[SUBMITTED] Dirty Deals

[Jutsa]

Thought about this one since my shedding light and cadmium draft, kinda surprised it hadn't been done before (unless it had and my ctrl+f-ing skills failed me).
Keeping with the theme of having two existing issues starting with "One Nation's Trash is—"
Also, totally snuck in both an autarky reversal option AND a reference to #97.1

Title: Dirty Deals
The Issue: Corporations from the United Federation have offered to pay your nation to take care of their garbage.
Validity: below powerhouse economy

Option 1: "I'm sure you'll fahnd this here business proposal's in yer beyust interest, pardner," suggests United Federation CEO of Got Garbage? Inc. Mr. Natas, lifting his 20-gallon hat over his star-shaped rose-tinted sunglasses. "You've got the supplah — of space that iyus, and we've got the demayund. And I'm sure a lot of yer poorer kiyun wouldn't mahnd rummagin' through the garbage like the rat—uh, rayutional citizeyuns that they are. Just sahn here, if you would please."
[effect] coastlines are giant slag heaps

Option 2: "Don't you dare sign a deal with this devil," frantically warns your Minister of Skepticism, holding a magnifying glass up to the contract. "Our coastlines are delicate enough without the addition of some foreigner's pizza boxes, broken glass, and literal **** floating around in them. If anything, WE should be offering to sell some of our junk to poorer nations. Let them destroy their own environment, and say no to this contract — wait, is that brimstone?"
[effect] bankruptcy is a small price to pay for trashing neighboring territory

Option 3: "We could have it both ways, while simultaneously becoming even more profitable," suggests your Financial Minister, pulling you aside while the other two fight over the contents of the contract. "They're actually going to pay us for an opportunity to make a profit and provide jobs for thousands! Think about it — a whole workforce dedicated to sifting out reusable material from careless, lazy foreigners, and then selling it back to those same bums for profit! And all for the low low cost of massive deregulation! Which is a good thing, right?"
[effect] people endlessly sift through garbage to find a pay check

Option 4: "Disgusting. You people disgust me with this trash talk," cries environmental activist @@RANDOMNAME@@, sifting through your garbage bins for recyclables. "Do you know how much pollution this practice causes? This much! And I'm telling you now, you'd better demote your skeptical minister, and more importantly publicly condemn and threaten trade sanctions against the United Federation — as well as any other nation caught peddling off their waste."
[effect] people don't want any foreign rubbish

Title: Dirty Deals
The Issue: Corporations from the United Federation have offered to pay your nation to take care of their garbage.
Validity: below powerhouse economy

Option 1: "I'm sure you'll fahnd this here business proposal's in yer beyust interest, pardner," suggests United Federation CEO of Got Garbage? Inc. Mr. Natas, lifting his 20-gallon hat over his star-shaped rose-tinted sunglasses. "We've got the supplah, and you've got the demayund. And I'm sure a lot of yer poorer kiyun wouldn't mahnd rummagin' through the garbage like the rat—uh, rayutional citizeyuns that they are. Just sahn here, if you would please."
[effect] coastlines are giant slag heaps

Option 2: "Don't you dare sign a deal with this devil," frantically warns your Minister of Skepticism, holding a magnifying glass up to the contract. "Our coastlines are delicate enough without the addition of some foreigner's pizza boxes, broken glass, and literal **** floating around in them. If anything, WE should be offering to sell some of our junk to poorer nations. Let them destroy their own environment, and say no to this contract — wait, is that brimstone?"
[effect] bankruptcy is a small price to pay for trashing neighboring territory

Option 3: "We could have it both ways, while simultaneously becoming even more profitable," suggests your Financial Minister, pulling you aside while the other two fight over the contents of the contract. "They're actually going to pay us for an opportunity to make a profit and provide jobs for thousands! Think about it — a whole workforce dedicated to sifting out reusable material from careless, lazy foreigners, and then selling it back to those same bums for profit! And all for the low low cost of massive deregulation! Which is a good thing, right?"
[effect] people endlessly sift through garbage to find a pay check

Option 4: "Disgusting. You people disgust me with this trash talk," cries environmental activist @@RANDOMNAME@@, sifting through your garbage bins for recyclables. "Do you know how much pollution this practice causes? This much! And I'm telling you now, you'd better demote your skeptical minister, and more importantly publicly condemn and threaten trade sanctions against the United Federation — as well as any other nation caught peddling off their waste."
[effect] trash is a national treasure

Title: Dirty Deals
The Issue: Corporations from the United Federation have offered to pay your nation to take care of their garbage.
Validity: below powerhouse economy

Option 1: "I'm sure you'll fahnd this here business proposal's in yer beyust interest, pardner," suggests United Federation CEO of Got Garbage? Inc. Mr. Natas, lifting his 20-gallon hat over his star-shaped rose-tinted sunglasses. "We've got the supplah, and you've got the demayund. And I'm sure a lot of yer poorer kiyun wouldn't mahnd rummagin' through the garbage like the rat—uh, rayutional citizeyuns that they are. Just sahn here, if you would please."
[effect] coastlines are giant slag heaps

Option 2: "Don't you dare sign a deal with this devil," frantically warns your Minister of Skepticism, holding a magnifying glass up to the contract. "Our coastlines are delicate enough without the addition of some foreigner's pizza boxes, broken glass, and literal **** floating around in them. If anything, WE should be offering to sell some of our junk to poorer nations. Let them destroy their own environment, and say no to this contract — wait, is that brimstone?"
[effect] bankruptcy is a small price to pay for trashing neighboring territory

Option 3: "We could have it both ways, while simultaneously becoming even more profitable," suggests your Financial Minister, pulling you aside while the other two fight over the contents of the contract. "They're actually going to pay us for an opportunity to make a profit and provide jobs for thousands! Think about it — a whole workforce dedicated to sifting out reusable material from careless, lazy foreigners, and then selling it back to those same bums for profit! And all for the low low cost of massive deregulation! Which is a good thing, right?"
[effect] people endlessly sift through garbage to find a pay check

Title: One Nation's Trash is a Business Opportunity
The Issue: Corporations from the highly capitalist and rabid consumerist nation of the United Federation has offered to pay your nation to take their trash off their hands.
Validity: Poorer economy

Option 1: "I'm sure it's a sensible business proposal in your best interest," suggests United Federation CEO of Got Garbage? Inc. Mr. Natas, tightening his oversized belt holding up his jeans and pushing his 20-gallon hat off his star-shaped rose-tinted sunglasses. "We've got the supply, and you've got the demand. And I'm sure a lot of your poorer kin wouldn't mind rummaging through the garbage like the rat—er, rational citizens that they are. Just sign here and our people will never know we're not actually shooting our garbage at sun."
[effect] coastlines are giant slag heaps

Validity: Good environmental beauty
Option 2a: "Don't you dare sign a deal with the devil," frantically warns your Minister of Skepticism, holding a magnifying glass up to the contract. "The second you sell out our gorgeous coastlines to be littered with pizza boxes, broken glass, and literal **** is the second you ruin this nation. If anything, WE should be offering to sell some of our junk to poorer nations. Nevermind the fact we can't afford it! Let them destroy their own environment, and say no to this contract — wait, is that brimstone?"
[effect] bankruptcy is a small price to pay for trashing neighboring territory

Validity: Poor environmental beauty
Option 2b: "Don't you dare sign a deal with the devil," frantically warns your Minister of Skepticism, holding a magnifying glass up to the contract. "Our coastlines are toxic enough without the addition of some foreigner's pizza boxes, broken glass, and literal **** floating in the oil slicks. If anything, WE should be offering to sell some of our junk to poorer nations. Nevermind the fact we can't afford it! Let them destroy their own environment, and say no to this contract — wait, is that brimstone?"
[effect] bankruptcy is a small price to pay for trashing neighboring territory

Validity: Capitalist, Not Autarky
Option 3a: "We could have it both ways, while simultaneously becoming even more profitable," suggests your Financial Minister, pulling you aside while the other two fight over the contents of the contract. "They're actually going to pay us for an opportunity to make a profit and provide jobs for thousands. Subsidize industries and loosen safety restrictions, and some insightful companies, which I have no personal stake in, will jump at the chance to give people work — cleaning up the garbage, recycling the good stuff, and selling it back to the United Federation for a profit. It's win-win, you can't lose!"
[effect] people endlessly sift through garbage to find a pay check

Validity: Communist, Not Autarky
Option 3b: "We could have it both ways, while simultaneously becoming even more profitable," suggests your Financial Minister, pulling you aside while the other two fight over the contents of the contract. "They're actually going to pay us for an opportunity to make a profit and provide more useful jobs for thousands. Reallocate some of our workforce to cleaning up the garbage, recycling the good stuff, and selling it back to the United Federation at a profit. It's win-win, you can't lose! So what if it means forgoing safety and public health?"'
[effect] people endlessly sift through garbage to find a pay check

Validity: Autarky
Option 3c: "I don't think them giving us two gifts for the price of one counts as illegal international trading, right?" inquires your Financial Minister, pulling you aside while the other two fight over the contents of the contract. "Of course, it'd be nice if we could go one step further, i.e. sort out reusable material from the junk and sell it back to the United Federation for a profit. Actually, there'd be a lot of things we could make a profit on if we just abolished the ban on international trade; our economy's not doing so hot being self-reliant right now, anyways."
[effect] people endlessly sift through garbage to find a pay check

[Honeydewistania]

Poorer economy is how poor?

Also I don’t think shit should have the first letter uncensored, i like it more suggestive

Anyways good issue

[Trotterdam]

The Issue: Corporations from the highly capitalist and rabid consumerist nation of the United Federation has offered to pay your nation to take its trash off its hands.

I was confused for a while until I realized you meant the United Federation's trash, not @@NAME@@'s trash.

[Jutsa]

Poorer economy is how poor?

Also I don’t think shit should have the first letter uncensored, i like it more suggestive

Anyways good issue

Lol thanks hotfixed the s since I agree with you.
ed: Know what? Not really sure how "poor" an economy we're talking about, but I think I'll let the editors figure that out.

I was confused for a while until I realized you meant the United Federation's trash, not @@NAME@@'s trash.

Yeah, also hotfixed this so instead of "its trash off its hands" it reads "their trash off their hands".]

ed 2: Oh, right, one of the issues is "one man's trash is another man's recyclable" whereas the other is "one nation's trash is another nation's trash".
Gonna leave the title, but I'm open to other title suggestions as well.

[Drasnia]

The Issue: Corporations from the highly capitalist and rabid consumerist nation of the United Federation has offered to pay your nation to take their trash off their hands.

The phrase in blue seems redundant/unimportant to me. I don't think it actually matters what kind of nation UF is, just that corporations from UF are willing to pay for waste disposal.

Red is a grammatical error. 'Corporations' is the subject, not UF thus the verb needs to be pluralized to 'have'.

Validity: Poorer economy

Is it really necessary to restrict this to nations with poor economies? It seems just as valid for nations with strong economies.

Option 1: "I'm sure it's a sensible business proposal in your best interest," suggests United Federation CEO of Got Garbage? Inc. Mr. Natas, tightening his oversized belt holding up his jeans and pushing his 20-gallon hat off his star-shaped rose-tinted sunglasses. "We've got the supply, and you've got the demand. And I'm sure a lot of your poorer kin wouldn't mind rummaging through the garbage like the rat—er, rational citizens that they are. Just sign here and our people will never know we're not actually shooting our garbage at sun."

The description of Satan ... err ... Natas seems a bit verbose to my taste, but I do prefer a more minimalist approach, so opinions will vary. One thing this option really needs though is spicing up with a bit more of an accent - especially when you've spent so much time describing this dude. Don't overdo it, but he definitely needs to sound more like a morally gray Texas oil baron.

Red feels like a stumble right as you're about to pass the finish line. The joke to me doesn't really land and just ends up feeling out of place. Not to mention you've also accidentally left out 'the' before 'sun'.

Validity: Good environmental beauty
Option 2a: "Don't you dare sign a deal with the devil," frantically warns your Minister of Skepticism, holding a magnifying glass up to the contract. "The second you sell out our gorgeous coastlines to be littered with pizza boxes, broken glass, and literal **** is the second you ruin this nation. If anything, WE should be offering to sell some of our junk to poorer nations. Nevermind the fact we can't afford it! Let them destroy their own environment, and say no to this contract — wait, is that brimstone?"

Something about Red just feels off to me as written. I think what you're going for is good, but just not quite right yet, y'know? I think maybe 'this devil' would work better, or maybe it needs to be an actual accusation that this contract is a deal with the devil. Not quite sure. Use your best judgment.

Blue is another joke that I think needs a bit more refining. Maybe something more like "- wait, does anybody else smell brimstone?" Another thing for you to consider before submitting.

Option 3a: "We could have it both ways, while simultaneously becoming even more profitable," suggests your Financial Minister, pulling you aside while the other two fight over the contents of the contract. "They're actually going to pay us for an opportunity to make a profit and provide jobs for thousands. Subsidize industries and loosen safety restrictions, and some insightful companies, which I have no personal stake in, will jump at the chance to give people work — cleaning up the garbage, recycling the good stuff, and selling it back to the United Federation for a profit. It's win-win, you can't lose!"

Gadzooks, Batman! Red is a sentence that is incredibly difficult to understand! Definitely try splitting this up into a couple of shorter and easier-to-understand sentences. As is, it's incredibly easy to get lost in it.

Blue is another redundancy. Use one or the other - not both.

Option 3b: "We could have it both ways, while simultaneously becoming even more profitable," suggests your Financial Minister, pulling you aside while the other two fight over the contents of the contract. "They're actually going to pay us for an opportunity to make a profit and provide more useful jobs for thousands. Reallocate some of our workforce to cleaning up the garbage, recycling the good stuff, and selling it back to the United Federation at a profit. It's win-win, you can't lose! So what if it means forgoing safety and public health?"'

The Red section specific to this variation is incredibly clumsy. It really looks like you just grafted it on right before posting this. Move it earlier on so it actually flows and makes logical sense in context.

Option 3c: "I don't think them giving us two gifts for the price of one counts as illegal international trading, right?" inquires your Financial Minister, pulling you aside while the other two fight over the contents of the contract. "Of course, it'd be nice if we could go one step further, i.e. sort out reusable material from the junk and sell it back to the United Federation for a profit. Actually, there'd be a lot of things we could make a profit on if we just abolished the ban on international trade; our economy's not doing so hot being self-reliant right now, anyways."

Red I think crosses that line where you're now openly disrespecting the player's choice. You're just saying "Autarky is garbage. Reverse it now?" without making it actually interesting.

Gonna leave the title, but I'm open to other title suggestions as well.

Trash Talk, and Taking Out The Trash are two ideas I had.

EDIT: Forgot Trash Talk is already an issue

[Socio Polor]

Just glancing over the draft, it looks good Jutsa. However, before I make any further comments or feedback on this, I have to ask something

Corporations from the highly capitalist and rabid consumerist nation of the United Federation has offered to pay your nation to take their trash off their hands.

Why exactly would a country (specifically a capitalist one) pay another country, to take their trash when they're usually organizations and agencies that deal with this stuff?

[Noahs Second Country]

Just glancing over the draft, it looks good Jutsa. However, before I make any further comments or feedback on this, I have to ask something

Corporations from the highly capitalist and rabid consumerist nation of the United Federation has offered to pay your nation to take their trash off their hands.

Why exactly would a country (specifically a capitalist one) pay another country, to take their trash when they're usually organizations and agencies that deal with this stuff?

There are a variety of reasons for this. Processing trash costs money, landfills cost space/resources, etc.. In comparison, exporting trash makes it another nation's problem and creates jobs for the nation buying the trash.

[Jutsa]

Alrighty, lets tackle this.

The phrase in blue seems redundant/unimportant to me. I don't think it actually matters what kind of nation UF is, just that corporations from UF are willing to pay for waste disposal.

Red is a grammatical error. 'Corporations' is the subject, not UF thus the verb needs to be pluralized to 'have'.

I'd still like to keep "rabid consumerist" just because a) it's mildly amusing, b) allude to something built into NS, and c) quite fitting for such a nation to hand over trash.
Still, capitalist isn't remotely important in this case.

@has: That was left over from when I just had it "United Federation" instead of "companies from the United Federation". Changed.

Is it really necessary to restrict this to nations with poor economies? It seems just as valid for nations with strong economies.

It actually crossed my mind too. I think that if nations have strong economies, then they're less likely to accept trash because they're producing more of it themselves.
Take China, for instance; they're actually a pretty rich economy that had taken loads of trash, but now that they're producing so much of their own, it's getting to the point where they can't take trash either.
I'll definitely open it from "poor" to "not powerhouse" economies, but I think there's still an upper limit on it; and on top of that, a lot of the draft is built around the perspective of a poorer nation, hence option 2 saying "nevermind the fact we can't afford it". I still think that could be a good set of logic for nations with good(and maybe even great) but not frightening economies, though, so I'll leave it in.

Natas seems a bit verbose to my taste

Fair, but I wanted to have a strong picture. Definitely upping his cowboy level in the narrative though, slipped my mind for some odd reason.
(I should know better after Pulling Out. smh)
also Mr. Natas is totally taken from Motherload, which I discovered because apparently that's where Ransium's name came from.

Red feels like a stumble right as you're about to pass the finish line.

Agreed. Was the last thing I added and by then it was like 1AM or something so I didn't give it much thought. Will remove.

Something about Red just feels off to me as written. I think what you're going for is good, but just not quite right yet, y'know? I think maybe 'this devil' would work better, or maybe it needs to be an actual accusation that this contract is a deal with the devil. Not quite sure. Use your best judgment.

I'll toy around with the wording a bit, also agree with you here. Kinda glad it's not totally wrong though, just needs work.

Blue is another joke that I think needs a bit more refining. Maybe something more like "- wait, does anybody else smell brimstone?" Another thing for you to consider before submitting.

He's looking at the contract with a magnifying glass. Unfortuantely, by the time the punchline to the narrative comes around, it's too late. I'll think something up, maybe make his dialogue a bit shorter or narrative come later (probably not the latter).

Gadzooks, Batman! Red is a sentence that is incredibly difficult to understand! Definitely try splitting this up into a couple of shorter and easier-to-understand sentences. As is, it's incredibly easy to get lost in it.

Blue is another redundancy. Use one or the other - not both.

Both are examples of both me in general and me when extremely tired. Will change.

The Red section specific to this variation is incredibly clumsy. It really looks like you just grafted it on right before posting this. Move it earlier on so it actually flows and makes logical sense in context.

that's because I did just graft it on, although admittedly it was a bit before posting. (Not much, I wrote this in like 10 minutes so like I'm not ashamed to admit this one was rushed and I didn't think to wait til morning to look it over.)

Red I think crosses that line where you're now openly disrespecting the player's choice. You're just saying "Autarky is garbage. Reverse it now?" without making it actually interesting.

You're right. I was again thinking in terms of how your nation's having a poor economy, but that really did cross the line. I'll definitely tone it down substantially, and maybe make it a totally different speaker, since it being your Financial minister is just adding insult to insult, and I in no way meant to do that. My apologies.

Taking Out The Trash

OK I do like that. Gonna just take that one if you don't mind.

Thank you so much for the feedback, Drasnia. It's actually really nice to have a draft torn open again; haven't had that in a good long while. And I do apologize for the late reply, I've just been terribly tired lately, quite possibly from the heat and oppressive, rainless fog.
Ngl, what energy I have I feel is best saved for when I can barely keep my eyes open open my eyes at the register. Alas, vast stretches of low stamina and high urge to be productive are a family trait.
Will work on this, hopefully later tonight, though I'm already tired just from replying to your comments.

[Australian rePublic]

How would a poor country have a good environment? Usually poor countries have terrible environments. The one and only exception to this is North Korea

[Honeydewistania]

How would a poor country have a good environment? Usually poor countries have terrible environments. The one and only exception to this is North Korea

Maybe they’re thinking of Polynesian islands or something where they aren’t rich but got beautiful lagoons or something.

[Jutsa]

And while not exactly irl, there also are certainly many nations within nationstates that are aggressively anti-establishment and pro-environment.

ed: Would be kinda awkward to not include them. Course, they need not a great environment; they just need not an absolute trash one.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

It's a good premise, but all those doppelganger options, its just too much.

Can you just write the issue in a way that doesn't require any doppelganger options?

[Jutsa]

Never.

Naeh I'll try it out. Will keep that in mind for my other draft with 9 options.

[Jutsa]

Consolidated, trimmed, accentified, debiasificated‚ reframed option 3, etc.

Also changed to Dirty Deals, though let me know if you prefer "Taking Out the Garbage" better.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

2.00 is pretty good.

I'd be tempted to ADD a fourth option where you not only say no, but you also actively discourage nations from exporting their garbage to other nations, including leading by example in your own nation, and threatening trade sanctions with those nations that do.

That'd be a suitable option for nations who actually care about the environment, but would be quite internationally aggressive, so wouldn't be a clear "right choice".

An effect line like "imported goods are never cheap rubbish" or similar could work for such an option.

[Trotterdam]

What's the difference between the first and third options? "Accept their garbage and dump it into landfills" versus "accept their garbage and recycle it"?

I'd be tempted to ADD a fourth option where you not only say no, but you also actively discourage nations from exporting their garbage to other nations, including leading by example in your own nation, and threatening trade sanctions with those nations that do.

It makes sense for your nation to make decisions about whether you export your garbage to other nations, or whether you let other nations export their garbage to you.

It would be pretty crazy for nation A to get aggressive about whether nation B is allowed to export garbage to nation C.

That'd be a suitable option for nations who actually care about the environment, but would be quite internationally aggressive, so wouldn't be a clear "right choice".

Though I get your point here. It feels like there should be some option for not exporting garbage in either direction.

Though speaking of caring about the environment, it occurs to me that in some circumstances agreeing to take other nations' garbage might in fact be the better choice. If you're going to properly recycle the imported garbage, whereas the originating nation would have just dumped it into a landfill if you refused, then that's a net benefit for the global environment - though probably still a relative loss for your own nation's environment. (This is probably not what's going to happen if the option mentions a "low low cost of massive deregulation", though.)

[Candlewhisper Archive]

It would be pretty crazy for nation A to get aggressive about whether nation B is allowed to export garbage to nation C.

I dunno, to me it seems like more people should be telling the USA off for its environmental irresponsibility, as even activities that don't directly involve our nations still impact the shared global environment.

[Jutsa]

Added option four.

[Fauxia]

Don’t we have the supplah (of space, basically) and they have the demayund? Considering we’re the ones making a profit.

[Jutsa]

Good point! Changed it around, added an "of space that iyus", and upgraded the last effect line (imo).

Gonna put this one on last call I think, lets any other major changes need be made.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

Cool. Not sure about effect line 4 though. I don't think it follows that trash would be valued, especially if removing any market value from it.

Maybe something like "people don't want any of that foreign rubbish"?

[Jutsa]

Cool. I don't think I've ever seen you say that, CWA... it's perhaps even stranger than seeing me say that.

Yes, I do much prefer that effect line though, thank you.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

Look, I'm "down with the kids". I'm hip. I'm happening.

*does a modern dance*

Ouch, I think something just happened to my hip.

[Honeydewistania]

Look, I'm "down with the kids". I'm hip. I'm happening.

*does a modern dance*

Ouch, I think something just happened to my hip.

Eyes have hips??? O.o

[Australian rePublic]

Good Luck