone who says otherwise because they are fucking wrong as fuck and you should kick them in their dicks/twatpots.
If she's been with other men, does that mean you can't love her? Because that's what my fucking husband said when he found out I wasn't a virgin, and I fucking ripped him a new one because that's a dick move and you've gotta grow the fuck up if you're judging women on their previous sexual life.
And you don't want to put your penis in a place where other penises have been? What the fuck? Do you fucking think it's like rubbing your junk on another man's junk? because it's fucking not. And again, whether you're her fucking first, or the 100th penis she's had in her cooch, if SHE FUCKING LOVES YOU IT'S FUCKING MEANINGFUL.

A lot of truth in that post, that a lot of people in the world could do with remembering.

I really didn't want to explain why, but you seem so annoyingly insistent on something that shouldn't matter. Here's why:

I'm a virgin myself. I feel left out and left behind because everyone else my age is banging away. I'm bad with girls as it is, so I know I'm not losing my virginity for a while. However, I've come to accept that. Still sucks feeling left out though.

I'm the jealous type, and I'm very possessive and territorial. When I think about having sex with a girl, I think about it being something very special for the both us, and having it be one of the best experiences of each other's lives. If she's been with other men, then how could I know if what I did with her was all that meaningful if Joe Schmoe probably gave her the time of her life. I'd feel like I was worth less than her previous lovers, as if I was just another guy for her to fuck. It would cheapen the whole thing.

I've also got a dirty mind. I wouldn't like to put my penis in a place whether other penises have been in before. It seems icky, and relates to the above paragraph that I'm just another dick she's taking and not anything meaningful.


I'm now in a bad mood, but probably because I almost got in a horrible car accident two hours ago.

Just on that - I don't know how old you are, but it is unlikely it is "everyone" - especially if you are still in school (unless it has changed hugely since I was in school, which wasn't that long ago) We can be quite good at making ourselves think we are the only ones who aren't having sex (society helps, with every hysterical "teens are engaging in sex crazed orgies! It wasn't like this in my day!" non-news story), but typically there is a not-insignificant number of people (sometimes even a majority) who haven't decided to start having sex yet for whatever reason (or would like to have sex, but haven't had the chance), or who might have had their first time but still aren't having lots of sex (again, for whatever reason, since not being a virgin anymore doesn't mean one has to, or will, suddenly start having lots of sex).

So don't let that get you down.

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

Cond babying you isn't going to help you grow the fuck up and realize that you are sexist.

I'm not babying him. I'm saying "don't be a dick to him, try to talk the problem out of him."

You're only making excuses for him and holding him tight and screaming, "STOP BEING MEAN TO LC!!! Stop calling him out on his blatant sexism and the fact that he's immature!"

[Libertarian California]

And if I do happen to think that, what are you gonna do, whine about it? It's not like it affects you in any way, shape, or form.

Yes. Sexism affects no one. Especially not women.

Considering, I've never been with a woman (at least not physically), I don't see how I'm harming any women.

[Condunum]

Oh yeah because an NSG forum is really going to help someone "grow da fukk up".

Preference for chastity = sexism?

Okay...whatever you say chief.

No, but you saying that women who have sex won't feel anything for you, and that they are ewww so icky if they have a penis in their fucking vagina is.

Calm down, reread what he said. You are not helping.

[Condunum]

I'm not babying him. I'm saying "don't be a dick to him, try to talk the problem out of him."

You're only making excuses for him and holding him tight and screaming, "STOP BEING MEAN TO LC!!! Stop calling him out on his blatant sexism and the fact that he's immature!"

No, I'm not. I'm saying he has irrational fears. I'm not making excuses, I'm saying that is what you should focus on. Issue, not symptom. Issue, not symptom.

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

No, but you saying that women who have sex won't feel anything for you, and that they are ewww so icky if they have a penis in their fucking vagina is.

I'm not seeing it.

How the fuck are you not seeing that it is sexism?
You think that women who have sex suddenly lose the ability to find meaning in a relationship or the first sexual act of a relationship. And you think that women's vagina's get "dirty" or "used" or "damaged" when they have sex and the only way for them to be good enough for you is if you are the only one to shove a cock in her.
Fucking. Sexism.

[Nailed to the Perch]

...do you also feel that way about shaking hands with people? "EWWWW YOUR HANDS HAVE TOUCHED HANDS OTHER THAN MINE AT SOME POINT IN YOUR LIFE, YOU HAVE PERMANENT ICKY HAND COOTIES"? Because that's pretty freaking stupid, I have to say.

Before you get into that, you have to first break down the difference in view of the body parts.

And that's an entirely different deal, which probably leads to the same 'based on intuition' flaw.

Sex with someone you care deeply about and who cares deeply about you will be meaningful, no matter what. That meaning isn't invested by the lack of magical penis-cooties, but by the caring.

Once again, irrational fears negate rational thought. His beliefs are most certainly based in irrational fears, and that is what must be addressed, not the belief itself. Deal with the root issue, not the symptom. Otherwise, you're not helping at all.

I think the problem here is that you assume anyone should care about "helping" someone who addresses women he disagrees with as "cunts." I was willing to be polite about saying his position was stupid and sexist before that, but at this point, I sincerely hope no woman comes near him until he grows up rather a lot.

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

Yes. Sexism affects no one. Especially not women.

Considering, I've never been with a woman (at least not physically), I don't see how I'm harming any women.

You ARE harming women by thinking that women who have sex are incapable of feeling meaning and love and that they get damaged by having sex.

[Desperate Measures]

Why do people insist on thinking someone else's sexuality is any of their fucking business?

It's scary when people don't have their personal decisions made for them by other people?

[Condunum]

Before you get into that, you have to first break down the difference in view of the body parts.

And that's an entirely different deal, which probably leads to the same 'based on intuition' flaw.


Once again, irrational fears negate rational thought. His beliefs are most certainly based in irrational fears, and that is what must be addressed, not the belief itself. Deal with the root issue, not the symptom. Otherwise, you're not helping at all.

I think the problem here is that you assume anyone should care about "helping" someone who addresses women he disagrees with as "cunts." I was willing to be polite about saying his position was stupid and sexist before that, but at this point, I sincerely hope no woman comes near him until he grows up rather a lot.

He wasn't referring to women, although I did somewhat ignore that part. He said, and I'm paraphrasing I think, "At least some people aren't being cunts about it," which is a rather typical term used by most teenagers to mean asshole.


LC, don't call people cunts. In fact, you need to be just as calm as the rest of us here need to be.

[Libertarian California]

Oh yeah because an NSG forum is really going to help someone "grow da fukk up".

Preference for chastity = sexism?

Okay...whatever you say chief.

I think she's referring to your unfounded belief that there is some sort of issue with women who've been with other men. While I realize that it's based in a fear, she's right, it's unfounded. If you actually have an issue with this when you're with someone, talk to them about it. Make sure your issues are understood. Complaining about them doesn't really help.

Perhaps my belief is unfounded. There's another reason why I prefer virgins (that I did not mention earlier, and it has to do with attractiveness). It boils down to my personal preference. Would I be unfounded in wishing that everyone was blond like me? It's not like I actually want to get rid of non-blonds. It's just my preference and what I find to be ideal.

[The Rich Port]

Considering, I've never been with a woman (at least not physically), I don't see how I'm harming any women.

You ARE harming women by thinking that women who have sex are incapable of feeling meaning and love and that they get damaged by having sex.

Not to mention he's being completely fucking ignorant and prejudicial since he's never had sex with a woman and therefore has no basis for his belief.

But... I think that's already been established before. By me, of all people.