DESCRIPTION: Visiting head of state Winston Hillchurch was hit by a car and badly injured while trying to cross a busy road. He has blamed this accident on looking the wrong way, thanks to his own nation driving on the other side of the road.
OPTION 1 Mario F Cantaloupesano the driver, looks nervois and contrite. "Hey, I'm sorry I ran down the old man, but he just launched straight off the sidewalk in front of my car, you know? Hey, @@LEADER@@, maybe what we need is more proper road crossings, with lights, and writing on the road that tells you to 'LOOK LEFT' or 'LOOK RIGHT'. Stiff penalties for jaywalking too. I tell ya, my nerves can't take it when people leap out in the road like that."
OUTCOME: every district is a red light district in @@CAPITAL@@
OPTION 2 "Seems to me that all this could have been avoided if Hillchurch had been reminded to look both ways," interjects your Minister of Perception, stepping forward to be heard and colliding briefly with a passing aide who is striding past. "Maybe all visiting foreigners should be accompanied by official helpers, to keep them safe and supported at all times. They can make sure that people look the right way when crossing the road, and indeed, guide our visitors only to the nicest, most picturesque and most pro-government neighbourhoods."
OUTCOME: tourists visiting @@NAME@@ for their honeymoon complain about the government observer in the corner of the room
OPTION 3 "Foreign diplomacy is oft a catalogue of mishaps and blunders," intones the now-recovered Hillchurch, pouring tea for you and for the driver who hit him to show that he is apportioning no blame. "We have had accidents on the beaches, on the landing grounds, and in the fields and in the streets. We shall never surrender!" An aide whispers in the senile politician's ear. "Ah sorry, where was I? Ah yes -- I would suggest that a civilised nation of civilised people should perhaps consider changing the side of the road on which they drive their cars. This is your duty, your only safe course."
OUTCOME: people are getting used to the government telling them to look the other way
OPTION 4 "Do you have any idea how expensive these ideas would be?" asks a constipated looking libertarian, who has been working it out with a pencil. "Fundamentally, big government is a pain in the ass! Why waste taxpayer money just because some foreign bigwig is accident prone? If anything, we should be spending less on telling people where they can and can't walk, and trusting people to look after their own safety."
OUTCOME: the most common roadkill is coiled rattlesnake
DRAFT 1:
TITLE: Crossing Over
VALIDITY: cars
DESCRIPTION: Visiting head of state Winston Hillchurch was hit by a car and badly injured while trying to cross a busy road. He has blamed this accident on looking the wrong way, thanks to his own nation driving on the other side of the road.
OPTION 1 "Foreign diplomacy is oft a catalogue of mishaps and blunders," intones the now-recovered Hillchurch, pouring tea for you and for the driver who hit him to show that he is apportioning no blame. "We have had accidents on the beaches, on the landing grounds, and in the fields and in the streets. We shall never surrender!" An aide whispers in the senile politician's ear. "Ah sorry, where was I? Ah yes -- I would suggest that a civilised nation of civilised people should perhaps consider changing the side of the road on which they drive their cars. This is your duty, your only safe course."
OUTCOME: people are getting used to the government telling them to look the other way
OPTION 2 Mario F Cantaloupesano the driver, nervously disagrees. "Hey, I'm sorry I ran you down pal, you just launched straight off the sidewalk in front of my car, you know? Hey, @@LEADER@@, maybe what we need is more proper road crossings, with lights. Stiff penalties for jaywalking too. I tell ya, my nerves can't take it when people leap out in the road like that."
OUTCOME: every district is a red light district in @@CAPITAL@@
OPTION 3 "Seems to me that all this could have been avoided if Hillchurch looked both ways," interjects your Minister of Education, stepping forward to be heard and colliding briefly with a passing aide who is striding past. "Maybe the lesson here is to make sure that our own people remember this basic lesson, and get well-funded mandatory road crossing safety lessons at an early age. Stop, look, LISTEN TO ME! Actually, that's all I had to say. Carry on!"
OUTCOME: high-vis neon yellow jackets are fashionable amongst the nation's teens MANDATORY NUDITY NATION'S OUTCOME: high-vis neon tellow bodypaint is fashionable amongst the nation's teens
OPTION 4 "Do you have any idea how expensive these ideas would be?" asks a constipated looking libertarian, who has been working it out with a pencil. "Fundamentally, big government is a pain in the ass! Why waste taxpayer money just because some foreign bigwig is accident prone? If anything, we should be spending less on telling people where they can and can't walk, and trusting people to look after their own safety."
OUTCOME: the most common roadkill is coiled rattlesnake
Posted: Fri Jan 10, 2020 4:44 am
by Australian rePublic
Stealing my idea I see. Oh well, if you can perfect it, go for it. If a highly ranked official would make this mistake, then lots of foreigners would make this mistake, so I would suggest saying that
Posted: Fri Jan 10, 2020 4:57 am
by Candlewhisper Archive
Australian rePublic wrote:Stealing my idea I see. Oh well, if you can perfect it, go for it. If a highly ranked official would make this mistake, then lots of foreigners would make this mistake, so I would suggest saying that
That's a hefty accusation, Aussie.
No, I'm not stealing your idea. Yours is about switching sides on the road with the Channel Tunnel crossing. This one is about road crossing safety, and the side of the road thing only comes from the historical context that Churchill gave, and only applies to the crazy first option.
I'd be happy for your issue to coexist alongside my one without overlap, dependent of course on the submission success of the respective issues.
Posted: Fri Jan 10, 2020 5:01 am
by Trotterdam
The first option seems silly. No matter what side you drive on, there will always be some countries that drive on the other side. Unless there is one particular country that for some reason it's especially important for you to get along with, the smart thing to do is to drive on the same side as the majority of countries in the world, because that minimizes the probability of accidents, not to switch sides every time an accident happens.
The third option, though somewhat sensible, is also missing the point. Educating our own citizens won't be helping prevent foreign visitors from getting into accidents.
For my part I can generally hear cars coming. I know where to look because I already know the car is there and just need to check exactly how far away. ("Improvements" in engine technology - electric cars? - making cars quiet enough to throw off people used to their previous noise level would be an interesting issue.)
Australian rePublic wrote:Stealing my idea I see. Oh well, if you can perfect it, go for it. If a highly ranked official would make this mistake, then lots of foreigners would make this mistake, so I would suggest saying that
That's a hefty accusation, Aussie.
No, I'm not stealing your idea. Yours is about switching sides on the road with the Channel Tunnel crossing. This one is about road crossing safety, and the side of the road thing only comes from the historical context that Churchill gave, and only applies to the crazy first option.
I'd be happy for your issue to coexist alongside my one without overlap, dependent of course on the submission success of the respective issues.
That post was in jest. I'm enjoying this issue
Posted: Fri Jan 10, 2020 6:24 am
by Lelscrep
Trotterdam wrote:The first option seems silly. No matter what side you drive on, there will always be some countries that drive on the other side. Unless there is one particular country that for some reason it's especially important for you to get along with, the smart thing to do is to drive on the same side as the majority of countries in the world, because that minimizes the probability of accidents, not to switch sides every time an accident happens.
The third option, though somewhat sensible, is also missing the point. Educating our own citizens won't be helping prevent foreign visitors from getting into accidents.
For my part I can generally hear cars coming. I know where to look because I already know the car is there and just need to check exactly how far away. ("Improvements" in engine technology - electric cars? - making cars quiet enough to throw off people used to their previous noise level would be an interesting issue.)
I agree with point three, possibly have it be more around educating foreigners how to cross the road upon their arrival to the nation.
Also, high quality poop jokes in the fourth option, keep it up.
Posted: Fri Jan 10, 2020 10:30 am
by Candlewhisper Archive
I know crazy options go at the end normally, rather than in the option 1 position, but it seemed odd not to open with Churchill. I may try to rearrange though to see if I can put that at the end.
Option 3 , that's a fair point. Will look to make it about educating visitors.
Posted: Fri Jan 10, 2020 2:25 pm
by Australian rePublic
Having travelled overseas with my family, we've made that mistake. Having extreme numbers of tourists from Australia and Japan (both of which drive on the left), and on account of being part of the United States of America (which drives on the right) all over Oahu in Hawaii, there are markings at crossings reminding people to look left
Ah, here we go
They can also help with one way streets
I think this might be a little excessive
Posted: Fri Jan 10, 2020 4:30 pm
by Socio Polor
Mario F Cantaloupesano the driver, nervously disagrees.
I feel there should be a comma after the driver's name.
OPTION 3 "Seems to me that all this could have been avoided if Hillchurch looked both ways," interjects your Minister of Education, stepping forward to be heard and colliding briefly with a passing aide who is striding past. "Maybe the lesson here is to make sure that our own people remember this basic lesson, and get well-funded mandatory road crossing safety lessons at an early age. Stop, look, LISTEN TO ME! Actually, that's all I had to say. Carry on!"
I agree with Trotter, This option doesn't really solve the dilemma at hand, educating foreigners would be better
Good Luck, CWA!
Posted: Sat Jan 11, 2020 4:34 am
by Australian rePublic
Everybody look left Everybody look right Everywhere you look I'm standing in the spotlight!
(Not yet!)
Let every creature go for broke and sing Let's hear it in the herd and on the wing It's gonna be King Simba's finest fling
Oh, I just can't wait to be king! [hr]
I'll see myself out
Posted: Sat Jan 11, 2020 2:56 pm
by Candlewhisper Archive
Australian rePublic wrote:Everybody look left Everybody look right Everywhere you look I'm standing in the spotlight!
(Not yet!)
Let every creature go for broke and sing Let's hear it in the herd and on the wing It's gonna be King Simba's finest fling
Oh, I just can't wait to be king! [hr]
I'll see myself out
If this is where the thread is headed Count me out Out of service, out of Nationstates I wouldn't hang about
Posted: Fri Jan 10, 2020 3:53 am
