SUBMITTED: Barely Getting By

[Australian rePublic]

[title] Barely Getting By

[desc] At the height of a cold autumn, and with winter around the corner, many citizens have come to your office, turned your air conditioning to the lowest temperature and started waiving their frost bitten appendages in your face, demanding that you reverse the ban on clothing

[validity] adults only, compulsory nudity

[option] “Shiver me timbres! It's so cold!” shivers @@RANDOMNAME@@, lugging a freezer of ice to throw at you, “we need clothes for where the sun don't shine! You know, for weeks, inside the polar circle. Brrr...”
[effect] cold air no longer slips through the cracks

[option] "How about we construct indoor walkways between every building?" asks architect @@RANDOMNAME@@, "these walkways can be climate controlled and can allow for connections between every building without needing to ever go outside. That way, it doesn't matter what the temperature is it's always warm enough to be nude. Now as for people who work outside, uh, well..."
[effect] fresh air is the number 1 cause of stiffness

[option] "That'll only servd to make fresh air synonymous with hypothermia," suggests @@RANDOMMALENAME@@, who was tackled by your security guards for wearing a tuxedo, "compulsory nudity does work in the tropics, but not elsewhere. So why don't we just make nudity compulsory when the weather hits, say, above 30°C."
[effect] men with small hands have suddenly acquired a taste for mountaineering

[title] Don't be so Nude

[desc] Citizens from the colder parts of @@NAME@@ have come to @@CAPITAL@@ to waive their frost bitten fingers, toes and belly buttons in your face, in protest of compulsory nudism

[validity] compulsory nudity, adults only

[option] "I'm so cold that I'm shivering," complains @@RANDOMNAME@@, lugging a freezer full of ice to throw at you, "Shiver me timbres compulsory nudity was a dumb idea. We need to cover ourselves where the sun don't shine- for weeks on end, during the polar night. Compulsory nudity might work in the tropics, but not in the poles. Brrrr..."
[effect] nude skiing is no longer the national pass time
[reversal] compulsory nudity

[option] "How about we construct indoor walkways between every building?" asks architect @@RANDOMNAME@@, "these walkways can be climate controlled and can allow fof connections between every building without needing to ever go outside. That way, it doesn't matter what the temperature is it's always warm enough to be nude. Now as for people who work outside, uh, well..."
[effect] sexist air conditioning is no longer a first world problem

[option] "Someone made a really good point here," suggests @@RANDOMMALENAME@@, who was tackled by your security guards for wearing a tuxedo, "compulsory nudity does work in the tropics, but not elsewhere. So why don't we just make nudity compulsory when the weather hits, say, above 30°C."
[effect] men with small hands have suddenly acquired a taste for mountaineering

[title] Don't be so Nude

[desc] Citizens from the colder parts of @@NAME@@ have come to @@CAPITAL@@ to waive their frost bitten fingers, toes and belly buttons in your face, in protest of compulsory nudism

[validity] compulsory nudity, adults only

[option] “I'm so cold that I'm shivering,” complains @@RANDOMNAME@@, lugging a freezer full of ice to throw at you, “Shiver me timbres compulsory nudity was a dumb idea. We need to cover ourselves where the sun don't shine- for weeks on end, during the polar night. Compulsory nudity might work in the tropics, but not in the poles. Brrrr...”
[effect] nude skiing is no longer the national pass time
[reversal] compulsory nudity
[option] “But you're the ones who chose to live there,” suggests @@RANDOMMALENAME@@, a tropical resident with a HD camera around his neck, “Compulsory nudity is good. It prevents criminals from hiding their weapons and is less confronting than a person wearing clothes. If you don't like compulsory nudity, move!”
[effect] snow storms cause residents to flee without even the clothes on their backs
[option] “Someone made a really good point here,” suggests @@RANDOMMALENAME@@, who was tackled by your security guards for wearing a tuxedo “compulsory nudity does work in the tropics, but not elsewhere. So why don't we just make nudity compulsory when the weather is hit, say, above 30°C.”
[effect] men with small hands have suddenly acquired a taste for mountaineering

[title] The Naked Truth

[desc] Shivering citizens from the mountainous and polar regions of @@NAME@@ have gathered in your office to wave their frost-bitten fingers in your face, and demand you repeal mandatory nudity

[validity] Must have mandatory nudity, adults only

[option] "I'm so cold that I'm shivering!" complains @@RANDOMNAME@@, lugging around an esky full of ice to throw at you, "We need to cover ourselves where the sun don't shine, for weeks during the winter and polar night. Mandatory nudity might work in the tropics, but not in the poles!"
[effect] nude skiing is no longer the national pass time
[policy reversal] mandatory nudity

[option] "You're the ones who chose to live there," suggests @@RANDOMNAME@@, "no one told you to go live on top of stupidly tall mountains or in the polar circles. If you don't like nudity, move!"
[effect] snow storms cause citizens to flee without even their clothes on their backs

[option] "The first person is right," suggests @@RANDOMNAME@@, "Mandatory nudity does work in the tropics, but not elsewhere. So why don't we only make nudity compulsory if the temperature reaches above say, 30°C"
[effect] men with small hands have suspitiously and rapidly acquired a taste for mountaineering

[The dark Panther]

i like it

[Australian rePublic]

i like it

Thanks!

[Drasnia]

I'm going to leave most of the text alone because it definitely has your voice and any improvement I could suggest would possibly rob it of it. What I do want to focus on is the surprising lack of humor. The effect lines are blah and there is virtually no innuendo. What's gotten into you?

First off, I had to look up what an "esky" was. It's a very Australian word that other people around the world aren't probably going to understand. Use portable cooler or ice chest or something.

You missed a great opportunity to have speaker 1 start off saying "Shiver me timbers!"

One way you could make a joke would be to add in your description "frost-bitten fingers, toes, and other appendages".

Good luck.

[Jutsa]

Also, gotta say, I really like option 3. Maybe you could even raise that to 40°C?
That'd basically be a reversal on the ban on nudity.

(heads up: If it's not already supposed to be a reversal to the ban on nudity, I don't like it as much since it's a lot like option 1)

[Trotterdam]

We've had a submission about this before that never made it.

Also, gotta say, I really like option 3. Maybe you could even raise that to 40°C?

40°C? That'd be unbearably hot even without any clothes.

[Jutsa]

Precisely!

Edit: Huh. Kinda surprised that didn't make it...

Here's hoping this one does, I guess, though I concur with Drasnia — probably won't make it without more humor.

[Chan Island]

Glad to see another stab at this being done. Eventually we will win, because righteousness is on our side

OK, on to the draft.


What's an esky? I suspect it's an Australian slang term that I as a Brit have never heard of.

It's a very short draft. Personally I like that, but I know there are others who might be more inclined putting a bit more meat onto those bare bones.

2 people are suggesting things, while apparently not doing anything at all. I would quite like to see at least one of those speakers doing something relevant/funny in their option.

[Australian rePublic]

Also, gotta say, I really like option 3. Maybe you could even raise that to 40°C?
That'd basically be a reversal on the ban on nudity.

(heads up: If it's not already supposed to be a reversal to the ban on nudity, I don't like it as much since it's a lot like option 1)

No it wouldn't, believe me

[Australian rePublic]

Bump for second draft

[Chan Island]

Just a stylistic thing, but please use the return button to make the issue not seem quite the wall of text.

Anyway, as for the issue itself the problem I have with it as it stands is that it is just a straight up repeal- something the editors have made abundantly clear is something they are not interested in. You need to have some alternative, new routes to go down.

The most foremost one I can think is in city construction. Look for example at Minneapolis in Minnesota: in the city centre they have bridges across various buildings because going outside in their winter temperatures is something people want to avoid. You could have it where people can live all of their lives indoors with no problems.

Another is option 2's person does not address the actual issue very much. I think their reasons for supporting compulsory nudity should be more closely linked to their tropical residence, or cite relevant things.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

We've had a submission about this before that never made it.

Huh, before my time. I would have published that draft, personally.

I like this one too though.

[Ab Humanitatis Scientiam]

What I do want to focus on is the surprising lack of humor. The effect lines are blah and there is virtually no innuendo. What's gotten into you?
...
One way you could make a joke would be to add in your description "frost-bitten fingers, toes, and other appendages".

An issue about a bunch of naked people in the snow demands something about stiffness.

Or blue...um, appendages. That might be pushing it.

[Australian rePublic]

Third Draft is up

Just a stylistic thing, but please use the return button to make the issue not seem quite the wall of text.

Anyway, as for the issue itself the problem I have with it as it stands is that it is just a straight up repeal- something the editors have made abundantly clear is something they are not interested in. You need to have some alternative, new routes to go down.

The most foremost one I can think is in city construction. Look for example at Minneapolis in Minnesota: in the city centre they have bridges across various buildings because going outside in their winter temperatures is something people want to avoid. You could have it where people can live all of their lives indoors with no problems.

Another is option 2's person does not address the actual issue very much. I think their reasons for supporting compulsory nudity should be more closely linked to their tropical residence, or cite relevant things.

Thanks

[Australian rePublic]

Bump

[USS Monitor]

Lose the "belly buttons" and use the "other appendages." Even for people that don't think about what other appendages you might have in mind, it just sounds better. Belly buttons are weirdly specific.

[Australian rePublic]

Lose the "belly buttons" and use the "other appendages." Even for people that don't think about what other appendages you might have in mind, it just sounds better. Belly buttons are weirdly specific.

Next draft is up. Thanks!

[Chan Island]

I'd assume winter would be in full swing when this becomes a problem, or has recently started. Either that or mention that it's been an unusually cold autumn and now people are worried about the potential winter.

Also, in option 2 the word is 'for', I presume.

[Australian rePublic]

I'd assume winter would be in full swing when this becomes a problem, or has recently started. Either that or mention that it's been an unusually cold autumn and now people are worried about the potential winter.

Also, in option 2 the word is 'for', I presume.

Thanks! Edited

[Candlewhisper Archive]

613's title seems to overlap this one.

[Frieden-und Freudenland]

613's title seems to overlap this one.

How about 'The Naked Truth?'

[Chan Island]

613's title seems to overlap this one.

How about 'The Naked Truth?'

'Barely Getting By'.

It's OK, I know where the door is.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

"A Little Bit Cold"

[Australian rePublic]

How about 'The Naked Truth?'

'Barely Getting By'.

It's OK, I know where the door is.

Oh, I like that one!

[Chan Island]

'Barely Getting By'.

It's OK, I know where the door is.

Oh, I like that one!

Well.... OK.

Other than that, I'm happy with this. See what the others think though.