I can offer some assorted minor thoughts to help clean up the edges. Nothing here is critical – just stylistic stuff that would probably be edited in anyway, to help get it into tip-top shape before submission:
- For the description, starting a sentence with "however" is sometimes considered déclassé. It is not wrong, but it'll put grammarians in a fighting mood, so for non-dialectal speech like the description I personally would suggest rearranging the words to put it later in the sentence.
- Option 1's first line repeats the use of "chili dogs." This could simply end with "dry-heaving at the thought." to avoid the awkward repeat. Also, given the intensity of the opinion being given, I would suggest grabbing your thesaurus and finding a more interesting word than "says" for the minister.
- Option 2 – is there are a particular reference being made with the name Bowie Peanut? I don't recognize it. If there is, great – keep it. If not, consider randomizing. Same as above with "says." I do like the idea of the speaker being from the UF, but it does seem a little strange that they are so gung-ho about promoting your nation instead of their own. It might work better if it's a homegrown hero situation, talking up their (your) nation. That would also make it a little less weird for socialist nations, some of whom will have an unpleasant military history with the UF.
- In the final option, I would suggest replacing "bulldogs" with the national animal.
This is looking pretty good.
