Child Discipline

[Desperate Measures]

I live in a rather crunchy area, and the hip young parents in our neck of the woods are currently all about Attachment Parenting. This is where you wear your baby in a sling all the time, you co-sleep with the kids in the bed, you breastfeed until the kids are well into toddlerhood or beyond, and you refrain from "forcing" your children to perform manners or other things because it will repress their delicate selves.

For anybody who watches Big Bang Theory, the actress who plays Amy Farrah Fowler is all about this style of parenting: http://scienceblogs.com/insolence/2012/ ... ah-fowler/.

I'm into baby wearing, unschooling, and breastfeeding (there are important benefits, and it's also religiously recommended.) but there's a line I draw at co-sleeping and not teaching kids manners.

Pretty much.

[The Emerald Dawn]

I'm into baby wearing, unschooling, and breastfeeding (there are important benefits, and it's also religiously recommended.) but there's a line I draw at co-sleeping and not teaching kids manners.

Pretty much.

I love falling asleep in my rocking chair with my friend's little one in my arms. It's a snooze fest.

[Desperate Measures]

No one is going to tell me I cannot spank my child if I feel it is warranted. That's a FACT.

Hopefully you don't have kids. Then I won't have to tell you not to do that and destroy your FACT.

[Salandriagado]

It shows that they are thinking, and you should always let them express their feelings and thoughts, and then calmly tell them why things are the way they are.

They can think without being a smart-mouthed brat.

My parents allowed me to question things, but they taught me when it was appropriate to question.

It is always appropriate to question.

Purposeful infliction of pain upon a child is always violence.

Well, I hope you can have a reasonable discussion with your children why it's not ok to spit in mommy's face.

I've had perfectly reasonable and intelligent discussions with kids. Some of them discussions I couldn't be sure of having a similarly reasonable discussion had I posted them here, frankly.

Everybody knows discussions with a 3 year old always work out.

A lot better than setting an example that hitting people is OK?

I will be proud when my child openly challenges me.

I wouldn't, that is a sign of disrespect. That is belt worthy behavior.

No. It shows independence. I've had kids openly challenge things I've said a few times, and they've been right more often than not.

That doesn't work. Not the way anybody sane would consider "working". I don't know how thinking it is extremely wrong to be hitting a person who can't hit you back is the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard. It seems very not ridiculous to me especially when parenting can be done effectively without whipping a kid with a belt. I've been doing the parenting thing for about five years now and I've never had to resort to violence.

You're lucky to have children good enough to not require it. I've met kids that could use a good whacking to straighten them out.

The word you're looking for is not "lucky". Something like "a good enough parent" would be more appropriate.

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

I'm into baby wearing, unschooling, and breastfeeding (there are important benefits, and it's also religiously recommended.) but there's a line I draw at co-sleeping and not teaching kids manners.

I think that having a baby and having a life shouldn't be mutually exclusive.

Where does any of that say I won't have a life?

[Desperate Measures]

Pretty much.

I love falling asleep in my rocking chair with my friend's little one in my arms. It's a snooze fest.

Well, yeah - that IS awesome. But the whole sleeping with the kid until they are in third grade is not so very awesome.

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

I love falling asleep in my rocking chair with my friend's little one in my arms. It's a snooze fest.

Well, yeah - that IS awesome. But the whole sleeping with the kid until they are in third grade is not so very awesome.

There's a point at which it becomes bad for the child in terms of independence or attachment problems...

[The Rich Port]

Well it's saying to punish children because you love them, those who only spare the rod "hate" their children. Also none of you are my parents to my knowledge so don't touch me, I'm fragile.

I agree with the old saying completely, sometimes talking doesn't do the job. I'd probably talk to the kid once about a specific incident, but on a repeat offense it's belt time.

"I'm beating the crap out of you because I LURV you"

And that's what domestic violence is, amirite?

[Soldati Senza Confini]

No one is going to tell me I cannot spank my child if I feel it is warranted. That's a FACT.

You do not have the unfettered right to hit your child. I encourage you to avoid testing the law on this subject, since you'll probably fuck up your own life in addition to alienating your child.

Well, in a way, I think each and every parent has the option to use corporal punishment within reasonable boundaries if needed.

I would never spank my children, but that's because I believe it's extremely inefficient.

However, I will agree that one thing is spanking them or using the belt on them lightly, and another thing is beating them down until you draw blood out of their bodies. One is abuse and the other one isn't.

[Soldati Senza Confini]

I agree with the old saying completely, sometimes talking doesn't do the job. I'd probably talk to the kid once about a specific incident, but on a repeat offense it's belt time.

"I'm beating the crap out of you because I LURV you"

And that's what domestic violence is, amirite?

Well, when you put it that way yes.

However, not many parents are going to whip their children with an electric wire, only the shitty ones.

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

You do not have the unfettered right to hit your child. I encourage you to avoid testing the law on this subject, since you'll probably fuck up your own life in addition to alienating your child.

Well, in a way, I think each and every parent has the option to use corporal punishment within reasonable boundaries if needed.

I would never spank my children, but that's because I believe it's extremely inefficient.

However, I will agree that one thing is spanking them or using the belt on them lightly, and another thing is beating them down until you draw blood out of their bodies. One is abuse and the other one isn't.

Both of them are abuse.

[Soldati Senza Confini]

Both of them are abuse.

No, not "both of them" are abuse.

You are comparing apples and oranges. You just can't say a single spank to a child is harmful to them. Or pulling their ear.

One is well, something I would disagree on on personal grounds, the other one is completely unacceptable.

Like I said, I would never spank my children, but that doesn't mean I will tell other parents they are shitty parents if they do so. I only focus parenting in how the children behave, not on whether they believe spanking or belting a child for a wrongdoing is a bad idea (unless they happen to be abusive methods, but spanking them is, hardly, abusive).

And "abuse" can also mean emotional abuse, which hurts far more than physical. Believe me when I say this, my grandmother used to abuse of me and my brothers emotionally.

[Soldati Senza Confini]

I ALWAYS SPANK MY SON WHEN HE:

a)chews with his mouth open

b) says hi and not hello

c)talks withour permission, and

d)anythng I don't like, including

e)all of the above

Well, it doesn't seem to be working now is it?

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

Both of them are abuse.

No, not "both of them" are abuse.

You are comparing apples and oranges. You just can't say a single spank to a child is harmful to them. Or pulling their ear.

One is well, something I would disagree on on personal grounds, the other one is completely unacceptable.

Like I said, I would never spank my children, but that doesn't mean I will tell other parents they are shitty parents if they do so. I only focus parenting in how the children behave, not on whether they believe spanking or belting a child for a wrongdoing is a bad idea (unless they happen to be abusive methods, but spanking them is, hardly, abusive).

And "abuse" can also mean emotional abuse, which hurts far more than physical.

Inflicting pain on a child purposefully is fucking abuse.

[Soldati Senza Confini]

Inflicting pain on a child purposefully is fucking abuse.

And I am telling you it's not simply because many children are spanked and they don't hold grudges against their parents.

In fact, most people who were spanked as children do it less or don't do it at all, but they still love and respect their parents. I can't see how you fail to understand that mere spanking is not abuse, but taking that to the next level is.

[Pandamia]

You shouldn't beat them, you should punish them, i.e. no TV for a week if your child watches TV a lot. Violence is not the answer... at least with children.

[Equalsun Empire]

I believe if you do not discipline your child, they suffer later in life for their ignorance of proper authority.

[Soldati Senza Confini]

I believe if you do not discipline your child, they suffer later in life for their ignorance of proper authority.

exactly my thoughts.

However, corporal punishment I just see it as inefficient.

[Soldati Senza Confini]

exactly my thoughts.

However, corporal punishment I just see it as inefficient.

What-EVA!

keep on saying that when my son becomes the next hitler and crushes you under his boot!


MWA HA HA!

LMAO! Not if my child becomes the next Albert Einstein and trolls with yours for the heck of it

[NERVUN]

I love falling asleep in my rocking chair with my friend's little one in my arms. It's a snooze fest.

Well, yeah - that IS awesome. But the whole sleeping with the kid until they are in third grade is not so very awesome.

Why?

[Esternial]

Why?

Yes. For once I agree with a mod. Why?

Should you be spanking him/her instead?

You seem to have some kind of weird spanking fetish.

[Norstal]

Yes. For once I agree with a mod. Why?

Should you be spanking him/her instead?

You seem to have some kind of weird spanking fetish.

Not the worst NSG has to offer, but it's getting there.

[Mkuki]

Why?

Yes. For once I agree with a mod. Why?

Should you be spanking him/her instead?

How about neither?

[Divair]

You seem to have some kind of weird spanking fetish.

Not the worst NSG has to offer, but it's getting there.

There's always something worse on NSG.

[Mkuki]

How about neither?

Because spanking is the WAY TO GO!
(cause i don't have a branding iron)

How about it isn't the way to go? Why not treat your kid as a human and not, y'know, like a damn dog?