[ACCEPTED] - Meet Your (Meth) Maker

[Candensia]

Hello GI colleagues, my latest offering is ready for peer-review. Your comments are appreciated, as always.

First Draft

[DRAFT] - Meet Your (Meth) Maker/b]

[b][The Issue] - As @@NAME@@ continues to grapple with methamphetamine and its cooks, law enforcement officials have suggested limiting access to meth precursor chemicals, such as pseudoephedrine, a common nasal decongestant sold in pharmacies across the country.

[issuevalidity] - Follow-up to #1016. Must have selected 1016.1, 1016.2, or 1016.4


[Option 1] - "It's unfortunate that the national drug problem has even infiltrated our pharmacies," laments @@ANIMAL@@ City police commissioner @@RANDOMNAME@@. "Cracking the meth crisis starts with making things harder for meth cooks, and that means restricting the sale of meth precursors like pseudoephedrine. By limiting the amount of this drug citizens can buy, we can put the brakes on meth-makers, who require it in bulk to maintain their deadly production. Buyers should also have valid identification and posses good reason to acquire the drug, and any citizen with good intentions will be able to provide both to their pharmacist."

[effect] - costume stores do suspiciously well when built adjacent to a pharmacy


[Option 2] - "Limits are good, but not nearly good enough," remarks @@RANDOMNAME@@, an anti-drug activist. "In order to stop the spread of meth in our society, there must be even stricter regulations in place regarding the sale of chemicals directly involved in its manufacture. If it were up to me, anyone looking to purchase pseudoephedrine or similar precursors in @@NAME@@ would need to posses a valid prescription from a licensed doctor. Such methods are worth the trouble, after all, drugs kill people!"

[effect] - the underground allergy relief market blooms in winter


[Option 3] - "Restricting pseudoephedrine sales only hurts responsible, law-abiding drug users!" exclaims Medical Rights Association spokesperson @@RANDOMNAME@@. "In the end, criminals are going to get the drug illegally, so restrictions or limits of any kind will be in vain. Rather than targeting law-abiding citizens, the government should establish harsher, deterring penalties for those actually involved in meth trafficking, cooking, and dealing. If someone is willing to corrupt @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ communities, then they ought to spend the rest of their life reflecting on it."

[effect] - being caught with a speck of meth is met with mandatory life imprisonment

Second Draft

[DRAFT] - Meet Your (Meth) Maker

[The Issue] - As @@NAME@@ continues to grapple with methamfetaimne and its cooks, law enforcement officials have suggested limiting access to meth precursor chemicals, such as pseudoephedrine, a common nasal decongestant sold in pharmacies across the country.

[issuevalidity] - Follow-up to #1016. Must have selected 1016.1, 1016.2, or 1016.4


[Option 1] - "It's unfortunate that the national drug problem has even infiltrated our pharmacies," laments @@ANIMAL@@ City police commissioner @@RANDOMNAME@@. "Cracking the meth crisis starts with making things harder for meth cooks, and that means restricting the sale of meth precursors like pseudoephedrine. By limiting the amount of this drug citizens can buy, we can put the brakes on meth-makers, who require it in bulk to maintain their deadly production. Such limits are truly reasonable, unless you happen to be a pack-a-day pill-popper, in which case you probably have bigger problems."

[effect] - costume stores do suspiciously well when built adjacent to a pharmacy


[Option 2] - "And it's not like there are any real reasons to buy pseudo anyway," sniffles @@RANDOMNAME@@, a cold-stricken anti-drug activist. "Limits are good, but not nearly good enough. It’s still too easy for clandestine chemists to get their hands on precursors, as they can still just buy them from their local pharmacy as if it were a 24-hour meth minimart. The solution, like forms of meth itself, is crystal clear: anyone looking to purchase pseudoephedrine or similar precursors in @@NAME@@ needs to posses a valid prescription from a licensed doctor. This level of control is worth the trouble, after all, drugs kill peopl- achoo!"

[effect] - the underground allergy relief market blooms in winter


[Option 3] - "Restricting pseudoephedrine sales only hurts responsible, law-abiding drug users!" exclaims Medical Rights Association spokesperson @@RANDOMNAME@@. "In the end, criminals are going to get the drug illegally, so restrictions or limits of any kind will be in vain. Rather than targeting law-abiding citizens, the government should establish harsher, deterring penalties for those actually involved in meth trafficking, cooking, and dealing. Meth morons are willing to corrupt @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ society, and @@NAME@@ needs to remove them from it permanently."

[effect] - being caught with a speck of meth is met with mandatory life imprisonment

Third Draft

[DRAFT] - Meet Your (Meth) Maker

[The Issue] - With methamphetamine still on (and in) the minds of many @@DEMONYMNOUNPLURAL@@, law enforcement officials have suggested limiting access to meth precursor chemicals, such as pseudoephedrine, a common nasal decongestant sold in pharmacies across the country.

[issuevalidity] - Follow-up to #1016. Must have selected 1016.1, 1016.2, or 1016.4


[Option 1] - "It's unfortunate that the national drug problem has even infiltrated our pharmacies," laments @@ANIMAL@@ City police commissioner @@RANDOMNAME@@. "Cracking the meth crisis starts with making things harder for meth cooks, and that means restricting the sale of meth precursors like pseudoephedrine. By limiting the amount of this drug citizens can buy, we can put the brakes on meth-makers, who require it in bulk to maintain their deadly production. Such limits are truly reasonable, unless you happen to be a pack-a-day pill-popper, in which case you probably have bigger problems."

[effect] - costume stores do suspiciously well when built adjacent to a pharmacy


[Option 2] - "And it's not like there are any real reasons to buy pseudo anyway," sniffles @@RANDOMNAME@@, a cold-stricken anti-drug activist. "Limits are good, but not nearly good enough. It’s still too easy for clandestine chemists to get their hands on precursors, as they can still just buy them from their local pharmacy as if it were a 24-hour meth minimart. The solution, like forms of meth itself, is crystal clear: anyone looking to purchase pseudoephedrine or similar precursors in @@NAME@@ needs to posses a valid prescription from a licensed doctor. This level of control is worth the trouble, after all, drugs kill peopl- achoo!"

[effect] - the underground allergy relief market blooms in winter


[Option 3] - "Restricting pseudoephedrine sales only hurts responsible, law-abiding drug users!" exclaims Medical Rights Association spokesperson @@RANDOMNAME@@. "I'm no criminal, I just buy my meds by the metric ton, and the government has no right to interfere! Rather than targeting law-abiding citizens, @@NAME@@ should establish even harsher, deterring penalties for those actually involved in the illegal drug trade. Meth morons are willing to corrupt @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ society after all, and so I hope they get addicted to the sweet taste of justice."

[effect] - drug raids and rock candy confiscations have increased exponentially

Current Draft

[DRAFT] - Meet Your (Meth) Maker SUBMITTED 11/26/18

[The Issue] - With methamphetamine still on (and in) the minds of many @@DEMONYMNOUNPLURAL@@, law enforcement officials have suggested limiting access to meth precursor chemicals, such as pseudoephedrine, a common nasal decongestant sold in pharmacies across the country.

[issuevalidity] - Follow-up to #1016. Must have selected 1016.1, 1016.2, or 1016.4


[Option 1] - "Drugstores are being taken advantage of, and what darn shame it is," laments rural sheriff @@RANDOMNAME@@. "If we're gonna stop this methampheta-meltdown, we need'a restrict the sale of meth precursors. Doing so will stomp the brakes on meth makers, who require em in bulk to keep up their deadly production. A reasonable monthly limit ain't gonna harm nobody, unless you're a pack-a-day pill-popper, and then you have bigger problems anyway."

[effect] - costume stores do suspiciously well when built adjacent to a pharmacy


[Option 2] - "And it's not like there are any real reasons to buy pseudo in the first place," sniffles @@RANDOMNAME@@, a cold-stricken anti-drug activist. "Limits are good, but not nearly good enough. It’s still too easy for clandestine chemists to get their hands on precursors, as they can still just buy them from their local pharmacy as if it were a 24-hour meth minimart. The solution, like forms of meth itself, is crystal clear: anyone looking to purchase pseudoephedrine or similar precursors in @@NAME@@ needs to posses a valid prescription from a licensed doctor. This level of control is worth the trouble, after all, drugs kill peopl- achoo!"

[effect] - the underground allergy relief market blooms in winter


[optionvalidity] - capitalist
[Option 3A] - "Restricting pseudoephedrine sales only hurts responsible, law-abiding drug users!" passionately exclaims Medical Rights Association spokesperson @@RANDOMNAME@@. "I'm no criminal, I just buy my meds by the metric ton, and I should continue to be allowed to do so! Anyway, this is something drug companies are better equipped to solve...with state support. Some government @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ would go a long way towards developing safer drugs that can't be used by meth cooks. Oh, and maybe we can send some chill pills to those drug-control loonies too."

[effect] - drug abuse is combated through drug use


[optionvalidity] - communist
[Option 3B] - "Restricting pseudoephedrine sales only hurts responsible, law-abiding drug users!" passionately exclaims Medical Rights Association spokesperson @@RANDOMNAME@@. "I'm no criminal, I just buy my meds by the metric ton, and I should continue to be allowed to do so! Anyway, this is something drug makers are equipped to solve, if the government prioritizes it. Additional @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ would go a long way towards developing safer drugs that can't be used by meth cooks. Oh, and maybe we can send some chill pills to those drug-control loonies too."

[effect] - drug abuse is combated through drug use

[Australian rePublic]

Isn't it impossible to flip that chemical?

[Candensia]

I did some hotfixes. The order of options 2 and 3 have been swapped, and both options have been tweaked to accommodate this. I believe the narrative flows a bit better because of this.

I've also swapped the title out for something I think works better. (although I'm going to keep twisting it around)

[Hediacrana]

Each of the options currently uses fairly formal language. I think it might be a good idea to have the speakers use more distinct idioms from each other.

[Sacara]

This is solidly written, Candensia, but there really is no humor to the issue itself. This feels like I'm reading a report, not a funny NS issue.

I also think you could do better with the title.

[Candensia]

Draft two is out!

I've reworded options one and two, they should be a bit more humorous.
I have not yet changed the title, but suggestions are appreciated.

Thank you for your continued feedback.

[Jutsa]

Got Meth?

[Candensia]

Got Meth?

Suggestion noted. I’ll keep thinking.


I’ve spruced up option two some more. Never thought I’d refer to a pharmacy as a “24-hour meth mini-mart”, but here we are.

[Jutsa]

Never thought I’d refer to a pharmacy as a “24-hour meth mini-mart”, but here we are.

Yeah, that tends to happen in GI.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

Great issue idea and good writing but:

Each of the options currently uses fairly formal language. I think it might be a good idea to have the speakers use more distinct idioms from each other.

This, very much this. Likewise the opening seems a bit dry and technical. Can you punch it up a bit?

[Candensia]

Draft three is out, here are some key changes.

Title has been changed to "Meet Your (Meth) Maker. (Tell me if those parenthesis should be removed or not)

The description has been edited slightly for enhanced satire.

Option 3 has been reworded to increase humor and to highlight differences in character.

Effect 3 has been redone.

Thank you for the continued feedback.

[Candensia]

Additionally, I’m starting to feel as if Option 3 would work IF this issue was intended as a standalone issue, rather than one that chains off #1016.

Should I tweak the option so that it doesn’t sound like a broken record of #1016.1?

[Candensia]

Okay. Fourth draft out.

Here are some key changes.

Option 3 has been significantly reworked.

Option 3A is a variant for capitalist nations, 3B for communist nations.

Hopefully, the draft now avoids sounding repetitive in the wake of #1016.

[Hediacrana]

I really like the current form, and I think it's a great issue, but I still think it would be good to vary the language used by some of the speakers a little. They all sound like well-informed, well-educated citizens with a good number of Greek- and Latin-derived terms in their vocabulary. Could you see changing one or more of hem into people with a slightly more slangy, working-class type sociolect?

[Candensia]

I really like the current form, and I think it's a great issue, but I still think it would be good to vary the language used by some of the speakers a little. They all sound like well-informed, well-educated citizens with a good number of Greek- and Latin-derived terms in their vocabulary. Could you see changing one or more of hem into people with a slightly more slangy, working-class type sociolect?

Yes, I see exactly what you're saying, and it is a great idea. It's just surprisingly difficult for me, I feel as if the argument sounds inauthentic.

My privileged upbringing and college education is not helping me here.

Option 1 has been reworded.

[Candensia]

I've tweaked option one to promote some variety in dialect. How're we looking now?

[Candensia]

If there aren't any loose ends to tie up, I'll be sending this one to meet its maker (or rather to await its fate) in the coming days.

Last call.

[Candensia]

And submitted.

Your feedback was invaluable, everyone. Thank you.

[Jutsa]

Good luck, Candensia! I'm sure it's a keeper, though.

[Bears Armed]

Good luck!