Paradox Games IV: Eat him for Éire!

[Renoa]

So for my next DH exhibition, should I go for communist Spain, Allies-aligned China, or a Megarussia run? Or maybe a buffed WWI France run to see how fast I can destroy Germany? Mexican Empire?

False, Fascist Liberia. Theocratic too, if that's somehow possible.

[Benomia 3]

>come within spitting distance of annexing the USA
>Germany makes peace with Britain, forced into a white peace with the entire Entente

Every time.

[Herargon]

Mind me, I really think PI is just making a large April Fools joke regarding that bonsai thing.

That said, if I'm wrong... well, guess I shall have to undergo a CK2 punishment then.

[U n i t y]

I thought that was Taco land.

There too.

Well, the state of Chihuahua is not Taco nor Wacko land because the CSA managed to take it from Mexico despite getting 3/4's of their army stack wiped.
AI Smrt.

I still don't get how having three times the technology of an opponent and still losing is possible. It should be like fighting an unciv.

[Roma Byzantina]

Mind me, I really think PI is just making a large April Fools joke regarding that bonsai thing.

That said, if I'm wrong... well, guess I shall have to undergo a CK2 punishment then.

Considering they had a Dev. Diary about phones...

There too.

Well, the state of Chihuahua is not Taco nor Wacko land because the CSA managed to take it from Mexico despite getting 3/4's of their army stack wiped.
AI Smrt.

I still don't get how having three times the technology of an opponent and still losing is possible. It should be like fighting an unciv.

That's Mexico for ya. Always bringing up my hopes and then crushing them under its own stupidity...

[Ifreann]

Sexy Iberia.

[Transoxthraxia]

Sexy Iberia.

Castile has gone the way of Granada.

[Renoa]

Welp, Portugal has taken advantage of me yet again. It's just like them to make my navy take a surprise gang bang from Morocco and Tlemcen by declaring war at the worst possible time, then swoop in at the last second to take all the credit. This action delayed us getting our armies to Morocco for months, which allowed the Moors to combine their armies into a temporarily undefeatable stack. A stack that Portugal then landed their own armies on. They promptly got wiped, of course.

[Transoxthraxia]

Welp, Portugal has taken advantage of me yet again. It's just like them to make my navy take a surprise gang bang from Morocco and Tlemcen by declaring war at the worst possible time, then swoop in at the last second to take all the credit. This action delayed us getting our armies to Morocco for months, which allowed the Moors to combine their armies into a temporarily undefeatable stack. A stack that Portugal then landed their own armies on. They promptly got wiped, of course.

Surprise bang eh? ;^)

[Herargon]

Mind me, I really think PI is just making a large April Fools joke regarding that bonsai thing.

That said, if I'm wrong... well, guess I shall have to undergo a CK2 punishment then.

Considering they had a Dev. Diary about phones...

Well, the state of Chihuahua is not Taco nor Wacko land because the CSA managed to take it from Mexico despite getting 3/4's of their army stack wiped.
AI Smrt.

I still don't get how having three times the technology of an opponent and still losing is possible. It should be like fighting an unciv.

That's Mexico for ya. Always bringing up my hopes and then crushing them under its own stupidity...

Wait, where? Do you have the link? That sounds hilarious to me.

[Roma Byzantina]

Sexy Iberia.

Absolutely disgusting.

Welp, Portugal has taken advantage of me yet again. It's just like them to make my navy take a surprise gang bang from Morocco and Tlemcen by declaring war at the worst possible time, then swoop in at the last second to take all the credit. This action delayed us getting our armies to Morocco for months, which allowed the Moors to combine their armies into a temporarily undefeatable stack. A stack that Portugal then landed their own armies on. They promptly got wiped, of course.

That's what happens when you ally Poortugal.

[Renoa]

Welp, Portugal has taken advantage of me yet again. It's just like them to make my navy take a surprise gang bang from Morocco and Tlemcen by declaring war at the worst possible time, then swoop in at the last second to take all the credit. This action delayed us getting our armies to Morocco for months, which allowed the Moors to combine their armies into a temporarily undefeatable stack. A stack that Portugal then landed their own armies on. They promptly got wiped, of course.

Surprise bang eh? ;^)

Yes, they forced their big strong carracks into my vulnerable barques. I said no but they didn't stop.

[Roma Byzantina]

Surprise bang eh? ;^)

Yes, they forced their big strong carracks into my vulnerable barques. I said no but they didn't stop.

Ooh, kinky

[Ifreann]

Re- Remove Kebab?

[The Wolven League]

Paradox . . . are you doing what I think you're going to do?

Bonsai trees will be playable confirmed.

[Roma Byzantina]

Re- Remove Kebab?

Kebab got real big...

[Shaggai]

Paradox . . . are you doing what I think you're going to do?

The patch will be a massive optimization, so that it actually runs at a decent speed in the late game. Their next dev diary will be solely about the optimization, with a bunch of references to Far East stuff. The expansion will be a purely RP-based expansion, but for the first few dev diaries they'll focus on features that would not go awry in a Far East expansion.

[Ifreann]

Re- Remove Kebab?

Kebab got real big...

They're also westernised and caught up in tech.

[Roma Byzantina]

Kebab got real big...

They're also westernised and caught up in tech.

As Tia would say... "Mother of me..."

[The Wolven League]

Re- Remove Kebab?

Kebab got real big...

They rarely don't.

[Benomia 3]

>be me
>be soviet union
>be 1948
>trying to export world communism
>give a shit ton of guns to mr mao
>literally almost bankrupt myself funding mr mao
>he loses the war, roc annexes all of china
>start arming ho chi minh
>literally already bankrupt, do it anyway
>enter an actual alliance, risking ww3 just to make sure he wins the war
>he loses, south vietnam annexes the north
>try to placate yugoslavia to help bail out my dying industries
>yugoslavia wants a free trade agreement with bulgaria or something
>allow it
>that fuckheat tito fucking ANNEXES ALL OF BULGARIA AND THEN LEAVES THE WARSAW PACT
>literally destroyed my economy
>check the pop maps
>millions of workers escaping to east germany and then to the USA
>blockade Berlin to try and stop the hordes
>USA just starts massive airlift, threatens WW3 if I intervene
>fucking_sigh.jpg
>decide to stir up shit in korea just to show the world i can still into commie
>north invades the south, seems to be going well
>the UN fucking declares war on the dprk without even letting me veto
>south korea annexes all of north korea within a year
>tfw no slave korean state gf
>start the third five-year plan
>it just makes things worse
>Syria wants an alliance all of a sudden
>agree
>they IMMEDIATELY DECLARE WAR ON ISRAEL
>fucking bring me into it
>Israel was in France's sphere, they join
>fucking WW3 starts because syria couldn't keep it in their pants
>USA randomly nukes moscow twenty minutes after the declaration of war


Every time.

[Ifreann]

>be me
>be soviet union
>be 1948
>trying to export world communism

I'm no expert, but I think this is where things started going wrong.

[Transoxthraxia]

>be me
>be soviet union
>be 1948 1917
>trying to export world communism

I'm no expert, but I think this is where things started going wrong.

ftfy

[Roma Byzantina]

I'm planning on picking up ToG for CK2 this wednesday/thursday and I want recommendations on who to play at the 867 start. I'd prefer Norse and Christian characters, but I'm fine with Tengri, Romuva, African, etc.

[Renoa]

I'm planning on picking up ToG for CK2 this wednesday/thursday and I want recommendations on who to play at the 867 start. I'd prefer Norse and Christian characters, but I'm fine with Tengri, Romuva, African, etc.

ProEnthusiasttip: Pagan religions other than Norse, Tengri, and possibly Slavic suck.

That said, I recommend Haesteinn, the chief of Nantes. He's a viking surrounded by weak Bretons, and if you want an easy Norse-Norman or Norse-Norman-English route, he's your guy.