NationStates

Desc: This morning, you were gathered in heat as a local newspaper mocked you in a political cartoon. The cartoon depicted you as @@A@@ @@ANIMAL@@ staggering around, in reference to a moment last Tuesday when you hurt your leg at a summit.


Option 1: "What is going on in this thing?" says @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Defense of the Leader's Opinion, as he holds up a big sign that reads '@@LEADER@@ is not @@A@@ @@ANIMAL@@!' "We need to arrest whoever these people are before they can even say, 'that's our opinion'. Well... I know it takes a bit to say that, but still! Newspapers must be state-controlled and approved multiple times before they can be published."

Fallout 1: the press always suspiciously praises @@LEADER@@ every Sunday

Adds Policy: State Press


Option 2: "Hey, we can say what we want!," argues the publisher, @@RANDOMNAME@@. "This is a very accurate cartoon right here. Have you ever seen one of those @@ANIMALPLURAL@@ when they get hurt? It looks exactly like @@LEADER@@. I say we put this everywhere, you know? Make it open to people in other countries, too."

Fallout 2: foreign political cartoons often portray @@LEADER@@ losing a leg.


Option 3: After everything calms down, a tomato flies by @@HIS@@ head. "@@LEADER@@, we respect you!," shouts a protester from outside. "Not like those losers that control the paper! That 'cartoon' is wrong and should be banned! You should give the press to the people! Kick the disrespectful publishers out of their positions!" Finally, a police officer pushes them away.

Fallout 3: the top news story today is that @@RANDOMFIRSTNAME@@'s front yard is being redone


Option 4a: "I've got a crazy idea," says your Minister of Crazy Ideas, @@RANDOMNAME@@. "What if we got rid of the newspaper? It's hard to find paper in this part of the country, and it's expensive to import it. Plus, it takes too much time to print. It's just too big! How about, we get rid of this thing altogether and just move on."

Effect 4a: The older people of the country are starting to ask where all their articles have gone

Validity: Must have low levels of Environmental Beauty


Option 4b: "I've got a crazy idea," says your Minister of Crazy Ideas, @@RANDOMNAME@@. "What if we got rid of the newspaper? It's hard to find ink in this part of the country, and it's expensive to import it. Plus, it takes too much time to print. It's just too big! How about, we get rid of this thing altogether and just move on."

Effect 4b: Effect 4a: The older people of the country are starting to ask where all their articles have gone

Validity: Must have high levels of Environmental Beauty

But did @@LEADER@@ smash into a pole?

The writing in this is so very clunky...

Don't say that @@LEADER@@ does anything. The player is @@LEADER@@.

This issue seems like to overlap rather too heavily with #39 and #178.

There's a potential unique angle here though, about political cartoons.

I suggest focusing specifically on that aspect, and sharpening the writing generally to make it sound more literate.

A common error of issue writers is to adopt the "four year old telling a story" mode, which basically goes something like this:

Tommy pushed Susie. Then Susie kicked him. And then he hit Susie on the head. With a stick. It really hurt. Susie is sad now. That's why Susie is crying:

Whereas it should be more like...

This morning, an escalating altercation between schoolchildren Tommy and Susie ended in tears...

So basically restructure your thoughts, refocus the issue on political cartoons, and frame the responses to the dilemma on that premise.

Keep writing though -- you've got ideas, enthusiasm and potential, and that can take you a long way.

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:There's a potential unique angle here though, about political cartoons.

There's also an angle of Lèse-majesté laws.

Aclion wrote:

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:There's a potential unique angle here though, about political cartoons.

There's also an angle of Lèse-majesté laws.

That could work, but probably only for monarchy nations for it to feel unique.

Why would this be invalid for monarchies? This sort of thing could happen to any leader.

Chan Island wrote:Why would this be invalid for monarchies? This sort of thing could happen to any leader.

Well it originally had a chief of staff, which I thought was out of place with monarchies...

...anyway, edited.

Chan Island wrote:Why would this be invalid for monarchies? This sort of thing could happen to any leader.

I meant specifically lèse-majesté, rather than political cartoons. For lèse-majesté to apply conceptually you need to have some idea that the leader is special or sacred in some way, which normally means absolute monarchy, though I guess modern autocratic states often hold their leaders in official reverence as well.

There's no monarchy limitation needed on an issue about political cartoons, only on one about lèse-majesté.

What do you guys think about the results?

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:

Aclion wrote:There's also an angle of Lèse-majesté laws.

That could work, but probably only for monarchy nations for it to feel unique.

Doesn't need to be. Some protect all government officials or even the government in abstract.
This is touched on, but barely in 613.

Nooooooooooooooo wrote:Tensions rise as last week, your vehicle crashed into a light post

Change "rise" to "rose", it needs to be past simple.
Also, I believe "light post" is wrong. "Street light" is what you need.

I think option 1 needs a bit more to it. The speaker should ask for state control of newspapers, or at least have a government official approve stories / cartoons before publication.

Option 2, how or why is it accurate? A bit more evidence please.

Nooooooooooooooo wrote:overthrow the newspaper!

I think this bit is unneccassary, it sounds like state control, but you're asking for citizen control.

Baggieland wrote:

Nooooooooooooooo wrote:Tensions rise as last week, your vehicle crashed into a light post

Change "rise" to "rose", it needs to be past simple.
Also, I believe "light post" is wrong. "Street light" is what you need.

I think option 1 needs a bit more to it. The speaker should ask for state control of newspapers, or at least have a government official approve stories / cartoons before publication.

Option 2, how or why is it accurate? A bit more evidence please.

Nooooooooooooooo wrote:overthrow the newspaper!

I think this bit is unneccassary, it sounds like state control, but you're asking for citizen control.

Edited.

Right now, I'd get no further than the opening description before rejecting this one.

Desc: Tensions rose as last week, your vehicle crashed into a street light. Luckily nobody was hurt, but unfortunately, a certain newspaper article mocked this in a political cartoon and depicted you as a car crashing into a post. Supposedly, it was to say that you aren't smart. Critics of the paper and fans of yours have gathered together to protest the publication.

I refer you to my first post in this thread -- try to make it flow better.

So are you guys okay with me submitting it?

For sure, go ahead. Deleting takes no time at all, really.

Nevermind...

If the description is edited a bit, then I think it'd be good to publish.

So I've cleaned up a few things within the description and the options.

Also, what do you guys think about the new option?

Did @@LEADER@@ smash into the pole? Yes or no?

Desc: This morning, you were gathered in heat as a local newspaper mocked you in a political cartoon. The cartoon depicted you as a car crashing into a street light, in reference to an incident that happened last Thursday, after your vehicle scratched into a post.

I think for this issue to work, there needs to be a sharper political cartoonist, as satirising your car accident by depicting you as a car having an accident is pretty weaksauce.

I'd suggest that you change the cartoon to something that references real life controversies. Maybe reference the Winnie the Pooh / Xi Jinping thing, and have a disrespectful meme proliferating because of it.

Australian rePublic wrote:Did @@LEADER@@ smash into the pole? Yes or no?

The way I said it made it sound like @@LEADER@@ didn't, but I was trying to say that the cartoonist exaggerated it, like he/she was from the opposite party or something. So I guess no, the paint just was scratched.

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:

Desc: This morning, you were gathered in heat as a local newspaper mocked you in a political cartoon. The cartoon depicted you as a car crashing into a street light, in reference to an incident that happened last Thursday, after your vehicle scratched into a post.

I think for this issue to work, there needs to be a sharper political cartoonist, as satirising your car accident by depicting you as a car having an accident is pretty weaksauce.

I'd suggest that you change the cartoon to something that references real life controversies. Maybe reference the Winnie the Pooh / Xi Jinping thing, and have a disrespectful meme proliferating because of it.

Alright, I'll make the cartoonist depict @@LEADER@@ as a famous character, or maybe as an @@ANIMAL@@?

the Winnie the Pooh / Xi Jinping thing,

Am I missing something? I don't really know what you're talking about here. Anyway, I'll see what i can do.


Although, this might fall too close to 'The @@LEADER@@ Meme'.

Nooooooooooooooo wrote:

Australian rePublic wrote:Did @@LEADER@@ smash into the pole? Yes or no?

The way I said it made it sound like @@LEADER@@ didn't, but I was trying to say that the cartoonist exaggerated it, like he/she was from the opposite party or something. So I guess no, the paint just was scratched.

Candlewhisper Archive wrote:
I think for this issue to work, there needs to be a sharper political cartoonist, as satirising your car accident by depicting you as a car having an accident is pretty weaksauce.

I'd suggest that you change the cartoon to something that references real life controversies. Maybe reference the Winnie the Pooh / Xi Jinping thing, and have a disrespectful meme proliferating because of it.

Alright, I'll make the cartoonist depict @@LEADER@@ as a famous character, or maybe as an @@ANIMAL@@?

the Winnie the Pooh / Xi Jinping thing,

Am I missing something? I don't really know what you're talking about here. Anyway, I'll see what i can do.


Although, this might fall too close to 'The @@LEADER@@ Meme'.

On the left we have Xi Jinping, China (PRC)'s president. On the right we have, Winnie the Pooh, a cartoon bear. Xi Jinping banned Winnie the Pooh from China. Can you guess the reason why? Is it because Winnie the Pooh is inappropriate? No, it's a children's show. Is it because Winnie the Pooh is pantsless? No, no, it's not?

So why did China ban Winnie the Pooh? For the sole reason that people say that President Xi looks like Winnie the Pooh, and President Xi sensative about it. Yes, you read that right, one of the world's most powerful dictators, who rules over 1.2 billion people with an iron fist, is offended by the fact that he looks like a cartoon bear.

Naturally, this has caused those of us who don't live under his reign of terror to make fun of him even more because of it, ahd teasing such a brutal dictator is indeed a noble cause