Girlfriends' dads

[Karolyland]

So you and your GF open minded and stuff ???
I could bring my taser.

Shut up. *smacks greed and death upside the head*
Thats no way to speak to a lady.

Lady? Where?

Sorry, I swing exclusively in the direction of my girlfriend

[Genivaria]

Shut up. *smacks greed and death upside the head*
Thats no way to speak to a lady.

Lady? Where?

Sorry, I swing exclusively in the direction of my girlfriend

That doesn't make you any less of a lady.

[Christmahanikwanzikah]

I figured.

[/pretending to know what the fuck is going on]

Its ok. Better to stay silent and be thought ignorant, then to speak and remove all doubt.

On an interesting side note, I practice the latter on a daily basis with respect to humor.

[Genivaria]

Its ok. Better to stay silent and be thought ignorant, then to speak and remove all doubt.

On an interesting side note, I practice the latter on a daily basis with respect to humor.

Ah well if its for humor then your forgiven as I do that often.

[Greed and Death]

Shut up. *smacks greed and death upside the head*
Thats no way to speak to a lady.

Lady? Where?

Sorry, I swing exclusively in the direction of my girlfriend

Did you say Swinger??

[Kobeanare]

Why do so many guys still think that it's up to a girl's father to decide if you are allowed to date her?

I've had a couple of different guys that were interested in me, but then got absurdly nervous about the possibility that my dad might not approve. None of them has ever been concerned that my mom might have a problem with them.

It's really not helpful to be so paranoid. If you're dating a girl and she's worried about what her dad thinks, then you have a reason to be concerned; but otherwise you're just making things more nerve-wracking than they need to be. If it seems like a guy is more concerned about my dad's opinion than mine, that causes problems in the relationship.

Ladies, do your dads chase away would-be boyfriends, or did they chase away would-be boyfriends when you were younger?

Because there are still some points of honor left to men?

After I proposed to my wife, I asked my father-in-law for permission to marry my wife. It is a point of honor, still held by some of us, surrounded by those, who far too often, have forgotten honor.

I assume that by 'honor' you mean 'the idea that women are property'?

[Samozaryadnyastan]

Has anyone linked the Cracked article on this yet?
That's why we're all scared. Some more so than others.

[Risottia]

Why do so many guys still think that it's up to a girl's father to decide if you are allowed to date her?

Lolwut?

[Gauntleted Fist]

Why do so many guys still think that it's up to a girl's father to decide if you are allowed to date her?

I don't think it's up to him, but I would rather not cause undue friction between my girlfriend and her family. If I have to follow some arcane ritual to help prevent that, I'm perfectly fine with it.

[GeneralHaNor]

Why do so many guys still think that it's up to a girl's father to decide if you are allowed to date her?

I've had a couple of different guys that were interested in me, but then got absurdly nervous about the possibility that my dad might not approve. None of them has ever been concerned that my mom might have a problem with them.

It's really not helpful to be so paranoid. If you're dating a girl and she's worried about what her dad thinks, then you have a reason to be concerned; but otherwise you're just making things more nerve-wracking than they need to be. If it seems like a guy is more concerned about my dad's opinion than mine, that causes problems in the relationship.

Ladies, do your dads chase away would-be boyfriends, or did they chase away would-be boyfriends when you were younger?

Because your Mother is less likely to cave in my skull if she doesn't approve me.

Fathers represent a physical threat to your potential boyfriends safety, damm straight he's gonna seek his approval.

[Distruzio]

Only if she either still resides with her parents or is quite close with them. I also tend to ask her parents for permission rather than her father alone. I do it out of respect for their time invested in cultivating and raising a person worthy of my affection. She obviously displays some qualities that satisfy my requirements out of a mate and I wouldn't have it implied that those qualities were formed in a vacuum free of influence from her parents.

In short, I ask for permission to thank them for creating so wonderful a being.

[GeneralHaNor]

Only if she either still resides with her parents or is quite close with them. I also tend to ask her parents for permission rather than her father alone. I do it out of respect for their time invested in cultivating and raising a person worthy of my affection. She obviously displays some qualities that satisfy my requirements out of a mate and I wouldn't have it implied that those qualities were formed in a vacuum free of influence from her parents.

In short, I ask for permission to thank them for creating so wonderful a being.

Meh, I'm just doing it to cover my ass, future in-laws should like you, or at least be civil.

If I showed up to dinner and told the old man it's none of his god-damm business whether or not I'm having sex with his daughter. I'd probably end up on the wrong end of a shotgun.

[Ethel mermania]

It shouldn't surprise you that there are Nazi women. SOMEONE has to give birth to the next generation of Aryan Übermenschen! I do love the idea of Nazi men having themselves surgically modified so they could become pregnant, but I don't think they would go for it... It wouldn't do to have Hitler pregnant at a public appearance! He has his image to think of.

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Damn you! I'm going to have an image of a 9-month, barefoot, and preggers Hitler stuck in my head for the rest of the DAY!

I never thought of it, but if adolph were kept barefoot and pregnant, the world would be a better place.

[Tsaraine]

It shouldn't surprise you that there are Nazi women. SOMEONE has to give birth to the next generation of Aryan Übermenschen! I do love the idea of Nazi men having themselves surgically modified so they could become pregnant, but I don't think they would go for it... It wouldn't do to have Hitler pregnant at a public appearance! He has his image to think of.

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Damn you! I'm going to have an image of a 9-month, barefoot, and preggers Hitler stuck in my head for the rest of the DAY!

And now, ladies and übermenschen, I shall share the revelation with which I shattered NERVUN's mind on IRC:

Rule 34 surely applies to that mental image too. Somewhere out there is fanart of sexy barefoot preggers Hitler.

... Perhaps it's better that Hitler never managed to breed. Can you imagine the sort of prospective father-in-law he'd make?

[Talad]

I've always been scared as hell of my girlfriends fathers. But more-so because they have more often than not been the traditional type and I've always been sort of...un-traditional? I can see why guys would want the "honor" of being "allowed" to date a girl but honestly I don't see the need for it. We have evolved as a species and must evolve with the times. It's fine for a father to be protective of his daughter but if she really likes a guy and if he's not a scumbag then I see no reason why they shouldn't date, permission or not.

[Highrcul]

It really is just a point of honour, more to the point 'it is the right thing to be done'. You really dont understand how men work if you are dismissing this practice as reactionary nonsense. Consider most dads are nearly always anxious when their little girl is growing up, its an almost instinctual protective reaction and, especially in the case of the modern world, a dad is perfectly justified in worrying about the kind of guy his little girl will be going out with. And to a prospective husband, how the dad reacts to his daughter being with a man will be the precurser stage to their future relationship as in-laws, and the protectiveness of the dad is positive in potentially scaring away partners who would be abusive, even to the point where the father would 'forbid relationships', another old practice that ties into this one that is equally valid. When a guy wants to go out with a girl and he is worried about what her dad will think of him, this is a sign of good character.

Want to know why?

Because he gives enough of a shit about the girl and where she comes from to want to acknowledge and honour her family to ask the father's permission for marriage. It reaffirms the dad's trust that the guy his daughter is with is 'good people' because he has the courage and humility to suck up his pride and ask, (even if he has convinced the dad long ago that he is 'good people' then asking for permission would be sealing the deal and the dad's opinion of him into stone in a positive light), and then there is the other more obvious factor, even if the old 'child ownership' thing is non-existant any more, this practice will and should be done both for the reasons that I have mentioned and because it is a symbolically acknowledging that the dad, once and potentially for all, will no longer be the central male figure in the girl's life and the asking for permission is the full coming to fruition of a relationship successfully upgrading into marriage and the man is acknowledging full responsibility for her happiness, accountable to her father and extended family. It is a very chivalrous and manly thing to do and quite frankly if you don't think your woman is worth going through this ceremonial business for, then what are you doing marrying her for?

I do not care about whether or not this is sexist, it is the right thing for guys to do, and it is very widespread throughout western society, any movie or show set in modern times or thereabouts where the male character goes through the 'old fashioned' motions when dating or marrying a female character, (regardless if he is a main character or not), he will be portrayed in a positive light or remarked upon as fond anachronism at worst if we are dealing with a show that generally lampoons old practices such as this. And this is saying something considering how most movies and shows deal with relationships. It really is a positive thing and something society as a whole needs a great deal more of.

[SD_Film Artists]

Other than the traditional 'asking for permission to marry his daughter' I haven't thought it as something to consider beyond having good manners. Fortunately I get along very well with my girlfriend's parents.

[Horsefish]

Doesn't bother me-I'd respect their rules and be polite if they lived with their parents but if they don't like me it then they don't. I can only be so charming.

[Bottle]

Why do so many guys still think that it's up to a girl's father to decide if you are allowed to date her?

I've had a couple of different guys that were interested in me, but then got absurdly nervous about the possibility that my dad might not approve. None of them has ever been concerned that my mom might have a problem with them.

It's really not helpful to be so paranoid. If you're dating a girl and she's worried about what her dad thinks, then you have a reason to be concerned; but otherwise you're just making things more nerve-wracking than they need to be. If it seems like a guy is more concerned about my dad's opinion than mine, that causes problems in the relationship.

Ladies, do your dads chase away would-be boyfriends, or did they chase away would-be boyfriends when you were younger?

I have nothing but contempt for men who behave that way toward their daughters, and I would go out of my way to disrespect any father who had that kind of bullshit attitude.

My dad, thankfully, is awesome. He cares about who I date because I'm his child and he wants me to be happy and safe, but that's as far as it goes. When my partner proposed to me, he mentioned that he hadn't asked my father's permission and he hoped that wouldn't offend anybody, and I nearly died laughing. If somebody asked my dad's permission, he'd tell them they probably shouldn't propose to me, because I'd rip them a new one and refuse to marry them on principle if I ever found out they had been following that kind of bullshit behavior.

[SD_Film Artists]

Why do so many guys still think that it's up to a girl's father to decide if you are allowed to date her?

I've had a couple of different guys that were interested in me, but then got absurdly nervous about the possibility that my dad might not approve. None of them has ever been concerned that my mom might have a problem with them.

It's really not helpful to be so paranoid. If you're dating a girl and she's worried about what her dad thinks, then you have a reason to be concerned; but otherwise you're just making things more nerve-wracking than they need to be. If it seems like a guy is more concerned about my dad's opinion than mine, that causes problems in the relationship.

Ladies, do your dads chase away would-be boyfriends, or did they chase away would-be boyfriends when you were younger?

I have nothing but contempt for men who behave that way toward their daughters, and I would go out of my way to disrespect any father who had that kind of bullshit attitude.

My dad, thankfully, is awesome. He cares about who I date because I'm his child and he wants me to be happy and safe, but that's as far as it goes. When my partner proposed to me, he mentioned that he hadn't asked my father's permission and he hoped that wouldn't offend anybody, and I nearly died laughing. If somebody asked my dad's permission, he'd tell them they probably shouldn't propose to me, because I'd rip them a new one and refuse to marry them on principle if I ever found out they had been following that kind of bullshit behavior.

Aye that's the best way for a parent to be- concerned but not controlling.

As for asking for a daughter's hand in marriage, I see it as a traditional and respectful tip-of-the-hat to the girl's parents rather than a Borat-style trade.

[Ashmoria]

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Damn you! I'm going to have an image of a 9-month, barefoot, and preggers Hitler stuck in my head for the rest of the DAY!

And now, ladies and übermenschen, I shall share the revelation with which I shattered NERVUN's mind on IRC:

Rule 34 surely applies to that mental image too. Somewhere out there is fanart of sexy barefoot preggers Hitler.

... Perhaps it's better that Hitler never managed to breed. Can you imagine the sort of prospective father-in-law he'd make?

i was going to make a joke about that being why stalin's daughter defected to the west but when i checked wikipedia i found this...

"At 16, Svetlana Alliluyeva fell in love with Aleksei Kapler, a Soviet filmmaker who was 40 years old. Her father vehemently disapproved of the romance. Later, Kapler was sentenced to ten years in exile in the industrial city of Vorkuta, near the Arctic Circle."

[Bottle]

As for asking for a daughter's hand in marriage, I see it as a traditional and respectful tip-of-the-hat to the girl's parents rather than a Borat-style trade.

I can't see any way that it wouldn't be horrific. It is nobody else's right to say whether or not I can get married, and anybody who thinks that somebody else has that authority is, by definition, a person who does not have sufficient respect for my autonomy. They are certainly not somebody who could be trusted to be a life-partner.

[Namabia]

Why do so many guys still think that it's up to a girl's father to decide if you are allowed to date her?

I've had a couple of different guys that were interested in me, but then got absurdly nervous about the possibility that my dad might not approve. None of them has ever been concerned that my mom might have a problem with them.

It's really not helpful to be so paranoid. If you're dating a girl and she's worried about what her dad thinks, then you have a reason to be concerned; but otherwise you're just making things more nerve-wracking than they need to be. If it seems like a guy is more concerned about my dad's opinion than mine, that causes problems in the relationship.

Ladies, do your dads chase away would-be boyfriends, or did they chase away would-be boyfriends when you were younger?

As a guy, I ask permission from the father. As said somewhere in the beginning, it's part of honor and respect. Typically back not even fifty years ago your father still slightly controlled your marriage. For those of us who still keep to the honor system, it pays off. It shows you have the respect enough for the girl you are dating to have good relations with her family.

Now Dads are very cautious about their little girl. Same for big-brothers. For some reason we see our daughters/sisters as gold, and if someone is taking her away we lose her forever. Hence the reason Dads and Brothers are very hyper-sensitive around dating.

[Erinkita]

As for asking for a daughter's hand in marriage, I see it as a traditional and respectful tip-of-the-hat to the girl's parents rather than a Borat-style trade.

I can't see any way that it wouldn't be horrific. It is nobody else's right to say whether or not I can get married, and anybody who thinks that somebody else has that authority is, by definition, a person who does not have sufficient respect for my autonomy. They are certainly not somebody who could be trusted to be a life-partner.

As I see it, it's more about seeking blessing and approval than actual permission. I can't imagine any man would call off an engagement because the father disapproved. He's going to be a member of the family from now on and want to start things on good terms, make sure he's actually welcome. The response he receives will determine the nature of his relationship with his father-in-law.

[SD_Film Artists]

I can't see any way that it wouldn't be horrific. It is nobody else's right to say whether or not I can get married, and anybody who thinks that somebody else has that authority is, by definition, a person who does not have sufficient respect for my autonomy. They are certainly not somebody who could be trusted to be a life-partner.

As I see it, it's more about seeking blessing and approval than actual permission. I can't imagine any man would call off an engagement because the father disapproved. He's going to be a member of the family from now on and want to start things on good terms, make sure he's actually welcome. The response he receives will determine the nature of his relationship with his father-in-law.

Exactly this ^