NationStates Issues **SPOILER ALERT**

[Trotterdam]

So, a few recent issues have tricky validities.

As a reminder, #833 is a followup to #813 option 3.

#837 is available only to nations in the World Assembly. Like #132, it has an option that kicks you out, although this time at least it seems to have a real narrative, rather than existing just to trick players.

#838 is part of the Dogman saga, probably for nations that legalized vigilantism, and was written by Caracasus.

[Jutsa]

Ah... yes, those will be tricky to get.

[Midsealand]

How come crime rises and tourism falls when you approve same-sex marriage in Issue 001?

[Jutsa]

Please refer to this thread when asking questions about stats.
(I've made mistakes fully well knowing where they belong, so don't freight too much at all.)

While I'm here, I might as well answer with an "I don't know", but it probably has to relate to several knock-on effects,
plus the concept that "crime" is more-or-less compared to criminal actions in the eyes of the World Assembly rather than actual law-breaking rates,
and tourism would go down due to that increasing.

[Ransium]

How come crime rises and tourism falls when you approve same-sex marriage in Issue 001?

1) This is not the proper thread for this, please use the unusual issue effects threads (watch Luna move this and make me look like a crazy person).
2) Both these movements were very small if you look at the overall scale of crime and tourism.
2) You are a very new nation, the secondary effects of issues (ie a stat moving and affecting another stat) tend to appear stronger at first and will diminish in time.

[Jutsa]

Good news! I found 838.

#838: The Bark Knight Rises [Caracasus; ed: Helaw]

The Issue
The beloved comic book series Dogman is set to mark its eightieth anniversary this year. A coalition of comic book aficionados, young and old, have gathered outside your office to decide how to best celebrate this achievement.

The Debate
1. “You know what I loved?” reminisces ageing general Cassidy Shakespeare. “The war arc! Ha ha! Great fun to see Dogman giving those blighters from Blackacre what-for! That’s the kind of patriotic hero our country should be celebrating. Make Dogman a symbol of patriotism and Jutsaish supremacy, an icon of our strength! Our enemies will learn to truly fear our bark and our bite.”

2. “You know, Dogman stands for a lot more than just beating up bad guys,” counters Hamlet Barrow, a well-known environmentalist and peace activist. “He shows children how important it is to take care of nature, and how kindness is the greatest superpower of all. Dogman-themed recycling bins and a positive ad campaign could be a great hit and really send out the right message.”

3. “Dogman is all very well, and a good role model for boys, but what about the girls?” asks renowned newspaper columnist Marjorie Grant. “Why don’t we use this to celebrate some of the famous women in the comics? After all, Dogman’s long-term love interest donned the mantle of Weasel Lady for four whole issues whilst Dogman was in hospital after his battle with Irritant Flower.”

4. “Hah! That run of comics was so full of inconsistencies it would be funny if it weren’t so tragic,” sneers comic book enthusiast and self-proclaimed expert on Dogman, Silvio Mozart. “Quite apart from anything else, The Bamboozler’s machine was destroyed in issue 242, yet somehow he manages to bring it back to mortally wound Dogman in a later issue. And a normal human that is somehow able to don the sacred Weasel Lady mantle? Worst storyline ever! Let’s at least make this celebration somewhat balanced. I have a long list here of the various inconsistencies in the series for your speech...”

5. “You know these comics are bull, right?” says Jamie Logan, former vigilante and one of six men who has fought crime on the streets under the mantle of Dogman in the past century. “Maybe a quarter of it happened, and not like this. In the real world, people die, and no dude in a leotard can stop that. Adults shouldn’t read superhero comics. Force them to grow up, and drag them back to face reality.” He stares moodily at the cloudy sky, waiting for the Dogsignal.

Also, unless there's a 6th option - which I somewhat doubt - then this is all of the options.

Edit: Let me know if any of the names are random, though I somewhat suspect they're all fixed.

[Jutsa]

In addition to adding 838 to the list, I rearranged the first few posts so that the list of macros, names(incomplete), and industries is in the very first post (with the information about the topic),
while the list now begins in the second post.

[Bears Armed]

Actually the second forename isn't fixed. Willow would be a great choice if it were though.

Oh, just coincidence that I got 'Willow' there two times running then... Okay.

I've just received this issue again, with this nation again, and 'Willow' was the forename for the speaker in the second option again. Are you sure that it isn't fixed?

[The Candy Of Bottles]

Wag The Dog- 837

The Issue

Auditors from the World Assembly have decided to pay a visit to assess how much @@NAME@@ should pay to fulfill its annual donation to the organization. The problem? The law regulating the donations operates as if it isn’t voluntary, and the number they’re quoting is causing your accountants to faint.

The Debate

1 “I know the language of the resolution says ‘donation’, but it’s a mandatory donation. Here, look at the third definition from the top,” asserts your Chief Legal Advisor, shoving a dusty, leatherbound book under your nose. “And there’s all the legislative history from the debates… what isn’t censored out, at least. We have a legal and moral obligation to obey international law. Besides, the last thing we want is to be noncompliant with the World Assembly. The repercussions would be unthinkable.”

Accept

2 “How could a ‘donation’ possibly be mandatory?” snorts your Minister of Finance. “Pseudo-legal claptrap, if you ask me. Now, we can’t break the law, obviously, but look at how many zeros there are in that number. A lot, that’s how many. The law clearly needs a little tweak. Let’s have our World Assembly ambassador write up a quick repeal and replacement. The international community couldn’t possibly be opposed to some common-sense reform, right?”

Accept

3 “I think I have a solution for you, @@LEADER@@,” whispers Quincy Baldwin, President and CEO of the Agency for Creative Solutions. “These ‘rules’ about donations are really more like guidelines anyway. Look, if you change a few numbers in the books, they won’t have anything to take. Here, we can just erase this zero… carry the seven… and now you’re in the red! As long as no one looks too closely at the books, you probably won’t suffer terrifying reprisals. In fact, we’ll even do this one for free, if you make us your exclusive government accounting service.” He smiles, showing far too many teeth.

Accept

4 “Who gives an empty sack about ‘international’ law?” exclaims radical radio pundit Virginia Goethe, who just shouldered her way into your office. “For too long the World Assembly and its bureaucratic gnomes have leeched off our glorious nation’s hard work! They regulate our businesses into the ground with their child labor and environmental protection laws, involve themselves in our affairs with their feel-good anti-slavery legislation, and then they want us to empty the treasury into their bottomless bar tabs! Resign now and get rid of ‘em all, I say!” She eyes up a nearby security guard’s weapon. “By any means necessary.”

Accept

Dismiss This Issue

Issue by The Confederate Dominion of Separatist Peoples

Edited by Gnejs

Left possible @@RANDOMNAME@@s in options 3 and 4 alone for comparison reasons, no gaps in source.

[Jutsa]

Woohoo! Congratulations, Separatist Peoples!

Updating now.

Edit: Ah, there's definitely at least a fifth and sixth option here - both for state-run economies.

[Fauxia]

Ayyy!

[Arceus Domains]

Ok ok, we are getting closer to 850!

839 - “Partisanship Too Far?” Wrongly Asks Opposition

The Issue

After a recent incident where a lifeguard refused to save a drowning swimmer because she thought he looked like he belonged to another political party, talking heads on cable TV have seized upon the moment to ask if the current partisan political tensions in @@NAME@@ have gotten out of control.

The Debate

1. “Clearly the root of the problem is the media capitalizing on existing tensions for monetary gain,” argues frequent cable TV pundit Darya Galavan, unfazed by the chagrined frown of the show’s host. “We need to put rules in place so the media cannot be so blatantly partisan and negative in its reporting of political news stories...”

2. “That’s precisely the sort of dangerous idiocy your party would advocate!” shouts host Ivan McKay, cutting off her attempts to talk. “People just need a little incentive to break through their bubbles and see the other side as people too. Give a small tax break to people based on how many of their MyFace friends have different political views, and I’m sure all this partisan hullabaloo will be gone overnight.”

3. As the program quickly cuts to an ad-break, a soothing, over-cheerful voice caresses your ears. “Looking for love, friendship, and happiness?” On screen, a cascade of fizzy Eckie-Ecola is poured into a glass, ice cubes clinking. “Pop the can, and feel all the love you can! Nothing brings you closer together than Eckie-Ecola.”

4. “I don’t see what the problem is,” notes your aide, turning off your TV. “In fact, I say we enhance partisan identification by designating what colors people can wear based on their political affiliation. Then you’ll immediately know who is working to better the country, and who only has morally bankrupt and wrongheaded ideas.”

Issue by Ransium

Edited by Caracasus

(No gaps in source code, I think that all the names are random, let's compare if possible).

[Luna Amore]

Oh, just coincidence that I got 'Willow' there two times running then... Okay.

I've just received this issue again, with this nation again, and 'Willow' was the forename for the speaker in the second option again. Are you sure that it isn't fixed?

Yuppers, random.

[Drasnia]

I've just received this issue again, with this nation again, and 'Willow' was the forename for the speaker in the second option again. Are you sure that it isn't fixed?

Yuppers, random.

Praise RNGesus.

[Celino and Barnes]

#841 Burn Noticed

The Issue

Due to a recent spate of acid attacks in Celino and Barnes City, many Celino and Barnesians are calling upon you to face this growing problem.

The Debate

1.“You need to be exceptionally cruel to carry out these attacks,” observes Dr. Miles Evans, in a cold tone of voice. “A little human empathy would prevent these horrific premeditated crimes, but the monsters who perpetrate these crimes are inherently selfish, and can only understand their own pain, not that of others. So the solution is simple - if someone is convicted of carrying out an acid attack, then before you send them to prison, apply acid to their faces. I think if these evil folk know that they’ll be the ones feeling the burn, they’ll think twice before acting.”

2.“Take care of those already affected by acid attacks,” demands Jane Maldonado, an attack victim with a determined look in her eyes. “Our faces have been marred for the rest of our lives. I’ve had to face countless operations, and I’m still recovering from the trauma. Some victims have been blinded, some find it hard to get a job because people find it hard to look at them. The government should make sure to fund the surgeries and therapies that an acid victim needs. Economic and social discrimination against victims should be banned. And attackers, they should get life sentences in prison, since that’s what us victims experience.”

3.“The solution is as plain as the nose on my face,” proclaims Barbara Siskel, a plumber speaking to a crowd of acid attack victims. “The chemicals used in these attacks are very easy to access and obtain. Drain cleaner is the most commonly used fluid in these crimes, and it can be bought cheaply at the nearest store. Outlaw the possession of corrosive substances for everyone except for licensed tradesmen. If people need their pipes unclogged, they must call a professional to handle the situation.”

4.“Them harlots deserved it!” writes wanted criminal Moff Bergman, in a childlike scrawl on bloodstained paper that arrived by old-fashioned post this morning. “Yes, I doused my daughter in acid, and I don’t feel any remorse! Woman have gotten too uppity, refusing the marriages we arrange for them, or cavorting in public with their naked arms and wanton smiles. Acid cleanses a woman of these wrongs, and reminds her daily of the consequences her unclean actions have wrought.”

Issue by The Jettatura of The Marsupial Illuminati

Edited by Candlewhisper Archive

[Teh War Machine]

#840 Abstinence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

The Issue

Parents at West Teh War Machine City High School were furious to discover that teachers belonging to a small evangelical sect ignored national guidelines about comprehensive sex education, instead teaching an abstinence-only programme.

The Debate

1.“How is Little Angela supposed to survive a world of adult pressures without knowing all the facts?” fumes parent Don Johannsen, his straggly hair hanging limply around his shoulders. “It’s deplorable that so-called educators could leave her so unprepared for life. Order that all schools teach the standardised and comprehensive curriculum as written, and fire all teachers that refuse!”

2.“The walking mop is correct,” attests Miss Quimby, one of the teachers in question, writing a red ‘F’ on your hand. “And we tell the youngsters exactly how it is. We show the crippling effects of syphilis; tell them every sexually-active person could have it. We tell them condoms cause rashes; that boys who kiss you will leave. We tell them that some women who have an abortion will never get pregnant again. And we say: only those who join our Purity Club, marrying their one pure and predestined partner can avoid those horrors. For facts, from a correct viewpoint, you must fund our abstinence-only curriculum nationwide.”

3.“Immoral purveyors of the perverse!” booms Fly-fornication Yoder, a bushy-bearded member of an obscure order, who is trailed by his black-clad wife and twelve thematically-named children. “The youth hear filthy words – endometrium, oestrogen, epidermis – and soon they are side-hugging, holding hands, and watching prime-time satire on the Comedy Network. The One Above is clear: remain pure, knowing nought of the foulness by which infants are begotten until your wedding night. Ban all discussion of the mechanics of reproduction, for Teh War Machine’s moral health.”

4.“We could make everyone happy,” coos prematurely-grey former-teacher Pete Wolowitz, his bug-eyes seeming even larger through a thick pair of round-rimmed spectacles. “I admit, I used to be one of those hip ‘withhold nothing’ teachers. Then I had kids. The idea of my itty-bitty Victoria hearing naughty words, in the name of ‘education’? Not on my watch, bucko. Big Government should stop legislating every tiny detail of our kids’ school day, and allow schools to teach any sex education curriculum they like: from no-holds-barred to nothing at all. Then parents will be free to choose the school that best suits their needs.”

Accept

Issue by The Theocracy of The Free Joy State

Edited by The Free Joy State

[Jutsa]

Golly gee willikers, have the editors been busy ._.

Updating the list now; thank you both.

[Trotterdam]

#840 Abstinence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

Heh, this title matches the effect line for #358 1.

[Jutsa]

Update:

Added both of your issues! However, I have to ask:

Fly-fornication Yoder

Is this a random name? I'd certainly be surprised.

I also added anchors to each post that comprises of the list of issues and their anchors. Yes, an archive for the archive.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

#840 Abstinence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

Heh, this title matches the effect line for #358 1.

Damn, that's annoying. I do hate repeated jokes. Will discuss with team and see if the effect line wants changing.

[Trotterdam]

Added both of your issues! However, I have to ask:

Fly-fornication Yoder

Is this a random name? I'd certainly be surprised.

Well, it's not from any of the nation's custom fields.

[Trotterdam]

Having gotten the issue on a puppet, I can now confirm that "Fly-fornication Yoder" is, in fact, completely fixed.

The other names are random.

[Jutsa]

Just wanted to remind folks that I'm still looking to see if there's a state-run economic version of #837: Wag The Dog.

[Fauxia]

837 now?

[Jutsa]

It's been reported; I just want to see if there are variant options. 3 and 4 seem pretty... privatized-industry-centric?