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[DRAFT] Postage Necessary (formerly Going Postal)

A place to spoil daily issues for those who haven't had them yet, snigger at typos, and discuss ideas for new ones.
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Intrapolia
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Founded: Nov 28, 2016
Ex-Nation

[DRAFT] Postage Necessary (formerly Going Postal)

Postby Intrapolia » Mon Nov 16, 2020 2:50 pm

Inspired by the unique story of the Dag Hammarskjold invert stamp, as well as stamp errors in general.
Title: Postage Necessary

Validity: All nations.

Description: The @@NAME@@ Postal Service has accidentally issued a misprinted stamp depicting a three-legged @@ANIMAL@@. The extremely rare error is estimated to be worth approximately 20 million @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@.

Option: "Do you know how much 20 million @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ is?!?!?", exclaims @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Secretary of Finance. "That's enough to put a community college in every major @@DEMONYM@@ city alone! I say we reclaim the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@ from its owner as government property and auction it off for funding."
Effect: Employers are hesitant to hire graduates of Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@ University.

Option: "Finders, keepers!", boasts @@RANDOMNAME@@, current owner of the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@. "I bought this stamp fair and square from a @@DEMONYM@@ post office. Actually, why do we even have post offices anymore? I've always sent and received all my important information through email. If you really want funding, I know where I'd start slashing."
Effect: The @@NAME@@ Postal Service doesn't have a leg to stand on.

Option: "The Postal Service is not in the business of making millionaires!", says Postmaster General @@RANDOMNAME@@. "Stamps are for one thing: sending letters. It's only fair that we reprint a special issue of the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@ to reduce its rarity and send it back to face value!"
Effect: (TBD)

Title: Postage Necessary

Validity: All nations.

Description: The @@NAME@@ Postal Service has accidentally issued a misprinted stamp depicting a three-legged @@ANIMAL@@. The extremely rare error is estimated to be worth approximately 20 million @@CURRENCY@@s.

Option: "Do you know how much 20 million @@CURRENCY@@ is?!?!?", exclaims @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Secretary of Finance. "That's enough to put a community college in every major @@DEMONYM@@ city alone! I say we reclaim the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@ from its owner as government property and auction it off for funding."
Effect: Employers are hesitant to hire graduates of Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@ University.

Option: "Finders, keepers!", boasts @@RANDOMNAME@@, current owner of the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@. "I bought this stamp fair and square from a @@DEMONYM@@ post office. Actually, why do we even have post offices anymore? I've always sent and received all my important information through email. If you really want funding, I know where I'd start slashing."
Effect: The @@NAME@@ Postal Service doesn't have a leg to stand on.

Option: "The Postal Service is not in the business of making millionaires!", says Postmaster General @@RANDOMNAME@@. "Stamps are for one thing: sending letters. It's only fair that we reprint a special issue of the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@ to reduce its rarity and send it back to its face value of 5 cents!"
Effect:


Title: Going Postal

Validity: All nations.

Description: The @@NAME@@ Postal Service has accidentally issued a misprinted stamp depicting a three-legged @@ANIMAL@@. The extremely rare error is estimated to be worth approximately 30 trillion @@CURRENCY@@s.

Option: "Do you know how much 30 trillion @@CURRENCY@@ is?!?!?", exclaims @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Finance. "That's enough to put a community college in every @@DEMONYM@@ city alone! I say we reclaim the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@ from its owner as government property and auction it off for funding."
Effect: Employers are hesitant to hire graduates of Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@ University.

Option: "Finders, keepers!", boasts @@RANDOMNAME@@, current owner of the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@. "I bought this stamp fair and square from a @@DEMONYM@@ post office. It's my property, and I should do whatever I like with it."
Effect: TBD.

Option: "The Postal Service is not in the business of making trillionaires!", says Postmaster General @@RANDOMNAME@@. "It's only fair that we reprint a special issue of the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@ to reduce its rarity and send it back to its face value of 5 cents!"
Effect: Opportunities for financial gain are stamped out. (Needs work)
Last edited by Intrapolia on Tue Nov 17, 2020 7:15 am, edited 3 times in total.
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Baloo Kingdom
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Postby Baloo Kingdom » Mon Nov 16, 2020 3:25 pm

Intrapolia wrote:Inspired by the unique story of the Dag Hammarskjold invert stamp.
Title: Going Postal

Validity: All nations.

Description: The @@NAME@@ Postal Service has accidentally issued a misprinted stamp depicting a three-legged @@ANIMAL@@. The extremely rare error is estimated to be worth approximately 30 trillion @@CURRENCY@@s.

Option: "Do you know how much 30 trillion @@CURRENCY@@ is?!?!?", exclaims @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Finance. "That's enough to put a community college in every @@DEMONYM@@ city alone! I say we reclaim the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@ from its owner as government property and auction it off for funding."
Effect: Employers are hesitant to hire graduates of Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@ University.

Option: "Finders, keepers!", boasts @@RANDOMNAME@@, current owner of the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@. "I bought this stamp fair and square from a @@DEMONYM@@ post office. It's my property, and I should do whatever I like with it."
Effect: TBD.

Option: "The Postal Service is not in the business of making trillionaires!", says Postmaster General @@RANDOMNAME@@. "It's only fair that we reprint a special issue of the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@ to reduce its rarity and send it back to its face value of 5 cents!"
Effect: Opportunities for financial gain are stamped out. (Needs work)

You may want to make Option 1 only valid for non-dictatorial nations as it mentions a minister of sorts. This may not be needed, just a suggestion.
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The New California Republic
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Postby The New California Republic » Mon Nov 16, 2020 3:29 pm

30 trillion is a bit extreme. There is some suspension of disbelief as far as issues go, but that's pushing it too far I think.
Last edited by Sigmund Freud on Sat Sep 23, 1939 2:23 am, edited 999 times in total.
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Baloo Kingdom
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Postby Baloo Kingdom » Mon Nov 16, 2020 3:31 pm

The New California Republic wrote:30 trillion is a bit extreme. There is some suspension of disbelief as far as issues go, but that's pushing it too far I think.

I agree, maybe turn trillions to billions at least
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The New California Republic
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Postby The New California Republic » Mon Nov 16, 2020 3:34 pm

Baloo Kingdom wrote:
The New California Republic wrote:30 trillion is a bit extreme. There is some suspension of disbelief as far as issues go, but that's pushing it too far I think.

I agree, maybe turn trillions to billions at least

Even billions is too much. Millions is more like it, as there have been stamps that have sold for millions.
Last edited by Sigmund Freud on Sat Sep 23, 1939 2:23 am, edited 999 times in total.
The Irradiated Wasteland of The New California Republic: depicting the expanded NCR, several years after the total victory over Caesar's Legion, and the annexation of New Vegas and its surrounding areas.
White-collared conservatives flashing down the street
Pointing their plastic finger at me
They're hoping soon, my kind will drop and die
But I'm going to wave my freak flag high
Wave on, wave on
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Sorianora
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Postby Sorianora » Mon Nov 16, 2020 3:40 pm

The New California Republic wrote:
Baloo Kingdom wrote:I agree, maybe turn trillions to billions at least

Even billions is too much. Millions is more like it, as there have been stamps that have sold for millions.


Agreed, it should be around 15-20 million tops.
Last edited by Sorianora on Mon Nov 16, 2020 3:50 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Nooooooooooooooo
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Postby Nooooooooooooooo » Mon Nov 16, 2020 11:25 pm

Intrapolia wrote:-snip-

You should replace @@CURRENCY@@s with @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@. Also, replace cents with something else.
Last edited by Nooooooooooooooo on Mon Nov 16, 2020 11:29 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Australian rePublic
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Postby Australian rePublic » Tue Nov 17, 2020 1:39 am

Just continuing issuing the wrong stamps until they run out and then issue the correct one
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Intrapolia
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Ex-Nation

Postby Intrapolia » Tue Nov 17, 2020 7:14 am

Australian rePublic wrote:Just continuing issuing the wrong stamps until they run out and then issue the correct one

What do you mean by this? The concept of an error stamp is that it's a one-time printing error.

Nooooooooooooooo wrote:
Intrapolia wrote:-snip-

You should replace @@CURRENCY@@s with @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@. Also, replace cents with something else.

Sorianora wrote:-snip-
Agreed, it should be around 15-20 million tops.


Thanks for your input, everyone!
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Intrapolia
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Postby Intrapolia » Sat Nov 21, 2020 9:27 am

Bump
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The Ferret Lands
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Postby The Ferret Lands » Mon Dec 07, 2020 12:49 am

Intrapolia wrote:
Option: "Do you know how much 20 million @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ is?!?!?", exclaims @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Secretary of Finance. "That's enough to put a community college in every major @@DEMONYM@@ city alone! I say we reclaim the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@ from its owner as government property and auction it off for funding."

Option: "Finders, keepers!", boasts @@RANDOMNAME@@, current owner of the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@. "I bought this stamp fair and square from a @@DEMONYM@@ post office. Actually, why do we even have post offices anymore? I've always sent and received all my important information through email. If you really want funding, I know where I'd start slashing."

Option: "The Postal Service is not in the business of making millionaires!", says Postmaster General @@RANDOMNAME@@. "Stamps are for one thing: sending letters. It's only fair that we reprint a special issue of the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@ to reduce its rarity and send it back to face value!"


So the three options are....
Take the stamp back
Make more stamps
Abolish the entire postal system????????????

One of these is not like the others.....
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Westinor
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Postby Westinor » Mon Dec 07, 2020 11:01 pm

Intrapolia wrote:"Do you know how much 20 million @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ is?!?!?", exclaims @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Secretary of Finance. "That's enough to put a community college in every major @@DEMONYM@@ city alone! I say we reclaim the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@ from its owner as government property and auction it off for funding."
I don't really know a lot about stamps, so I'm just going with what my limited reading for this issue has told me. First off, I'd try to avoid concrete numbers and references in regards to currency - here, the biggest offender is the reference to the community colleges, which I think isn't appropriate here. Try to give something more ambiguous as an example, or perhaps something so wacky it characterizes the character more. I think it would be nice to emphasize that the problem is in the loss of funding and the need to make up for that gap in funding (moreso than you have now). Perhaps consider adding an extra sentence before the last sentence that explains the need for closing the funding gap, or whatever the issue is here. I myself don't understand how this cost the government 20 million @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@, so I'm not confident enough to offer a suggestion.

Intrapolia wrote:"Finders, keepers!", boasts @@RANDOMNAME@@, current owner of the Three-Legged @@ANIMAL@@. "I bought this stamp fair and square from a @@DEMONYM@@ post office. Actually, why do we even have post offices anymore? I've always sent and received all my important information through email. If you really want funding, I know where I'd start slashing."

Firstly, would it be appropriate to add "stamp" behind the "Three Legged @@ANIMAL@@" here? Again, not familiar with stamps so I'm not sure. Also, while you've noted that the speaker only gets important information from email, I still find it strange personally that they've somehow ended up the owner of this rare stamp. It doesn't seem to fit very well and is a bit of a pivot from the character.

Something to do with Leader's face on a stamp being reprinted several million times might be fun for the last effect line, or at least the starting point. Just a suggestion.

That's all I've got right now. Also note that you shouldn't end effect lines in punctuation or capitalize them.
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Fauxia
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Postby Fauxia » Tue Dec 08, 2020 10:19 am

Even 20 million seems too high. Generally issues seem to assume price levels around dollar/euro/pound, so even 1 million is quite a hefty sum for a stamp.

I like the topic, but the entire issue right now seems gaunt. There's just not a lot going on. Option 2, especially, doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me. How did he get the stamps in the first place if he always uses email? It would seem like he'd want more and support the Post Office continuing to print stamps. Maybe instead he should say the post office should issue small amounts of rare stamps as a sort of jackpot every year. Or that can be option 1 and he can say something else.
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