[DRAFT] Orbital dilemma

[Earthbound Immortal Squad]

Description

After @@NATION@@'s most recent space stations launch a nation celebration is in order however before it can start you are brought to your office by a team of construction experts who inform you of a small design flaw.

1)"There's HOW much unused excess space!" Rants your general @@RANDOMNAME@@. "We might as well make some use of it. Come to think of it you know how come the Maxtopians are currently massing troops near our boarder, well with your permission I can transport a tonne of orbital cannons, that'll drive them back and all others who stand against us."

Post description) Aggressive nations against @@NATION@@ are reminded to look upwards.

2)"I agree cannons could prove useful but not at blowing people up." Says your foreign minister @@RANDOMNAME@@. "We can use them to destroy incoming asteroids on collision for ourself and our neighbours in @@REGION@@, that should certainly improve relations."

Post description)The other nations of @@REGION@@ can now neglect their space program knowing @@NATION@@ will do all the work for them.

3)"Cannons! Are you out of your mind!" Screams leading scientist of the stations construction. "Why not use the space to create a state of the art science facility after all the chances of a new station in our lifetimes are billions to one and there is so much to explore out there."

Post description) @@NATION@@ has begun the long voyage to create the science station.

I appreciate this may not be in a traditional format please respect I am a very new issue makers I will take into account all comments.

[Kenmoria]

@@NATION@@ should just be @@NAME@@.

[USS Monitor]

You need a validity check to make sure the nation has a space program -- or at least high enough scientific advancement for a space program to be reasonable. For example, I don't want to get issues about space missions in The 19th Century, but players with futuristic nations might like an issue about a space station.

The formatting is a little wonky, but you can just use the boxes on the issues submission page to sort that out when you're ready to submit. Kenmoria's right about the @@NAME@@ macro.

The writing needs a little work. When you say "a small design flaw" in the description, I was expecting something like an air leak or power supply is on the fritz and it's messing with life support or the space station's orbit isn't stable. Having lots of extra room is something the space program would know about before the space station is launched. "We're building a space station; what do we do with this space," is an OK topic if it hasn't been done before, but that's not a design flaw.

See if you can add some humor or cultural references or something to give it more flavor.

[Ransium]

You should be aware I wrote a draft on a similar subject about a year ago that I’m pretty attached to: viewtopic.php?f=13&t=400038&hilit=New+satellite+blues

[Australian rePublic]

Hello. Not a bad little issue you got here. Now, let's take a look:
Description- space program, not space station. A space station is something else. Also, please don't undermine Ransium's issue. He worked hard on it

[Candlewhisper Archive]

As someone who has had at least six unpublished issues discarded because drafts submitted later by other folk, I can confirm that it's not much fun to have your work be lost because of this. However, don't feel you are obliged to abandon the draft. Ultimately, we as a team will always look to publish the best issue, not the one that came first.

However, we're talking Ransium here, who won the Issue Writing Contest. So you know, if you want to compete with his issue, then be really, really, really good.

[USS Monitor]

Hello. Not a bad little issue you got here. Now, let's take a look:
Description- space program, not space station. A space station is something else. Also, please don't undermine Ransium's issue. He worked hard on it

I'm pretty sure he actually means a space station.

As someone who has had at least six unpublished issues discarded because drafts submitted later by other folk, I can confirm that it's not much fun to have your work be lost because of this. However, don't feel you are obliged to abandon the draft. Ultimately, we as a team will always look to publish the best issue, not the one that came first.

However, we're talking Ransium here, who won the Issue Writing Contest. So you know, if you want to compete with his issue, then be really, really, really good.

Yeah... The way these issues are written right now, Ransium's is better. This needs a kick-ass rewrite, or you need to try a different premise.

Maybe you could make an issue about an actual design flaw, like I thought it was going to be when I first read the desc. An air leak on a space station is actually an issue idea that I've had rattling around my head for a year or more, but never actually wrote. I was going to have the air leak caused by a baseball game where someone hits a home run and breaks a window.