(DRAFT) A bloodless calculation
Posted: Mon Apr 22, 2019 6:18 pm
Johnny Elton is complaining on various media that he was refused the opportunity to donate blood because he is homosexual.
(option) "It's neither fair nor reasonable. I volunteered to donate blood and was made to fill out a long form asking a lot of embarrassing questions, after which they sent me home, telling me I was 'a high risk category'. But I'm not a category! I'm an individual, and I want to be treated as one. I've been healthy my entire life. Please let me make my humble contribution to society by donating blood."
(effect) The problem of blood shortages has been solved, as there are ever more donors and a ever fewer people seeking transfusions.
(option) "I regret Mr Elton's hurt feelings", begins Tom Mice, your Minister of Public Health, " but the truth is that gay men are more than 40 times as likely as their hetero counterparts to be carrying VODAIS. VODAIDS is an incurable, fatal disease carried by blood. And it is impossible to detect during the incubation phase.
(effect) People feel wholly justified in holding their prejudices, now that they have been endorsed by respected institutions on "scientific grounds".
(option) "Johnny Elton is right!" interjects civil rights crusader, Martin Luther Gandhi during a rally of his organisation 'Reprieve International'. "If we begin excluding people based on categories, where do we stop?" . "Why not refuse housing to Maxtopian families because people say they like loud parties, or refuse to hire Brancalandians because they are said to be lazy. I insist that blood banks be made to accept all volunteers; drug addicts, homeless people, lepers, llamas, and anyone with a sexually transmitted diseases or bad breath, unless the blood bank can demonstrate beyond any doubt that their blood is certain to be toxic."
(effect) People bleed to death, rather than playing Maxtopian roulette at the local blood bank.
(option) "It's neither fair nor reasonable. I volunteered to donate blood and was made to fill out a long form asking a lot of embarrassing questions, after which they sent me home, telling me I was 'a high risk category'. But I'm not a category! I'm an individual, and I want to be treated as one. I've been healthy my entire life. Please let me make my humble contribution to society by donating blood."
(effect) The problem of blood shortages has been solved, as there are ever more donors and a ever fewer people seeking transfusions.
(option) "I regret Mr Elton's hurt feelings", begins Tom Mice, your Minister of Public Health, " but the truth is that gay men are more than 40 times as likely as their hetero counterparts to be carrying VODAIS. VODAIDS is an incurable, fatal disease carried by blood. And it is impossible to detect during the incubation phase.
(effect) People feel wholly justified in holding their prejudices, now that they have been endorsed by respected institutions on "scientific grounds".
(option) "Johnny Elton is right!" interjects civil rights crusader, Martin Luther Gandhi during a rally of his organisation 'Reprieve International'. "If we begin excluding people based on categories, where do we stop?" . "Why not refuse housing to Maxtopian families because people say they like loud parties, or refuse to hire Brancalandians because they are said to be lazy. I insist that blood banks be made to accept all volunteers; drug addicts, homeless people, lepers, llamas, and anyone with a sexually transmitted diseases or bad breath, unless the blood bank can demonstrate beyond any doubt that their blood is certain to be toxic."
(effect) People bleed to death, rather than playing Maxtopian roulette at the local blood bank.