Description
After an outstanding performance in the 100 meter dash at the @@REGION@@ Games , the "@@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ sensation" Insane Volt has been accused of using performance enhancing substances. Mr. Volt claims the substance in question, occasionally refered to as 'edible nitrous,' has not yet been banned by the Department of Athletics. In any case, this has caused a ruckess among health advocates and the Department of Health.
Option 1:
"This is an outrage!" proclaims health advocate @@RANDOMNAME@@ as @@HE@@ mistakenly swats a vegan burger out of your secretary's hands. "For far too long we have allowed people to consume potentially harmful substances all in the name of competition or physique. We need greater regulation making consumption of foods, substances, you name it, outside of our database illegal until registered!"
Chefs are always worried they are being a bit too creative.
Option 2:
"Woah woah woah you've got it all wrong" says Mr. Volt as he ironically tries to slow down the conversation. "This, this... remedy you guys are complaining about isn't harmful at all. Sure sometimes it causes me to shout words at random, or pull a few all nighters in a row, but my family has enjoyed it for years. Besides it maximizes my capacity and it isn't even addictive... or at least that's what my uncle said."
Behavioral scientists are not quite sure what is healthy anymore.
Option 3:
"Hey guys that's great and all, but let's not forget about the consequences it poses on competiton" interjects the Minister of Atheltics Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@. "How about this, all registered athletes should have to declare all foods and substances they plan on taking and have taken a year from the competition start date. Yeah it's not perfect but this is a good start and will give us time to research and regulate."
Athletes level of play is suspiciously getting worse.
Option 4:
"Hey, the way I see it, this man only did us all a services," snarkly remarks previously juiced athlete and sports enthusiast @@RANDOMNAME@@. "Look, I like winners, we all like winners. Why not let the state help out our fellow brothers and sister in international competiton, if you know what I mean."
The phrase "the end always justify the means" is commonly used by trainers.
