Writing Discussion II

[Nordengrund]

What genre would classify a story that is pretty much realistic fiction and could happen in our world, except for one supernatural scene?

Oh, and it's not horror.

[USS Monitor]

What genre would classify a story that is pretty much realistic fiction and could happen in our world, except for one supernatural scene?

Oh, and it's not horror.

Urban fantasy.

[Conserative Morality]

What genre would classify a story that is pretty much realistic fiction and could happen in our world, except for one supernatural scene?

Oh, and it's not horror.

Magic realism?

[Respubliko de Libereco]

What genre would classify a story that is pretty much realistic fiction and could happen in our world, except for one supernatural scene?

Oh, and it's not horror.

Maybe magic realism, maybe just "a story that doesn't try to belong to any particular genre".

I kinda don't get the idea that, by default, works that aren't explicitly fantasy should strive to be "realistic". I see movies being criticized for being "unrealistic" all the time, often along with the claim that the author "doesn't understand how physics works" or something along those lines. Heck, I used to do that myself. However, the more I think about it the less sense it makes.

[USS Monitor]

What genre would classify a story that is pretty much realistic fiction and could happen in our world, except for one supernatural scene?

Oh, and it's not horror.

Maybe magic realism, maybe just "a story that doesn't try to belong to any particular genre".

I kinda don't get the idea that, by default, works that aren't explicitly fantasy should strive to be "realistic". I see movies being criticized for being "unrealistic" all the time, often along with the claim that the author "doesn't understand how physics works" or something along those lines. Heck, I used to do that myself. However, the more I think about it the less sense it makes.

If the lack of realism doesn't seem intentional, it can be really distracting and make it harder to stay immersed in the story. Some comedies (e.g. "Home Alone" movies) are deliberately unrealistic without being outright fantasy, and people are OK with that. But that works because it's consciously unrealistic.

[Nordengrund]

Well, in that particular scene, the protagonist talks to a ghost, so I'd imagine it would be whatever genre Christmas Carol is in.

[The first Galactic Republic]

Maybe magic realism, maybe just "a story that doesn't try to belong to any particular genre".

I kinda don't get the idea that, by default, works that aren't explicitly fantasy should strive to be "realistic". I see movies being criticized for being "unrealistic" all the time, often along with the claim that the author "doesn't understand how physics works" or something along those lines. Heck, I used to do that myself. However, the more I think about it the less sense it makes.

If the lack of realism doesn't seem intentional, it can be really distracting and make it harder to stay immersed in the story. Some comedies (e.g. "Home Alone" movies) are deliberately unrealistic without being outright fantasy, and people are OK with that. But that works because it's consciously unrealistic.

Any thoughts on the story on the previous page?

Also a writing question.

How do I write a character writing? Seems simple but I'm going for something in particular. The opening scene of Justice League New Frontier if you've ever seen it has an exposition fairy narrating some of the events behind the setting, but turns out it was him writing it all in a book. Then he immediately shoots himself, the camera not showing it but the aftermath of it on the book he was writing.

It's a powerful scene and I wanted to know how conveying something similar in writing would work. How to show that transition from seemingly generic narration to the fact that the character was actually writing themselves.

[Anywhere Else But Here]

If the lack of realism doesn't seem intentional, it can be really distracting and make it harder to stay immersed in the story. Some comedies (e.g. "Home Alone" movies) are deliberately unrealistic without being outright fantasy, and people are OK with that. But that works because it's consciously unrealistic.

Any thoughts on the story on the previous page?

Also a writing question.

How do I write a character writing? Seems simple but I'm going for something in particular. The opening scene of Justice League New Frontier if you've ever seen it has an exposition fairy narrating some of the events behind the setting, but turns out it was him writing it all in a book. Then he immediately shoots himself, the camera not showing it but the aftermath of it on the book he was writing.

It's a powerful scene and I wanted to know how conveying something similar in writing would work. How to show that transition from seemingly generic narration to the fact that the character was actually writing themselves.

You could put what they were writing in italics, then have the first non-italic sentence communicate that the character had been writing that ("John put down his pen and cast a dissatisfied eye over his work", "Sam paused, the nib of his pen pressing into the page where he'd put the full stop. He scratched his chin. What had happened next?", "Dave stopped typing and hit save, wondering all the while why his parents had cursed him with such a generic first name" etc)

[USS Monitor]

Well, in that particular scene, the protagonist talks to a ghost, so I'd imagine it would be whatever genre Christmas Carol is in.

It doesn't really matter what genre it is, TBH. If you want to have a ghost in your story, have a ghost.

[Respubliko de Libereco]

Maybe magic realism, maybe just "a story that doesn't try to belong to any particular genre".

I kinda don't get the idea that, by default, works that aren't explicitly fantasy should strive to be "realistic". I see movies being criticized for being "unrealistic" all the time, often along with the claim that the author "doesn't understand how physics works" or something along those lines. Heck, I used to do that myself. However, the more I think about it the less sense it makes.

If the lack of realism doesn't seem intentional, it can be really distracting and make it harder to stay immersed in the story. Some comedies (e.g. "Home Alone" movies) are deliberately unrealistic without being outright fantasy, and people are OK with that. But that works because it's consciously unrealistic.

I don't think it's that straightforward, though, because Furious 7 is very clearly deliberately over-the-top, and yet I've seen many people level the same sorts of "not understanding how physics works" accusations at it.

Any thoughts on the story on the previous page?

Here's what I thought.

In general, your writing is very straightforward and matter-of-fact, and generally lacking in the sort of atmospheric touches that really make the story worth experiencing. It feels like you're telling me about a scene in a movie that you saw yesterday, but failing to convey the actual essence of the scene. For example, consider this bit:

The hologram flickered away, in its place a giant walker like robot approached. Weapons flared up from its body.

I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this. Is it an "oh shit, we might actually die this time" moment? More of a tense standoff? Just business as usual, to set up an action scene? As is, all I know is that there's a "giant walker like robot" with "weapons".

Remember, the goal of a story is not to tell the reader about some things that happened. The goal is to write something that's worth reading.

[USS Monitor]

If the lack of realism doesn't seem intentional, it can be really distracting and make it harder to stay immersed in the story. Some comedies (e.g. "Home Alone" movies) are deliberately unrealistic without being outright fantasy, and people are OK with that. But that works because it's consciously unrealistic.

I don't think it's that straightforward, though, because Furious 7 is very clearly deliberately over-the-top, and yet I've seen many people level the same sorts of "not understanding how physics works" accusations at it.

I haven't seen it, so I can't comment on specifics, but evidently, it just didn't work for some people.

[The first Galactic Republic]

If the lack of realism doesn't seem intentional, it can be really distracting and make it harder to stay immersed in the story. Some comedies (e.g. "Home Alone" movies) are deliberately unrealistic without being outright fantasy, and people are OK with that. But that works because it's consciously unrealistic.

I don't think it's that straightforward, though, because Furious 7 is very clearly deliberately over-the-top, and yet I've seen many people level the same sorts of "not understanding how physics works" accusations at it.

Any thoughts on the story on the previous page?

Here's what I thought.

In general, your writing is very straightforward and matter-of-fact, and generally lacking in the sort of atmospheric touches that really make the story worth experiencing. It feels like you're telling me about a scene in a movie that you saw yesterday, but failing to convey the actual essence of the scene. For example, consider this bit:

The hologram flickered away, in its place a giant walker like robot approached. Weapons flared up from its body.

I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this. Is it an "oh shit, we might actually die this time" moment? More of a tense standoff? Just business as usual, to set up an action scene? As is, all I know is that there's a "giant walker like robot" with "weapons".

Remember, the goal of a story is not to tell the reader about some things that happened. The goal is to write something that's worth reading.

Hey thanks for reading.

As the first chapter in a longer story I'm aware of what you're talking about. As a fanfic I'm focusing mainly on just setting up the story in the beginning. The characters aren't really mine yet, they are still defined by how they are in the source material. I haven't had the time to develop them myself yet. I'll take what you've said into consideration though and focus on making sure the beginning isn't just a rush of action set pieces.

[Respubliko de Libereco]

I don't think it's that straightforward, though, because Furious 7 is very clearly deliberately over-the-top, and yet I've seen many people level the same sorts of "not understanding how physics works" accusations at it.

I haven't seen it, so I can't comment on specifics, but evidently, it just didn't work for some people.

So, to give you some context, this happens. Also, they skydive in cars at one point, and just generally embrace big, ridiculous stunts throughout the entire movie.

EDIT: I mean, I can understand people not liking that style of movie, but the language that people use often carries heavy connotations of factual wrongness, as if the movie has failed to be realistic, as opposed to not having tried in the first place.

[Trotskylvania]

Finally got back on the wagon today. Wrote about 800 words in one of my own settings, and like 1500 in fanfic. So I'm still trash, but at least I'm back to writing.

[USS Monitor]

Finally got back on the wagon today. Wrote about 800 words in one of my own settings, and like 1500 in fanfic. So I'm still trash, but at least I'm back to writing.

Nice.

I have a story I am working on open in another window. I haven't added all that much tonight, but did work on it a little.

[Equestria and Griffon]

Be sure to submit your stories to the Writing contest.Also,we will now start casting judges.

[Nordengrund]

Has anyone here started a story and forgot where you were going with it?

I found an unfinished draft that was supposed to be the Tortoise and the Hare with a twist, but I forgot what that twist was.

[USS Monitor]

Has anyone here started a story and forgot where you were going with it?

I found an unfinished draft that was supposed to be the Tortoise and the Hare with a twist, but I forgot what that twist was.

I've had stories that I came back to after a long hiatus and didn't remember everything. Sometimes it's a good opportunity to look at the story with fresh eyes and take it in a different direction from what you originally planned.

[Zeinbrad]

I think I may start writing stories in the style of the character, so if they well educated, stoic and don't curse, the chapter is told in a how they would speak, if they are uneducated, loud and curse worse than a sailor, it be in the style of how they speak.

[USS Monitor]

I think I may start writing stories in the style of the character, so if they well educated, stoic and don't curse, the chapter is told in a how they would speak, if they are uneducated, loud and curse worse than a sailor, it be in the style of how they speak.

Might work. Give it a try and see if you like the result.

[Schiltzberg]

I wrote a folk song about our society. What do you guys think?

The Storm It's a-Brewing

The sky has turned black,
And the rivers are burning.
The saints are in their graves,
And their bodies are turning.
Politicians shout corruption,
And their hearts are all frozen.
Their tongues are all twisted,
And their hands are all broken.

The churches are all empty
And burned to the ground.
The priests are all butchered
And sold by the pound.
The judges are wasted
And spending their time
Spending their money
And wasting our time.

The Sun is blotted out,
And the clouds begin to form.
The winds have all stopped,
And the birds sense the storm.
The forests are on fire,
And the oceans are stewing.
The waves, they are a-crashing,
And the storm, it's a-brewing.

The executioner washed his hands
Of a gentleman's blood.
A man called out for Jesus
When his soul was caked in mud.
His pockets were loaded,
And his clothes lined with gold,
But his coins, they all tarnished
After his spirit was sold.

The people are judging
And dividing themselves.
The thought of equality,
Just the dust on their shelves.
The Earth's started quaking,
And the rocks are pushed back.
The dead regain life,
And the Sun has gone black.

The Sun is blotted out,
And the clouds begin to form.
The winds have all stopped,
And the birds sense the storm.
The forests are on fire,
And the oceans are stewing.
The waves, they are a-crashing,
And the storm, it's a-brewing.

All the species are dying,
And all the policemen are shot.
Now our national flag
Is tied up in a knot.
The air is polluted,
And the ground is all hard.
All of our bodies
Are covered with lard.

All the children are dying,
And their mothers don't care.
A man and a woman
No longer make a pair.
We don't know our own genders.
We don't know our own names.
We don't know our religion.
We don't know from where we came.

The Sun is blotted out,
And the clouds begin to form.
The winds have all stopped,
And the birds sense the storm.
The forests are on fire,
And the oceans are stewing.
The waves, they are a-crashing,
And the storm, it's a-brewing.

God said to Noah
The storms wouldn't come again,
But even God never knew
The sinfulness of these men.
Sometimes I don't know
What this world is doing,
But the floods, they're a-coming,
And the storm, it's a-brewing.

[Respubliko de Libereco]

I wrote a folk song about our society. What do you guys think?

The Storm It's a-Brewing

The sky has turned black,
And the rivers are burning.
The saints are in their graves,
And their bodies are turning.
Politicians shout corruption,
And their hearts are all frozen.
Their tongues are all twisted,
And their hands are all broken.

The churches are all empty
And burned to the ground.
The priests are all butchered
And sold by the pound.
The judges are wasted
And spending their time
Spending their money
And wasting our time.

The Sun is blotted out,
And the clouds begin to form.
The winds have all stopped,
And the birds sense the storm.
The forests are on fire,
And the oceans are stewing.
The waves, they are a-crashing,
And the storm, it's a-brewing.

The executioner washed his hands
Of a gentleman's blood.
A man called out for Jesus
When his soul was caked in mud.
His pockets were loaded,
And his clothes lined with gold,
But his coins, they all tarnished
After his spirit was sold.

The people are judging
And dividing themselves.
The thought of equality,
Just the dust on their shelves.
The Earth's started quaking,
And the rocks are pushed back.
The dead regain life,
And the Sun has gone black.

The Sun is blotted out,
And the clouds begin to form.
The winds have all stopped,
And the birds sense the storm.
The forests are on fire,
And the oceans are stewing.
The waves, they are a-crashing,
And the storm, it's a-brewing.

All the species are dying,
And all the policemen are shot.
Now our national flag
Is tied up in a knot.
The air is polluted,
And the ground is all hard.
All of our bodies
Are covered with lard.

All the children are dying,
And their mothers don't care.
A man and a woman
No longer make a pair.
We don't know our own genders.
We don't know our own names.
We don't know our religion.
We don't know from where we came.

The Sun is blotted out,
And the clouds begin to form.
The winds have all stopped,
And the birds sense the storm.
The forests are on fire,
And the oceans are stewing.
The waves, they are a-crashing,
And the storm, it's a-brewing.

God said to Noah
The storms wouldn't come again,
But even God never knew
The sinfulness of these men.
Sometimes I don't know
What this world is doing,
But the floods, they're a-coming,
And the storm, it's a-brewing.

I can see where you're aiming with the rhythm, but it's not quite regular enough in my opinion. I'm not saying it needs to be in strict amphibrachic tetrameter or anything like that, but at least try to stick to fix the lines with more than two stressed syllables.

I think that combining every two lines into one might make it a bit easier to see where things are going wonky.

[Schiltzberg]

I wrote a folk song about our society. What do you guys think?

The Storm It's a-Brewing

The sky has turned black,
And the rivers are burning.
The saints are in their graves,
And their bodies are turning.
Politicians shout corruption,
And their hearts are all frozen.
Their tongues are all twisted,
And their hands are all broken.

The churches are all empty
And burned to the ground.
The priests are all butchered
And sold by the pound.
The judges are wasted
And spending their time
Spending their money
And wasting our time.

The Sun is blotted out,
And the clouds begin to form.
The winds have all stopped,
And the birds sense the storm.
The forests are on fire,
And the oceans are stewing.
The waves, they are a-crashing,
And the storm, it's a-brewing.

The executioner washed his hands
Of a gentleman's blood.
A man called out for Jesus
When his soul was caked in mud.
His pockets were loaded,
And his clothes lined with gold,
But his coins, they all tarnished
After his spirit was sold.

The people are judging
And dividing themselves.
The thought of equality,
Just the dust on their shelves.
The Earth's started quaking,
And the rocks are pushed back.
The dead regain life,
And the Sun has gone black.

The Sun is blotted out,
And the clouds begin to form.
The winds have all stopped,
And the birds sense the storm.
The forests are on fire,
And the oceans are stewing.
The waves, they are a-crashing,
And the storm, it's a-brewing.

All the species are dying,
And all the policemen are shot.
Now our national flag
Is tied up in a knot.
The air is polluted,
And the ground is all hard.
All of our bodies
Are covered with lard.

All the children are dying,
And their mothers don't care.
A man and a woman
No longer make a pair.
We don't know our own genders.
We don't know our own names.
We don't know our religion.
We don't know from where we came.

The Sun is blotted out,
And the clouds begin to form.
The winds have all stopped,
And the birds sense the storm.
The forests are on fire,
And the oceans are stewing.
The waves, they are a-crashing,
And the storm, it's a-brewing.

God said to Noah
The storms wouldn't come again,
But even God never knew
The sinfulness of these men.
Sometimes I don't know
What this world is doing,
But the floods, they're a-coming,
And the storm, it's a-brewing.

I can see where you're aiming with the rhythm, but it's not quite regular enough in my opinion. I'm not saying it needs to be in strict amphibrachic tetrameter or anything like that, but at least try to stick to fix the lines with more than two stressed syllables.

I think that combining every two lines into one might make it a bit easier to see where things are going wonky.

I do not think that rhythm is a problem, because it works when I sing it. I think that maybe you just think that because you can't hear it being sung. I was more wondering what you thought of the lyrics.

[The Rich Port]

I recalled a dream I had as I woke up listening to this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b-kvdw1CGOU

I dreamt that the Disney World park, itself, was a breathing, intelligent creature. I had a vision of it breathing and moving, sorta moving and slithering into and out of the ground, kinda shifting around, like it was trying to get comfortable.

And oh, what a happy coincidence: I was planning on going to Disney World tomorrow.

I'll be sure to tell you guys if I run across some horrible Disney abomination waiting in my Contemporary Resort hotel room with tea and a desire for conversation about the gaps between the universes.

Was thinking about somehow writing that into some Escape from Tomorrow knock-off.

Also, I like posting my ideas on here to see if I inspire anybody that doesn't have ADD to write them, since I'm sort of incapable of writing them myself.

[Respubliko de Libereco]

I can see where you're aiming with the rhythm, but it's not quite regular enough in my opinion. I'm not saying it needs to be in strict amphibrachic tetrameter or anything like that, but at least try to stick to fix the lines with more than two stressed syllables.

I think that combining every two lines into one might make it a bit easier to see where things are going wonky.

I do not think that rhythm is a problem, because it works when I sing it. I think that maybe you just think that because you can't hear it being sung. I was more wondering what you thought of the lyrics.

If the work is truly well written, I should be able to imagine the rhythm that it would be sung with fairly easily. In this case, while I can see the rhythm that it tends towards (i.e. roughly amphibrachic tetrameter, if you take every two lines as one line), I can't imagine it being sung smoothly, without either rushing or botching words in a conspicuous way, or else having a very inconsistent rhythm.

Of course, there are plenty of songs without a very consistent rhythm, but you say this is a folk song, and when I think of "folk music" (and especially the sort of folk music with "a-brewing" in the title), I think of something with a very regular and prominent metre.

This definitely has to do with the lyrics. How could it not, seeing as all you've shared is the lyrics?