CURRENT DRAFT:
[Title] God Save The Queens
[Validity] Has Monarchy, has Marriage Equality
[Description] This week's international media circus saw the crown prince of Skandilund steal the show, after he had been caught sharing an intimate moment with another man in the palace gardens, evoking both ire and praise from the denizens of @@REGION@@. Yet in the midst of the media fever, your nation's tabloids managed to turn all eyes on @@NAME@@'s heir apparent by asking what response would be evoked domestically, if the royal family’s most prized scion married someone of the same sex.
[Option 1] "Are we not a nation where anyone, even a royal, is free to marry who they fancy?" notes openly homosexual TV host @@RANDOMMALENAME@@ on live air, his gaze continuously flickering to the iced coffee left unattended on the studio desk, his hand edging ever closer to it. "Our future sovereign is as much entitled to the law on same sex marriages as any other @@DEMONYMPLURAL@@. And we currently have someone second in line to the throne, do we not? Let them be happy about the order in which they were born for once!"
[Effect 1] younger siblings are among the nation's most fervent LGBTQ supporters these days
[Option 2] "Let's take it a step further," says interviewee @@RANDOMNAME@@ while trying to keep track of @@HIS@@ cabal of adoptees at a pro-LGBT rally. "If we truly want the royals to be seen as any other @@DEMONYM@@, we must allow adopted children into the line of succession! It was a common practice among the cultures of old, like with the Romulan Imperators. I don't see why we couldn't bring it back to give any future monarch options if need be! And as a side bonus, we'll finally get to acquaint the royals with a little genetic diversification..."
[Effect 2] @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ royals love to remind their siblings who was adopted first
[Option 3] "Surely you would not want to risk a Bigtopian orphan sitting on the throne?" enunciates the notoriously traditionalist mayor of @@CAPITAL@@ John Borison to the TV host, his vividly blonde toupée sticking out eccentrically just like his personality. "The foreign fiends have already thieved all of our jobs, and those fruity folks have taken over marriages, now they're reaching for our crown jewels as well? I say enough! We must keep the royal marriages traditional and native: a man and a woman, and a true @@DEMONYM@@ with a true @@DEMONYM@@. Say, I happen to have a fine, wholly @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ sibling available..."
[Effect 3] the royals are keeping it straight for the state
[Option 4] "The fairytale of 'finding true love' is meant for the common folk, not individuals of our stature," huffs a senior member of the royal family. "A royal should marry someone out of duty to family and state, someone with connections to other royal houses or notable families. I propose any matters of matrimony be arranged by our family alone, for the good of the realm. It has reached my ear that Althaniq has a suitable candidate for our prized scion, one whose beauty and grace supposedly caused dozens of suitors to duel to the death. Surely, its veracity is unquestionable!"
[Effect 4] the royal family knows like no other that beauty really is in the eye of the beholder