Draft 5:
[title] Weather or Not?
[desc] Lately, @@DENONYMPLURAL@@ have shown much frustration with @@NAME@@’s horrendous, unusual, and sometimes dangerous weather patterns. After a devastating hurricane ripped through @@NAME@@ last week, destroying many homes and businesses, many have been debating whether or not something should be done about the weather.
[validity] Must have low Weather stat
[option]"Frankly, our weather sucks,” says Frank Frazzle, infamous for his chronic frankness. “The climate around these parts frankly isn’t to my taste, and I’m sure my fellow citizens would agree. To be frank, I would suggest you compensate those families and businesses directly affected by this nation’s rabid weather with a hefty amount of @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ from here on out. And I believe that’s all I have to be frank about.” Frank walks away into the increasing precipitation whilst consuming a frankfurter topped with now-drenched yellow mustard.
[effect]parents actively encourage their children to flood the bathtub in order to receive government welfare for weather-related incidents
[option]“I’m convinced Frank over there was on the right track, but I think I can do you one better,” interjects @@RANDOMNAME@@, popular futurist and head sales employee of Weather-Tec, “Here’s my proposition, I think what @@NAME@@ needs is Weather-Tec’s ClimateCapsule3000. With just the press of a button and the launch of a low-grade rocket containing one of our ClimateCapsule3000s, all of @@NAME@@’s weather-related issues will be gone, poof! Blue skies and sunshine guaranteed! Just sign here, @@LEADER@@, to be the new top customer of Weather-Tec! We’ll discuss the prices later. What do you say?”
[effect]@@DENOYMPURAL@@ reminisce about the days when the water wasn't tinted Weather-Tec green
[option_validity] Must have Capitalism or Socialism installed and must have high or moderate Scientific Advancement stat
[option]"Clearly, you’re missing the point,” explains @@RANDOMNAME@@ snarkily, as @@HE@@ closes @@HIS@@ umbrella and shakes pools of water off his thoroughly trenched raincoat, “Using money as a means to prevent or repay damages is counterproductive. You’ll just end up taxing people more, and people hate taxes more than they hate natural disasters, right? You just need to tell the people to toughen up and pull themselves up by their own bootstraps. Sure, some people might lose everything they own, but I assure you that being idle in this situation will pay off in the big picture.” He exits the scene and is promptly showered by a stream of water outside.
[effect]families unable to pay for food and clean water after losing their homes to floods are told by the government to “toughen up”
