An Armory of Antiques

[Vlanlados]

[Title]An Armory of Antiques
[Description] After furtively photographing a massive military parade in Blackacre, your chief spy returned with blurry black and white photographs of the strangest military machines. Large bombs that took to the air without any visible pilot, aircraft that had no propellers and rifles that could fire many times without reloading. Concerned generals and military scientists have met to discuss the clear technological edge many nations seem to pose over your own.

Option 1. "Its quite obvious what the issue here is." Says @@RANDOMNAME@@ the designer of the Mrk 1 @@ANIMAL@@, the first tank produced by @@NAME@@ which has been refereed to by soldiers as a 'giant sardine cooker'. "We badly need more great minds in our research operations and it is quite clear that we are currently...behind, to say the least, in arms technology. If we can try and convince some people with incentives to become designers and scientists working for the military as well as some extra funding, I'm sure we will get a modern and well equipped military...eventually, it will probably take some time."
[Effect] Millions of @@CURRENCY@@ are spent desperately trying to improve the military.

Option 2. "Actually, its not as simple as that." Says @@RANDOMNAME@@, an ace pilot who served in last war. "Airpower is the way to the future, this was proven in the last war as me and my squad clearly proved that the canvas wings of our biplanes where key to victory on the fronts we where on. Focusing on all of the military will take to long and will simply just leave us behind, but focusing our efforts on air power is simply what will make us soar above our enemies! In fact, we could even make a sky navy using airships, just think, sky battleships! Now we don't see any of other nations with those!"
[Effect] The military still uses trenches while the airforce is working on jets and sky battleships.

Option 3. "I have to agree with the fly boy over there, just not with just air power." Says General @@RANDOMNAMEMALE@@ as he paces back and fourth. "I believe that we should instead focus our efforts on different things until they are up to scratch with the rest of the world, then focus on other stuff until that is up to date and so on, repeating the possess until we have everything modern and ready to fight any enemy's of @@NAME@@! It will leave us behind in a few area's for quite a while, but its better then being behind in everything for however long that tank maker's plan will take."
[Effect] @@NAME@@ Is a real life example of schizo tech

Option 4 "It's quite obvious what the issue is." Says Retired General @@RANDOMNAME@@ over the telegram. "This is a clear reason why we should stick to the old ways, if we add all this fancy new thingamajigs to our military, the men will become soft! I mean really, how can we call our men brave when they hide in those metal boxes you call Mark 1 @@ANIMAL@@'s! You would have to be a fool to listen to any of these people! In fact, we should remove those flying machines and so called tanks to focus on what really makes us powerful, our spirit, courage, and strength! Just like in the good old days."
[Effect] The bayonet is cutting edge technology

Option 5 "To be honest, no mater what we do we will be behind in something at this point." Says @@RANDOMNAME@@ a expert in ambush tactics. "We should instead focus on ways to make use of what we have and use that to the best of our ability, as well as using things in multiple ways. Not many people know this but you can easily turn a artillery round into a mine in a pinch, you just be careful on concealing it unless you want it to blow up while you set it. Regardless, we should focus on our tactics, infantry, and reliability above all else and teach the soldiers a thing or two about those artillery mines."
[Effect] @@NAME@@'s army looks more like rebels then a proper standing army.

Option 6 "I overheard everything and personally, I see this in a different way." says a odd looking man who climbed into your office uninvited. "Instead of researching new ways to kill people, why don't you spend that money on new ways for people to enjoy themselves, new ways to get around town, and so on. Heck we should just forget about all this war stuff and work on what really maters, the quality of life in @@NAME@@."
[Effect] Military designers have started designing buses and trams since the military was dismantled.

[Title]An Army of Antique's
[Description]After a massive military parade in Blackacre, a spy returned with black and white photo's of odd looking tanks with fancy looking gadgets, large bombs that can fly and aircraft without propellers. Seeing this as a clear issue, you have called the best military scientists and generals in @@NAME@@ to your office.
[Validity] Low technology nations with Military's

Option 1. "Its quite obvious what the issue here is." Says @@RANDOMNAME@@ the designer of the Mrk 1 @@ANIMAL@@, the first tank produced by @@NAME@@. "We badly need more great minds in our research operations and it is quite clear that we are currently...behind, to say the least, in arms technology. If we can try and convince some people with incentives to become designers and scientists working for the military as well as some extra funding, I'm sure we will get a modern and well equipped military."
[Effect] Millions of @@CURRENCY@@ are spent desperately trying to improve the military.

Option 2. "Actually, its not as simple as that." Says @@RANDOMNAME@@, an ace pilot who served in last war. "Airpower is the way to the future, this was proven in the last war as me and my squad clearly proved that the canvas wings of our aircraft clearly where key to victory on the fronts we where on. Focusing on all of the military will take to long and will simply just leave us behind, but focusing our efforts on air power is simply what will make us soar above our enemy's!"
[Effect] The military still uses trenches while the airforce is working on jets and sky battleships.

Option 3. "I have to agree with the fly boy over there, just not with just air power." Says General @@RANDOMNAMEMALE@@ as he paces back and fourth. "I believe that we should instead focus our efforts on different things until they are up to scratch with the rest of the world, then focus on other stuff until that is up to date and so on, repeating the possess until we have everything modern and ready to fight any enemy's of @@NAME@@!"
[Effect] @@NAME@@ Is a real life example of schizo tech

Option 4 "It's quite obvious what the issue is." Says Retired General @@RANDOMNAME@@ over the telegram. "This is a clear reason why we should stick to the old ways, if we add all this fancy new thingamajigs to our military, the men will become soft! I mean really, how can we call our men brave when they hide in those metal boxes you call Mark 1 @@ANIMAL@@'s! You would have to be a fool to listen to any of these people! Just leave things be and we will do fine without those fancy flying machines or metal boxes."
[Effect] The gun has given way to the sword

Option 5 "I overheard everything and personally, I see this in a different way." says a odd looking man who climbed into your office uninvited. "Instead of researching new ways to kill people, why don't you spend that money on new ways for people to enjoy themselves, new ways to get around town, and so on. Heck we should just forget about all this war stuff and work on what really maters, the quality of life in @@NAME@@."
[Effect] Military designers have started designing buses and trams since the military was dismantled.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

I like it.

There's a lot of little editing jobs here, like messing with punctuation and the like, but at its core, this issue has a funny premise and characterful writing.

I'll let the community help you out with the English language stuff, but you should be proud of this - an excellent first draft.

[Australian rePublic]

Hello and welcome to Got Issues! It's always nice to see a new writer!

This is brilliant for a first draft

Interesting premise here indeed, but I'm curious, are there any nations that actually have these problem and these primitive technologies? If so, then this would make a great issue!

[Vlanlados]

Interesting premise here indeed, but I'm curious, are there any nations that actually have these problem and these primitive technologies? If so, then this would make a great issue!

Probably, or at least I would assume so. After all, if the puffing billy banner is anything to go by, I have been in that kind of situation. That, and there is a primitiveness score. Regardless, someone somewhere probably has WW1 style tech....Probably. Also, thanks.

[Australian rePublic]

Interesting premise here indeed, but I'm curious, are there any nations that actually have these problem and these primitive technologies? If so, then this would make a great issue!

Probably, or at least I would assume so. After all, if the puffing billy banner is anything to go by, I have been in that kind of situation. That, and there is a primitiveness score. Regardless, someone somewhere probably has WW1 style tech....Probably. Also, thanks.

Hmmm... maybe Africa?

[Vlanlados]

Hmmm... maybe Africa?

Oh, you mean in real life. Well, Africa would defiantly be a good example considering all they really have are trucks and guns. As far as I know, no tanks or aircraft.

[Caracasus]

Hmmm... maybe Africa?

Oh, you mean in real life. Well, Africa would defiantly be a good example considering all they really have are trucks and guns. As far as I know, no tanks or aircraft.

Depends on the country really... Nigeria for instance has a fairly modern armed forces - tanks and fighter planes and all that, as do many other African nations.

If I were you, I'd make primitiveness (or lack of scientific advancement) important but also defense forces. I can envision a primitive state that ploughs a lot of money into its defense forces having tanks, fighter planes etc. bought from overseas.

EDIT: I'd also consider an option where the speaker accepts that your military is never going to be the best, so therefore instead of spending billions on equipment you should instead work towards creating an armed forces that excels in guerrilla warfare.

[USS Monitor]

Hmmm... maybe Africa?

Oh, you mean in real life. Well, Africa would defiantly be a good example considering all they really have are trucks and guns. As far as I know, no tanks or aircraft.

North Korea.

[Australian rePublic]

Africa is not a country, it's a continent, with many, many countries. This primative style military would only apply to some of them. Maybe briefly research some of these nations' militaries (more than one) to get a perspective of how it works

Oh, you mean in real life. Well, Africa would defiantly be a good example considering all they really have are trucks and guns. As far as I know, no tanks or aircraft.

North Korea.

North Korea has no airforce? Well, you learn something new ev everyday

[Candlewhisper Archive]

It absolutely does have an airforce. 940 aircraft, mostly Chinese or Soviet sourced.

I think Monitor is pointing out that they're a good example of a nation whose military tech might lag behind most industrialised nations, though I'd argue that they're not the best example, as they're specifically a nation that places a lot of national self-esteem in their high military strength for their small size. Thanks to "Songun" (military first, as a government priority) their military tech level is right up there with the world leaders: it's their everyday and civilian level tech which is super-primitive.

Though admittedly, counting an Antonov An-2 as part of your airforce does kinda fit the picture. Not that supposedly high tech military nations are much better. The USA still uses B-52s, and Russia uses Tu-95s.

[Australian rePublic]

North Korea doesn't need advanced weapons, simply because anyone is too scared of their nukes to touch them. North Korea's threat of nuclear way is probably the only reason why the nation still exists, imho, and that's a horrible and scary thing

[Trotterdam]

Even random thug militias in the most pathetic third-world nation still have AK-47s, which are almost as good as modern assault rifles (possibly better, if you aren't able to provide good maintainance, since they're quite robust). Personal firearm technology hasn't really improved much since WW2.

Where petty warlords lag is expensive military equipment like tanks and planes, mostly because they just can't afford them or the infrastructure (like airfields) it would take to properly support them.

Honestly, I think their weapon technology being more advanced than their everything-else technology is part of the reason why things are such a mess over there. When your only possessions are a mud hut with no running water and an assault rifle, shooting up your neighbors is going to sound more attractive than staying at home.

North Korea doesn't need advanced weapons, simply because anyone is too scared of their nukes to touch them. North Korea's threat of nuclear way is probably the only reason why the nation still exists, imho, and that's a horrible and scary thing

North Korea has been around for decades before they developed nukes. Even now, their nukes are of pretty dubious quality.

I think the main issue is that even a conventional war against such a heavily-militarized state would have heavy casualties, even for the winning side. In a world that still remembers the horrors of Vietnam, that's going to be a hard political sell regardless of how much North Korea's government deserves to be overthrown.

[Trotterdam]

Also, I think an issue about military technology has just been added.

What else can I make of effect lines like "the decommissioned tank divisions of other nations are being bought up en masse by @@NAME@@" and "soldiers find that home gadgets and power tools are more effective as improvised weapons than the guns they've been issued"?

[Vlanlados]

Also, I think an issue about military technology has just been added.

So, I take it I was beaten to the punch....again....

[Trotterdam]

So, I take it I was beaten to the punch....again....

The issue has been posted here, and it's not as close to your premise as I thought you would be.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

Yeah, it's completely different. I was working on that issue when I commented on your one - if I thought there was an overlap I would have let you know.

Also, that submission was over a year old anyway...

[Caracasus]

Right. I showed an interest in this and it'd be rude for me not to give some proper detailed feedback. Here goes:

[Title]An Army of Antique's

An army of antiques. (Note - possessive apostrophes only go on a word if that word "owns" something else in a sentence. E.G The Dog's basket or The baby's cries. Both the basket and the cries belong to the dog and the baby in those examples. The antiques in this sentence don't "own" anything.)

I'd also suggest, given that this is about the actual weapons and the technology used by your army, changing the name to An Armory of Antiques.

[Description]After a massive military parade in Blackacre, a spy returned with black and white photo's of odd looking tanks with fancy looking gadgets, large bombs that can fly and aircraft without propellers. Seeing this as a clear issue, you have called the best military scientists and generals in @@NAME@@ to your office.
[Validity] Low technology nations with Military's

I'm in agreement with CWA here, it's silly and funny enough to make it distinct from the tonnes of military based issues. I like the basic premise. Can I suggest adding a little more... sparkle to it though?

Perhaps: [Description] After furtively photographing a massive military parade in Blackacre, your chief spy returned with blurry black and white photographs of the strangest military machines. Large bombs that took to the air without any visible pilot, aircraft that had no propellers and rifles that could fire many times without reloading. Concerned generals and military scientists have met to discuss the clear technological edge many nations seem to pose over your own.

(I was reminded of some Victorian gentleman explorer commenting on an exotic and strange country with your initial premise and assumed technology level, so changed some of the language around to make it fit. Keep or discard as you see fit. Additionally, you've used possessive apostrophes again where you don't need to.) I would also strongly suggest thinking about having low defense spending as a perquisite for this issue as I've said before.

Option 1. "Its quite obvious what the issue here is." Says @@RANDOMNAME@@ the designer of the Mrk 1 @@ANIMAL@@, the first tank produced by @@NAME@@. "We badly need more great minds in our research operations and it is quite clear that we are currently...behind, to say the least, in arms technology. If we can try and convince some people with incentives to become designers and scientists working for the military as well as some extra funding, I'm sure we will get a modern and well equipped military."
[Effect] Millions of @@CURRENCY@@ are spent desperately trying to improve the military.

This is a standard response here, though it edges a little too close to the "perfect" answer - e.g. pump funds into R&D. Perhaps the general could note how massively expensive it would be to get the army up to speed with the rest of the world? Also do include some humour - perhaps something like The designer of the Mk1 @@ANIMAL@@ tank, affectionately nick-named The SpamCan by the army

Option 2. "Actually, its not as simple as that." Says @@RANDOMNAME@@, an ace pilot who served in last war. "Airpower is the way to the future, this was proven in the last war as me and my squad clearly proved that the canvas wings of our aircraft clearly where key to victory on the fronts we where on. Focusing on all of the military will take to long and will simply just leave us behind, but focusing our efforts on air power is simply what will make us soar above our enemy's!"
[Effect] The military still uses trenches while the airforce is working on jets and sky battleships.

Enemies, no need for a possessive apostrophe. Again, include some humour. Perhaps the ace pilot who served in the last war flew a bi-plane or hot air balloon? I like the humour present in the effect line here - try to replicate that when you're drawing up other effects.

Option 3. "I have to agree with the fly boy over there, just not with just air power." Says General @@RANDOMNAMEMALE@@ as he paces back and fourth. "I believe that we should instead focus our efforts on different things until they are up to scratch with the rest of the world, then focus on other stuff until that is up to date and so on, repeating the possess until we have everything modern and ready to fight any enemy's of @@NAME@@!"
[Effect] @@NAME@@ Is a real life example of schizo tech

How is this different from the first option? Surely the first option also calls for massively modernizing everything too?

Option 4 "It's quite obvious what the issue is." Says Retired General @@RANDOMNAME@@ over the telegram. "This is a clear reason why we should stick to the old ways, if we add all this fancy new thingamajigs to our military, the men will become soft! I mean really, how can we call our men brave when they hide in those metal boxes you call Mark 1 @@ANIMAL@@'s! You would have to be a fool to listen to any of these people! Just leave things be and we will do fine without those fancy flying machines or metal boxes."
[Effect] The gun has given way to the sword

Okay, a decent option though I think you might be missing a trick here. This option could go full-on crazy. Effect line is... OK, but I'd suggest something that is easier understood as a consequence of the choice. Perhaps the breech-loading musket is considered cutting edge technology by the nation's armed forces (Needs some tidying up)

Option 5 "I overheard everything and personally, I see this in a different way." says a odd looking man who climbed into your office uninvited. "Instead of researching new ways to kill people, why don't you spend that money on new ways for people to enjoy themselves, new ways to get around town, and so on. Heck we should just forget about all this war stuff and work on what really maters, the quality of life in @@NAME@@."
[Effect] Military designers have started designing buses and trams since the military was dismantled.

I think this could be funnier... I'll see if I can think of how.

[Vlanlados]

[Title]An Army of Antique's

An army of antiques. (Note - possessive apostrophes only go on a word if that word "owns" something else in a sentence. E.G The Dog's basket or The baby's cries. Both the basket and the cries belong to the dog and the baby in those examples. The antiques in this sentence don't "own" anything.)

I'd also suggest, given that this is about the actual weapons and the technology used by your army, changing the name to An Armory of Antiques.

Alright, that seems fair enough and it still gets the point across, so, I'll rename it that.

[Description]After a massive military parade in Blackacre, a spy returned with black and white photo's of odd looking tanks with fancy looking gadgets, large bombs that can fly and aircraft without propellers. Seeing this as a clear issue, you have called the best military scientists and generals in @@NAME@@ to your office.
[Validity] Low technology nations with Military's

I'm in agreement with CWA here, it's silly and funny enough to make it distinct from the tonnes of military based issues. I like the basic premise. Can I suggest adding a little more... sparkle to it though?

Perhaps: [Description] After furtively photographing a massive military parade in Blackacre, your chief spy returned with blurry black and white photographs of the strangest military machines. Large bombs that took to the air without any visible pilot, aircraft that had no propellers and rifles that could fire many times without reloading. Concerned generals and military scientists have met to discuss the clear technological edge many nations seem to pose over your own.

(I was reminded of some Victorian gentleman explorer commenting on an exotic and strange country with your initial premise and assumed technology level, so changed some of the language around to make it fit. Keep or discard as you see fit. Additionally, you've used possessive apostrophes again where you don't need to.) I would also strongly suggest thinking about having low defense spending as a perquisite for this issue as I've said before.

Thats...actually really good. But is it really okay if I use all this stuff? Though, I guess you are kinda requesting for it to be changed to something along the lines like that.

Option 1. "Its quite obvious what the issue here is." Says @@RANDOMNAME@@ the designer of the Mrk 1 @@ANIMAL@@, the first tank produced by @@NAME@@. "We badly need more great minds in our research operations and it is quite clear that we are currently...behind, to say the least, in arms technology. If we can try and convince some people with incentives to become designers and scientists working for the military as well as some extra funding, I'm sure we will get a modern and well equipped military."
[Effect] Millions of @@CURRENCY@@ are spent desperately trying to improve the military.

This is a standard response here, though it edges a little too close to the "perfect" answer - e.g. pump funds into R&D. Perhaps the general could note how massively expensive it would be to get the army up to speed with the rest of the world? Also do include some humour - perhaps something like The designer of the Mk1 @@ANIMAL@@ tank, affectionately nick-named The SpamCan by the army

The idea of this option was instead of having a direct focus on a particular part of warfare, they instead just focus on literally everything making progress not only slow, but inefficient, option three is meant to be on the opposite end of this spectrum. Though, I can see how you could think that with the way I wrote it, also, will probably think of a good nickname, probably something in the lines of dark humor.

Option 2. "Actually, its not as simple as that." Says @@RANDOMNAME@@, an ace pilot who served in last war. "Airpower is the way to the future, this was proven in the last war as me and my squad clearly proved that the canvas wings of our aircraft clearly where key to victory on the fronts we where on. Focusing on all of the military will take to long and will simply just leave us behind, but focusing our efforts on air power is simply what will make us soar above our enemy's!"
[Effect] The military still uses trenches while the airforce is working on jets and sky battleships.

Enemies, no need for a possessive apostrophe. Again, include some humour. Perhaps the ace pilot who served in the last war flew a bi-plane or hot air balloon? I like the humour present in the effect line here - try to replicate that when you're drawing up other effects.

The part where he says "Me and my squad clearly proved that the canvas wings of our aircraft" was meant to imply he flew a biplane, which, back then where made of wood and canvas. Regardless, I do know I could tack something on it to make it a bit more silly and funny.

Option 3. "I have to agree with the fly boy over there, just not with just air power." Says General @@RANDOMNAMEMALE@@ as he paces back and fourth. "I believe that we should instead focus our efforts on different things until they are up to scratch with the rest of the world, then focus on other stuff until that is up to date and so on, repeating the possess until we have everything modern and ready to fight any enemy's of @@NAME@@!"
[Effect] @@NAME@@ Is a real life example of schizo tech

How is this different from the first option? Surely the first option also calls for massively modernizing everything too?

As I stated in the first thing, its meant to be the other extreme, where you focus so extremely on one thing that other things get neglected, say, having ww1 dreadnought battleships while also having nuclear submarines. Again, I can however see how you could think its too similar. I'll again, try to think of something to fix it.

Option 4 "It's quite obvious what the issue is." Says Retired General @@RANDOMNAME@@ over the telegram. "This is a clear reason why we should stick to the old ways, if we add all this fancy new thingamajigs to our military, the men will become soft! I mean really, how can we call our men brave when they hide in those metal boxes you call Mark 1 @@ANIMAL@@'s! You would have to be a fool to listen to any of these people! Just leave things be and we will do fine without those fancy flying machines or metal boxes."
[Effect] The gun has given way to the sword

Okay, a decent option though I think you might be missing a trick here. This option could go full-on crazy. Effect line is... OK, but I'd suggest something that is easier understood as a consequence of the choice. Perhaps the breech-loading musket is considered cutting edge technology by the nation's armed forces (Needs some tidying up)

Could change the effect to say "The Gatling gun is considered cutting edge technology." instead, would make it have less of a negative hit to scientific advancement though.

Option 5 "I overheard everything and personally, I see this in a different way." says a odd looking man who climbed into your office uninvited. "Instead of researching new ways to kill people, why don't you spend that money on new ways for people to enjoy themselves, new ways to get around town, and so on. Heck we should just forget about all this war stuff and work on what really maters, the quality of life in @@NAME@@."
[Effect] Military designers have started designing buses and trams since the military was dismantled.

I think this could be funnier... I'll see if I can think of how.

Okay, thanks for that and everything else.

I'll probably make another draft in a few days.

[Annihilators of Chan Island]

(Image)

Hello and welcome to Got Issues! It's always nice to see a new writer!

This is brilliant for a first draft

Interesting premise here indeed, but I'm curious, are there any nations that actually have these problem and these primitive technologies? If so, then this would make a great issue!

As the 90th most primitive nation on NS (wait, only 90th?! I used to be at 46 before that hiatus!) I'd say yes, there are some pretty primitive nations out there.

[Effect] The military still uses trenches while the airforce is working on jets and sky battleships.

Even modern militaries still use trenches in some situations. Maybe have it as something ridiculous, like bolt-action rifles.

[Trotterdam]

Okay, a decent option though I think you might be missing a trick here. This option could go full-on crazy. Effect line is... OK, but I'd suggest something that is easier understood as a consequence of the choice. Perhaps the breech-loading musket is considered cutting edge technology by the nation's armed forces (Needs some tidying up)

Could change the effect to say "The Gatling gun is considered cutting edge technology." instead, would make it have less of a negative hit to scientific advancement though.

Nah, if you're going to be calling something cutting-edge technology, it should be something with an actual cutting edge, like a sword or bayonet.

[Chan Island]

Could change the effect to say "The Gatling gun is considered cutting edge technology." instead, would make it have less of a negative hit to scientific advancement though.

Nah, if you're going to be calling something cutting-edge technology, it should be something with an actual cutting edge, like a sword or bayonet.

I think bayonets are the perfect thing for this. Because other issues reference the fact that the nation's army has guns, but the idea of a bayonet is so old that it just seems common sense. In short- use bayonet.

[Vlanlados]

Draft 2 done.

[Caracasus]

OK then, some further thoughts.

1) effect line for option 1. Make it funnier. With effect lines, think about what the unintended consequences would be here. I can imagine one of the biggest consequences would be that your nation would possess state of the art weapons whilst whole areas of the country don't have electricity. Something like that.

2) effect line for option 2. To the best of my knowledge, soldiers today still use trenches. Replace it with muskets maybe? The issue is about technology not tactics.

3) Personally I feel that option 3 is redundant.

4) Merge option 4 and 5. The outcome is the same and frankly I think option 5 is the funnier of the two. I like the effect line for it. Links nicely to the option.

5) Option 6? I want to know more about this person. Make them a stronger character. As it is, you've got a typical "let's not fund the army at all" option of which there are many.

[Australian rePublic]

(Image)

Hello and welcome to Got Issues! It's always nice to see a new writer!

This is brilliant for a first draft

Interesting premise here indeed, but I'm curious, are there any nations that actually have these problem and these primitive technologies? If so, then this would make a great issue!

As the 90th most primitive nation on NS (wait, only 90th?! I used to be at 46 before that hiatus!) I'd say yes, there are some pretty primitive nations out there.

Oh no. I meant in real life