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PDOX Games VIII: Arise, Lord Cancer II ‘Jerked Knee’ of Salt

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Thoughts on the CK3 announcement?

The absolute mad lads
2
10%
Why??? CK2 is a classic like AOE2 update it until the end of time
4
20%
Unless they pull an I:R it can't be that bad at launch. Can it?
1
5%
Excuse me for not being hyped, it's been a while since the last positive Paradox release.
4
20%
This is gonna suck
0
No votes
What basic features are they going to monetize this time?
6
30%
Fuck
0
No votes
IN THE NAME OF DEUS! IN THE NAME OF VULT! IN THE NAME OF DEUS WE COME TO VULT!
3
15%
 
Total votes : 20

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Sefy the Great
Diplomat
 
Posts: 777
Founded: May 08, 2018
Ex-Nation

Postby Sefy the Great » Wed Mar 06, 2019 8:14 pm

The Imperial Reach wrote:
Sefy the Great wrote:but was the first Middle Eastern Hippie actually born in the middle east? he could have just arrived there in his mid-who-knows-what and got pretty popular. as noted by famous historian, Bill Wurtz:
""Hi, everything's great" said some guy, who seems to be getting very popular, and is then arrested and killed for being too popular, which only makes him more popular. You could make a religion out of this."


Well that's a pretty cynical and ridiculous theory.

that is... often what i am described as.
A 12.7 civilization, according to this index.

Motto is "All shall be well, and all matter of things shall be well." but it didn't fit.
reworking history, please wait...

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Hanafuridake
Senator
 
Posts: 3767
Founded: Sep 09, 2018
Corrupt Dictatorship

Postby Hanafuridake » Thu Mar 07, 2019 3:17 am

The Satanist mechanics are kind of cool, but seem rather bareboned. It's fun a couple of times to abduct a priest, desecrate a temple, and have weird sex on an altar with some stranger in a goat mask. But it gets boring fast since there's little more to do. The Satanic powers resulting in disabilities was interesting, but I don't see Paradox fleshing the system out.
Last edited by Hanafuridake on Thu Mar 07, 2019 3:18 am, edited 1 time in total.
Time traveling Heian princess trapped in the 21st century
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The Huskar Social Union
Post Czar
 
Posts: 40094
Founded: Apr 04, 2012
Left-wing Utopia

Postby The Huskar Social Union » Thu Mar 07, 2019 3:22 am

The Imperial Reach wrote:
The Huskar Social Union wrote:Well its hard to be someone who wasnt real.

Image


The historicity of Jesus is not up for debate, sorry to say. Feel free to question his divinity all you like but the majority of scholars agree he was a real person.

Nah man, Urban II told me himself. It was a bad joke that went too far so they rolled with it.
Scary Spooky Leftist #19879417 An Atheist Irishman from Belfast Loyal to Dragonstone and the King in the Narrow Sea
"They fight bravely. They cannot harm our ships but they continue to try"
"Whether they fight or not they know the will die anyway, so really is this bravery or simple desperation?
"
Yeh: The Red Agenda, Purging the Xenos, Not being a prick, Vidya Gaemz, Art, Science, History, Old Gregg, Blondes, Redheads, Tattooed girls, Erecting fortifications, Tanks.
Neh: The Blue Agenda, Being a prick, Xenos, Racism, National/Religious wankery, Zealots, Gatekeeping, Alt-right/SJW Snowflakes, Random lists, Dismantling Fortifications, Cabbage.

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Hanafuridake
Senator
 
Posts: 3767
Founded: Sep 09, 2018
Corrupt Dictatorship

Postby Hanafuridake » Thu Mar 07, 2019 3:26 am

The Huskar Social Union wrote:
The Imperial Reach wrote:
The historicity of Jesus is not up for debate, sorry to say. Feel free to question his divinity all you like but the majority of scholars agree he was a real person.

Nah man, Urban II told me himself. It was a bad joke that went too far so they rolled with it.


M'pope

*tips wine glass*
Time traveling Heian princess trapped in the 21st century
Buddhist Nationalist, Pan-Asianist, Neo-Confucian, Economic Collectivist

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Bralia
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 29407
Founded: Mar 07, 2010
Democratic Socialists

Postby Bralia » Thu Mar 07, 2019 4:49 am

The Huskar Social Union wrote:
The Imperial Reach wrote:
The historicity of Jesus is not up for debate, sorry to say. Feel free to question his divinity all you like but the majority of scholars agree he was a real person.

Nah man, Urban II told me himself. It was a bad joke that went too far so they rolled with it.

GOTTEM. What a bunch of fuckin' idiots!
Romantic slut. Self-deprecating egotist. Benevolent communist.
Wife and queen to King Huskar the Mannis. May his reign be long and great.
Entranced and enchanted by an embrace. In love with locked lips. I cannot lie when I meet your eyes.

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The Blaatschapen
Retired Moderator
 
Posts: 54089
Founded: Antiquity
Anarchy

Postby The Blaatschapen » Thu Mar 07, 2019 5:00 am

The Huskar Social Union wrote:
The Imperial Reach wrote:
The historicity of Jesus is not up for debate, sorry to say. Feel free to question his divinity all you like but the majority of scholars agree he was a real person.

Nah man, Urban II told me himself. It was a bad joke that went too far so they rolled with it.


Urban and Orban
Last edited by The Blaatschapen on Thu Mar 07, 2019 5:00 am, edited 1 time in total.
Forumer mod, now a rocker mocker. Thank you Ringo
Heaven is other people
Behind the invisible hand of the market hides the iron fist of the state.
Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect - Mark Twain
Silent is an anagram of listen.
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Bralia
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 29407
Founded: Mar 07, 2010
Democratic Socialists

Postby Bralia » Thu Mar 07, 2019 6:36 am

Romantic slut. Self-deprecating egotist. Benevolent communist.
Wife and queen to King Huskar the Mannis. May his reign be long and great.
Entranced and enchanted by an embrace. In love with locked lips. I cannot lie when I meet your eyes.

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Holy Tedalonia
Postmaster-General
 
Posts: 10305
Founded: Nov 14, 2016
Moralistic Democracy

Postby Holy Tedalonia » Thu Mar 07, 2019 9:03 am

The Huskar Social Union wrote:
The Imperial Reach wrote:
Are you suggesting white people can't be Jesus? That's racist.

/s

Well its hard to be someone who wasnt real.

Image

It’s funny when people don’t acknowledge the Roman Empire listing Jesus as a citizen, records and all. The whole saving everyone from their sins, is a little easier for skeptics to argue.
Name: Ted
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Favorite Senator: Ted Cruz (Ted's have to help out Ted's)
Status: Healthy and as strong as a starved ox
I M P E R I A LR E P U B L I C

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Great Confederacy of Commonwealth States
P2TM RP Mentor
 
Posts: 17541
Founded: Feb 20, 2012
Democratic Socialists

Postby Great Confederacy of Commonwealth States » Thu Mar 07, 2019 9:06 am

Holy Tedalonia wrote:
The Huskar Social Union wrote:Well its hard to be someone who wasnt real.

(Image)

It’s funny when people don’t acknowledge the Roman Empire listing Jesus as a citizen, records and all. The whole saving everyone from their sins, is a little easier for skeptics to argue.

In the same vein, there is also a historical record of emperor Constantine donating the west of his empire to pope Sylvester.

It's even a national idea of the Papal State in EUIV.
Last edited by Great Confederacy of Commonwealth States on Thu Mar 07, 2019 9:06 am, edited 1 time in total.
The name's James. James Usari. Well, my name is not actually James Usari, so don't bother actually looking it up, but it'll do for now.

Lack of a real name means compensation through a real face. My debt is settled


Part-time Kebab tycoon in Glasgow.

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Genivaria
Khan of Spam
 
Posts: 63297
Founded: Mar 29, 2011
Iron Fist Consumerists

Postby Genivaria » Thu Mar 07, 2019 9:34 am

Holy Tedalonia wrote:
The Huskar Social Union wrote:Well its hard to be someone who wasnt real.

Image

It’s funny when people don’t acknowledge the Roman Empire listing Jesus as a citizen, records and all. The whole saving everyone from their sins, is a little easier for skeptics to argue.

Why do you think that Jesus would be considered a Roman Citizen (assuming that he was born around the time the story goes) ?
I mean was his (step?)father Joseph a Roman Citizen? I'm pretty certain that Roman Citizenship was not universal norm at this point in the Empire considering that The Edict of Caracalla wasn't proclaimed until AD 212 well after Jesus's supposed death.
General Sherman did nothing wrong, fact.
Liberal Social Democrat.

Proud denouncer of the Taliban.

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Platypus Bureaucracy
Ambassador
 
Posts: 1763
Founded: Jun 06, 2018
Ex-Nation

Postby Platypus Bureaucracy » Thu Mar 07, 2019 9:42 am

Genivaria wrote:
Holy Tedalonia wrote:It’s funny when people don’t acknowledge the Roman Empire listing Jesus as a citizen, records and all. The whole saving everyone from their sins, is a little easier for skeptics to argue.

Why do you think that Jesus would be considered a Roman Citizen (assuming that he was born around the time the story goes) ?
I mean was his (step?)father Joseph a Roman Citizen? I'm pretty certain that Roman Citizenship was not universal norm at this point in the Empire considering that The Edict of Caracalla wasn't proclaimed until AD 212 well after Jesus's supposed death.

1. Jesus is God
2. God is an omnipotent being
3. An omnipotent being can do all things
4. Therefore, Jesus can do anything a citizen of Rome can do
5. Therefore, Jesus is a Roman citizen

QED
Platypus of the non-venomous, egg-laying variety
Platypus Bureaucracy wrote:I will never stop being a gay platypus.

The Huskar Social Union wrote:You glorifted ducking wanabe sea pheasant

Platapusses are not rel

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Genivaria
Khan of Spam
 
Posts: 63297
Founded: Mar 29, 2011
Iron Fist Consumerists

Postby Genivaria » Thu Mar 07, 2019 9:42 am

Platypus Bureaucracy wrote:
Genivaria wrote:Why do you think that Jesus would be considered a Roman Citizen (assuming that he was born around the time the story goes) ?
I mean was his (step?)father Joseph a Roman Citizen? I'm pretty certain that Roman Citizenship was not universal norm at this point in the Empire considering that The Edict of Caracalla wasn't proclaimed until AD 212 well after Jesus's supposed death.

1. Jesus is God
2. God is an omnipotent being
3. An omnipotent being can do all things
4. Therefore, Jesus can do anything a citizen of Rome can do
5. Therefore, Jesus is a Roman citizen

QED

Well I mean that's just silly.
General Sherman did nothing wrong, fact.
Liberal Social Democrat.

Proud denouncer of the Taliban.

User avatar
Ism
Negotiator
 
Posts: 5906
Founded: Oct 14, 2011
Scandinavian Liberal Paradise

Postby Ism » Thu Mar 07, 2019 9:49 am

There is only one God of the Paradox Thread, and he does not share power. So maybe we can take the discussion of Jesus’s historicity somewhere else? Ideally before the CDS declares a Crusade on us.

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Platypus Bureaucracy
Ambassador
 
Posts: 1763
Founded: Jun 06, 2018
Ex-Nation

Postby Platypus Bureaucracy » Thu Mar 07, 2019 9:49 am

Genivaria wrote:
Platypus Bureaucracy wrote:1. Jesus is God
2. God is an omnipotent being
3. An omnipotent being can do all things
4. Therefore, Jesus can do anything a citizen of Rome can do
5. Therefore, Jesus is a Roman citizen

QED

Well I mean that's just silly.

I. Said. QED. Goddammit.
Platypus of the non-venomous, egg-laying variety
Platypus Bureaucracy wrote:I will never stop being a gay platypus.

The Huskar Social Union wrote:You glorifted ducking wanabe sea pheasant

Platapusses are not rel

Ostroeuropa wrote:"Can we just eat SOME of the rich?"

User avatar
Holy Tedalonia
Postmaster-General
 
Posts: 10305
Founded: Nov 14, 2016
Moralistic Democracy

Postby Holy Tedalonia » Thu Mar 07, 2019 11:04 am

Genivaria wrote:
Holy Tedalonia wrote:It’s funny when people don’t acknowledge the Roman Empire listing Jesus as a citizen, records and all. The whole saving everyone from their sins, is a little easier for skeptics to argue.

Why do you think that Jesus would be considered a Roman Citizen (assuming that he was born around the time the story goes) ?
I mean was his (step?)father Joseph a Roman Citizen? I'm pretty certain that Roman Citizenship was not universal norm at this point in the Empire considering that The Edict of Caracalla wasn't proclaimed until AD 212 well after Jesus's supposed death.

I acknowledge I used the term pretty loosely. Really in Rome one thing mattered above anything else, and that was taxes. Now I usually attribute citizenship to taxes, as in this modern era most taxes are only really paid by citizens. I had used the wrong term. Really they had recordings of his residence and paying taxes.
Name: Ted
Ideology: Capitalism
Political Compass: Social Libertarian for some reason
Race: Vampire
Political Side: Right
Favorite Senator: Ted Cruz (Ted's have to help out Ted's)
Status: Healthy and as strong as a starved ox
I M P E R I A LR E P U B L I C

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Impaled Nazarene
Powerbroker
 
Posts: 8500
Founded: Aug 09, 2015
Father Knows Best State

Postby Impaled Nazarene » Thu Mar 07, 2019 11:48 am

For Whom The Bell tolls is the worst fucking event in the game. CK2 needs a checklist for supernatural/absurd events so that the utter bullshit that is an unavoidable 90%+ chance of dying does not occur.
It started in december too so when the autosave came and i reloaded the chess event was there for me. I fucking lunged at her this time and managed to survive. Right click + "Heal them".

My advice for anyone who gets that event: Lunge. a character with 100+ on all stats will fail the chess game so by all means lunge with your ruler with only one stat above 10 and hope for the best.
Non-binary Aromantic Asexual Asperger's Syndrome Anarchist
Kiaculta wrote:Oh, Kar, you silly sack of shit.
Soviet Haaregrad wrote:Bickering ist krieg.
Infected Mushroom wrote:isn't this a bit extreme?
Finland SSR wrote:"Many dictatorships are oligarchies.
Many democracies are oligarchies.
Therefore, many dictatorships are democracies."

-said no one ever. I made these words up.
Genivaria wrote:"WHY!? Why do this!? Thousands of planets and trillions of innocent lives gone! For what!?"
"It seemed like fun at the time."

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Valrifell
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 22020
Founded: Aug 18, 2013
Scandinavian Liberal Paradise

Postby Valrifell » Thu Mar 07, 2019 1:42 pm

Genivaria wrote:
Platypus Bureaucracy wrote:1. Jesus is God
2. God is an omnipotent being
3. An omnipotent being can do all things
4. Therefore, Jesus can do anything a citizen of Rome can do
5. Therefore, Jesus is a Roman citizen

QED

Well I mean that's just silly.


I mean, it's a valid argument.
I like to imagine Sisyphus happy
I did some things

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Great Confederacy of Commonwealth States
P2TM RP Mentor
 
Posts: 17541
Founded: Feb 20, 2012
Democratic Socialists

Postby Great Confederacy of Commonwealth States » Thu Mar 07, 2019 1:51 pm

Impaled Nazarene wrote:For Whom The Bell tolls is the worst fucking event in the game. CK2 needs a checklist for supernatural/absurd events so that the utter bullshit that is an unavoidable 90%+ chance of dying does not occur.
It started in december too so when the autosave came and i reloaded the chess event was there for me. I fucking lunged at her this time and managed to survive. Right click + "Heal them".

My advice for anyone who gets that event: Lunge. a character with 100+ on all stats will fail the chess game so by all means lunge with your ruler with only one stat above 10 and hope for the best.

I just execute all the strangers that come to me while I am walking in the garden. That usually cuts them off real quick.
The name's James. James Usari. Well, my name is not actually James Usari, so don't bother actually looking it up, but it'll do for now.

Lack of a real name means compensation through a real face. My debt is settled


Part-time Kebab tycoon in Glasgow.

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Ism
Negotiator
 
Posts: 5906
Founded: Oct 14, 2011
Scandinavian Liberal Paradise

Postby Ism » Thu Mar 07, 2019 1:57 pm

Impaled Nazarene wrote:For Whom The Bell tolls is the worst fucking event in the game. CK2 needs a checklist for supernatural/absurd events so that the utter bullshit that is an unavoidable 90%+ chance of dying does not occur.
It started in december too so when the autosave came and i reloaded the chess event was there for me. I fucking lunged at her this time and managed to survive. Right click + "Heal them".

My advice for anyone who gets that event: Lunge. a character with 100+ on all stats will fail the chess game so by all means lunge with your ruler with only one stat above 10 and hope for the best.


Here's what you have to do, challenge the Reaper to a limbo contest instead of chess, then sick your courtier's pet hamster on him so he'll lose. Then engage in wacky shenanigans with him and said courtier for 4 years. Works like a charm.

User avatar
Impaled Nazarene
Powerbroker
 
Posts: 8500
Founded: Aug 09, 2015
Father Knows Best State

Postby Impaled Nazarene » Thu Mar 07, 2019 2:31 pm

Great Confederacy of Commonwealth States wrote:
Impaled Nazarene wrote:For Whom The Bell tolls is the worst fucking event in the game. CK2 needs a checklist for supernatural/absurd events so that the utter bullshit that is an unavoidable 90%+ chance of dying does not occur.
It started in december too so when the autosave came and i reloaded the chess event was there for me. I fucking lunged at her this time and managed to survive. Right click + "Heal them".

My advice for anyone who gets that event: Lunge. a character with 100+ on all stats will fail the chess game so by all means lunge with your ruler with only one stat above 10 and hope for the best.

I just execute all the strangers that come to me while I am walking in the garden. That usually cuts them off real quick.

It wasn't the garden though. it was the wandering nun or whatever. And there wasn't an option to kill her, and right click kill doesn't stop the event either
Non-binary Aromantic Asexual Asperger's Syndrome Anarchist
Kiaculta wrote:Oh, Kar, you silly sack of shit.
Soviet Haaregrad wrote:Bickering ist krieg.
Infected Mushroom wrote:isn't this a bit extreme?
Finland SSR wrote:"Many dictatorships are oligarchies.
Many democracies are oligarchies.
Therefore, many dictatorships are democracies."

-said no one ever. I made these words up.
Genivaria wrote:"WHY!? Why do this!? Thousands of planets and trillions of innocent lives gone! For what!?"
"It seemed like fun at the time."

User avatar
The Imperial Reach
Ambassador
 
Posts: 1263
Founded: Jun 22, 2018
Iron Fist Consumerists

Postby The Imperial Reach » Thu Mar 07, 2019 2:36 pm

Impaled Nazarene wrote:For Whom The Bell tolls is the worst fucking event in the game. CK2 needs a checklist for supernatural/absurd events so that the utter bullshit that is an unavoidable 90%+ chance of dying does not occur.
It started in december too so when the autosave came and i reloaded the chess event was there for me. I fucking lunged at her this time and managed to survive. Right click + "Heal them".

My advice for anyone who gets that event: Lunge. a character with 100+ on all stats will fail the chess game so by all means lunge with your ruler with only one stat above 10 and hope for the best.


I've encountered this event maybe 4 times and I've never lost - not even once. Even the one time when I had no skill-related options, I still won.
Impaled Nazarene wrote:
The Imperial Reach wrote:I've encountered this event maybe 4 times and I've never lost - not even once. Even the one time when I had no skill-related options, I still won.

Stop giving me more reasons to hate you
In the process of a massive retcon, like, massive
NS stats are the Devil's lettuce
I'm too lazy to make cool for a fancy sig

My F7 Policy

User avatar
Valrifell
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 22020
Founded: Aug 18, 2013
Scandinavian Liberal Paradise

Postby Valrifell » Thu Mar 07, 2019 2:59 pm

Ism wrote:
Impaled Nazarene wrote:For Whom The Bell tolls is the worst fucking event in the game. CK2 needs a checklist for supernatural/absurd events so that the utter bullshit that is an unavoidable 90%+ chance of dying does not occur.
It started in december too so when the autosave came and i reloaded the chess event was there for me. I fucking lunged at her this time and managed to survive. Right click + "Heal them".

My advice for anyone who gets that event: Lunge. a character with 100+ on all stats will fail the chess game so by all means lunge with your ruler with only one stat above 10 and hope for the best.


Here's what you have to do, challenge the Reaper to a limbo contest instead of chess, then sick your courtier's pet hamster on him so he'll lose. Then engage in wacky shenanigans with him and said courtier for 4 years. Works like a charm.


There there, I have good taste in mid-to-late 2000s cartoons.
I like to imagine Sisyphus happy
I did some things

User avatar
Impaled Nazarene
Powerbroker
 
Posts: 8500
Founded: Aug 09, 2015
Father Knows Best State

Postby Impaled Nazarene » Thu Mar 07, 2019 3:40 pm

The Imperial Reach wrote:
Impaled Nazarene wrote:For Whom The Bell tolls is the worst fucking event in the game. CK2 needs a checklist for supernatural/absurd events so that the utter bullshit that is an unavoidable 90%+ chance of dying does not occur.
It started in december too so when the autosave came and i reloaded the chess event was there for me. I fucking lunged at her this time and managed to survive. Right click + "Heal them".

My advice for anyone who gets that event: Lunge. a character with 100+ on all stats will fail the chess game so by all means lunge with your ruler with only one stat above 10 and hope for the best.


I've encountered this event maybe 4 times and I've never lost - not even once. Even the one time when I had no skill-related options, I still won.

Stop giving me more reasons to hate you
Non-binary Aromantic Asexual Asperger's Syndrome Anarchist
Kiaculta wrote:Oh, Kar, you silly sack of shit.
Soviet Haaregrad wrote:Bickering ist krieg.
Infected Mushroom wrote:isn't this a bit extreme?
Finland SSR wrote:"Many dictatorships are oligarchies.
Many democracies are oligarchies.
Therefore, many dictatorships are democracies."

-said no one ever. I made these words up.
Genivaria wrote:"WHY!? Why do this!? Thousands of planets and trillions of innocent lives gone! For what!?"
"It seemed like fun at the time."

User avatar
The Imperial Reach
Ambassador
 
Posts: 1263
Founded: Jun 22, 2018
Iron Fist Consumerists

Postby The Imperial Reach » Thu Mar 07, 2019 3:54 pm

Impaled Nazarene wrote:
The Imperial Reach wrote:
I've encountered this event maybe 4 times and I've never lost - not even once. Even the one time when I had no skill-related options, I still won.

Stop giving me more reasons to hate you


Not my fault you don't have enough plot power to off me.

Also, welcome to my signature. :D
Last edited by The Imperial Reach on Thu Mar 07, 2019 3:57 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Impaled Nazarene wrote:
The Imperial Reach wrote:I've encountered this event maybe 4 times and I've never lost - not even once. Even the one time when I had no skill-related options, I still won.

Stop giving me more reasons to hate you
In the process of a massive retcon, like, massive
NS stats are the Devil's lettuce
I'm too lazy to make cool for a fancy sig

My F7 Policy

User avatar
Impaled Nazarene
Powerbroker
 
Posts: 8500
Founded: Aug 09, 2015
Father Knows Best State

Postby Impaled Nazarene » Thu Mar 07, 2019 4:06 pm

The Imperial Reach wrote:
Impaled Nazarene wrote:Stop giving me more reasons to hate you


Not my fault you don't have enough plot power to off me.

Also, welcome to my signature. :D

:lol:
Non-binary Aromantic Asexual Asperger's Syndrome Anarchist
Kiaculta wrote:Oh, Kar, you silly sack of shit.
Soviet Haaregrad wrote:Bickering ist krieg.
Infected Mushroom wrote:isn't this a bit extreme?
Finland SSR wrote:"Many dictatorships are oligarchies.
Many democracies are oligarchies.
Therefore, many dictatorships are democracies."

-said no one ever. I made these words up.
Genivaria wrote:"WHY!? Why do this!? Thousands of planets and trillions of innocent lives gone! For what!?"
"It seemed like fun at the time."

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