Self-acceptance.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

First off, let me just make it clear that this has nothing to do with me. Second, let us keep it as much on topic as we possibly can. Third, if it's possible, be as sincere (not transparent), but as sincere as you can.

The premise is, I was watching something I haven't seen in a while and the characters touched the subject of acceptance. Self-acceptance at that. It was discussed that in order to accept ourselves, perhaps we need to find that we are accepted by others. That we need to be told by others that we are liked, that we posses good qualities. That, in order to grow comfortable in our skin, we perhaps need to simply be told that we are loved.

Wrapping it up, that if we are only told of our defects, that we may never come to accept that we are ok. Nationstates, what do you think of this? Is it true, can we find acceptance only when we are told by others that we are liked or is it possible to find self-acceptance just by thinking we are indeed ok?

[Greed and Death]

I love my defects. Where would I be with out my temper and alcoholism.

[The Beautiful Darkness]

It's the other way around. If we accept ourselves, others will accept us.

[Fartsniffage]

It's the other way around. If we accept ourselves, others will accept us.

This.

Belief in oneself gets you much further than relying on others.

[Treznor]

It's the other way around. If we accept ourselves, others will accept us.

I half-agree. We must first accept ourselves, without trying to gloss over the good or the bad (yes, some people will gloss over the good parts of themselves and focus on the bad). That doesn't mean anyone else will accept us, but it ought to make it easier for us to get along with them. Change begins within, not from without.

[The Beautiful Darkness]

It's the other way around. If we accept ourselves, others will accept us.

I half-agree. We must first accept ourselves, without trying to gloss over the good or the bad (yes, some people will gloss over the good parts of themselves and focus on the bad). That doesn't mean anyone else will accept us, but it ought to make it easier for us to get along with them. Change begins within, not from without.

If we don't accept ourselves, how can anyone else be expected to do so?

[Greed and Death]

It's the other way around. If we accept ourselves, others will accept us.

I half-agree. We must first accept ourselves, without trying to gloss over the good or the bad (yes, some people will gloss over the good parts of themselves and focus on the bad). That doesn't mean anyone else will accept us, but it ought to make it easier for us to get along with them. Change begins within, not from without.

If we don't accept ourselves, how can anyone else be expected to do so?

They accept the image presented to them. which of course creates more difficulty in accepting one's self, for any viewers as the image projected out is almost always an attempt to look perfect.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

I love my defects. Where would I be with out my temper and alcoholism.

Defects and virtues make who we are. They also make the way we are viewed by others. I'm not saying these are inherently bad. What I was wondering was, acceptance be achieved by our power or is it a combination of ourselves and those around us?

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

It's the other way around. If we accept ourselves, others will accept us.

I accept the way I am, but I know I am not always accepted by others. I get what you're saying, I agree with it a 100%, but this os not always the case for people.

[Ashmoria]

i think that it has to be both affirmation from within and from without.

few people can learn to accept themselves as good people worthy of being loved if they are constantly told otherwise. it takes enormous inner strength and resiliance to be able to do that.

but just being told isnt enough. you have to learn to accept your faults and imperfections. to see realize if other people arent perfect and are still worthy of love then you are too.

[Fartsniffage]

i think that it has to be both affirmation from within and from without.

few people can learn to accept themselves as good people worthy of being loved if they are constantly told otherwise. it takes enormous inner strength and resiliance to be able to do that.

but just being told isnt enough. you have to learn to accept your faults and imperfections. to see realize if other people arent perfect and are still worthy of love then you are too.

Dammit, thank you.

I spent 5 minutes staring at the screen trying to remember the word "affirmation".

[Greed and Death]

I love my defects. Where would I be with out my temper and alcoholism.

Defects and virtues make who we are. They also make the way we are viewed by others. I'm not saying these are inherently bad. What I was wondering was, acceptance be achieved by our power or is it a combination of ourselves and those around us?

Yes the acceptance brings power.
Say your in a life threatening spot like a solider, police officer, or fire fighter might face.
Every sane person is scared.
The brave are not the ones who ignore their fear, but the ones who accept it.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

i think that it has to be both affirmation from within and from without.

few people can learn to accept themselves as good people worthy of being loved if they are constantly told otherwise. it takes enormous inner strength and resiliance to be able to do that.

but just being told isnt enough. you have to learn to accept your faults and imperfections. to see realize if other people arent perfect and are still worthy of love then you are too.

Exactly. And in this self-acceptance, one does grows stronger. Because although we cannot be perfect, even when society seems to ask that of us constantly, we are worthy of love. And even if love is a strong concept at the moment, at least, we are worthy of being liked and respected by others.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

I love my defects. Where would I be with out my temper and alcoholism.

Defects and virtues make who we are. They also make the way we are viewed by others. I'm not saying these are inherently bad. What I was wondering was, acceptance be achieved by our power or is it a combination of ourselves and those around us?

Yes the acceptance brings power.
Say your in a life threatening spot like a solider, police officer, or fire fighter might face.
Every sane person is scared.
The brave are not the ones who ignore their fear, but the ones who accept it.

But even those who ignore the fear are worthy of acceptance. Don't you think? Bravery isn't something everyone is capable of.

[Greed and Death]

I love my defects. Where would I be with out my temper and alcoholism.

Defects and virtues make who we are. They also make the way we are viewed by others. I'm not saying these are inherently bad. What I was wondering was, acceptance be achieved by our power or is it a combination of ourselves and those around us?

Yes the acceptance brings power.
Say your in a life threatening spot like a solider, police officer, or fire fighter might face.
Every sane person is scared.
The brave are not the ones who ignore their fear, but the ones who accept it.

But even those who ignore the fear are worthy of acceptance. Don't you think? Bravery isn't something everyone is capable of.

Everyone is capable of bravery, just the manner in which they are brave is different.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

I love my defects. Where would I be with out my temper and alcoholism.

Defects and virtues make who we are. They also make the way we are viewed by others. I'm not saying these are inherently bad. What I was wondering was, acceptance be achieved by our power or is it a combination of ourselves and those around us?

Yes the acceptance brings power.
Say your in a life threatening spot like a solider, police officer, or fire fighter might face.
Every sane person is scared.
The brave are not the ones who ignore their fear, but the ones who accept it.

But even those who ignore the fear are worthy of acceptance. Don't you think? Bravery isn't something everyone is capable of.

Everyone is capable of bravery, just the manner in which they are brave is different.

Interesting. Care to expand this?

[Ashmoria]

i think that it has to be both affirmation from within and from without.

few people can learn to accept themselves as good people worthy of being loved if they are constantly told otherwise. it takes enormous inner strength and resiliance to be able to do that.

but just being told isnt enough. you have to learn to accept your faults and imperfections. to see realize if other people arent perfect and are still worthy of love then you are too.

Exactly. And in this self-acceptance, one does grows stronger. Because although we cannot be perfect, even when society seems to ask that of us constantly, we are worthy of love. And even if love is a strong concept at the moment, at least, we are worthy of being liked and respected by others.

yes

its a terrible spot to be in when you dont think that you are worthy. it ruins all your relationships because you dont really believe that your friend are your friends or at least that they will stop being your friends when they realize what a bad person you are.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

i think that it has to be both affirmation from within and from without.

few people can learn to accept themselves as good people worthy of being loved if they are constantly told otherwise. it takes enormous inner strength and resiliance to be able to do that.

but just being told isnt enough. you have to learn to accept your faults and imperfections. to see realize if other people arent perfect and are still worthy of love then you are too.

Exactly. And in this self-acceptance, one does grows stronger. Because although we cannot be perfect, even when society seems to ask that of us constantly, we are worthy of love. And even if love is a strong concept at the moment, at least, we are worthy of being liked and respected by others.

yes

its a terrible spot to be in when you dont think that you are worthy. it ruins all your relationships because you dont really believe that your friend are your friends or at least that they will stop being your friends when they realize what a bad person you are.

That's because we fear to disappoint. I guess what we all fail to see at one point or another is that we're just human and that we are going to disappoint. It happens. What shouldn't happen though is that that disappointment we have caused robs us of the concept of worth. That it is so ok to be scared. That it is ok to be full of valor, to go back to one of the things Greed and Death mentioned, that it is ok to disappoint. That it is ok to be human.

[Greed and Death]

I love my defects. Where would I be with out my temper and alcoholism.

Defects and virtues make who we are. They also make the way we are viewed by others. I'm not saying these are inherently bad. What I was wondering was, acceptance be achieved by our power or is it a combination of ourselves and those around us?

Yes the acceptance brings power.
Say your in a life threatening spot like a solider, police officer, or fire fighter might face.
Every sane person is scared.
The brave are not the ones who ignore their fear, but the ones who accept it.

But even those who ignore the fear are worthy of acceptance. Don't you think? Bravery isn't something everyone is capable of.

Everyone is capable of bravery, just the manner in which they are brave is different.

Interesting. Care to expand this?

Well for instance Gandhi compared to a special forces solider.
Gandhi was willing to let someone kill him, for his beliefs.
The solider is ready to kill someone else for his beliefs. Gandhi could not be the solider, and the solider could never be Gandhi.
Their courage is perhaps equal, but totally different.
Even doing your specific duty in life takes courage, no matter how insignificant it appears to be. Ask for instance a janitor about the things he has cleaned up in his time.
We all are brave in our own way because to some degree we all walk our own path.

[Royal New Britannia]

Yet modern day society would see us cast off individual feelings and emotions and drive us towards what they deem as 'the model citizen'.
This is what democracy strives for, what it requires to be stable.

[Buffett and Colbert]

Perfectionists need a support group...

[Smunkeeville]

First off, let me just make it clear that this has nothing to do with me. Second, let us keep it as much on topic as we possibly can. Third, if it's possible, be as sincere (not transparent), but as sincere as you can.

The premise is, I was watching something I haven't seen in a while and the characters touched the subject of acceptance. Self-acceptance at that. It was discussed that in order to accept ourselves, perhaps we need to find that we are accepted by others. That we need to be told by others that we are liked, that we posses good qualities. That, in order to grow comfortable in our skin, we perhaps need to simply be told that we are loved.

Wrapping it up, that if we are only told of our defects, that we may never come to accept that we are ok. Nationstates, what do you think of this? Is it true, can we find acceptance only when we are told by others that we are liked or is it possible to find self-acceptance just by thinking we are indeed ok?

I think it's bullshit. If you can't like yourself independently of other's opinions of you then you should just give up. Not everyone is going to like you. You have to be someone that you are okay with. If you're constantly going around looking for other's approval then you're going to be very depressed most of your life.

*general you.

[Kamsaki]

I think the idea of self-acceptance is a difficult one to come by. In a very real sense, I still don't accept myself. I'm not perfect - heck, I'm barely independently functional. The point is to realise that you don't have to accept yourself in order to move forward. In my case, indeed, it is only in constant self-renewal that I consider myself to be progressing. I constantly submit myself to critique, but do so not in the intention of destroying me but in making me stronger.

I don't expect to be accepted by others. I don't accept me anyway, so it's probably not reasonable for them to do so. But I do know that I'm constantly improving through understanding my flaws and building on them, and each trial I face is something I come out of better off. The point at which I become "Okay" is the point at which I lose the drive to improve, and personally, I'm not sure that that's a point I want to come to. My weaknesses may not be something to be proud of, but without the challenge of facing them, life would probably be pretty boring.

[Rhodmhire]

I am a defect.

Therefore, well, I'll let you figure it out.

[Taeshan]

It's the other way around. If we accept ourselves, others will accept us.

BRAVO.