Paradox Games IV: Eat him for Éire!

[The Jonathanian States]

prevented the PLC (thereby dooming Lithuania)

No, you just saved us from the most horrid monstrosity that this world has ever seen.

That's what you think.
What I think is that Muscovy slamming through you and probably planning to do so in the future once more is quite painful.

No, you just saved us from the most horrid monstrosity that this world has ever seen.

Quiet you and accept your polish overlords

Actually, I almost got placed under them, when for a while I didn't have a heir.
Imagine having a Poland-Brandenburg *shudders*

Which game? Mods?

Speaking of Prussia....
I decided I want to do a round of Brandenburg -> Prussia in EU4, and do it in Ironman as to prevent myself from cheating.
Well, after a dozen tries which ended in a crash & burn, this rounds going quite well, I've nommed some land, become emperor, prevented the PLC (thereby dooming Lithuania) and placed a Hohenzollern on the Polish throne, but I don't think I'm able to get anywhere towards Prussia. And the piss-sacks known as the Knights Teutonic have allied with nearly 40k Muscovy, while Saxony would decline helping me against them.
I'd nom saxony and used that gained strength, but the saxon vote is a core part of my Emperorship, one that I'd rather not lose, I think.

Also, Austria is allied with Hungary and France. Minors against whom are I could enforce Imperial Liberation are allied either with England and super-sweden, or with my own ally Bohemia.
And last, Denmark got absolutely wrecked. Gotland, Bornholm,and Midjylland are Swedish, the sound islands are Hanseatic, Holstein (now only with the province of Slesvig) is independent. Byzantium also sort of is resurgent.
I did definitely not affect the latter, and I don't believe I was involved in the former.

Who are the Teutons and Muscovites rivaled with? Also, could you offer a screenshot of the region?

Can do, should be here. (Screenshots also include Muscovite and Teuton Rivals).
EDIT:
Also should include the Austrian League. /EDIT

[The Wolven League]

Totally not sitting back doing nothing while other nations take over Africa and America...

That's an entirely valid strategy. Focus on building up your strength in Europe - if you can dominate any two of the English Channel, Genoa and Venice end-nodes then you're assured a continual supply of ducats - making sure to fight land-wars against the Iberians in the process and then, once you get access to the Imperialism CB at DIP tech 23, just steal all the colonies the Iberians and Brits made for you at 0 DIP each, only 1% or 2% warscore each and 0% overextension if they weren't first owned by native tags.

A shame I'm allied to Spain...and Austria.

[The Jonathanian States]

Which game? Mods?

Speaking of Prussia....
I decided I want to do a round of Brandenburg -> Prussia in EU4, and do it in Ironman as to prevent myself from cheating.
Well, after a dozen tries which ended in a crash & burn, this rounds going quite well, I've nommed some land, become emperor, prevented the PLC (thereby dooming Lithuania) and placed a Hohenzollern on the Polish throne, but I don't think I'm able to get anywhere towards Prussia. And the piss-sacks known as the Knights Teutonic have allied with nearly 40k Muscovy, while Saxony would decline helping me against them.
I'd nom saxony and used that gained strength, but the saxon vote is a core part of my Emperorship, one that I'd rather not lose, I think.

Also, Austria is allied with Hungary and France. Minors against whom are I could enforce Imperial Liberation are allied either with England and super-sweden, or with my own ally Bohemia.
And last, Denmark got absolutely wrecked. Gotland, Bornholm,and Midjylland are Swedish, the sound islands are Hanseatic, Holstein (now only with the province of Slesvig) is independent. Byzantium also sort of is resurgent.
I did definitely not affect the latter, and I don't believe I was involved in the former.

This is EU4 with Extended Timeline

Nice.
In ET what is the primary culture of Germany after 1946? Just curious. Before that I'd assume it'd be Prussian, but after that.... Westphalian, maybe? Rhenish?

[Finland SSR]

No, you just saved us from the most horrid monstrosity that this world has ever seen.

That's what you think.
What I think is that Muscovy slamming through you and probably planning to do so in the future once more is quite painful.

Prolonged exposure to Poland makes you weak and easy target for anschluss.

Proof:
Before Poland
After Poland

I bet Lithuania will kick Muscovy to the curb now. Like it should have happened.

[Bralia]

Who are the Teutons and Muscovites rivaled with? Also, could you offer a screenshot of the region?

Can do, should be here. (Screenshots also include Muscovite and Teuton Rivals).
EDIT:
Also should include the Austrian League. /EDIT

That link led me to a very peculiar Imgur page where it told me that the pictures you uploaded have "probably been deleted or may not have existed at all" and showed off portraits of four cats wearing clothing and a giraffe wearing a top hat and monocle.

[The Danish Confederacy]

Can do, should be here. (Screenshots also include Muscovite and Teuton Rivals).
EDIT:
Also should include the Austrian League. /EDIT

That link led me to a very peculiar Imgur page where it told me that the pictures you uploaded have "probably been deleted or may not have existed at all" and showed off portraits of four cats wearing clothing and a giraffe wearing a top hat and monocle.

The way you describe it scares me, Queen Bralia.

[Finland SSR]

That link led me to a very peculiar Imgur page where it told me that the pictures you uploaded have "probably been deleted or may not have existed at all" and showed off portraits of four cats wearing clothing and a giraffe wearing a top hat and monocle.

The way you describe it scares me, Queen Bralia.

Not the strangest thing that happened recently, though.

[The Danish Confederacy]

The way you describe it scares me, Queen Bralia.

Not the strangest thing that happened recently, though.

True.
There can always be Theocratic Bears.
Of course, I didn't expect a Spanish Inquisition.

[The Jonathanian States]

Can do, should be here. (Screenshots also include Muscovite and Teuton Rivals).
EDIT:
Also should include the Austrian League. /EDIT

That link led me to a very peculiar Imgur page where it told me that the pictures you uploaded have "probably been deleted or may not have existed at all" and showed off portraits of four cats wearing clothing and a giraffe wearing a top hat and monocle.

My bad, should be available now.

That's what you think.
What I think is that Muscovy slamming through you and probably planning to do so in the future once more is quite painful.

Prolonged exposure to Poland makes you weak and easy target for anschluss.

Proof:
Before Poland
After Poland

I bet Lithuania will kick Muscovy to the curb now. Like it should have happened.

I forgot to mention that part where Novgorod too is ramming into the Jagiellon grand duchy.

Anyway, considering I currently share my dynasty and a military alliance with Poland, let's hope that the claim you place upon exposure to Poland is either wrong or avoidable by exposing yourself to Hohenzollern-Stronk particles.

[Finland SSR]

Prolonged exposure to Poland makes you weak and easy target for anschluss.

Proof:
Before Poland
After Poland

I bet Lithuania will kick Muscovy to the curb now. Like it should have happened.

I forgot to mention that part where Novgorod too is ramming into the Jagiellon grand duchy.

Anyway, considering I currently share my dynasty and a military alliance with Poland, let's hope that the claim you place upon exposure to Poland is either wrong or avoidable by exposing yourself to Hohenzollern-Stronk particles.

You're screwed...

Lithuania got exposed to Poland - lost all of it's Ruthenian territory, now sucks and I left it because of that
Sweden attacked Poland - defeated in Great Northern War by Russia half a century after contamination, now isolationist to avoid contacting Poland ever again
Austria(-Hungary) took pieces of Poland - collapsed 120 years later
Prussia (later German Empire) took pieces of Poland - lost all colonial possessions and had to pay reparations
Napoleon's France took Poland from Russia and Prussia - dude died on a remote island two decades later, country became Europe's butt monkey a century later
Nazi Germany took over Poland - crushed 6 years later
Soviet Union made puppet state out of Poland - Poland begins the collapse of the Eastern Pact
Golden Horde invades Poland - crushed by Lithuania at Blue Waters and later by Muscovy at Kulikovo a century later
Henry Valois rules Poland - brings disease to France, religious wars
Hungarians get Jagiellon rulers - conquered by Kebab
Ottomans fight Poland - collapse soon after

yah...

[Bralia]

That link led me to a very peculiar Imgur page where it told me that the pictures you uploaded have "probably been deleted or may not have existed at all" and showed off portraits of four cats wearing clothing and a giraffe wearing a top hat and monocle.

My bad, should be available now.

Damn, I was hoping to find a way for you to eliminate all roads between Muscovy and you and it doesn't look like an easy one to break. I suspect if you find a way to get into an easy war with Lithuania, you can break his military access with the Teutons and that should give you the opening you need to strike at the Teutons and remain safe from Muscovite interference.

Also, cool Byzantium.

[The Jonathanian States]

My bad, should be available now.

Damn, I was hoping to find a way for you to eliminate all roads between Muscovy and you and it doesn't look like an easy one to break.

There was a short timeframe during which Muscovy and the Livonians were at war with each other through Novgorod, meaning that only one of them could have joined, but Muscovy is higher alphabetically and this being Ironman I did not want to risk them being the one that joins.

I suspect if you find a way to get into an easy war with Lithuania,

Setting aside the fact that I don't know how I'd do that, they're allied to Poland, last I checked.

you can break his military access with the Teutons

Allies in a war always have access, so I don't see how that matters.

and that should give you the opening you need to strike at the Teutons and remain safe from Muscovite interference.

That's sort of what I'd like to be, yes.

Also, cool Byzantium.

I know, right? I didn't do anything around there at all.

[Whiteshore]

If there is a China expansion for CK2, could "A Pagan in Pagan" be a possible achievement? And could a China DLC be called "All under Heaven"?

[Bralia]

I suspect if you find a way to get into an easy war with Lithuania,

Setting aside the fact that I don't know how I'd do that, they're allied to Poland, last I checked.

you can break his military access with the Teutons

Allies in a war always have access, so I don't see how that matters.

They're also allied to Sweden. . If you can get Poland in on that, all the better, the historical friendship between them and Lithuania should break. You don't even need to finish the war against Sweden so long as you achieve your goals in Lithuania.

They have access with each other yes, but what matters are the countries in between you, the Teutons and Muscovy. The key part of this is noting that rivals will never accept access through their rivals' lands. Muscovy cannot march through Novgorod. Lithuania is the weak link, since neither the Teutons or Muscovy view them as a rival. However, I do note that the Livonian Order has access through Novgorod and I forget if sub-partners in a war affect access or not . . .

[The Jonathanian States]

Setting aside the fact that I don't know how I'd do that, they're allied to Poland, last I checked.

Allies in a war always have access, so I don't see how that matters.

They're also allied to Sweden. . If you can get Poland in on that, all the better, the historical friendship between them and Lithuania should break. You don't even need to finish the war against Sweden so long as you achieve your goals in Lithuania.

They have access with each other yes, but what matters are the countries in between you, the Teutons and Muscovy. The key part of this is noting that rivals will never accept access through their rivals' lands. Muscovy cannot march through Novgorod. Lithuania is the weak link, since neither the Teutons or Muscovy view them as a rival. However, I do note that the Livonian Order has access through Novgorod and I forget if sub-partners in a war affect access or not . . .

Right, I forgot the Swedish link. Sweden is quite strong, but with Poland and if I wait for Saxony it should be possible.

So let's assume I split the Polish-Lithuanian friendship, and also give Sweden-Lithuania a minor defeat....
I don't think that the Livonians having access should grant it to the Muscovites. Now, would Lithuania seeing Muscovy as a rival but not vice-versa ensure that they don't give them access?

EDIT: Wait a sec..... If the answer to that last question is positive then I actually can declare on the TO right now.... Lithuania considers Muscovy a rival, so does Novgorod. /EDIT

[Ifreann]

Can do, should be here. (Screenshots also include Muscovite and Teuton Rivals).
EDIT:
Also should include the Austrian League. /EDIT

That link led me to a very peculiar Imgur page where it told me that the pictures you uploaded have "probably been deleted or may not have existed at all" and showed off portraits of four cats wearing clothing and a giraffe wearing a top hat and monocle.

Those are obviously the rebels. Muscovite cats and a Teuton giraffe.

[Bralia]

They're also allied to Sweden. . If you can get Poland in on that, all the better, the historical friendship between them and Lithuania should break. You don't even need to finish the war against Sweden so long as you achieve your goals in Lithuania.

They have access with each other yes, but what matters are the countries in between you, the Teutons and Muscovy. The key part of this is noting that rivals will never accept access through their rivals' lands. Muscovy cannot march through Novgorod. Lithuania is the weak link, since neither the Teutons or Muscovy view them as a rival. However, I do note that the Livonian Order has access through Novgorod and I forget if sub-partners in a war affect access or not . . .

Right, I forgot the Swedish link. Sweden is quite strong, but with Poland and if I wait for Saxony it should be possible.

So let's assume I split the Polish-Lithuanian friendship, and also give Sweden-Lithuania a minor defeat....
I don't think that the Livonians having access should grant it to the Muscovites. Now, would Lithuania seeing Muscovy as a rival but not vice-versa ensure that they don't give them access?

EDIT: Wait a sec..... If the answer to that last question is positive then I actually can declare on the TO right now.... Lithuania considers Muscovy a rival, so does Novgorod. /EDIT

God damn it, my knowledge is screwy here. I went into EUIV to make sure of some things and junior partners do give access through third parties. France (me), allied to Spain, Spain has access with Burgundy, which means I have access through Burgundy. New tactics required.

. . . what about the Livonian Order? Do they have any other allies? If not . . . it's a little bonkers to go this out of the way to find a way into war with the Teutons, but consider placing an embargo on them in the hopes that they'll embargo you in return. Revoke your embargo if they do that and hope they don't retract their's as well. Justify a trade conflict on them (need to have merchant in a node where you have at least 10% trade power AND the Livonian Order has 20% trade power) and BAM, you got yourself a war with Livonia and the Teutons.

I will go to the ends of the Earth to The Jonathanian States form Prussia!

[Bralia]

The Horse Lords have not yet finished stampeding. RAZE EVERYTHING!

[The Huskar Social Union]

Well no shit. Why else would someone play EU4?

To be good leader?

*wipes away tear* You should join the comedy circuit.

But it's true! Right now it's 1573 in my campaign and I am being good leader and all, spreading Ottoman to pierce right through the heart of Holy Roman Empire! Against Austria, of course. And Italian states.

He does not understand...

[Andrellian Isles]

Razing your own provinces? Nomads be crazy. The Tenghri stuff sounds really interesting though.

And the next dev diary is about the estates, now that I'm looking forward to. Keeping the peasants, burghers, priests and nobility happy and occupied fighting eachother.

[Altito Asmoro]

To be good leader?

But it's true! Right now it's 1573 in my campaign and I am being good leader and all, spreading Ottoman to pierce right through the heart of Holy Roman Empire! Against Austria, of course. And Italian states.

He does not understand...

I can into relevance! Ottoman stronk! Remove byzantium, 1453 best year of life!

But I'm being good leader there.

[Finland SSR]

He does not understand...

I can into relevance! Ottoman stronk! Remove byzantium, 1453 best year of life!

But I'm being good leader there.

Polandball speak is not funny.

You are not funny.

You should join the Serious Unfunny Circus of Boringville.

[The Huskar Social Union]

He does not understand...

I can into relevance! Ottoman stronk! Remove byzantium, 1453 best year of life!

But I'm being good leader there.

He continues to not understand...

[Altito Asmoro]

I can into relevance! Ottoman stronk! Remove byzantium, 1453 best year of life!

But I'm being good leader there.

Polandball speak is not funny.

You are not funny.

You should join the Serious Unfunny Circus of Boringville.

I am unfunny? Really?

And in other news I may continue the campaign tomorrow. Currently I'm thinking of turning Ottoman into democratic government, you know, republic.

[Altito Asmoro]

I can into relevance! Ottoman stronk! Remove byzantium, 1453 best year of life!

But I'm being good leader there.

He continues to not understand...

What part, King Huskari? But I followed your ideal, king!