[SUBMITTED] Head in the Clouds

[Jutsa]

So, if you create a weather machine, and it causes ecological disaster... wouldn't that make for a good issue?

I hope you enjoy! Ed: I've saved onto this for a long time and re-went over it twice.

Draft 1.1

Title: Head In The Clouds
The Issue: The creation of the @@DEMONYMINITIALS@@WM5k Weather Machine reduced the intensity of several major storms — resulting, however, in a severe drought and chaotic environmental impacts. Numerous officials and citizens have come to interrupt your lunch to discuss the future of this machine.
Validity: Must have chosen option 433.3 [or any other future issue that creates a weather machine]

Option 1: "I can't believe I hadn't thought of this sooner!" begins your excited Military Adviser, who is currently forgetting that @@HE@@'s supposed to look menacing. "If we can cause meteorological catastrophe in other nations, we can severely limit our enemies' resources, reducing their strength immensely. Sure, it could also significantly damage a few innocent small towns, cities, and wildlife reserves, but I think it'll all be worth it in the end."
[effect] military-made droughts have resulted in foreign products being excruciatingly hard to come by

Option 2: "Are you crazy?" yells @@RANDOMNAME@@, the creator of the weather machine, who happened to walk by to talk to you about @@HIS@@ machine. "My weather machine was made to help us, not hurt others! I came here to ask for more funds to fix the kinks that it currently has — like, for instance, not being able to make it rain. Things will surely balance out if we can create more weather! All I'll need is another few trillion @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ or so."
[effect] scientists work tirelessly to weaken major hurricanes they created in the polar regions

Option 3: "Stop!" shouts @@RANDOMNAME@@, a weather@@MAN@@ who was hiding behind a potted plant. "Don't listen to them, @@LEADER@@! No man should be able to control the weather, or even attempt to! Is it really worth all of this money to maintain and use a machine that is supposed to control something we should have no control over? It's killing nature! This so-called 'weather machine' should be destroyed!"
[effect] meteorologists are happy to report that @@NAME@@ has had its worst storm in months

Option 4: "Here's your lunch," comments your waitress, who looks at the three conspicuous people beside you. "So I hear you wanna control the weather, huh? Maybe you could water my garden for me some time. You know, you could probably make a profit off of that if you sold your work to other nations, even if it doesn't work right. I hear Marche Blanc will do anything for better weather."
[effect] citizens suspect any bad weather that hits @@NAME@@ is caused by a foreign government

Title: Head In The Clouds
The Issue: The creation of the @@DEMONYMINITIALS@@WM5k Weather Machine reduced the intensity of several major storms — resulting, however, in a severe drought and chaotic environmental impacts. Numerous officials and citizens have come to interrupt your lunch to discuss the future of this machine.
Validity: Must have chosen option 433.3 [or any other future issue that creates a weather machine]

Option 1: "I can't believe I hadn't thought of this sooner!" begins your excited Military Advisor, who is currently forgetting that @@HE@@'s supposed to look menacing. "If we can cause droughts in other nations, we can severely limit our enemies' resources, reducing their strength immensely. Sure, it could also significantly damage a few innocent small towns and cities, but I think it'll all be worth it in the end."
[effect] military-made droughts have resulted in foreign farm products being excrutiatigly hard to come by

Option 2: "Are you crazy?" yells @@RANDOMNAME@@, the creator of the weather machine, who happened to walk by at the same time in order to talk to you about @@HIS@@ machine. "My weather machine was made to help us, not hurt others! I came here to ask for more funds to fix the kinks that it currently has — by making it also able to produce rain! If we control both directions, things will surely balance out. All I'll need is another few trillion @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ or so."
[effect] scientists work tirelessly to weaken major hurricanes they created in the polar regions

Option 3: "Stop!" shouts @@RANDOMNAME@@, a weatherman who was hiding behind a potted plant. "Don't listen to them, @@LEADER@@! No man should be able to control the weather. Is it really worth all of this money to maintain and use a machine that is supposed to control something we should have no control over? It's killing nature! This so-called 'weather machine' should be destroyed!"
[effect] weathermen are happy to report that @@NAME@@ has had its worst storm in months

Option 4: "Here's your lunch," comments your waitress, who looks at the three conspicuous people beside you. "So I hear you can control the weather, huh? Maybe you could water my garden for me some time. You know, you could probably make a profit off of that if you sold your work to other nations. I hear Marche Blanc could use a bit less rain."
[effect] citizens suspect that any bad weather that hit @@NAME@@ is caused by a foreign government

[Valentine Z]

Weather Control a la Command and Conquer? I'm sold!

[Jutsa]

The draft's file was "ns_cloudwarfare" so yeah that was what inspired me to make this draft in the first place, and why it's the first option.

[Trotterdam]

The Issue: After the creation of @@DEMONYMINITIALS@@WM5k Weather Machine, which reduced the intensity of several major storms — instead causing a severe drought.

There's a grammar error here. You say "after", but then never follow up with a verb that takes place after this phrase. You're also missing an article. The currect version is either

After the creation of the @@DEMONYMINITIALS@@WM5k Weather Machine, which reduced the intensity of several major storms — it instead caused a severe drought.

or

The creation of the @@DEMONYMINITIALS@@WM5k Weather Machine reduced the intensity of several major storms — instead causing a severe drought.

(Leaving punctuation as is for the sake of argument, not sure if the dash would be better off just being a comma.)

I guess the main narrative question here is whether the editors want the possibility of a weather machine that can actually work, noting that the existing option for building a weather machine has results which strongly imply that the whole thing is a collossal failure (contrary to the usual policy of option results actually doing what they say they will), explained (if I recall correctly) by the editors as a reluctance to allow such super-tech into the narrative. Of course, your unintended consequence that forms the basis of this draft would allow the "collosal failure" to happen while still showing the basic principle to work, but then you give players an option which offers another chance to get things right...

Option 1: "I can't believe I hadn't thought of this sooner!" begins your excited Military Advisor, who is currently forgetting that @@HE@@'s supposed to look menacing. "If we can cause droughts in other nations, we can severely limit our enemies' resources, reducing their strength immensely. Sure, it could also significantly damage a few innocent small towns and cities, but I think it'll all be worth it in the end."
[effect] military-made droughts have resulted in foreign farm products being excrutiatigly hard to come by

"Excruciatingly".

And of course, a weather machine that goes the other way and creates storms would also be pretty valuable militarily... in fact, it would be more useful at directly damaging enemy resources (and better at discriminating between military and civilian targets), while drought is a strategic weapon that can only reduce national production over a long period of time, not cause immediate harm. (A drought hitting your farms won't cause the food already on your supermarkets' shelves to vanish. A tornado hitting the supermarket will.)

The draft's file was "ns_cloudwarfare" so yeah that was what inspired me to make this draft in the first place, and why it's the first option.

Well, I obviously have my own reasons for being interested in this subject

[Jutsa]

I kinda took the effect line as an indication that it didn't do what it was supposed to but that its very wrecking nature could still be used.

Weather manipulation is actually a very interesting subject irl, and whether or not it actually works is something that people are still skeptical of,
although I tried to hint that the guy in option 3 doesn't even really believe it to work properly, but regardless of whether it does or not, it should be destroyed.

@first sentence: Yeah, the after was left in from my previous edit. Used the second option you presented.

@first option: It originally was that, but the reason for my first edit was that I reread the option and it in fact only was supposed to help remove the bad weather.
I could still work that in, if the idea is to make clouds precipitate to death before they reach @@NAME@@, but I'll have to mull it over.
(ftr my second edit was because I read the effect line)

Edit: Also added "and chaotic environmental impacts"
Ed2: I'll remove it if you think it's a bit much or unexplained but it's there atm.

[Sacara]

Because you always help me with my drafts, I will definitely reciprocate the favor and give a few of my opinions.

Option 1: "I can't believe I hadn't thought of this sooner!" begins your excited Military Advisor, who is currently forgetting that @@HE@@'s supposed to look menacing. "If we can cause droughts in other nations, we can severely limit our enemies' resources, reducing their strength immensely. Sure, it could also significantly damage a few innocent small towns and cities, but I think it'll all be worth it in the end."

I think I mentioned this in another draft of yours, but I have never really been fond of the idea of a speaker pointing out the the flaws in their own option.

Option 2: "Are you crazy?" yells @@RANDOMNAME@@, the creator of the weather machine, who happened to walk by at the same time in order to talk to you about @@HIS@@ machine. "My weather machine was made to help us, not hurt others! I came here to ask for more funds to fix the kinks that it currently has — by making it also able to produce rain! If we control both directions, things will surely balance out. All I'll need is another few trillion @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ or so."

Maybe change trillion to billion? It seems like an awful lot.

Option 3: "Stop!" shouts @@RANDOMNAME@@, a weatherman who was hiding behind a potted plant. "Don't listen to them, @@LEADER@@! No man should be able to control the weather. Is it really worth all of this money to maintain and use a machine that is supposed to control something we should have no control over? It's killing nature! This so-called 'weather machine' should be destroyed!"
[effect] weathermen are happy to report that @@NAME@@ has had its worst storm in months

Personally, I believe you should change this to some wingnut and save the weatherman for the effect line. That's just me, though.

Option 4: "Here's your lunch," comments your waitress, who looks at the three conspicuous people beside you. "So I hear you can control the weather, huh? Maybe you could water my garden for me some time. You know, you could probably make a profit off of that if you sold your work to other nations. I hear Marche Blanc could use a bit less rain."

I like this option.

Overall, very good issue, Jutsa. Not much I could find.

[Jutsa]

Many thanks for your comments, Sacara.

Option 1: Eh, maybe, but I kinda feel like unless it's presented in the following option(which is long enough as is), it's better brought up just so the person picking it knows what's going on before the effect line.

Option 2: Trillions is definitely too much but the option this is supposed to chain from says "billions" so I figured I'd make it an over-dramatically large number.
I'll gladly downgrade it if you think it's a bit much, though.

Option 3: Idk, a wingnut wouldn't have as much merit as a weather-crazed weatherman. Besides, I quite like the idea of the effect line hinting that he/she may have had...
other intentions.
Edit: FTR this was inspired from an episode in Eureka.

Option 4: Thanks. :3c

[Jutsa]

Boink!

[Trotterdam]

Title: Head In The Clouds
The Issue: The creation of the @@DEMONYMINITIALS@@WM5k Weather Machine reduced the intensity of several major storms — resulting, however, in a severe drought and chaotic environmental impacts. Numerous officials and citizens have come to interrupt your lunch to discuss the future of this machine.
Validity: Must have chosen option 433.3 [or any other future issue that creates a weather machine]

Option 1: "I can't believe I hadn't thought of this sooner!" begins your excited Military Advisor, who is currently forgetting that @@HE@@'s supposed to look menacing. "If we can cause droughts in other nations, we can severely limit our enemies' resources, reducing their strength immensely. Sure, it could also significantly damage a few innocent small towns and cities, but I think it'll all be worth it in the end."
[effect] military-made droughts have resulted in foreign farm products being excrutiatigly hard to come by

Option 2: "Are you crazy?" yells @@RANDOMNAME@@, the creator of the weather machine, who happened to walk by at the same time in order to talk to you about @@HIS@@ machine. "My weather machine was made to help us, not hurt others! I came here to ask for more funds to fix the kinks that it currently has — by making it also able to produce rain! If we control both directions, things will surely balance out. All I'll need is another few trillion @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ or so."
[effect] scientists work tirelessly to weaken major hurricanes they created in the polar regions

Option 3: "Stop!" shouts @@RANDOMNAME@@, a weatherman who was hiding behind a potted plant. "Don't listen to them, @@LEADER@@! No man should be able to control the weather. Is it really worth all of this money to maintain and use a machine that is supposed to control something we should have no control over? It's killing nature! This so-called 'weather machine' should be destroyed!"
[effect] weathermen are happy to report that @@NAME@@ has had its worst storm in months

Option 4: "Here's your lunch," comments your waitress, who looks at the three conspicuous people beside you. "So I hear you can control the weather, huh? Maybe you could water my garden for me some time. You know, you could probably make a profit off of that if you sold your work to other nations. I hear Marche Blanc could use a bit less rain."
[effect] citizens suspect that any bad weather that hit @@NAME@@ is caused by a foreign government

So, I love the fourth option because it's totally perfect for my nation, but there's a problem here. The fourth assumption assumes that you already have a working weather machine and discusses how to put your fully-functioning weather machine to use, whereas the rest of the issue is about your weather machine not working properly and what to do about it (1. work with what you have and just take advantage of the parts that do work, 2. invest lots of funding into fixing it, 3. give up). Option 1 is sorta also about "what do we use the weather machine for once we have it", but options 2 and 4 just don't seem like they fit on the same issue.

[Jutsa]

Naeh, I feel like option 2 is more of a "lets try to fix it by also trying to make it rain",
and option 1 sorta tries to monopolize on the fact that it is kinda broken.

Option 4, I can definitely see... but you can still sell malfunctioning experimental technology, right?

Edit: Idk, I'll take your thoughts into consideration regardless.
If you've got any ideas on how to make them work a bit better, I'm all eyes.

[Kurnugia]

If you are going to sell the machine, why not for private use?

[Jutsa]

Hmm... interesting question.

The thing is, that really wouldn't work for communist nations. I think selling weapon technology to other governments is still a thing communists can do, though...
right? Or am I wrong in that?

[Frieden-und Freudenland]

Hey, nice issue, Jutsa!

My question is this: the issue 433 actually mentions a weather machine that will divert and/or weaken storms. While the details of the mechanism have been left unspecified in the original issue, your draft seems to suggest that this machine (1) is capable of causing droughts, but (2) is currently incapable of causing rainfall (Option 2). This kinda makes me question the utility of the suggestion in Option 2. I mean, if you can stipulate that the weather machine can engender droughts (which is an ad hoc addition to its original function of fighting off storms), why shouldn't you be able to stipulate that it can produce rain as well?

I think you could start out with the assumption that this weather machine can change the weather in any way we like, and then you could use Option 2 to make the inventor suggest that the weather be regulated to attract tourists, especially by creating "unseasonable" weather. For example, most ski resorts will be almost empty in summer, while most beaches will be almost empty in winter, due to the unfavorable weather conditions. But if you use this machine to generate snow in the summer on mountain tops, or to produce lots of sunlight in winter in coastal areas, you can have skiing tourists and beach vacationers all year round - and double your tourism revenue. Just a thought.

[Trotterdam]

I mean, if you can stipulate that the weather machine can engender droughts (which is an ad hoc addition to its original function of fighting off storms), why shouldn't you be able to stipulate that it can produce rain as well?

Storms come with rain. Stopping storms tends to mean stopping rain. The machine just turns out to stop rain a little too well.

I think you could start out with the assumption that this weather machine can change the weather in any way we like,

The problem is, the current issue assumes it doesn't.

#433 The Worst Storm To Hit @@NAME@@ Since... Yesterday?
3. the attempt to control the weather has ended in environmental disaster
-21 Weather
Which is one of the biggest Weather penalties in the game, only #599 4 and #461 5 cause more damage to your Weather.

The largest single increase in Weather is only +20, from #382 4.

The latter bit obtained in a kludgey way, since when I tried to check it the proper way, I got a program crash. Argh. I looked it over very carefully and I don't see anything I'm doing wrong. In fact, if I isolate the part of the code that the crash happens in and run it in a sandbox, it works fine. I rather suspect that this bug is not in fact my fault... but even if it's a library/compiler error I still don't see how it can happen.

[Jutsa]

Yeah, indeed, my original draft actually assumed it could _make_ rain,
but I went with the narrative and instead made it destroy rain a bit too well.

Funnily enough, existing make-rain-go-away methods actually include making it rain more,
so it all goes away before it hits a specific area.

Indeed, this was a wonky draft to work on.
I won't be too disappointed if this doesn't end up working for the game,
but I'm still going to try.

[Australian rePublic]

Yeah, indeed, my original draft actually assumed it could _make_ rain,
but I went with the narrative and instead made it destroy rain a bit too well.

Funnily enough, existing make-rain-go-away methods actually include making it rain more,
so it all goes away before it hits a specific area.

Indeed, this was a wonky draft to work on.
I won't be too disappointed if this doesn't end up working for the game,
but I'm still going to try.

Hmmm... that's interesting. The only weather control device I know about is cloud seeding, which makes artificial rain/snow. Maybe explain a bit about which real life techniques you use

[Jutsa]

Cloud seeding is the only quite possibly really effective way I know about, but it doesn't fit the narrative of the option this is supposed to chain from.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

I like this draft. Looking forward to seeing it shape up.

Trotterdam has good advice. Assume that the weather machine doesn't work as intended, but it does do something.

[Jutsa]

I thought that's what I did...

Well, hopefully it's a bit better now, though I'll let you guys decide.

[Candensia]

As a total weather nerd, I am really liking this draft.


In option three, you describe the speaker as a “weatherman”, meaning that the previous macro would need to be @@RANDOMMALENAME@@.

Of course, you could use “meteorologist” or “local meteorologist” to get around this, if you desire to keep using @@RANDOMNAME@@.

Lovely work so far, Jutsa.

[Jutsa]

Teehee, thanks. :3c

I'll make the speaker a male. I see more men than women giving the weather anyways. I'm not entirely sure why...

Ed: It'll be a nice gender balance with the waitress.

[Trotterdam]

In option three, you describe the speaker as a “weatherman”, meaning that the previous macro would need to be @@RANDOMMALENAME@@.

Of course, you could use “meteorologist” or “local meteorologist” to get around this, if you desire to keep using @@RANDOMNAME@@.

Or, you know, weather@@MAN@@.

Though there's still the plural in the effect line...

[Jutsa]

Gaaaah, confound you English and your patriarchal inabilities to make gender neutral terms sound that good!

Changing to weather@@MAN@@ and meteoroligists. *mumbly grumbly* *kicks dusty crumb*

[Jutsa]

Bump again. Probably will leave this one up for another week or so unless major suggestions are made.

[Australian rePublic]

Option 1 is a violation 9f the Geneva Convention. Thout shall not alter the weather to help you in war efforts