NationStates Issues **SPOILER ALERT**

[Jutsa]

Teehee, thanks. Never know - could have been the court numbers were the other way around.

[Trotterdam]

Oh yeah, and in addition to that list, we need #911, #916, #917, and #919. Good luck finding #911.
(if it's even ready yet, idk)

Don't forget #914 option 7. I've double-checked and I'm quite certain there is one.

[Jutsa]

updated the list at the bottom of the previous page.

Edit: well, posted anyway, might as well share it again:

190.2, 488.3, 717.3, 760.3, 788.2, 788.5, possibly 837.5/6, 848.3, possibly 850.4, 851.4, possibly 858.5, 875.3, possibly 880.4, 884.4, possibly 896.6, 910.4, 911, 916, 917, 918.7, and 919;
plus validities for 411.1/2, 523.3, 610.4, and all of 896.

[Fauxia]

Tsk, tsk, tsk, Ransium.

Heh, I'd fire him from the team, but what with his shiny moderator badge and his seniority in Forest I'm not sure who outranks who any more.

We should probably have a knifefight, or something.

Eh, pretty sure the moderators chose option 788.2

[Trotterdam]

Eh, pretty sure the moderators chose option 788.2

Which one is that? It's not on the list.

It's been extended to 6 options (or maybe it always was), which Jutsa neglected to update.

[Jutsa]

*Whistles* What are you talking about? It's on the list of things to find... *hides editing pen*

(sorry I missed that... eheh. )

[Trotterdam]

3. “WhoTube has the right idea banning hate speech,” pipes-up Barack Adams, an activist for ‘Jutsae Against Hatred’.

The popular radio host, Alexandra Lukin, Marche Noire immigrant and vocal critic of the country she fled, was found sprawled across the sundial of XXXX Park at noon, dead as a South @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ Dodo. Advisors have gathered in the shadowy recesses of your office, wondering what to tell the South Pacific’s waiting press.

Say... might you have missed some macros there?

[Jutsa]

Tbf the latter one wasn't me, but yeah, thanks again Trotterdam.

[Jutsa]

I just realized - these 900-teens are like the early 800s all over again.

[Trotterdam]

I just realized - these 900-teens are like the early 800s all over again.

How so?

[Jutsa]

We've got a bunch of issues that we haven't found yet, at least one of which is going to be fairly difficult.

[Trotterdam]

From what I can tell, #911 is this, #917 is this, and I can't find a drafting thread for #919 but it seems to have something to do with childrens' toys.

Even the ones that I was able to find have been heavily modified in transit, including the revival of an option on #917 that the author spoke against including.

[Jutsa]

I love how many of these I actually recognize from drafting.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

From what I can tell, #911 is this, #917 is this, and I can't find a drafting thread for #919 but it seems to have something to do with childrens' toys.

Even the ones that I was able to find have been heavily modified in transit, including the revival of an option on #917 that the author spoke against including.

917 went through two complete different iterations before reaching you guys. The interim was based on the seemingly oddly early release of British multiple rapist John Worboys, which caused a lot of scandal here. However, thanks to the team I was finally able to nail down the core dilemma ("what does a life sentence mean?") while losing all the stuff that didn't work, and adding some stuff that made the issue actually something humorous.

[Trotterdam]

Looks like I got #917 and #919 mixed up. (And Candlewhisper Archive just sneakily went along with my delusions rather than correcting me.)

#919 The Meaning of Life

The Issue

Ten years ago ice cream salesman Barry Santiago - better known as "the Murder Clown" - was sentenced to life in prison. He was convicted of having more than three dozen grisly circus-themed murders under his elasticated polka-dot belt, plus various acts of mayhem and the telling of criminally bad jokes. A week ago, his parole board decided that he was no longer a threat to society and could be released under strict conditions and with close surveillance. Yesterday, the press caught wind of this and launched a campaign protesting his release.

The Debate

1. "Life means life!" angrily proclaims Clark Wayne, a usually mild-mannered tabloid journalist. "Is there really any reason to allow this insane joker anything other than four concrete walls, plain food and stale water? You should remove any possibility of parole whenever a life sentence is assigned. Dangerous animals belong in cages!"

2. "It may have been a decade for him, but it feels like yesterday for those he hurt," whispers Francine Castle, whose husband and son were former victims of the criminal. "We can't feel safe until he is in the grave. You say he's a dangerous animal? Then put him down. Monsters like this belong in the electric chair, not in a cell."

3. "C'mon now, puddin', this is our job, making parole judgements! We know what we're doin'!" argues parole board leader Dr. Quinn, both hands clutching a mug of camomile tea defensively. "Ten years has gotta be plenty of time for Mistah Clown to be changin' his ways. You know people can change, right? Good guys can become bad, and bad ones can become good. Look, you can't undo the past; if we can get him rehabilitated and doin' some good for society, won't that be a good thing?"!

Issue by Candlewhisper Archive
Edited by Candlewhisper Archive

A lot of those names look nonrandom. Addendum: I found a copy on NSindex which confirms that the only random name is that of the killer himself. (It might be @@RANDOMMALENAME@@, unsure if females are possible.)

Weirdly, the only effect line that made it through from the original draft is the one that's based on a narrative that's no longer present.

I find myself wondering if it makes sense to be a "former victim" of a murderer. It's not like you can come back to life...

[Jutsa]

Updated. Very curious as to whether the first speaker is male or doesn't matter...

[Trotterdam]

#637 Little Pizza History

Prominent restaurant chain Pop's Eatery recently announced plans to tear down the historic Cash Mansion in @@CAPITAL@@ and replace it with a fast food restaurant. Disgusted by the impending destruction of a national landmark, two dozen history students have surrounded the site, delaying the building's demolition and causing just enough ruckus to get your attention.

The Debate

1. "We cannot accept this blatant destruction of our culture!" cries a surprisingly agile social studies teacher, leaping into your office window after scaling the side of the capitol building. "It's common knowledge that Douglas Cash was the leader of the revolutionaries that founded this country... or was he the inventor of that spinning doohickey? Either way, the Cash residence is a priceless piece of our national history. The government should protect the site as a national landmark... and put more funding towards historical education while you're at it."

2. "Out with the old and in with the new!" opines @@RANDOMNAME@@, manager of Pop's Eatery, while handing out free samples to everyone in sight. "These fried saltballs were invented right here in @@NAME@@ by one of my top chefs, and at least in my opinion, that's some @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ culture worth celebrating. If you assign a few more cops to keep away the overeducated hooligans from my stores, then I could have a free hand to open Pop's Eateries on every corner of @@NAME@@."

3. "Why not have your cake and eat it too?" asks your underachieving Culture Minister, @@RANDOMNAME@@, while tucking into a tray of vol-au-vents taken from a recent gallery opening. "By which I mean have food AND culture at the same time. We should preserve these historical sites and allow - no, actually, make that REQUIRE - that they all have restaurants built within them. Imagine it: a roast on the spit in an old castle, tea and scones in noble palaces, all-you-can-eat-buffets in museums commemorating the Great @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ Famine. Now that's what I call culture!"

Issue by Oppressia FTDOF
Edited by Lenyo

Changing "owner" to "manager" is probably the only change, but it's easier to post the whole thing than to compare it.

[Jutsa]

Eh, probably. Also, the names are fixed in the list - can you confirm or deny this to be correct in the issue?

[Trotterdam]

Also, the names are fixed in the list

Those are definitely not the names I got.

[Trotterdam]

#921 It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad @@NAME@@

The Issue

Eccentric millionaire @@RANDOMNAME@@ caused an uproar after @@HE/SHE@@ said that @@HE/SHE@@ hid a treasure chest filled with one million bits somewhere in @@CAPITAL@@. Widespread trespassing and two deaths have caused great debate over whether the hunt should go on.

The Debate

1. "Excuse me, coming through!" booms @@NAME@@'s overworked Chief of Police, @@RANDOMNAME@@, having roughly detained a teenager who was outside your door. "Look at this chaos! Can you imagine the logistical nightmare if this treasure hunt is allowed to continue? Thousands of people stampeding and tearing up @@CAPITAL@@ and rioting if they don't win? If you care about the safety and security of your citizens, you should put an end to these shenanigans and heavily restrict treasure hunting so it complies with public safety standards."

2. "Hold on!" yells your Minister of Tourism as she rummages through your desk. "You can't put an end to this hunt. The people clearly want it to continue. Everyone is happy, buying supplies, and generating profits for local businesses. In fact, this should be an annual tradition! That will really bring in the tourists!" She storms out of your office after realizing the chest isn't there.

3. As you finally relax in your chair, you are greeted by your Minister of the Environment @@RANDOMNAME@@, who happened to be hiding behind your office plant. "I have a great compromise! Imagine if you had these treasure hunts in our great national parks! Picture the rush of people exploring and appreciating the great wilderness that @@NAME@@ has to offer, under supervision of course, all for the price of a ticket."

4. Your phone rings several times before you answer it. "Hello @@LEADER@@," says a distorted voice of indeterminate origin. "I can't help but notice that there are some key government critics who are also searching for the treasure. Wouldn't it be convenient if they got lost following some faulty clues?" You immediately hear a click and a dial tone.

Issue by Westfacto
Edited by Nation of Quebec

I am unsure if the pronouns in option 2 are random, despite not being attached to any name. Worth noting is that the randomname I got for the previous option was also female (Luna). (In fact, the draft thread suggests that the police officer may be an explicit @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@ and the environmental minister is a @@RANDOMMALENAME@@, though I don't see why. These do match the genders I got, though, so it's a possibility. My millionaire was also male.)

[Jutsa]

Updated #637 and added #921. I feel like I've seen Westfacto before, but idk...

Oh, also, this issue reminds me a bit of that maxemon woah issue.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

Looks like I got #917 and #919 mixed up. (And Candlewhisper Archive just sneakily went along with my delusions rather than correcting me.)[box]#919 The Meaning of Life

The lesson here is never assume malice when incompetence is a possible explanation. I basically neither checked nor noticed you'd got the wrong number. Generally I assume that your attention to fine detail is superior to mine, and assume your reports are probably accurate.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

So, 926 issues in the game at the moment. Just sayin'.

No pressure.

[Jutsa]

great... only 8 issues to hunt for. How hard could that be?

[Jutsa]

Correction: Make that 7. Got #916 off of NSIndex.

Somehow I'm not too surprised Zwanzug edited it...