7 Worst Things About Being Male

[Neo Art]

What were you drinking?! The Pope's Piss?

Actually the drinks were a kamikaze and an overpriced beer.

The rest was totaled in broken bar furniture, a cracked lexan bar top, glass shelves and bottles behind the bar, and stitches for an emergency room visit... granted the initial total was $700 but a bit of persuasion dropped it to half

Oh. You're "that guy". The one who gets "drunk" after a drink and a shot and thinks it funny to commit a few crimes because he's "so wasted, man".

The rest of your posting history makes a lot more sense in context.

[Ethel mermania]

mom is dead, (goes off and cries).

(yes mom did pass away, but it was 12 years ago). how is your mom doing?

Probably dying. But apparently I should stop worrying about her, do I want any soup?

i am sorry to hear that, you have my sympahty. get the soup reciepies from her and let her know your going to make it for your kids, if you should have any.

if your ever in nyc i will buy you a beer. and i promise not to ask you to smile

[High Nordland]

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/sex-murder-and-the-meaning-life/201201/the-7-worst-things-about-being-male

Well, some of them are exclusive to heterosexual males, but nonetheless, shit. Are these actually true, or are these just MRA talking points? Are there legitimate downsides to being male, or is being male similar to being white in that it's absolutely all privilege with no problems whatsoever? And, if there are legitimate downsides to being male, is it wrong to bring them up since the downsides to being female are probably worse? Is it okay to address a minor problem when a worse problem exists? Some people in the comments actually state that it's harder being male than it is being female. That's probably bunk, but is it acceptable to even discuss any potential problems that might face males given that female problems are worse?

I have to say, most of the things on that list, I've never experienced. I've never been beat up, nor have I ever felt compelled to get into a fight. I've never had this overwhelming, uncontrollable desire for constant 24/7 sex that apparently every man is supposed to have. I've never felt compelled to make ungodly amounts of money, nor have I ever been pressured to do so. I have no desire to show off money by making idiotic purchases either, and in fact I'm rather thrifty when it comes to spending money on myself. Am I some freak exception? Are most men actually the way he describes? Further, if they are that way, is it really because of biology or is it just because of the way society is?

I've never had any of these problems.

[Snafturi]

You know, from reading the past discussion, I figured out something. You know what really sucks about being male? Wanting to do something nice for a girl because of freaking human decency or something equally innocent like that, and having everyone assume that your end goal is to get her into your pants.

It really depends on how people go about it. When I'm out, I often like to study. I don't know how many people have tried to strike up conversations by either teasing me about this or mentioning how lonely I must be (I hate that even when I don't have my books, but especially when I do). I'm not an antisocial person either, and it's perfectly fine for someone to come up and talk to me more often than not (when it's finals, I do politely tell people I need to be left alone). But it's all in the presentation. "What are you studying/ you're really into that/ hey cool, I do the same thing" are all perfectly fine openers most of the time. But, I've actually had guys who, instead of doing this, do the former and I've had one decide to try setting my messenger bag on fire.

Yes, we sometimes misjudge people's intentions, but this happens when you get bombarded with assholes constantly.

[Snafturi]

I missed this post at first. Please do not tell strangers "give us a smile." It may be an expression, but it's an obnoxious expression, and it will quite honestly make a lot of women think, "oh geez, not another douchebag." Since it doesn't sound like your aim is to come off as a douchebag, I really recommend cutting that phrase out of your vocabulary unless it's directed at someone you already know well.

Obnoxious to you, the ladies here in Portland don't seem to mind it a bit. I have yet, despite going to a great many bars, and starting a great many conversations, have a single lady do anything but laugh at the man in the wheelchair, or say "hello".

Portland, Oregon?

[Christmahanikwanzikah]

Actually the drinks were a kamikaze and an overpriced beer.

The rest was totaled in broken bar furniture, a cracked lexan bar top, glass shelves and bottles behind the bar, and stitches for an emergency room visit... granted the initial total was $700 but a bit of persuasion dropped it to half

Oh. You're "that guy". The one who gets "drunk" after a drink and a shot and thinks it funny to commit a few crimes because he's "so wasted, man".

The rest of your posting history makes a lot more sense in context.

I already told you, I didn't know there was that much alcohol in Shirley Temples.

[Snafturi]

I stand corrected. I think I might have been guilty of some confirmation bias. I tend to not hang out with assholes, so I haven't seen those happenings. Could also be a cultural thing. Haven't lived in the US for quite some time, and when I did, I generally frequented drinking establishments where this would be less likely to be an issue.

FWIW, I don't think you owed her a polite response. Those are like, the rules for talking to working folks in brothels or strip clubs, not for general social time.



Norway.

Confirmation bias is a human tendency. The trick is to recognize it (which I often fail at TBH) and adjust accordingly. Even then, that's one example of that particular exchange. I've done the same thing plenty of other times and come to the conclusion that the drink was ancillary to chemistry and personality in the first place anyway, so my anecodotal evidence really should be taken for what it's worth.

And really? Norway? Generally the bars and nightclubs I visited in Bergen weren't unreasonably pricey, and they weren't dives or holes-in-the-wall either. Even the most expensive one wasn't godawful, and I figured that since there was no cover charge and it really was rather well done inside (sort of like a Scandinavian interpretation of an American dive bar but well done... yes it was as wonderfully strange as it sounds) that the establishment had to make up their money somewhere and it had to come from the drinks.

Ah yes, Norway...and Norwegian women....

Now I'm curious what the actual rates are of women who won't talk to guys who don't buy them drinks.

Alcohol tax gets more and more insane, but I have a hard time believing alcohol was ever remotely reasonable here. There are thankfully, not often cover charges, so that helps. I'm glad you actually went to Bergen instead of Oslo like most people do, although I don't know how you managed to avoid some of the dodgier pubs and clubs in that city.

The Scotsman is scary because it's the worst kind of meat market. Exodus is scary because there you get to see old men drooling over preteens who sneak in (old men are sneaking in too, that place is supposed to have an upper age limit). The Harp is scary because that's where people go get into bar fights. Metro is scary because it's extremely expensive to get in and even worse once you're in.... unless you're a young hot woman who wants to find guys to buy them free drinks. Then the cover is waived. And finally there is Ugle, which is scary for reasons that cannot be repeated on a PG 13 board.

[Christmahanikwanzikah]

I'd love to fully agree with you, but the whole buying drinks thing is a cultural norm at this point.

Screw the cultural norm. I wanna invent new ways to get rejected.

[Individuality-ness]

You know, from reading the past discussion, I figured out something. You know what really sucks about being male? Wanting to do something nice for a girl because of freaking human decency or something equally innocent like that, and having everyone assume that your end goal is to get her into your pants.

It really depends on how people go about it. When I'm out, I often like to study. I don't know how many people have tried to strike up conversations by either teasing me about this or mentioning how lonely I must be (I hate that even when I don't have my books, but especially when I do). I'm not an antisocial person either, and it's perfectly fine for someone to come up and talk to me more often than not (when it's finals, I do politely tell people I need to be left alone). But it's all in the presentation. "What are you studying/ you're really into that/ hey cool, I do the same thing" are all perfectly fine openers most of the time. But, I've actually had guys who, instead of doing this, do the former and I've had one decide to try setting my messenger bag on fire.

Yes, we sometimes misjudge people's intentions, but this happens when you get bombarded with assholes constantly.

I know. I would have said the following earlier but class:

There's a way to do it that's creepy and/or obnoxious and there's a way to do it that's not creepy and/or obnoxious.

Creepy and/or obnoxious is going up to a person and saying "He-llo beautiful, you're so beautiful, what is someone like you doing alone tonight?" and ordering a drink for her right off the bat before she can object. It's going up to a person and saying "Hey, why not give me a smile?" right off the bat. Stuff like that.

Not creep/obnoxious is going up to a person and saying "Hi, I noticed that you looked a bit lonely. Do you mind if I join you?" or "Hey, I noticed that you were <doing x activity> and I'm interested in learning more about it, do you want to teach me?" or something similar. And then assuming that she accepts and after getting to know each other better, offer to buy her a drink.

The problem is that there's some people who do the latter, or who just poke her to tell her that she dropped something (e.g. a wallet), and the girl reacting as if he was about to rape her or something. And then we have those asshole who think that doing the latter means that she has to give him sex. Both of them which suck.

[The Emerald Dawn]

Obnoxious to you, the ladies here in Portland don't seem to mind it a bit. I have yet, despite going to a great many bars, and starting a great many conversations, have a single lady do anything but laugh at the man in the wheelchair, or say "hello".

Portland, Oregon?

I live near there, yes. We frequently go to bars/pubs there because there is fuckall worth in the small town I live in.

[Nailed to the Perch]

The problem is that there's some people who do the latter, or who just poke her to tell her that she dropped something (e.g. a wallet), and the girl reacting as if he was about to rape her or something. And then we have those asshole who think that doing the latter means that she has to give him sex. Both of them which suck.

Ehhhh, I'd be hesitant to say that girls reacting with fear "suck." I mean, yes, it'd be rather weird to start screaming at a guy because he said, "Excuse me, miss," but most of the times I've seen people get frustrated with a woman for "reacting like they're going to rape her or something" when their actions were innocent, her reaction was simply something like flinching or looking visibly nervous. That's not being mean or sucky. That's being someone who has had a man she reacted to politely respond by getting aggressive and scary, and who is now gun-shy because of it.

(And, realistically, it's also worth noting that most of the times I've seen someone complain about a woman treating them like a possible rapist, it's because they did something scary. Often without meaning to, but that doesn't make the women unreasonable. For example, one time I heard a guy complain about this, his story turned out to be "I saw she dropped something, and rather than yelling, 'hey, you dropped something,' I followed her for several blocks late at night in an empty neighborhood to try to return it to her." That guy meant well, but all the woman knew was "some stranger is totally following me and coming up behind me oh shit oh shit." She wasn't acting scared to be mean to him; she was acting scared because, without meaning to, he was being fucking scary!)

[The Emerald Dawn]

The problem is that there's some people who do the latter, or who just poke her to tell her that she dropped something (e.g. a wallet), and the girl reacting as if he was about to rape her or something. And then we have those asshole who think that doing the latter means that she has to give him sex. Both of them which suck.

Ehhhh, I'd be hesitant to say that girls reacting with fear "suck." I mean, yes, it'd be rather weird to start screaming at a guy because he said, "Excuse me, miss," but most of the times I've seen people get frustrated with a woman for "reacting like they're going to rape her or something" when their actions were innocent, her reaction was simply something like flinching or looking visibly nervous. That's not being mean or sucky. That's being someone who has had a man she reacted to politely respond by getting aggressive and scary, and who is now gun-shy because of it.

(And, realistically, it's also worth noting that most of the times I've seen someone complain about a woman treating them like a possible rapist, it's because they did something scary. Often without meaning to, but that doesn't make the women unreasonable. For example, one time I heard a guy complain about this, his story turned out to be "I saw she dropped something, and rather than yelling, 'hey, you dropped something,' I followed her for several blocks late at night in an empty neighborhood to try to return it to her." That guy meant well, but all the woman knew was "some stranger is totally following me and coming up behind me oh shit oh shit." She wasn't acting scared to be mean to him; she was acting scared because, without meaning to, he was being fucking scary!)

Yeah, that'd be right out. "Miss! Excuse me, miss! You dropped something!" And if she starts running, I'd be at a loss for what to do, depending on the item. If she dropped a cell phone, I could return it to a vendor store, and they could try and find who it belonged to. A wallet is easy, just go to the cops and they'll get it back to her. Hairbrush? I'd probably just leave it alone.

[Individuality-ness]

The problem is that there's some people who do the latter, or who just poke her to tell her that she dropped something (e.g. a wallet), and the girl reacting as if he was about to rape her or something. And then we have those asshole who think that doing the latter means that she has to give him sex. Both of them which suck.

Ehhhh, I'd be hesitant to say that girls reacting with fear "suck." I mean, yes, it'd be rather weird to start screaming at a guy because he said, "Excuse me, miss," but most of the times I've seen people get frustrated with a woman for "reacting like they're going to rape her or something" when their actions were innocent, her reaction was simply something like flinching or looking visibly nervous. That's not being mean or sucky. That's being someone who has had a man she reacted to politely respond by getting aggressive and scary, and who is now gun-shy because of it.

I should have clarified. I think the stereotypes themselves suck, because it limits interaction between the sexes out of fear of looking like a potential rapist/becoming a victim of rape and otherwise being told that she deserved it for being friendly.

(And, realistically, it's also worth noting that most of the times I've seen someone complain about a woman treating them like a possible rapist, it's because they did something scary.

That is often true. I'll give you that.

Often without meaning to, but that doesn't make the women unreasonable. For example, one time I heard a guy complain about this, his story turned out to be "I saw she dropped something, and rather than yelling, 'hey, you dropped something,' I followed her for several blocks late at night in an empty neighborhood to try to return it to her." That guy meant well, but all the woman knew was "some stranger is totally following me and coming up behind me oh shit oh shit." She wasn't acting scared to be mean to him; she was acting scared because, without meaning to, he was being fucking scary!)

Yeah, that was just a lack in judgement. That would be scary, and she has good reason to be scared (besides ZOMG RAPE, since he could have been a mugger or a stalker or something).

I'm just saying that we're vilifying people who actually do mean well with the "potential rapist" brush, which is a problem when people start saying to prevent rape that a woman should never accept drinks from anyone ever or accept rides from people.

[Forsakia]

like i can spell

...No, not pointing out your spelling, just saying that you can't just hang a bloody tri-color flag, and call it an Irish pub.

Can the bouncers pick the fights?

Hell, now that I think about it:

There's a county map to go on the wall,
A hurling stick & a shinty ball,
The bric, the brac, the craic & all,
Lets call it an Irish pub,
Caffreys, Harp, Kilkenny on tap,
The Guinness pie & that cabbage crap,
The ideal wannabee Paddy trap,
We'll call it an Irish pub,

Well I'll be fooked! I swear upon the holy book,
The only 'craic' you'll get is a slap in the ear,
Well I'll be fooked! I'll up & burst yer filthy mug,
If you draw one more shamrock in me beer!

We'll raise the price o' beer a dollar,
We'll make em wear a shirt & collar,
We'll fly a bloody tri-colour,
And call it an Irish pub,
Jager bombs & double shots,
The underagers think its tops,
We'll spike the drinks & pay the cops,
We got us an Irish pub.

The quick one in the filthy bog,
The partin' glass across the lug,
O' the lady-O, the dirty dog,
We got us an Irish pub,
It's over to me and over to you,
We'll skip along the Avenue,
And who t'hell is Ronnie Drew?
We got us an Irish pub.

Plasma screens & neon lights,
Kara-farkin-oke nights,
The bouncers they can pick the fights,
We'll call it an Irish pub,
Plastic cups, a polished floor,
We'll hose the blood right out the door,
And let the knucklers back for more,
We got us an Irish pub,

Oh top o' the mornin', Garryowen,
Kiss me I'm Irish, Molly Malone,
Failte, Slainte, Pog ma thon,
We got us an Irish pub,
Spike the punch & strip the willow,
Strike me up the rakes o' Mallow,
The Liffey never ran so shallow,
We got us an Irish pub.

Related http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QnHn8jWUTIM

Now to run away before I get rapped on the knuckles for off-topicness.

[Northern Dominus]

Actually the drinks were a kamikaze and an overpriced beer.

The rest was totaled in broken bar furniture, a cracked lexan bar top, glass shelves and bottles behind the bar, and stitches for an emergency room visit... granted the initial total was $700 but a bit of persuasion dropped it to half

How did that happen?

As it turns out...

Actually the drinks were a kamikaze and an overpriced beer.

The rest was totaled in broken bar furniture, a cracked lexan bar top, glass shelves and bottles behind the bar, and stitches for an emergency room visit... granted the initial total was $700 but a bit of persuasion dropped it to half

Oh. You're "that guy". The one who gets "drunk" after a drink and a shot and thinks it funny to commit a few crimes because he's "so wasted, man".

The rest of your posting history makes a lot more sense in context.

....no, no, no, it would be helpful to refrain from passing judgement until the entire debacle is realized. And I'd thank you to not pass judgement, less I pass judgement upon ye.

Anyway, as it turns out when one is in the Wynwood neighborhood of Miami, Florida, and one is at a nightclub/bar (hard to tell with that place), one apparently isn't supposed to even look at a woman that a local wannabe gangbanger (Miami Dade PD's assesment, not mine!), nevermind try to engage her in pleasant non-committal conversation.

Suffice it to say, the aformentioned wannabe gangbanger didn't appreciate the advance and reciprocation, gets in her face. This alleged "one" who just happens to be a USCG gunner's mate at the time as well as training in jeet kune do and balitok eskrima, verbally objects and tries to get in between this alleged wannabe gangbanger and his woman.... fine that WAS me, the case was dropped so I can talk about it.

Anyway, I attempted to defuse the situation and was going to placate him with a drink and move on, but the guy tried to haymaker me. The training paid off when I grabbed the guys arm and bounced his forehead off of the lexan bar top, which cracked.
As it turns out, neither of us were alone. In my case it was a friend from the area and another gunner's mate, he apparently had a couple of his friends....and that set off a bit of a bar brawl where furniture got broken and one barstool went over the bar itself and into the bottles behind it.

Oh yeah, the stitches... turns out the guy's chin sorta caught the edge of the lexan bar top and it split open, nessecitating a trip to the ER and a few stitches. Since his uncle knew the bar owner they sort of got together and tried to pin it on me. It took a bit of convincing but there were more than a few witnesses that backed up my self-defense, and I figured $350 was enough of an olive branch to a local businessman.

So that's how one can spend $350 for two drinks. And for the record to anyone who might be attempting to warp this into a "yeah I bet he got hammered and started throwing shit" accusation... I didn't want to fight. Hell I was just trying to calm the guy down and move on, there were plenty of rather attractive puerto rican mamis in the bar that I could have floated to. But no, the other guy had to start the fight, had to first get aggressive with a woman who didn't indicate in any deliberate fashion that she might have been involved with somebody, then attempted to assault somebody who not only was actively learning a rather practical martial art at the time but also was a USCG NCO in good standing.

[Snafturi]

Portland, Oregon?

I live near there, yes. We frequently go to bars/pubs there because there is fuckall worth in the small town I live in.

I've probably lived near you then at some point. Never actually lived in Portland proper, but always nearby until I left the US.

Anyway, yeah I can totally see in your experience that you've never had issues with your particular opener for a number of reasons. You're most likely going to be in places where that kind of comment will be well recieved. And you (most likely) having an accent probably helps more than you know. You could wander up and say "golden walnuts!" to people, and most PDXers will still stop and engage in conversation because you sound cool.

[Snafturi]

It really depends on how people go about it. When I'm out, I often like to study. I don't know how many people have tried to strike up conversations by either teasing me about this or mentioning how lonely I must be (I hate that even when I don't have my books, but especially when I do). I'm not an antisocial person either, and it's perfectly fine for someone to come up and talk to me more often than not (when it's finals, I do politely tell people I need to be left alone). But it's all in the presentation. "What are you studying/ you're really into that/ hey cool, I do the same thing" are all perfectly fine openers most of the time. But, I've actually had guys who, instead of doing this, do the former and I've had one decide to try setting my messenger bag on fire.

Yes, we sometimes misjudge people's intentions, but this happens when you get bombarded with assholes constantly.

I know. I would have said the following earlier but class:

There's a way to do it that's creepy and/or obnoxious and there's a way to do it that's not creepy and/or obnoxious.

Creepy and/or obnoxious is going up to a person and saying "He-llo beautiful, you're so beautiful, what is someone like you doing alone tonight?" and ordering a drink for her right off the bat before she can object. It's going up to a person and saying "Hey, why not give me a smile?" right off the bat. Stuff like that.

Not creep/obnoxious is going up to a person and saying "Hi, I noticed that you looked a bit lonely. Do you mind if I join you?" or "Hey, I noticed that you were <doing x activity> and I'm interested in learning more about it, do you want to teach me?" or something similar. And then assuming that she accepts and after getting to know each other better, offer to buy her a drink.

The problem is that there's some people who do the latter, or who just poke her to tell her that she dropped something (e.g. a wallet), and the girl reacting as if he was about to rape her or something. And then we have those asshole who think that doing the latter means that she has to give him sex. Both of them which suck.

Yeah, I do see what you're saying, and it does suck. But remember that people have bad days, and we never know what's going on in someone's head.

Case in point, not too long ago, I was in an extreme hurry to get out of a nightclub because something horrible had just happened to me. A guy angrily turned to me and goes, "that's to not say excuse me when moving past someone". I replied as best I could, "I'm sorry, something horrible has just happened, I'm not myself and just trying get out of here NOW." He could see something was wrong, immediately backed off and even helped make a bit of a hole. I guess it's lucky for both of us that I was able to articulate at that moment why I wasn't behaving in an appropriate way.

"You look lonely" is a particular pet peeve for me, and I realise that's not necessarily going to be true for others. Ironically, one of the best openers someone gave me was, "I bet you get so sick of people asking you if you're lonely".

There's also the problem that I do generally start off being rather polite about not wanting to talk (if I don't want to), and if/when the person doesn't leave, I have to get a bit more direct, then sometimes a lot more direct. Then I'm the bitch. Then I spend the rest of the night feeling bad. Or I let the person sit there and talk my ear off and get angry that someone has ruined my night. So running into those creeps make it kind of lose/lose for me.

I'd like to think those experiences never make me a bit ruder or a lot ruder to the next well meaning guy, but I'm sure it has. I'm a person, and I can be mean, clueless and misjudge people just as much as the next.

[The Emerald Dawn]

I live near there, yes. We frequently go to bars/pubs there because there is fuckall worth in the small town I live in.

I've probably lived near you then at some point. Never actually lived in Portland proper, but always nearby until I left the US.

Anyway, yeah I can totally see in your experience that you've never had issues with your particular opener for a number of reasons. You're most likely going to be in places where that kind of comment will be well recieved. And you (most likely) having an accent probably helps more than you know. You could wander up and say "golden walnuts!" to people, and most PDXers will still stop and engage in conversation because you sound cool.

Indeed. I sang "She'll be Comin' Round the Mountain" once, in my lilt, and ended up getting free drinks for the rest of the evening.

[Cannot think of a name]

I live near there, yes. We frequently go to bars/pubs there because there is fuckall worth in the small town I live in.

I've probably lived near you then at some point. Never actually lived in Portland proper, but always nearby until I left the US.

Anyway, yeah I can totally see in your experience that you've never had issues with your particular opener for a number of reasons. You're most likely going to be in places where that kind of comment will be well recieved. And you (most likely) having an accent probably helps more than you know. You could wander up and say "golden walnuts!" to people, and most PDXers will still stop and engage in conversation because you sound cool.

I broke down in Portland once. I bought a dude a drink who lent me the tool I needed...Well, I gave him ten bucks because I was still driving and don't drink, so I gave him money to buy a drink which isn't as friendly but he took it all the same.

[The Emerald Dawn]

I've probably lived near you then at some point. Never actually lived in Portland proper, but always nearby until I left the US.

Anyway, yeah I can totally see in your experience that you've never had issues with your particular opener for a number of reasons. You're most likely going to be in places where that kind of comment will be well recieved. And you (most likely) having an accent probably helps more than you know. You could wander up and say "golden walnuts!" to people, and most PDXers will still stop and engage in conversation because you sound cool.

I broke down in Portland once. I bought a dude a drink who lent me the tool I needed...Well, I gave him ten bucks because I was still driving and don't drink, so I gave him money to buy a drink which isn't as friendly but he took it all the same.

A tenner can get you more than one microbrew. You gave him a good trade.

[Northern Dominus]

I live near there, yes. We frequently go to bars/pubs there because there is fuckall worth in the small town I live in.

I've probably lived near you then at some point. Never actually lived in Portland proper, but always nearby until I left the US.

Anyway, yeah I can totally see in your experience that you've never had issues with your particular opener for a number of reasons. You're most likely going to be in places where that kind of comment will be well recieved. And you (most likely) having an accent probably helps more than you know. You could wander up and say "golden walnuts!" to people, and most PDXers will still stop and engage in conversation because you sound cool.

Well shit, there was my problem in Blackpool, UK. I should have opened up every conversation with a big raucous "Howdy"... y'know, all ethnic-like.

[The Emerald Dawn]

I've probably lived near you then at some point. Never actually lived in Portland proper, but always nearby until I left the US.

Anyway, yeah I can totally see in your experience that you've never had issues with your particular opener for a number of reasons. You're most likely going to be in places where that kind of comment will be well recieved. And you (most likely) having an accent probably helps more than you know. You could wander up and say "golden walnuts!" to people, and most PDXers will still stop and engage in conversation because you sound cool.

Well shit, there was my problem in Blackpool, UK. I should have opened up every conversation with a big raucous "Howdy"... y'know, all ethnic-like.

Doesn't work the other way 'round. They'd likely spike you there for that.

[The Blaatschapen]

I've probably lived near you then at some point. Never actually lived in Portland proper, but always nearby until I left the US.

Anyway, yeah I can totally see in your experience that you've never had issues with your particular opener for a number of reasons. You're most likely going to be in places where that kind of comment will be well recieved. And you (most likely) having an accent probably helps more than you know. You could wander up and say "golden walnuts!" to people, and most PDXers will still stop and engage in conversation because you sound cool.

Well shit, there was my problem in Blackpool, UK. I should have opened up every conversation with a big raucous "Howdy"... y'know, all ethnic-like.

I'll now open every conversation abroad with http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kkMm7SOKCuk *nods*

[Cannot think of a name]

I broke down in Portland once. I bought a dude a drink who lent me the tool I needed...Well, I gave him ten bucks because I was still driving and don't drink, so I gave him money to buy a drink which isn't as friendly but he took it all the same.

A tenner can get you more than one microbrew. You gave him a good trade.

Well, thanks to the Mickey Mousing I was able to do on my VW, I was able to drive all the way to Seattle before the other thing I thought, "Maybe it will hold up" broke. But then, being a VW, it continued on all the way to Victoria BC on that broken bit.

I love my car.

So he earned it.

[The Emerald Dawn]

A tenner can get you more than one microbrew. You gave him a good trade.

Well, thanks to the Mickey Mousing I was able to do on my VW, I was able to drive all the way to Seattle before the other thing I thought, "Maybe it will hold up" broke. But then, being a VW, it continued on all the way to Victoria BC on that broken bit.

I love my car.

So he earned it.

Freaking bugs, those things will run on duct tape and burger grease.