Draft 3:
[name] Mott's Tots
[description] A few years ago during a speech at the opening of a new preparatory school servicing @@CAPITAL@@'s most disadvantaged neighborhood, Education Minister Rachael Mott made an off-handed remark implying that the government might reward the entire inaugural class with full ride scholarships to their colleges of choice. Unfortunately, she was only reminded of this comment today upon receiving an invitation to the upcoming graduation ceremony, replete with personal stories from many gracious students and families.
[option] "My department just doesn't have the funding to fulfill such a large payment," sobs your Education Minister, blowing her nose in a tissue. "I have to own up to my mistake; those students spent years anticipating promised scholarships. There has to be another way to reroute some extra @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ to fix this. Isn't their some other department that could take a temporary hit for this cause-- perhaps the military, for once?"
[effect] textbook preorders are paid for in blood money
[option] "I wholeheartedly reject any effort to weaken the troops!" barks General @@RANDOMNAME@@, writing your name down on a clipboard for insubordination. "Lest anyone accuse me of being unsympathetic, I propose a different plan of attack! Provided the students sign up for a branch of the armed forces, my office will gladly help pay for their subsequent education. In fact, I think this should be a policy for anyone with the will to serve. This shall bolster our ranks, instill discipline in the next generation, and provide an anchor for many an educational opportunity! I don't see a downside!"
[effect] military caskets are often draped with the fallen soldier's masters thesis
[option] "Have you considered a meritocratic approach?" inquires your brother, reviewing a pile of expenditure reports. "The education budget isn't completely strained, although full rides for everyone are still obviously out of the question. I think it's sensible to reward the highest-performing students first, then provide diminishing returns to those with less stellar cumulative grades. It may be seen as a betrayal to some of the students, but let's face it -- if there's a straight-F pupil, it's not like throwing money at them is going to magically fix their habits at University."
[effect] education is prioritised for those who need it the least
[option] "It's time to go further!" shouts student activist @@RANDOMNAME@@, waving a picket sign outside of your office. "This isn't a mistake, but the beginning of a revolution! Instead of only focusing on one school, @@NAME@@ should commit to providing a Universal College Education for all students! While a hefty tax increase will be needed to finance such a system, it's a small price to pay for ensuring what should be considered an inalienable human right!"
[effect] cleaners are more likely to hold a degree in Sanitation Management than a mop
