Child Discipline

[Soldati Senza Confini]

I never said I was infallible, and I would never let them disrespect me.

Such a statement assumes that you will never do anything worthy of disrespect though.

I WANT them to be independent, however I don't want them to disrespect me. It's a fine line between letting them have freedom and having them trample all over you.

Having your child openly challenge you is not trampling all over you.

1 - No I would never do something worth of disrespect because I would put my children FIRST! When, and if, I have children, I have said I will commit my time to them and I will do anything for them. And my dad has done many wrong decisions, but I don't disrespect him regardless of the many times he and I have locked our heads in those kinds of situations when I was a teenager because of the simple fact that he knew how to raise us in a lax manner, but he was authoritarian when he had to be.

2 - Having your child openly challenge you IS the beginning. The child will test their boundaries. If you don't stop an open challenge then they will think challenging your authority is fine and that you are not worth of respect.

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

The first time my mother hit me was the first time I tried to commit suicide.

Well that is not normal. That was a problem with you not your mother. I would have had you see somebody if that's the case.

Yes, my mother beat me and that was my problem. OF COURSE.

[Flaxxony-Setram]

Not mutually exclusive. Question was did it work? And efficient?

Paddle gets the point across.

Paddle is unnecessary and a violation of the child's right to not be purposefully put in pain.

Quite the opposite. And no such right exists.

[Desperate Measures]

Parents that lay a hand on their kids should be arrested for assault.

That is the most ridiculous thing I've seen in this thread yet! If a kid need discipline and using the belt works, use it!

That doesn't work. Not the way anybody sane would consider "working". I don't know how thinking it is extremely wrong to be hitting a person who can't hit you back is the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard. It seems very not ridiculous to me especially when parenting can be done effectively without whipping a kid with a belt. I've been doing the parenting thing for about five years now and I've never had to resort to violence.

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

Paddle is unnecessary and a violation of the child's right to not be purposefully put in pain.

Quite the opposite. And no such right exists.

All humans deserve the right to not be attacked.

[Flaxxony-Setram]

Well that is not normal. That was a problem with you not your mother. I would have had you see somebody if that's the case.

Yes, my mother beat me and that was my problem. OF COURSE.

Um, actually, yes.

I have NEVER met someone who tried to kill themselves over a one time paddling or spanking. Or even a belting.

[Flaxxony-Setram]

Quite the opposite. And no such right exists.

All humans deserve the right to not be attacked.

Criminals surrender that right. Hence punishment is retaliation, not aggression.

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

Yes, my mother beat me and that was my problem. OF COURSE.

Um, actually, yes.

I have NEVER met someone who tried to kill themselves over a one time paddling or spanking. Or even a belting.

Negative.

[Soldati Senza Confini]

Such a statement assumes that you will never do anything worthy of disrespect though.

Having your child openly challenge you is not trampling all over you.

I can kinda see where he's coming from, though perhaps not stating it as well as it could be.

It's knowing that you ARE the parent (Or teacher) and thus are the adult in charge. That doesn't make you infallible, nor does it mean you cannot nor should not listen to the children in your care, but it does mean yours is the final decision because yours is also the responsibility.

Thank you for clarifying my point

[Zweite Alaje]

That is the most ridiculous thing I've seen in this thread yet! If a kid need discipline and using the belt works, use it!

That doesn't work. Not the way anybody sane would consider "working". I don't know how thinking it is extremely wrong to be hitting a person who can't hit you back is the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard. It seems very not ridiculous to me especially when parenting can be done effectively without whipping a kid with a belt. I've been doing the parenting thing for about five years now and I've never had to resort to violence.

You're lucky to have children good enough to not require it. I've met kids that could use a good whacking to straighten them out.

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

All humans deserve the right to not be attacked.

Criminals surrender that right. Hence punishment is retaliation, not aggression.

Even criminals deserve the right to not be purposefully put in pain.

[Flaxxony-Setram]

Um, actually, yes.

I have NEVER met someone who tried to kill themselves over a one time paddling or spanking. Or even a belting.

Negative.

What did the shrink say about it

[Flaxxony-Setram]

Criminals surrender that right. Hence punishment is retaliation, not aggression.

Even criminals deserve the right to not be purposefully put in pain.

So punishment doesn't exist? Prisons aren't there?

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

Negative.

What did the shrink say about it

that my mother beat me and it was not my fault and that I need more therapy to recover

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

Even criminals deserve the right to not be purposefully put in pain.

So punishment doesn't exist? Prisons aren't there?

Prisons =/= pain.
prisons = detainment.

[Flaxxony-Setram]

What did the shrink say about it

that my mother beat me and it was not my fault and that I need more therapy to recover

Well it isn't your fault, duh.

That doesn't mean you didn't have hypersensitive tendencies as part of your psychological framework.

[Flaxxony-Setram]

So punishment doesn't exist? Prisons aren't there?

Prisons =/= pain.
prisons = detainment.

And by transitive property, detainment=pain

[NERVUN]

That doesn't work. Not the way anybody sane would consider "working". I don't know how thinking it is extremely wrong to be hitting a person who can't hit you back is the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard. It seems very not ridiculous to me especially when parenting can be done effectively without whipping a kid with a belt. I've been doing the parenting thing for about five years now and I've never had to resort to violence.

You're lucky to have children good enough to not require it. I've met kids that could use a good whacking to straighten them out.

I've met (and taught) a number of bad kids, a beating wouldn't have helped matters and in fact probably would have harmed them more.

[Torcularis Septentrionalis]

Prisons =/= pain.
prisons = detainment.

And by transitive property, detainment=pain

No it doesn't.

[Desperate Measures]

That doesn't work. Not the way anybody sane would consider "working". I don't know how thinking it is extremely wrong to be hitting a person who can't hit you back is the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard. It seems very not ridiculous to me especially when parenting can be done effectively without whipping a kid with a belt. I've been doing the parenting thing for about five years now and I've never had to resort to violence.

You're lucky to have children good enough to not require it. I've met kids that could use a good whacking to straighten them out.

Half the time those kids are that way because they've been getting whacked. And my kid is no angel but she listens when I speak and she respects it more because we always talk things out, whether on the spot or after she's had time to calm down from a time-out.

[Vazdania]

So punishment doesn't exist? Prisons aren't there?

Prisons =/= pain.
prisons = detainment.

it almost seems like a luxury...Being able to get 3 meals a day....MANY SENIOR CITIZENS DON'T EVEN GET THAT.

[Norstal]

You're lucky to have children good enough to not require it. I've met kids that could use a good whacking to straighten them out.

I've met (and taught) a number of bad kids, a beating wouldn't have helped matters and in fact probably would have harmed them more.

Can't you beat kids in Japan though? I thought you can.

[Soldati Senza Confini]

The first time my mother hit me was the first time I tried to commit suicide.

Okay, that was... exaggerated on your part

The first time my dad beat me was because I crossed a river while raining when I was 7. I didn't try to go back to the river and drown either, I just cried myself to sleep.

The last time was when I was about 12 or 13. Nothing happened, I didn't wanted to kill myself; hell, I don't think I even remember being mad at my dad but at myself for getting myself in that mess. It was mostly the fact I openly challenged him on a decision he made.

Your whole reaction was overly dramatic.

[Flaxxony-Setram]

And by transitive property, detainment=pain

No it doesn't.

Ever thought that prison sucks ass? That maybe it doesn't do shit? Except pay inmates to become better criminals? And employ ons of lawyers?

[NERVUN]

I've met (and taught) a number of bad kids, a beating wouldn't have helped matters and in fact probably would have harmed them more.

Can't you beat kids in Japan though? I thought you can.

Technically speaking, corporal punishment is forbidden in schools. The reality is that a number of old time teachers still believe in it and... it happens. The tide is changing though with recent deaths/suicides due to the practice though.