TITLE: Having A Dead Good Time
VALIDITY: No drug laws, poor health services, commercial drug production legalized
DESCRIPTION:
A total absence of drug laws in @@NAME@@ has paved the way for the industrial production and distribution of increasingly potent synthetic substances into several inner city areas, resulting in overdose rates far exceeding the capacity of health services.
OPTION 1
"Newly-synthesized substances, particularly synthetic opioids, can be up to fifty-times stronger than heroin," warns drug awareness advocate @@RANDOMNAME@@, dressed more like a junior sales assistant than a qualified expert, "which means individuals in vulnerable circumstances can and will throw themselves to the abyss whenever they want, especially if they're already an addict. It's clear we're not intent on criminalising the current market, but if we ban the commercial synthesis of these stronger substances before manufacturers find a way to sell them dangerously cheap, countless @@DEMONYMPLURAL@@ will be saved."
OUTCOME:
commercial production of heroin is at an all-time high
OPTION 2
"That just won't cut it!" barks your Health Secretary @@RANDOMNAME@@, pacing the room more agitated by the second. "If these seedy manufacturers want to keep producing and selling what should essentially be classed as poison, they should be prepared to deal with a whole new class of regulations. I'm talking constant safety investigations, product testing, tracking... the lot! And if a single person dies on their product, I say we have grounds to relocate as much of their profits as we please directly into the @@DEMONYM@@ health services. Sounds like a win-win to me."
OUTCOME:
the health services are high on drug money
OPTION 3
"Are you scared or something?" mocks particularly-intimidating industrial drugs manufacturer @@RANDOMNAME@@, vials of @@HIS@@ latest syntheses displayed on your desk. "My stuff sells well because it feels good. Why deny upstanding citizens the right to that? Our specialized laboratories have yielded substances stronger and more addictive than ever before... we'll have customers paying triple by next week! It's too late to go back now, @@LEADER@@, I say we move forward into this profitable oblivion."
OUTCOME:
the backstreets of @@NAME@@ are referred to as 'zombie zones'
TITLE: Having A Dead Good Time
VALIDITY: No drug laws, poor health services, commercial drug production legalized
DESCRIPTION:
A total absence of drug laws in @@NAME@@ has paved the way for the industrial production and distribution of cheap and increasingly potent synthetic substances into the streets of several inner city areas, resulting in rates of overdose far exceeding the capacity of health services.
OPTION 1
"Newly-synthesized substances, particularly synthetic opioids, can be up to fifty-times stronger than heroin," warns drug awareness advocate @@RANDOMNAME@@, dressed more like a junior sales assistant than a qualified expert, "which means individuals in vulnerable circumstances can throw themselves to the abyss at the drop of a hat. It's clear we're not intent on criminalising the current market, but the potency of these new substances makes me question why their production is even allowed at all. We don't have to ban any existing substances, just ban the synthesis of stronger ones and put more well-needed @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ into the health services."
OUTCOME:
drug addictions are state controlled
OPTION 2
"That just won't cut it!" barks your Health Secretary @@RANDOMNAME@@, pacing around the room more agitated by the second. "If these seedy manufacturers want to keep producing and selling what should essentially be classed as poison, they should be prepared to deal with a whole new class of regulations. I'm talking constant safety inspections, product tracking... the lot! And if even one person dies at their hand, I'm sure our strictest maximum security prisons would be a great place for these careless head honchos to spend the rest of their lives."
OUTCOME:
drugs manufacturers are quickly moving production back into makeshift, off-the-grid labs
OPTION 3
"Are you scared or something?" mocks particularly-intimidating industrial drugs manufacturer @@RANDOMNAME@@, vials of @@HIS@@ latest syntheses displayed on your desk. "My stuff sells well because it feels good. Why deny upstanding citizens the right to that? Our specialized laboratories have yielded substances stronger and more addictive than ever before... we'll have customers paying triple by next week! It's too late to go back now, @@LEADER@@, I say we move forward into this profitable oblivion."
OUTCOME:
the backstreets of @@NAME@@ are referred to as 'zombie zones'
TITLE: Having A Dead Good Time
VALIDITY: No drug laws, poor health services, commercial drug production legalized
DESCRIPTION:
A total absence of drug laws in @@NAME@@ has paved the way for the industrial production and distribution of cheap and increasingly potent synthetic substances into the streets of several inner city areas, resulting in rates of overdose far exceeding the capacity of health services.
OPTION 1
"Newly-synthesized substances, particularly opioids, can be up to fifty-times stronger than heroin," warns drug awareness advocate @@RANDOMNAME@@, dressed more like a junior sales assistant than a qualified expert, "which means individuals in vulnerable circumstances can too easily choose an abyss of dependence. It's clear we're not intent on criminalising all drugs, but the potency of these new substances makes me question why their production is even allowed at all. Instead of banning any existing substances, why not just ban the synthesis of stronger ones?"
OUTCOME:
large scale drug manufacturers have moved their operations back to alleyways and abandoned warehouses
OPTION 2
"Are you scared or something?" mocks particularly-intimidating industrial drugs manufacturer @@RANDOMNAME@@, vials of @@HIS@@ latest syntheses displayed on your desk. "My stuff sells well because it feels good. Why deny upstanding citizens the right to that? Our experiments have yielded substances stronger and more addictive than ever before... we'll have customers paying triple by next week! It's too late to go back now, @@LEADER@@... I say we move forward into this profitable oblivion."
OUTCOME:
the streets of @@NAME@@ are awash with zombified dragon chasers
OPTION 3
"How can you justify putting the lives of our people at risk like this?" probes your Health Secretary @@RANDOMNAME@@, pacing around the room more agitated by the second. "Is it not obvious to you that these substances need to be regulated, even just a little tighter? It's completely inhumane to allow them in such potent quantities anywhere in @@NAME@@, and you're only making it worse even entertaining these exploitative manufacturers! The government should be in charge of all drug production and distribute these substances based solely on avoiding overdoses."
OUTCOME:
drug addictions are state controlled
TITLE: Having A Dead Good Time
VALIDITY: No drug laws, poor health services, commercial drug production legalized
DESCRIPTION:
A total absence of drug laws in @@NAME@@ has paved the way for the industrial production and distribution of cheap and increasingly potent synthetic substances into the streets of several inner city areas, resulting in rates of overdose far exceeding the capacity of health services.
OPTION 1
"Newly-synthesized substances, particularly opioids, can be up to fifty-times stronger than heroin," warns drug awareness advocate @@RANDOMNAME@@, dressed more like a junior sales assistant than a qualified expert, "which means individuals in vulnerable circumstances can too easily choose an abyss of dependence. It's clear we're not intent on criminalising all drugs, but the potency of these new substances makes me question why their production is even allowed at all. Instead of banning any existing substances, why not just ban the synthesis of stronger ones?"
OUTCOME:
large scale drug manufacturers have moved their operations back to alleyways and abandoned warehouses
OPTION 2
"Are you scared or something?" mocks particularly-intimidating industrial drugs manufacturer @@RANDOMNAME@@, vials of @@HIS@@ latest syntheses displayed on your desk. "My stuff sells well because it feels good. Why deny upstanding citizens the right to that? In fact, our trials have shown tremendous progress in the development of even stronger products, set to be released onto the streets this week! It's too late to go back now, @@LEADER@@... I say we move forward into this profitable oblivion."
OUTCOME:
the streets of @@NAME@@ are awash with zombified dragon chasers
OPTION 3
"How can you justify putting the lives of our people at risk like this?" probes your Health Secretary @@RANDOMNAME@@, staring at the drugs manufacturer with terrifying malice. "Is it not obvious to you that these substances need to be regulated, even just a little tighter? It's completely inhumane to allow them in such potent quantities anywhere in @@NAME@@, and you're only making it worse even entertaining these exploitative manufacturers! The government should be in charge of all drug production and distribute these substances based solely on avoiding overdoses."
OUTCOME:
drug addictions are state controlled
TITLE: Having A Dead Good Time
VALIDITY: No drug laws, poor health services, commercial drug production legalized
DESCRIPTION:
A total absence of drug laws in @@NAME@@ has paved the way for the industrial production and distribution of cheap and increasingly potent synthetic substances into the streets of several inner city areas, pushing the limits of what many @@DEMONYMPLURAL@@ consider worth legalising.
OPTION 1
"These newly-synthesized substances, particularly opioids, can be up to fifty-times stronger than heroin," warns drug awareness advocate @@RANDOMNAME@@, dressed more like a junior sales assistant than a qualified speaker, "which means vulnerable individuals in difficult situations can take the affordable descent into an abyss of addiction and dependence. It's clear we're not intent on criminalising all drugs, but the potency of these newer, synthetic substances are leading to overdose rates far above the capacity of our health services. Instead of banning existing substances, why not just ban the synthesis of these new ones?"
OUTCOME:
drug addicts regularly revolt demanding stronger substances
OPTION 2
"Are you scared or something?" mocks particularly-deranged industrial drugs manufacturer @@RANDOMNAME@@, vials of @@HIS@@ latest syntheses displayed on your desk. "My stuff sells well because it feels good. Why deny upstanding citizens the right to that? In fact, our trials have shown tremendous progress in the development of even stronger products, set to be released onto the streets this week! It's too late to go back now, @@LEADER@@... I say we move forward into this profitable oblivion."
OUTCOME:
the streets of @@NAME@@ are awash with zombified dragon chasers
OPTION 3
"How can you justify putting the lives of our people at risk like this?" probes your Health Secretary @@RANDOMNAME@@, staring at the drugs manufacturer with terrifying malice. "Is it not obvious to you that these substances need to be regulated, even just a little tighter? It's completely inhumane to allow them in such potent quantities anywhere in @@NAME@@, and you're only making it worse even entertaining these exploitative manufacturers! The government should be in charge of all drug production and distribute these substances based solely on avoiding overdoses."
OUTCOME:
drug addictions are state controlled
TITLE: Having A Dead Good Time
VALIDITY: lenient drug laws, musical
DESCRIPTION:
After a surge in drug-related deaths at this year's biggest @@DEMONYM@@ festivals left families and event promotors devastated, security and harm reduction measures at mainstream music events are now under the microscope of the general public.
OPTION 1
"From our p-passionate management and staff," mumbles the HoppedUp festival press manager @@RANDOMNAME@@, glancing skittishly at the group of investment directors listening in the corner, "our prayers go out to the families affected. We always try our best to ensure the safety of our festival-goers, which is why at all upcoming events, we'll have professionally-trained harm reduction staff on hand to identify and prevent dangerous drug-related situations before they escalate," @@HE@@ scans the room nervously, @@HIS@@ sales manager at the back of the room nodding with approval, " so g-get your tickets now for thirty percent off!"
OUTCOME:
drugged-up festival goers hop in and out of medical tents in-between fixes
OPTION 2
"You mean to say you want to make it safer to do drugs at these filthy festivals in the first place?!" scolds distraught school teacher @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@, clutching her late son's bucket hat. "My boy is dead because security let a drug dealer slip through the cracks!" She addresses you with a stern, unshaken stare, "The issue doesn't lay with event organizers, it lays in the hands of the police. We need to enforce much heavier security at these events and tighter drug laws across the nation!"
OUTCOME:
police officers spend more time strip-searching people at festival gates than they do fighting actual crime
OPTION 3
"These events are causing more problems than they ever solved," mutters @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Senior Advisor on Ruining Fun, a bitter smirk spreading across @@HIS@@ face, " so why don't we just ban them? It's clear the youth intend to take copious amounts of drugs at them no matter what we do, so let's not give them any more chances than we should, and you should definitely criminalise all drugs as well... tighter restrictions just make for more creative abusers." @@HE@@ slumps back into his chair, visibly avoiding fun thoughts.
OUTCOME:
illegal underground raves and drug parties ravage the youth
OPTION 4
"Do we need to catastrophize everything?" asks @@RANDOMNAME@@, President of the @@DEMONYM@@ Drug Awareness Association, a distinctly earthy stench filling the room, "The problem is not with drugs, or even with the festival staff, but with the quality of education and societal awareness of substances themselves!" @@HE@@ clicks to the next slide, showing pictures of people taking drugs and having a good time, "See? No matter what deterrents we put in place, curiosity will always find a way up people's noses and into their veins, so it's about time we stop pushing a stigmatic narrative on drugs and start teaching fresh curriculum on not just the dangers, but also the medicinal benefits of some of these very interesting substances."
OUTCOME:
preschoolers can be heard reciting drug names alphabetically during recess
TITLE: Having A Dead Good Time
VALIDITY: lenient drug laws, musical
DESCRIPTION:
After a surge in drug-related deaths at this year's biggest @@DEMONYM@@ festivals left families and event promotors devastated, security and harm reduction measures at mainstream music events are now under the microscope.
OPTION 1
"From our passionate management and staff," blurts @@RANDOMMALENAME@@, public relations manager for HoppedUp, the nation's largest mainstream music festival, "our prayers go out to the families affected. We always try out best to ensure the safety of our Hoppers, which is why at our upcoming events," he says as he hands out leaflets and business cards to your assistants, "we'll have even more professionally-trained harm reduction staff on hand to identify and prevent dangerous drug-related situations before they escalate." He scans the room with a huge grin, his sales manager at the back of the room nodding with approval, "Get your tickets now for thirty percent off!"
OUTCOME:
drugged-up festival goers hop in and out of medical tents in between hits
OPTION 2
"You mean to say you want to make it safer to do drugs in the first place?" scolds @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@, clutching her son's bucket hat. "My son is dead because the security at these filthy festivals let a drug dealer slip through the cracks!" She addresses you with a stern, unshaken stare, "The issue doesn't lay with event organizers, it lays in the hands of the police. At the very least, we need much heavier security at these events and tighter drug detection measures across the nation."
OUTCOME:
police officers spend more time strip-searching people at supermarket entrances than they do fighting actual crime
OPTION 3
"These festivals are causing more problems than they ever solved," mutters @@RANDOMMALENAME@@, your Senior Advisor on Ruining Fun, a bitter smirk spreading across his face, " so why don't we just ban them? It's clear the youth intend to take copious amounts of drugs at them no matter what we do, so let's not give them any more chances than we should." He slumps back into his chair, visibly avoiding fun thoughts.
OUTCOME:
illegal underground raves and secret drug parties make up the average teenager's lifestyle
OPTION 4
"Do we need to catastrophize everything?" asks @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@, President of the @@DEMONYM@@ Drug Awareness Association, a distinctly earthy stench filling the room, "The problem is not with drugs, or even with the festival staff, but with the quality of education and societal awareness of substances themselves!" She clicks to the next slide, showing pictures of people taking drugs and having a good time, "See? No matter what deterrents we put in place, curiosity will always find a way up people's noses and into their veins, so it's about time we stop pushing a stigmatic narrative on drugs and start teaching fresh curriculum on not just the dangers, but also the medicinal benefits of some of these very interesting substances."
OUTCOME:
preschoolers can be heard reciting drug names alphabetically during recess
TITLE: Having A Dead Good Time
VALIDITY: lenient drug laws, musical
DESCRIPTION:
Family members and event public relations managers were devastated after a surge in drug-related deaths at this year's biggest @@DEMONYM@@ festivals as security and harm reduction procedures at mainstream musical events were brought under the microscope.
OPTION 1
"From all of our management and staff," interjects @@RANDOMMALENAME@@, public relations manager for HoppedUp, the nation's largest mainstream music festival, "we truly do empathise and always ensure the safety of our Hoppers comes first, which is why at all of our upcoming events," for which he begins handing out leaflets and business cards, "we'll have even more professionally-trained harm reduction staff on hand to identify and prevent dangerous drug-related situations before they take place," He scans the room with a huge grin, his sales manager at the back of the room nodding with approval, "get your tickets now for thirty percent off!"
OUTCOME:
drugged-up festival goers hop in and out of medical tents in between hits
OPTION 2
"You mean to say you want to make it safer to do drugs in the first place? My sixteen-year-old son is dead because the security at these festivals, which by the way are a haven for young adults to try whatever garbage they can get their hands on, couldn't be bothered to properly check the man who sold him whatever it was he took," scolds @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@, clutching her son's bucket hat, "the issue doesn't lay with event organisers, it should lay in the hands of the police," she looks over to you with stern, unshaken eyes, "at the very least, we need much tighter security at these events and much tighter drug detection measures across the nation."
OUTCOME:
police officers spend more time strip searching people at supermarket entrances than they do fighting actual crime
OPTION 3
"Seems like these festivals are causing more chaos than they ever fixed," mutters @@RANDOMMALENAME@@, your Senior Advisor on Ruining Fun, a terribly bitter half-smile spreading across his face, "how about, we just ban them? It's clear young people find them so appealing, especially if they're going to do copious amounts of drugs there anyway, so let's not give them any more chances than we should," he slumps back into his chair, visibly avoiding fun thoughts.
OUTCOME:
illegal underground raves and secret drug parties make up the average teenagers lifestyle
OPTION 4
"Do we need to catastrophize everything?" asks @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@, President of the @@DEMONYM@@ Drug Awareness Association, a distinctly earthy smell filling the room, "The problem is not with drugs, or even with the festival staff, but with the quality of education and societal awareness of substances themselves!" She clicks to the next slide, showing pictures of people taking drugs and having a good time, "See? No matter what deterrents we put in place, curiosity will always find a way up people's noses and into their veins, so it's about time we stop pushing a stigmatic narrative on drugs and start teaching fresh curriculum on not just the dangers, but also the medicinal benefits of some of these very interesting substances."
OUTCOME:
preschoolers can be heard reciting drug names alphabetically during recess
