It's a Gay Life

[Mediterreania]

Indeed, genital crushing is fairly awful...

I had to laugh today, though, when a friend of mine got a soccer ball to the nuts.

You should play tennis.

[Niur]

Hi! And it's true that gay characters on TV, etc. never do anything gay... sucks

I know, it does! And if they are gay, they are either horribly stereotypical or straught gay. No inbetween ever.

[Buffett and Colbert]

It seems like this is predominantly commented on by the gay boys. I stress boys...

Nah all good.

Thank god. This thread needs moar tranz-men.

Anyway I think this thread would have been better being called "It's a queer life", I feel that queer is the best umbrella word we have.

It's supposed to be a pun...

[Galenaima]

It seems like this is predominantly commented on by the gay boys. I stress boys...

Nah all good.

My experience of being Lesbian identified for 5 years lead to me getting attacked by 6 people. Yaaaaaaaaaay! Also because I was on the butch/masculine end of the equation it meant I used to be received by the straight masses with much hostility.
Even if it appears that Lesbians are more 'accepted' they aren't. Not real ones anyway.
Women's sexuality is a joke to the mainstream. Also if you look at any gay male characters in the media, they de-sexualise them, to make them more palatable for masses. The ones who say "Hey, I'm not gay, but gays okay!" But revolt over the image of two men kissing.

I've changed since my butch lesbian days, now since transition. I appear as a slightly shorter than average male, pretty average Joe.
Though I always denied my true feelings, up until about 2 years ago. So now I'm just a queer Transman.
I work in a very heteronormative environment, but like to keep myself sexually ambiguous. It pisses the homophobes off so much.
I've already been assaulted for my sexuality. Wonder if it will happen due to me being transgendered? Potentially.

Though I only socialise with my fabulous queer friends, because even if the gay boys and the baby dykes don't understand the whole Trans-identity, they don't harass me.

I think my desire is simple, just let me be myself, and don't ask personal questions that dehumanise me.

Anyway I think this thread would have been better being called "It's a queer life", I feel that queer is the best umbrella word we have.

Yikes. We LGBTQ have a long way to go, even though we've covered a lot of ground.

If nobody'll be offended by the comparison, the Stonewall Riots were our Emancipation, so to say. Where's our great leader, then, to make us truly equal?

[Buffett and Colbert]

Hi! And it's true that gay characters on TV, etc. never do anything gay... sucks

I know, it does! And if they are gay, they are either horribly stereotypical or straught gay. No inbetween ever.

Well, Maxxie in Skins was was pretty awesome.

In fact, yesterday, a friend of mine said "All I want for birthday is Maxxie in a box."

[Tokos]

Hi! And it's true that gay characters on TV, etc. never do anything gay... sucks

I know, it does! And if they are gay, they are either horribly stereotypical or straught gay. No inbetween ever.

What's a "straight gay", a homosexual man who doesn't act like a bipolar Julian Clary for no reason other than it's apparently the done thing?

The whole "gay identity" I feel is very silly… I can't see how it does anything but harm.

[Niur]

I know, it does! And if they are gay, they are either horribly stereotypical or straught gay. No inbetween ever.

What's a "straight gay", a homosexual man who doesn't act like a bipolar Julian Clary for no reason other than it's apparently the done thing?

The whole "gay identity" I feel is very silly…

Straight gay is someone who by all estimates seems to be straight, in fact very much so meeting their gender norms, aside from the fact that it is said that they are gay.

[Buffett and Colbert]

What's a "straight gay", a homosexual man who doesn't act like a bipolar Julian Clary for no reason other than it's apparently the done thing?

The whole "gay identity" I feel is very silly…

Straight gay is someone who by all estimates seems to be straight, in fact very much so meeting their gender norms, aside from the fact that it is said that they are gay.

I think you mean "straight acting."

[Meryuma]

I know, it does! And if they are gay, they are either horribly stereotypical or straught gay. No inbetween ever.

Well, Maxxie in Skins was was pretty awesome.

In fact, yesterday, a friend of mine said "All I want for birthday is Maxxie in a box."

I never watched Skins. I kept hearing about it and just never got around to seeing it.

[Tokos]

Straight gay is someone who by all estimates seems to be straight, in fact very much so meeting their gender norms, aside from the fact that it is said that they are gay.

Because being straight means something other than being attracted to the opposite sex? When did this happen?

[Buffett and Colbert]

Well, Maxxie in Skins was was pretty awesome.

In fact, yesterday, a friend of mine said "All I want for birthday is Maxxie in a box."

I never watched Skins. I kept hearing about it and just never got around to seeing it.

Rectify this. Immediately.

But don't bother with the American version, and you only really need to see the first two version of the British one. But those two seasons are amazing.

[Buffett and Colbert]

Straight gay is someone who by all estimates seems to be straight, in fact very much so meeting their gender norms, aside from the fact that it is said that they are gay.

Because being straight means something other than being attracted to the opposite sex? When did this happen?

In the west, "gay" has become more than just a sexuality, but an identity. Silly or not, that's how lots of people, homophobes and gays alike, see it. *shrug*

[Transcentient]

For starters, let us clear up one thing.

I am NOT a lesbian.

I may have previously identified as one, because it meant I had a way of validating my masculinity. Also it acknowledge my attraction to females(though I ignored the fact that I was still attracted to males)
It was also a matter of me having not accepted being transgendered.

But now that has changed, I've accepted who I am. I have taken steps to change my body in ways that the outside world will see me, as I've known myself my whole life.
So I no longer get hostile treatment, because I don't present as a masculine female. I am just seen as a Man. Who doesn't discuss his sexuality, but often flaps his wrists... So then that causes some guys to question my sexuality.

The only reason I still say I am a Trans-man, and not MAN. Is because female socialisation is a very powerful lot of experience to live through. Then for it to drastically change, and be treated in a completely different way is intense.

If you are asking where is the champion of gays in political terms, kind of like how the Blacks had Martin Luther King Jr. Then I'm sorry to say that, even if we did have someone like that. It wouldn't matter.
Blacks aren't better off in a lot of areas still. So it hasn't be fully resolved, they aren't treated equally.
Women aren't equal to men, and that is something I can comment on. Because I have lived it.

[Buffett and Colbert]

For starters, let us clear up one thing.

I am NOT a lesbian.

Sorry about that.

[Meryuma]

Straight gay is someone who by all estimates seems to be straight, in fact very much so meeting their gender norms, aside from the fact that it is said that they are gay.

Because being straight means something other than being attracted to the opposite sex? When did this happen?

Being straight doesn't mean being attracted to the opposite sex, it means being attracted exclusively to the opposite sex.

[Galenaima]

If you are asking where is the champion of gays in political terms, kind of like how the Blacks had Martin Luther King Jr. Then I'm sorry to say that, even if we did have someone like that. It wouldn't matter.
Blacks aren't better off in a lot of areas still. So it hasn't be fully resolved, they aren't treated equally.
Women aren't equal to men, and that is something I can comment on. Because I have lived it.

I agree it's not fully resolved and that discrimination exists, but one has to admit MLK made a huge difference. We need someone like him.

[Niur]

Straight gay is someone who by all estimates seems to be straight, in fact very much so meeting their gender norms, aside from the fact that it is said that they are gay.

Because being straight means something other than being attracted to the opposite sex? When did this happen?

As in not being attracted to the same sex, but only claiming to. What I mean to say is that such characters never really express any intrest in the same sex they are just said to. That is my point.

Straight gay is someone who by all estimates seems to be straight, in fact very much so meeting their gender norms, aside from the fact that it is said that they are gay.

I think you mean "straight acting."

I suppose so. I am speaking of a trope, not something that is real.

[Meryuma]

Because being straight means something other than being attracted to the opposite sex? When did this happen?

As in not being attracted to the same sex, but only claiming to. What I mean to say is that such characters never really express any intrest in the same sex they are just said to. That is my point.

I think you mean "straight acting."

I suppose so. I am speaking of a trope, not something that is real.

Specifically, this trope.

[Tokos]

okay it decided to log me out before I pressed reply so here's the shorter version

In the west, "gay" has become more than just a sexuality, but an identity. Silly or not, that's how lots of people, homophobes and gays alike, see it. *shrug*

This is a bad thing. What it means is that homosexuality is associated with bitchiness, cattiness, unreliability, cowardice, hyper-consumerism, materialism, shallowness, all that good stuff - the camp/queen stereotype, if you will. I reckon this helps homophobia and self-hating because what decent man wants to be associated with that? If the public perception of homosexuality is that it is intrinsically linked to those things and having those characteristics is just part of being gay, no wonder there's both self-hatred on the part of gays, and more dislike of gays by straights than there otherwise would be!

The whole idea of a "gay identity" is self-defeating, dangerous nonsense, and a pretty piss-poor identity at that.

[Transcentient]

Straight gay is someone who by all estimates seems to be straight, in fact very much so meeting their gender norms, aside from the fact that it is said that they are gay.

Because being straight means something other than being attracted to the opposite sex? When did this happen?

What you are failing to understand is that what I mentioned was that they make Gay characters on mainstream TV shows, less sexual. All the straight characters can fornicate all they want, they can show that imagery. Gay characters are often denied that premise, some to even the point of not even having relationships.
Granted there are gays out there who are like that, but truthfully that isn't the majority.
Gay people, lesbian people, trans people, they all have their own culture. There types of relationships are rarely presented in the media as they are in real life. They are turned into hetero-normative relationships, so that straight people can some how comprehend a relationship that doesn't have a clearly defined male role or female role.
Which in turn goes back to gender inequality.

Having struggled personally with perceived ideals of how a girl should be, and not being like that at all. Then being seen as a man, but not being 'man enough' in the 'normal' sense.

Its a loaded topic, that does need to be talked about. You may not see how it is important for young gay and lesbian kids to see themselves accurately depicted in the media, but I think it is.


Although I love Will and Grace, I always found it funny that Will was such a prude, and Jack would talk about sexin' all the time. Did you see much in the way of male on male physical interactions for a show where the main male protagonist is gay? Of course not, they wrote him to be somewhat prudish, come out of a long term relationship. Though Grace was of a similar situation, but you do see her getting frisky a lot.
So not only does it de-sexualise Will, but it makes Grace look like a bit of a slut.
You don't see Jack do shit, it gets more physical with Karen than anyone else.
To me that is not an accurate depiction of ANY of my gay friends, though I do know a few 'Jacks', I love them for there 'Devil May Care' attitude towards the straights and insecure gay men who have a negative view of them.
While the straight acting gays can bitch about the openly flamboyant gays, truth is the flamboyant gays are the ones who receive all the negative attention while the straight acting ones balls retract up inside of them.

[Coffee Cakes]

An Aspie friend of mine came out of the closet recently, and it got me to thinking, and I realized that the vast majority of the folks with Asperger's that I know and a few other friends know are gay/lesbian, and I'm wondering, is it something to do with the disorder, or the environment that they grew up in, or just random how it happens? It's like 12/16 are gay, and I'm one of the 4 that isn't, but was just curious anyhow.

[The Truth and Light]

An Aspie friend of mine came out of the closet recently, and it got me to thinking, and I realized that the vast majority of the folks with Asperger's that I know and a few other friends know are gay/lesbian, and I'm wondering, is it something to do with the disorder, or the environment that they grew up in, or just random how it happens? It's like 12/16 are gay, and I'm one of the 4 that isn't, but was just curious anyhow.

I've never noticed that pattern at all.

But I've often wondered if my disorder had anything to do with me being gay...

[Lordieth]

Those with Aspergers find it difficult (not always as severity varies) to read emotions in others and understand emotional consequences, so he/she may be more likely to 'come out' because they may not think about many of the possible consequences that are associated with it. I don't think Autism (or varients and forms thereof) directly contributes to ones sexuality. However it may look that way at face value.

[Norstal]

An Aspie friend of mine came out of the closet recently, and it got me to thinking, and I realized that the vast majority of the folks with Asperger's that I know and a few other friends know are gay/lesbian, and I'm wondering, is it something to do with the disorder, or the environment that they grew up in, or just random how it happens? It's like 12/16 are gay, and I'm one of the 4 that isn't, but was just curious anyhow.

No. Because everyone is gay.

You can't tell me you weren't slightly attracted to Fabio in his younger days. Those abs are amazing. It's just that, you wouldn't want to have sex with him.

[The Truth and Light]

An Aspie friend of mine came out of the closet recently, and it got me to thinking, and I realized that the vast majority of the folks with Asperger's that I know and a few other friends know are gay/lesbian, and I'm wondering, is it something to do with the disorder, or the environment that they grew up in, or just random how it happens? It's like 12/16 are gay, and I'm one of the 4 that isn't, but was just curious anyhow.

No. Because everyone is gay.

You can't tell me you weren't slightly attracted to Fabio in his younger days. Those abs are amazing. It's just that, you wouldn't want to have sex with him.

I think you're confusing "gay" and "having bisexual tendencies".