[DRAFT] A Signature Issue

[The Derplandz]

Criticism and help are appreciated. I tried to reduce options this time. Thank you!

After a foreign tourist fainted during a tour of @@NAME@@ and was nearly run over, attention has been called to what caused the incident—@@NAME@@'s motto, “@@SLOGAN@@”. After reporters woke @@HIM@@ up, it was discovered that @@NAME@@'s motto is deeply offensive to some. A storm composed of civil rights activists, nationalists, and ministers has reached your office.

Validity: Invalid for nations without a national motto

Option 1:
You turn on the office's television to see historian and culture expert @@RANDOMNAME1@@'s face. "The motto of @@NAME@@ has been criticized for its offensiveness and origin," he states. "We've talked about this before, but the fact that it took a fainting tourist to catch the government's attention is disappointing and unfortunate; however, we now have the chance to educate the public. To summarize, the person who made this motto, @@RANDOMNAME2@@, was a racist warlord who had no respect whatsoever for the nation, and it even hints at aggressiveness towards their culture! We strongly urge the government to change the nation's motto immediately."

Result: nitpicking at the nation's motto is a popular hobby amongst @@DEMONYMPLURAL@@

Option 2:
"And forcing us to change our motto is offensive to our culture!" scoffs nationalist @@RANDOMNAME3@@, chucking your family photos at the television. "We don't have to accommodate to others just because one or two minorities find words a reason to faint. Frankly, I quite like the motto, so let's hold our own culture dear. @@NATION@@ first! @@SLOGAN@@! In fact, why don't we tell everyone off for their culture and somehow force them to change theirs?"

Result: people cannot tell the difference between @@NAME@@ and its neighbours

Option 3:
"I agree, but there is no need to be so extreme. We could even be a bit subtle," suggests your Minister of Propaganda, who has been harassing you to also be given the position of Minister of Educational Propaganda. "@@LEADER@@, allow me to convince your dear Minister of Education to make the government's ideal culture part of the curriculum. Soon, the entire country shall bow before me! I mean you. You'll be famous, and so will our way of life!"

Result: students can be heard from schools practising how to say @@MOTTO@@ properly for one hour every day

Option 4:
"The critics and foreigners are just looking at the literal text of the motto, @@LEADER@@," states @@RANDOMNAME4@@, your Minister of Culture. "They and these civil rights activists need to be shown what '@@SLOGAN@@' really stands for! Let's send educational pamphlets and hire attractive door-to-door people to educate everyone on the true, innocent, actual meaning of these sacred words. Surely, they'll realize they haven't done their research!"

Result: people open doors for attractive people in suits only to receive a lecture about "@@SLOGAN@@"

[Candlewhisper Archive]

After a Bigtopian tourist fainted during a tour of @@NAME@@ and was nearly run over, attention has been called to what caused the incident—@@NAME@@'s @@SLOGAN@@. After reporters woke @@HIM@@ up, it was discovered that @@NAME@@'s motto is deeply offensive to some Bigtopians. A storm composed of civil rights activists, nationalists, and ministers has reached your office.

Have a think about macros work, run a few nations through it to see how it would read, and I'm sure you'll see why this won't work, both grammatically and conceptually.

Even for your own nation it would read like this:

After a Bigtopian tourist fainted during a tour of The Derplandz and was nearly run over, attention has been called to what caused the incident—The Derplandz’s :3. After reporters woke her up, it was discovered that The Derplandz’s motto is deeply offensive to some Bigtopians. A storm composed of civil rights activists, nationalists, and ministers has reached your office.

[The Derplandz]

After a Bigtopian tourist fainted during a tour of @@NAME@@ and was nearly run over, attention has been called to what caused the incident—@@NAME@@'s @@SLOGAN@@. After reporters woke @@HIM@@ up, it was discovered that @@NAME@@'s motto is deeply offensive to some Bigtopians. A storm composed of civil rights activists, nationalists, and ministers has reached your office.

Have a think about macros work, run a few nations through it to see how it would read, and I'm sure you'll see why this won't work, both grammatically and conceptually.

Even for your own nation it would read like this:

After a Bigtopian tourist fainted during a tour of The Derplandz and was nearly run over, attention has been called to what caused the incident—The Derplandz’s :3. After reporters woke her up, it was discovered that The Derplandz’s motto is deeply offensive to some Bigtopians. A storm composed of civil rights activists, nationalists, and ministers has reached your office.

Oops. That was me forgetting to put some words in. .3.

[USS Monitor]

Validity: Invalid for nations without a national motto

Having a motto is required, even if it's something like *. I think I actually have a puppet with * as a motto.

"To summarize, the person who made this motto, @@RANDOMNAME2@@, was a racist monarch who had no respect whatsoever for our nation, and it even hints at aggressiveness towards our culture."

Problem with this, and with the premise in general, is that there are going to be too many nations where it doesn't make sense. Even with the context that it was written by a racist, how is "Freedom Forever" or "*" hinting at aggressiveness towards Bigtopian culture?

[Australian rePublic]

I can underatand how this would be a problem if the motto was "Bigtopia sucks" or something like that, but most mottos aren't "Bigtopia Sucks". Even if the motto was "Bigtooia Sucks", why would that cause someone to faint?

[The Derplandz]

Validity: Invalid for nations without a national motto

Having a motto is required, even if it's something like *. I think I actually have a puppet with * as a motto.

"To summarize, the person who made this motto, @@RANDOMNAME2@@, was a racist monarch who had no respect whatsoever for our nation, and it even hints at aggressiveness towards our culture."

Problem with this, and with the premise in general, is that there are going to be too many nations where it doesn't make sense. Even with the context that it was written by a racist, how is "Freedom Forever" or "*" hinting at aggressiveness towards Bigtopian culture?

Changed it to make more sense.

[The Derplandz]

I can underatand how this would be a problem if the motto was "Bigtopia sucks" or something like that, but most mottos aren't "Bigtopia Sucks". Even if the motto was "Bigtooia Sucks", why would that cause someone to faint?

Maybe they're just really sensitive lol

[USS Monitor]

They must be reeeeeeeaaaaaally sensitive to find "*" offensive.

[Krogon]

The racist monarch line needs to go. It makes no sense that apparently it was a monarch. What if your nation hasn't had a monarch?

Also, how would option 1 work? There isn't going to be a box that shows up, and you can't force someone to go into settings and change their motto, which totally defeats the point.

[The Derplandz]

The racist monarch line needs to go. It makes no sense that apparently it was a monarch. What if your nation hasn't had a monarch?

Also, how would option 1 work? There isn't going to be a box that shows up, and you can't force someone to go into settings and change their motto, which totally defeats the point.

I’ll change the monarch part. As for the last critique, you are correct. Any ideas as to have similar effects without such problems?

[The Derplandz]

They must be reeeeeeeaaaaaally sensitive to find "*" offensive.

Quite!