[title] Brown Out (Not the Electrical Kind)
[desc] @@NAME@@ was met with embarrassment last week, when the house of parliament played host to delegates from all around the world. An error on the invitation which said "attire optional" rather than "black tie optional" saw many delegates attend in the nude, but that paled in comparison to the bigger problem of the night- running out of toilet paper. A report into the incident discovered that 20% of all of the nation's timbre is used in toilet paper production. Advocates are now demanding that @@NAME@@ switch to bidets
[validity] adults only
[option] "Bidgets are a good idea," suggests @@RANDOMNAME@@, who sells plumbing supplies, "I read on Encyclowiki that bidets are better for your health, clean better and can save millions of trees, which provide oxygen and get rid of carbon dioxide. Isn't that a good thing? Also, if you had bidetsN this never would have happened! I say we force all bathrooms, public and private, to retrofit bidgets!"
[effect] thanks to bidets, drinking water is in high demand
[option] "Yea mate, but aren't you forgettin' something?" asks @@RANDOMNAME@@, the mayor of a desert city, "We got a drought out here. We already have water restrictions, we can't afford to waste more water on cleaning ourselves! Besides, who wants to use a yucky bowl that other people use? Toilet paper is much more hygienic!"
[effect] protestors unchain themselves from trees when they remember the benefits of toilet paper
[option] "Aren't we forgetting the real problem here?" asks @@RANDOMNAME@@, the deputy leader, "the idiots who arranged this event! Who cares about a few bloody trees, @@NAME@@ became a laughing stock because of this! And on top of that, they had to serve bloody curry! Do you remember that Maxtopian who sat on the chair in my office in the nude after not being able to wipe? **cringe** I say we find the idiots responsible for this and fire them!"
[effect] government interns are often fired for making double tall frothochinos hold the cream and extra milk with one sugar instead of double tall frothochinos hold the cream extra milk with 2 sugars