[DRAFT] The Dog Ate My Vote

[Sacara]

If anyone has any better recommendations for a title, I'm all ears.

[Name] The Dog Ate My Vote
[Desc] Embarrassingly, your party came up one vote short on passing a crucial piece of legislation yesterday. All eyes are now on @@RANDOMNAME(1)@@, a legislator from your party who was seen eating ice cream just down the road while the vote was taking place. Further investigation shows @@RANDOMLASTNAME(1)@@ was absent for over 70% of votes taken in the past year.
[Validity] is a democracy

[option] "The people lose their voice when their elected representatives decide not to show up to work," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, the head of a congressional watchdog group. "In this case, I bet most of @@HIS(1)@@ constituents haven't even realized how many votes @@HE(1)@@'s missed. The only way to fix this is to send all @@DEMONYMNOUNPLURAL@@ monthly reports of their legislator's voting record. Once voters are equipped with this information, they will probably make the right choice once the next election rolls around. I hope."
[effect] multiple legislators have been grounded by their parents after receiving disappointing report cards

[option] "What's the only thing politicians care more about than votes? The amount of @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ in their pocket," says your chief of staff, counting the amount of @@CURENCYPLURAL@@ in @@HIS@@ pocket. "Right now, there isn't any incentive for legislators to work; they get paid the same whether they only vote once or every time. We could fix this by tying their salary directly into their attendance record. For every vote they miss, they get docked a sum of money. You could even make it a competition and give a bonus to those who vote the most often."
[effect] the government blackmails legislators into doing their jobs

[option] "Hey, slow down! I was out speaking with my constituents, which I frankly don't think my peers do enough of," responds @@RANDOMLASTNAME(1)@@. "While my voting record may not be perfect, I can still point you to my laundry list of achievements that I, uh, must have left in my other jacket. Instead of forcing me to be present to vote, I should be allowed to call in and vote over the phone from wherever I want to. This way I can both keep meeting with my constituents and fulfill the duties of my job."
[effect] the halls of congress are filled with tumbleweeds and low-level aides

[option] "What other job lets you constantly miss going to work?" asks your disgruntled janitor, taking the bag out of your garbage can and violently slamming the lid shut. "This is another example of politicians playing by a different set of rules than the rest of society. We elect these people to make nationally important decisions, and they can't even be bothered to show up. Legislators should be mandated to participate in every vote, and if they don't, we can hold a new election to find someone who actually cares about their voters."
[effect] legislators on their deathbeds are carried into the chamber to vote

[Name] The Dog Ate My Vote
[Desc] Embarrassingly, your party came up one vote short on passing a crucial piece of legislation yesterday. All eyes are now on @@RANDOMNAME(1)@@, a legislator from your party who was seen eating ice cream just down the road while the vote was taking place. Further investigation shows @@RANDOMLASTNAME(1)@@ was absent for over 70% of votes taken in the past year.
[Validity] is a democracy

[option] "The people lose their voice when their elected representatives decide not to show up to work," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, the head of a congressional watchdog group. "Right now, there really isn't an incentive for legislators to work; they get paid the same whether they only vote once or every time. We could fix this by tying their salary directly into their attendance record. For every vote they miss, they get docked a sum of money. You could even make it a competition and give a bonus to those who vote the most often."
[effect] the government blackmails legislators to do their jobs

[option] "Hey, slow down! I was speaking with my constituents like any good politician should be doing," responds @@RANDOMLASTNAME(1)@@. "While my voting record may not be perfect, I can still point you to my laundry list of achievements that I, uh, must have left in my other jacket. Instead of forcing me to physically be present to be able to vote, I should be allowed to call in and vote over the phone from wherever I want. This way I can both keep meeting with my constituents and fulfill the duties of my job."
[effect] the halls of congress are filled with tumbleweeds and low-level aides

[option] "This is another example of politicians playing by a different set of rules than the rest of society," says your disgruntled janitor, taking the bag out of your garbage can and slamming the lid shut. "What other job lets you consistently skip out on working? We elect these people to make nationally important decisions, and they can't even be bothered to show up. Legislators should be mandated to participate in every vote, and they should be removed from office. We will hold a new election to find someone else who actually cares about their voters."
[effect] legislators on their deathbeds are carried into the chamber to vote

[Bears Armed]

Interesting idea.

i'd change the third option's Effect line to something more like "legislators on their deathbeds are carried into the chamber to vote".

[USS Monitor]

When I saw the title, I was expecting an issue about animal citizens or mail-in ballots. (Mail-in ballots could get lost or destroyed in various ways including being eaten by pets.)

This draft is not bad, though.

[Sacara]

I'd change the third option's Effect line to something more like "legislators on their deathbeds are carried into the chamber to vote."

Yes.

When I saw the title, I was expecting an issue about animal citizens or mail-in ballots. (Mail-in ballots could get lost or destroyed in various ways, including being eaten by pets.)

I agree, we can find a better & more descriptive title for this draft, but I couldn't think of one for the life of me yesterday. Those are good ideas for another draft.

Had an idea about the options when I woke up this morning. Thinking about adding a new option and placing it as the first one. It would be the watchdog speaker and he would be advocating for more transparency by compiling a list of the attendance records, publishing them, and sending them to each legislator's constituents. I would have to change the speaker in the docked salary option.

What do you guys think of that?

[Bears Armed]

Had an idea about the options when I woke up this morning. Thinking about adding a new option and placing it as the first one. It would be the watchdog speaker and he would be advocating for more transparency by compiling a list of the attendance records, publishing them, and sending them to each legislator's constituents. I would have to change the speaker in the docked salary option.

What do you guys think of that?

That looks reasonable.

[Sacara]

Draft two is now up. Added another option, changed some speakers around, tightened up the wording here and there.

If anyone has any suggestions for a new title, I'm currently on the hunt for one.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

Great issue.

My only criticism is that the last sentence here...

[option] "Hey, slow down! I was out speaking with my constituents, which I frankly don't think my peers do enough of," responds @@RANDOMLASTNAME(1)@@. "While my voting record may not be perfect, I can still point you to my laundry list of achievements that I, uh, must have left in my other jacket. Instead of forcing me to be present to vote, I should be allowed to call in and vote over the phone from wherever I want to. This way I can both keep meeting with my constituents and fulfill the duties of my job."

...sounds like an admission that it was the legislator's duty to turn up to vote, which is as good as an admission of wrongdoing, which is something politicians only do in extremis, and then only with their "heartfelt apology" and "honest admission" faces on, rather than being their usual defensive selves. I'd suggest instead:

[option] "Hey, slow down! I was out speaking with my constituents, which I frankly don't think my peers do enough of," responds @@RANDOMLASTNAME(1)@@. "While my voting record may not be perfect, I can still point you to my laundry list of achievements that I, uh, must have left in my other jacket. Instead of forcing me to be present to vote, I should be allowed to call in and vote over the phone from wherever I want to. This way I can put my votes in while still fulfilling the duties of my job."

See? Way more weaselly!

[Australian rePublic]

How did anyone know that a vote was happening at that very moment? For all they know they might have had a break

[Bears Armed]

How did anyone know that a vote was happening at that very moment? For all they know they might have had a break

For RL Westminster there's a signal sent out (presumably before this via pager, now to mobile phones) a few minutes in advance, so that any MPs who are outside the chamber but not too far away can get back to vote.

[Australian rePublic]

How did anyone know that a vote was happening at that very moment? For all they know they might have had a break

For RL Westminster there's a signal sent out (presumably before this via pager, now to mobile phones) a few minutes in advance, so that any MPs who are outside the chamber but not too far away can get back to vote.

How does the general public know?

[Bears Armed]

For RL Westminster there's a signal sent out (presumably before this via pager, now to mobile phones) a few minutes in advance, so that any MPs who are outside the chamber but not too far away can get back to vote.

How does the general public know?

They can read the list of who voted which way when the next issue of the parliamentary gazette, 'Hansard', is produced.
(Checking on wikipedia -- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hansard -- I see that the numerous other political entities with their own versions of this include Australia and, separately, at least three of its states i.e. Southern Australia, Victoria, & NSW.)
For votes on matters of importance & high public interest (e.g. the Brexit legislation), lists of the MPs who voted each way are also commonly given in the more serious of the national newspapers.

[Australian rePublic]

How does the general public know?

They can read the list of who voted which way when the next issue of the parliamentary gazette, 'Hansard', is produced.
(Checking on wikipedia -- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hansard -- I see that the numerous other political entities with their own versions of this include Australia and, separately, at least three of its states i.e. Southern Australia, Victoria, & NSW.)
For votes on matters of importance & high public interest (e.g. the Brexit legislation), lists of the MPs who voted each way are also commonly given in the more serious of the national newspapers.

I see. Or maybe you could say it was televised and that person who reported the incident hapoened to be sitting in the same cage, watching the broadcast

[Bears Armed]

They can read the list of who voted which way when the next issue of the parliamentary gazette, 'Hansard', is produced.
(Checking on wikipedia -- https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hansard -- I see that the numerous other political entities with their own versions of this include Australia and, separately, at least three of its states i.e. Southern Australia, Victoria, & NSW.)
For votes on matters of importance & high public interest (e.g. the Brexit legislation), lists of the MPs who voted each way are also commonly given in the more serious of the national newspapers.

I see. Or maybe you could say it was televised and that person who reported the incident hapoened to be sitting in the same cage, watching the broadcast

Isn't whether or not the legislature's proceedings get televised already the subject of another issue, which means that if you take this route then the validity would have to take that into account?

[Trotterdam]

Isn't whether or not the legislature's proceedings get televised already the subject of another issue, which means that if you take this route then the validity would have to take that into account?

Only a crazy option about making political proceedings deliberately wacky so they make for better television. Whether normal politics get televised isn't really discussed as far as I can remember.

[Bears Armed]

Isn't whether or not the legislature's proceedings get televised already the subject of another issue, which means that if you take this route then the validity would have to take that into account?

Only a crazy option about making political proceedings deliberately wacky so they make for better television. Whether normal politics get televised isn't really discussed as far as I can remember.

Hr'rmm, then maybe that's a viable idea for a new issue as well...

[Tinhampton]

@@RANDOMNAME(1)@@, a legislator from your party who was seen eating ice cream just down the road while the vote was taking place

What - no vote-eating dogs?