Monkeys get vaccinated, then get autism

[Rubiconic Crossings V2 rev 1f]

Nah...its either food or sleep...

No, you're missing the obvious cause. It is the Sun, autism is like photosynthesis!

Plants get sunshine; linked to autism!

[SaintB]

If you had to think of how to cause the most amount of suffering with the fewest words, you couldn't get much further than "These vaccinations are a conspiracy.")

I can do it in three! "God wills it!"

[The Neo Soviet Empire]

I'm tired of this, they didn't get autism after they were vaccinated, they were DIAGNOSED after they were vaccinated.

100% percent of people who have autism drank water prior to getting autism. Water causes autism.

Could be breast milk?

Shame on you mothers.

[Jormengand]

My dad, as a teacher, has worked with a lot of autistic and other kids with similar conditions. He reckons everyone is on the autistic spectrum to one level or another, it's all a matter of scale.

Yeah, my sister thinks along similar lines. Also, even if these did cause autism, is it any worse than, I don't know, changing your hair colour? This scare assumes not only the veracity of incorrect science, but also that autistic people are somehow "substandard".

[Jormengand]

No, you're missing the obvious cause. It is the Sun, autism is like photosynthesis!

Plants get sunshine; linked to autism!

Can we test to see if the plants show signs of autism?

[Rubiconic Crossings V2 rev 1f]

Plants get sunshine; linked to autism!

Can we test to see if the plants show signs of autism?

Interviews should suffice...

[Johz]

Can we test to see if the plants show signs of autism?

Interviews should suffice...

Day 1 - Attempted to communicate with plant. Plant seemed surly and unresponsive.

Day 2 - Attempted to communicate with plant. Plant moved slightly, but otherwise remained silent.

Day 3 - Attempted to communicate with plant. Plant refused to speak.

Conclusive evidence, unless I'm very much mistaken.

[Rubiconic Crossings V2 rev 1f]

Interviews should suffice...

Day 1 - Attempted to communicate with plant. Plant seemed surly and unresponsive.

Day 2 - Attempted to communicate with plant. Plant moved slightly, but otherwise remained silent.

Day 3 - Attempted to communicate with plant. Plant refused to speak.

Conclusive evidence, unless I'm very much mistaken.

I'm convinced.

[United Marxist Nations]

Interviews should suffice...

Day 1 - Attempted to communicate with plant. Plant seemed surly and unresponsive.

Day 2 - Attempted to communicate with plant. Plant moved slightly, but otherwise remained silent.

Day 3 - Attempted to communicate with plant. Plant refused to speak.

Conclusive evidence, unless I'm very much mistaken.

The Discovery Institute would be very interested in publishing your study.

[Blazedtown]

If monkeys have the strength of ten men and retards have the strength of 10 men, does that mean they just created retarded monkey super heroes?

[Risottia]

Even if vaccines did cause autism (they don't), the relative incidence of it compared to the enormous number of lives saved by universal vaccination would greatly outweigh such a side effect. Herd immunity gaiz, it's important.

Then again, if we found a way to have the most stupid humans NOT using vaccines while the less stupid humans would continue to use them, we'd raise significantly the intelligence of the average human specimen in just a generation or two.

[Dempublicents1]

Even if vaccines did cause autism (they don't), the relative incidence of it compared to the enormous number of lives saved by universal vaccination would greatly outweigh such a side effect. Herd immunity gaiz, it's important.

Then again, if we found a way to have the most stupid humans NOT using vaccines while the less stupid humans would continue to use them, we'd raise significantly the intelligence of the average human specimen in just a generation or two.

If you have a significant part of the population that doesn't receive the vaccine for a contagious disease, you do not have herd immunity. This allows the disease to propagate which can, in turn, mean that it mutates enough to get around the vaccine. Not to mention the fact that some people cannot receive vaccines for health reasons. Those people can be protected by herd immunity - but not if you aren't vaccinating enough people to have it.

[Freedom of United Trevor]

Autism happens in pregnancy not the shots.

If you have any type of autism your born with it,no cure.

I have Aspergers and I was born with it.

[United Kingdom of Poland]

I'll believe it when I get autism from a vaccine

[Franklin Delano Bluth]

Yes, if you don't wear your seatbelt it is possible that you might have difficulty, or being unable altogether, to escape from a situation where immediate escape is imperative. But the chances of you being in an accident such as that are significantly smaller than the chances of you being in an accident where the seatbelt would save you.

[The Humanist Federation]

I'm surprised that there aren't any fervent anti vaccination types on NSG. I am pleasantly surprised.

[Casanovak]

I speak here as a person on the autistic spectrum, and that this is silly. Everyone has some traits of autism, whether they like it or not. Autism, as far as I'm aware, is genetic, considering both of my parents are assumed to have Aspergers' Symdrome, while my youngest brother has been diagnosed. It's bad enough that that doctor said vaccines cause autism, because it doesn't. Autism is not something that occurs just because you get a vaccine. I hate stuff like this, when so-called doctors claim that autism is caused by vaccines.

But that's a better theory (sarcasm) than the one that says autism is caused by lack of hugs by mothers (yes, I have read a medical website that says this. This website also says girls cannot have autism. I am a girl).

[Avenio]

I'm surprised that there aren't any fervent anti vaccination types on NSG. I am pleasantly surprised.

I think we had one or two a while back, but they were one-topic wonders, if memory serves.

[Franklin Delano Bluth]

I speak here as a person on the autistic spectrum, and that this is silly. Everyone has some traits of autism, whether they like it or not. Autism, as far as I'm aware, is genetic, considering both of my parents are assumed to have Aspergers' Symdrome, while my youngest brother has been diagnosed. It's bad enough that that doctor said vaccines cause autism, because it doesn't. Autism is not something that occurs just because you get a vaccine. I hate stuff like this, when so-called doctors claim that autism is caused by vaccines.

But that's a better theory (sarcasm) than the one that says autism is caused by lack of hugs by mothers (yes, I have read a medical website that says this. This website also says girls cannot have autism. I am a girl).

Apparently, Temple Grandin is not an actual thing.

[Jolleus]

I once saw a Penn and Teller video in which two hundred pins were set up, one hundred in each of two squares. One square had a plastic barrier labeled "VACCINATIONS" in front of it. In the process of pushing the vaccination barrier in place, one pin was accidentally knocked out of the square--representing a kid that got autism. Then, Penn and Teller started throwing balls with labels such as "Polio," "Tetanus," "Chicken Pox," etc. at the squares. They all bounced harmlessly off of the plastic barrier on the vaccinated side... but about 70-80% of the pins on the other side got knocked over by the balls thrown. It was a nice analogy to show that even if--IF--vaccinations have a risk of causing autism, it's way better to have to give treatment to one retarded kid than eighty other kids with severe illnesses.

[Caffeinetopia]

... and how did they go about diagnosing autism in monkeys?

[Franklin Delano Bluth]

I once saw a Penn and Teller video in which two hundred pins were set up, one hundred in each of two squares. One square had a plastic barrier labeled "VACCINATIONS" in front of it. In the process of pushing the vaccination barrier in place, one pin was accidentally knocked out of the square--representing a kid that got autism. Then, Penn and Teller started throwing balls with labels such as "Polio," "Tetanus," "Chicken Pox," etc. at the squares. They all bounced harmlessly off of the plastic barrier on the vaccinated side... but about 70-80% of the pins on the other side got knocked over by the balls thrown. It was a nice analogy to show that even if--IF--vaccinations have a risk of causing autism, it's way better to have to give treatment to one retarded kid than eighty other kids with severe illnesses.

Indeed, as I said:

Yes, if you don't wear your seatbelt it is possible that you might have difficulty, or being unable altogether, to escape from a situation where immediate escape is imperative. But the chances of you being in an accident such as that are significantly smaller than the chances of you being in an accident where the seatbelt would save you.

[Condunum]

Humans are autismal as fuck regardless. I think a more important question is if humans would become double autistic or something.

People who think I'm being serious are twits.

I am outraged severely at this assumption. I AM AUTISTIC?

[Pope Joan]

I am one of the tinfoil hat conspiracy theorists that suspect vaccines are more harmful than "they" want us to believe. Anecdote: A close friend took his healthy little boy for a super combined all-in-one vaccination, and within hours he was another person, crying, screaming, lashing out. He has never been the same.

What makes me most suspicious is all the big bucks involved. when corporate profit and public policy collude, watch out, everday citizen. Astro Zenica is it? Some place like that. THe public health equivalent of the banks that were "too big to fail", so we basically let them get away with murder.

[Salandriagado]

It was a nice analogy to show that even if--IF--vaccinations have a risk of causing autism, it's way better to have to give treatment to one retarded kid than eighty other kids with severe illnesses.

Autistic != retarded.