First Draft
Current Draft
[DRAFT] - Side Effects SUBMITTED 11/18/2018
[The Issue] - @@ANIMAL@@ Pharmaceuticals, a major international drug company based in @@NAME@@, was recently linked to illegal human experimentation and organ harvesting operations occurring in the underdeveloped, jungle nation of Kawandaland. Its atrocities exposed, the company has gone bottom-up, throwing @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ markets into turmoil, and largely eliminating access to inexpensive medical supplies in Kawandaland.
[issuevalidity] - High black market, capitalist, below average economy or worse.
[Option 1] - "@@ANIMAL@@ Pharmaceuticals was both dealing diphenhydramine and defiling human rights," states @@RANDOMNAME@@, the @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ ambassador to Kawandaland. "And while they should have simply stayed with the former, we cannot allow this to cause a fatal reaction as far as @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@-Kawandalandian relations are concerned. Let's begin medical aid shipments to Kawandaland. While it might not be cheap, such an action may yet preserve our honor in the eyes of the Kawandalandian people."
[effect] - water is thicker than blood
[Option 2] - "Oh, I'd love to bandage up Kawandaland too, ambassador," says @@RANDOMNAME@@, a top-level economic official. "But you do remember that our economy is absolutely hemorrhaging money, right? I do agree that the situation in Kawandaland is a sad one indeed, but we must save ourselves while we still have the chance. Instead of spending millions of @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ on medical aid, we should use those funds to stabilize our markets. It might seem cold and heartless, but I'm just following triage procedures, and I believe the bleeding is worse here in @@NAME@@."
[effect] - the government neither sees nor hears nor sends any evil
[Option 3] - "The actions of my former employers are quite repulsive, and have left quite a mess," admits @@RANDOMNAME@@, a former representative of @@ANIMAL@@ Pharmaceuticals. "But do not despair, I have a fast-acting, extra-strength, non-drowsy method to resolve this! In order to have both economies bounce back, the vacuum left by @@ANIMAL@@ Pharmaceuticals must be filled, and not through foreign aid. If the government provides enough financial backing to rally markets in @@NAME@@, then it’s only a matter of time before corporations like @@CAPITAL@@ Medical shift their interests back towards Kawandaland.”
[effect] - the government prefers to hate the drugs rather than the dealers