HAPPY ZOMBIE JESUS DAY

[Renascibilitas]

To the Christians that are offended:

Matthew 5:11-24 “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.''

[Drouga]

Heretics, all of you.

I worship the one true God, Crystal Dragon Ninja Pirate Robot Jesus.

Blasphemy! How dare you go against the holy and all powerful truth of the Flying Spaghetti Monster!

[Mavorpen]

Since when is it against Christianity to laugh?

It's not, but when you're making fun of our religion...

That's the core of a JOKE.

[Liriena]

I'm going to endure a lot of offensive references to the most holy holiday in my religion.

Yep. Me too.

Meh, it's only offensive if you let it be offensive.

I myself are hardly offended by stuff like "Raptor Jesus", the "Flying Spaghetti Monster" or the whole "Jesus was a Jew zombie". Hell, I'm not even offended when somebody calls the Catholic Church the world's largest pedophile organization.

In fact, I usually laugh at that stuff.

[Soviet Canuckistan]

This is offensive, this christian holiday is to remember what Jesus did for Christians not to play violent games which encourage breaking of the commandments and beatitudes, shame, Hossaim, shame.

Why should i follow a set of "rules" written in some old book by a hermit 2000 years ago? If there was a list of Hogwarts rules in a Harry Potter book should i randomly follow them to?

How was he a hermit, he was a prominent public figure with rules that can guide all of humanity to a better place and to start getting to that better place he died for us and came back to show us his power.

[Rupudska]

Heretics, all of you.

I worship the one true God, Crystal Dragon Ninja Pirate Robot Jesus.

The One True God is the Flying Spaghetti Monster, unbeliever!

No, no. He's the Holy Spirit.

THE MODERN HOLY TRINITY: GODDESS MADOKA, CRYSTAL DRAGON NINJA PIRATE ZOMBIE ROBOT RAPTOR JESUS, FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER.

Believe in it. Or go to Hell. Your choice.

[Bataron]

Why should i follow a set of "rules" written in some old book by a hermit 2000 years ago? If there was a list of Hogwarts rules in a Harry Potter book should i randomly follow them to?

You sir simply do not understand the makings of this "old book."

[Genivaria]

Honestly, some people take things too seriously.

[The Akkadian Empire]

... Wha?

I didn't make my paragraph properly, at all it seems, my mistake.

I meant to say that the food, such as breads, soups and stews, and other commodities, had nothing to do with going to the store and "buying them" so you could instantly bring them into church. And that bread was baked, soups made from scratch, et cetera. Because this is tradition that goes back ninety seven years to the foundation of our church.

That was a horrid mistake.

[Yes Im Biop]

I'm going to endure a lot of offensive references to the most holy holiday in my religion.

This.

I'll probably also spend some of my day wondering why 90% of atheists are perfectly fine people and why 10% are complete dicks.

Sounds like america huh? Only the other way around

[Rupudska]

Honestly, some people take things too seriously.

Exactly. It's just past midnight, and already my family is drunk out of their minds.

>:D

[Conserative Morality]

Happy Zombie Jesus Day!

The people who can't stand the mild mockery of calling it Zombie Jesus Day need to lighten up. I know I wasn't that prickly when I was a Christian.

[Mavorpen]

How was he a hermit, he was a prominent public figure with rules that can guide all of humanity to a better place and to start getting to that better place he died for us and came back to show us his power.

How can his rules guide us to a better place? I see no major philosophical theories or tangents he contributed to the world. All of his moral philosophies that people praise were thought of centuries before him. You want a good role model? Buddha. The dude developed a philosophy of why suffering exists, a solution to it, and all without the, "GET ON UR NEES AND BE A SLAVE TO ME!"

[Genivaria]

Happy Zombie Jesus Day!

The people who can't stand the mild mockery of calling it Zombie Jesus Day need to lighten up. I know I wasn't that prickly when I was a Christian.

Nor was I.

[Soviet Canuckistan]

We would all not be here if it was not for God, how did the Big Bang start, something called God, who's very word is guidance for humanity but some choose to ignore it and mock it and desecrate it.

[Renascibilitas]

Why should i follow a set of "rules" written in some old book by a hermit 2000 years ago? If there was a list of Hogwarts rules in a Harry Potter book should i randomly follow them to?

How was he a hermit, he was a prominent public figure with rules that can guide all of humanity to a better place and to start getting to that better place he died for us and came back to show us his power.

One sentence from a Jainist prophet has morality in it than the entirety of the the Bible.

[Rupudska]

Happy Zombie Jesus Day!

The people who can't stand the mild mockery of calling it Zombie Jesus Day need to lighten up. I know I wasn't that prickly when I was a Christian.

I'm still Christian, and I join into the mockery to a degree.

[Renascibilitas]

We would all not be here if it was not for God, how did the Big Bang start, something called God, who's very word is guidance for humanity but some choose to ignore it and mock it and desecrate it.

There's a very large gap between God existing and Christianity.

[Fedeledland]

That is a bad question, to say the least.

You may not be able to fathom it, but I am a proud Christian, I believe that God almighty exists, and I believe Jesus Christ is his son and the Messiah. Ergo, I believe that since God exists, all the things possible to create such a feast would not exist (just as we would not exist).

this^
Our society has changed this holiday into one of money not rejoicing and remembering in our Saviour, this wouldn't be possible without it, it would just be another April 7th without him.

So basically you're basing Easter off the belief that God made everything and hence without him the feast would not exist, let alone humanity (at which point it wouldn't matter anyways)?

Quite a tenuous celebration, and not one to get worked over in a rpthread joking about Jesus.

Why should i follow a set of "rules" written in some old book by a hermit 2000 years ago? If there was a list of Hogwarts rules in a Harry Potter book should i randomly follow them to?

You sir simply do not understand the makings of this "old book."

A book whose basics are unchanged since the collapse of the Roman Empire, yet we're supposed to follow its orders?

Which such time since its conception, it should be considered obsolete.

[Genivaria]

We would all not be here if it was not for God, how did the Big Bang start, something called God, who's very word is guidance for humanity but some choose to ignore it and mock it and desecrate it.

Proof or GTFO.

[Soviet Canuckistan]

How was he a hermit, he was a prominent public figure with rules that can guide all of humanity to a better place and to start getting to that better place he died for us and came back to show us his power.

How can his rules guide us to a better place? I see no major philosophical theories or tangents he contributed to the world. All of his moral philosophies that people praise were thought of centuries before him. You want a good role model? Buddha. The dude developed a philosophy of why suffering exists, a solution to it, and all without the, "GET ON UR NEES AND BE A SLAVE TO ME!"

So thou shalt not kill isn't a good guideline for humanity, to respect thy neighbour, to respect creation, how are those not good rules.

[Mavorpen]

We would all not be here if it was not for God, how did the Big Bang start, something called God, who's very word is guidance for humanity but some choose to ignore it and mock it and desecrate it.

Two branes collided, and created out brane universe. A ten dimensional universe broke apart into a 6 dimensional universe and a four dimensional universe. Quantum physics. There, you have several answers. You know nothing about science so you automatically go to God.

[The Akkadian Empire]

To the Christians that are offended:

Matthew 5:11-24 “Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me. Rejoice and be glad, because great is your reward in heaven, for in the same way they persecuted the prophets who were before you.''

Don't quote Scripture if you're just going to use it to give yourself license to insult members of the Christian Faith and the Faith itself.

[Soviet Canuckistan]

We would all not be here if it was not for God, how did the Big Bang start, something called God, who's very word is guidance for humanity but some choose to ignore it and mock it and desecrate it.

Proof or GTFO.

What's physics' proof God didn't start it.

[Vaklor]

We would all not be here if it was not for God, how did the Big Bang start, something called God, who's very word is guidance for humanity but some choose to ignore it and mock it and desecrate it.

How did god start? If you question the big bang you have to answer that
there are more plotholes in the bible then there are in ME3's ending