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[DRAFT] A royal Dilemma (working title)

PostPosted: Sun Sep 09, 2018 5:16 pm
by Oppermenia
[title] A royal Dilemma (working title)
[validity] must have immigration
[desc] Earlier in the year, the nation of Maxtopia abolished its monarchy and its nobility, and exiled its royal family. A month later, they came flooding the border, seeking refuge in @@NAME@@. Now, though, they want their recognition back.
[option 1] "All we want is recognition!" pleads Barry, former Maxtopian Prince. "Before, we had titles, money, and an estate; heck, even castles! But then, they just take that all away?! That isn't right. I don't care we were exiled. But pushing us out of our homes, and taking our money, everything from us, just like that?! Please, @@LEADER@@. I implore you to give us the titles that were stolen from us by those Maxtopians! And, give us the royal recognition we deserve!"
[fallout] Anyone that wants to be called Prince or Princess simply has to ask.
[option 2] "I'm sorry, but that's not my problem," spouts @@RANDOMNAMEMALE, who proceeds to spit. "Don't listen to them, @@LEADER@@. It's not our problem. Whatever dispute they have is with Maxtopia, so it should stay that way. And besides, if we just go on giving royal titles to everyone that asks, then we'll have most of the nation calling themselves Prince or Princess! And, nobody wants that."
[fallout] - - WIP - - Former royals trade their old crowns to put food on their plates.
[option 3] "Don't listen to them, @@LEADER@@!" pleads Max, former Maxtopian King. "Listen, the new Maxtopian government took everything from me - I mean, us. Our titles, our estates, our money, our home … all gone! Please, we need you to get involved, but we need more than titles from you. We need justice! Help us retake the Maxtopian throne, and I promise Maxtopia will compensate you for your good deed once this is over."
[fallout] WIP
[option 3] "Hmm, this gives me an idea!" shouts @@RANDOMNAME@@, your closest advisor. "We couldn't give the Maxtopian @@DEMONYMADJECTIVE@@ royal titles, because they're not our royal family. But, how about we get our own? Think about it! Having a monarchy could increase national pride and morale, and bring more stability to our government! The government might topple, but then our Monarch might still be there to bring the nation together. Heck, we could even make you the Monarch, @@LEADER@@." @@HE@@ oddly drops on one knee and kneels to you. "All hail @@LEADER@@!"
[validity] must not have monarchy policy
[fallout] - - WIP - -
[option 4] "No!" spouts @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Culture. "We can't have a monarchy in our government, that would mess up the whole system! I have a better idea. They talk about national pride and morale, right? Well, why don't we install a figurehead monarchy? That way, we get the benefits of a monarchy without presenting any constitutional crisis. And c'mon, wouldn't it be cool to have a Monarch open Cabinet meetings?"
[validity] must not have monarchy
[fallout] Mutton sales have gone up recently after the Monarch was seen eating some.
[option 5] "You know what?" says @@RANDOMNAME@@, your top military advisor. "Maxtopia just sent their problems right to us! Well, I'm not having it! We need to force Maxtopia to stop sending us their problems and take their royals back, even if it means war!"
[fallout] @@NAME@@'s government considers a country's royals coming to @@NAME@@ a war crime.

Hi, this is a work in progress, as I've said. I mainly need work on the fallouts and title, but I could use constructive criticism on the issue as a whole.

PostPosted: Sun Sep 09, 2018 5:44 pm
by Krogon
Seems very similar to an existing issue. Quite frankly enough to provide overlap. Try a new issue, you seem to be a good writer.

PostPosted: Sun Sep 09, 2018 6:27 pm
by Oppermenia
Krogon wrote:Seems very similar to an existing issue. Quite frankly enough to provide overlap. Try a new issue, you seem to be a good writer.

Alright, I’ll try.
Really, though, I just wrote this issue to write an issue about a monarchy.

PostPosted: Sun Sep 16, 2018 2:29 pm
by Oppermenia
So, maybe someone could look at this?
I mean, it is similar to things that happen in real life. Prince Phillip was a Greek/Danish Prince, until he was exiled to the UK.

PostPosted: Sun Sep 16, 2018 2:38 pm
by USS Monitor
Why are they pestering you to recognize them, but not to help them reclaim the Maxtopian throne?

PostPosted: Sun Sep 16, 2018 2:41 pm
by Oppermenia
USS Monitor wrote:Why are they pestering you to recognize them, but not to help them reclaim the Maxtopian throne?

True.

PostPosted: Tue Sep 18, 2018 1:21 am
by Candlewhisper Archive
Okay let's start here:

[desc] Earlier in the year, the nation of Maxtopia abolished its monarchy and its nobility, and exiled its royal family. A month later, they came flooding the border, seeking refuge in @@NAME@@. Now, though, they want their recognition back.


This premise is enough to stop the issue passing at present, without needing to read any further.

You need to get some clarity in the language. How can a royal family "flood the border". Why are they seeking refuge in @@NAME@@? Even if they do, why is the shape of government in Maxtopia any business of my nation? Why do they want our recognition?

Likewise, this narrative isn't one that lends itself to repetition. It's hard to imagine the same situation could come up again. This isn't a dealbreaker, but there's shades of grey here,and I'd suggest creating a narrative that strains disbelief less on issue repetition.

All in all, this issue is a non-starter at present. You need to get the core premise right before we can even start on the options.

PostPosted: Tue Sep 18, 2018 3:43 am
by Oppermenia
Candlewhisper Archive wrote:Okay let's start here:

[desc] Earlier in the year, the nation of Maxtopia abolished its monarchy and its nobility, and exiled its royal family. A month later, they came flooding the border, seeking refuge in @@NAME@@. Now, though, they want their recognition back.


This premise is enough to stop the issue passing at present, without needing to read any further.

You need to get some clarity in the language. How can a royal family "flood the border". Why are they seeking refuge in @@NAME@@? Even if they do, why is the shape of government in Maxtopia any business of my nation? Why do they want our recognition?

Likewise, this narrative isn't one that lends itself to repetition. It's hard to imagine the same situation could come up again. This isn't a dealbreaker, but there's shades of grey here,and I'd suggest creating a narrative that strains disbelief less on issue repetition.

All in all, this issue is a non-starter at present. You need to get the core premise right before we can even start on the options.

Alright, thanks.

PostPosted: Tue Sep 18, 2018 3:47 am
by Sefy the Great
it's got a nice premise to it. it might be even better if you add a little thing in there that shows if you have a monarchy/feudal system yourself, to... appeal to both sides, maybe? i dunno. good issue, nonetheless.

PostPosted: Tue Sep 18, 2018 4:22 am
by Australian rePublic
But they are royalty. Decomissioned royalty is still royalty

PostPosted: Tue Sep 18, 2018 7:38 am
by Aclion
How can you not care about being exiled but be upset about losing your home?