[SUBMITTED] A for Effort

[Orgrua]

Title: A for Effort

Description: After a home-schooled student with perfect grades flunked out of the nation's top school, @@CAPITAL@@ University, a group of people with have stormed your desk, each armed with their own two-sense.

Validity: All

Option: "This is not fair," complains @@RANDOMNAMEFEMALE@@, spitting on your papers while speaking. "My son did so well in high school. As his mom--er.. instructor, I think I'm qualified enough to say he certainly earned the grades that I gave him. So what if there's no verification that he actually earned those? @@LEADER@@, for the good of this @@TYPE@@, make it a law that colleges cannot kick a student out once they've enrolled!"

Effect: college standards are dropping almost as fast as the average graduate's IQ

Option: "This lady must not know what it means to run a top school," snaps @@RANDOMNAME@@, an admissions counselor at @@CAPITAL@@ University, as @@HE@@ pushes a giant stack of papers in front of you, knocking stuff off your desk. ""Do you see this stack of papers? Copies of rejection letters, sent to applicants who were declined a space because of this subpar student! I think that we need to take some serious measures to make sure that home-schooled students have their grades checked and verified by the state, and some extra funding can do just that!"

Effect: parents slip state workers extra money to guarantee approval of outrageously high grades

Option: "Why are we still using college applications, anyway," asks @@RANODMNAMEMALE@@, the CEO of A-Lotto-Wins. "Sales of our scratch-off-tickets are slowing, so why not compromise? Acceptance into prestigious universities is mostly by chance anyway, since most applicants are academically qualified. Students can avoid those pesky application fees if they buy a few of our College Edition Scratch-Offs™. @@LEADER@@, go ahead and toss a tax break our way, and watch the economy blossom!"

Effect: students do nothing during high school and save money to buy scratch-off tickets

Option: "I hope nobody is actually considering this train-wreck of a plan," says Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@, as @HE@@ irons @@HIS@@ lab-coat on one of your tables. "My team and I have come up with a brilliant way to measure someone's electrocognitive potential. Our patented process, which is called the ECP, is similar to an MRI, and it is much more reliable than an IQ test. While we haven't necessarily tested the process, I'm sure it's safe. If we require students to undergo this process to get their electrocognitive potential, I'm sure colleges will have their minds made up without needing to review thousands of boring applications."

Effect: students who get their electrocognitive potential measured wake up with a tail the next day

Option: "Why does the college process need to be so confusing," groans @@RANDOMNAMEFEMALE@@, a high school guidance counselor. "Trying to explain the whole process to high school students is a real headache. Why not just make going to college exactly like high school? There wouldn't be any home-schooling, which is a plus, and the college you go to can be determined by where you live, like the public high school system. High school grades won't matter either, since we should make a college education mandatory until the age of 24; students will surely appreciate their government funded master's degree."

Effect: factory workers are put on queues for next aerospace engineer

[Trotterdam]

Don't universities have entrance exams? I don't think you have to rely entirely on the parent's say-so for the student's grades.

[Barunia]

The effect for option 1 doesn't seem to make sense. If we are accepting home-schooled student marks at face value, then we believe that the kid has a university pass mark. The effect says that universities won't let him in. But if he has got the mark, the uni should let him in. The effect basically states the exact opposite of what a person choosing option 1 would expect to see.

Also a 5.0 GPA means nothing to me, probably because I'm not American. I'm assuming it's American. Perhaps change it to something more general, like "with a perfect admissions score."

Also, the correct macro would be @@CAPITAL@@' with two As.

[Australian rePublic]

It's always nice to see a new writer This is a brilliant premise for an issue, and I am surprised that it wasn't thought of sooner

But let's see,

1. Option 1- How would a parent have the right to decide whether or not a student's marks are adequate for university, isn't there some auditing process? If so, why is this contested

2. Option 2- Not all nations have school buses, some use public transport. Also, why limit to bus, why not trains, or any other form of transport

3. Option 3- Doesn't using standardised testing and curricular defeat the purpose of homeschooling in the first place?

4. Description- I have no knowledge of how education actually works, but would assume that every nation has a different GPA system (though there is an extremely high chance that I am wrong). I wouldn't recommend specifying numbers. Just say that it was very good marks

[Candlewhisper Archive]

If you're willing to take your time, I think we can get somewhere with this one.

Title: A for Effort

Description: After a news story surfaced about a home-schooled student's acceptance into the nation's top school, @@CAPITOL@@ University with a supposed 5.0 weighted GPA, questions are being tossed around regarding the legitimacy of his grades.

So let's start here.

In the upsides, this is a nice concise opening, with good writing and good English.

GPA is, as has been mentioned, very much an American abbreviation. The concept of grade point average exists in a lot of RL nations, but mostly in ones where you have multiple examinations being taken with a universal numerical scoring system. Contrast the UK, which uses lettered grades (A, B, C, etc.), or the French Baccalauréat, which has a system of streams and weighting, and you can see that your initial premise here may be too parochial.

As has been suggested, I think maybe do some research and change the phrasing so that it is more internationally applicable.

On a separate, point, note issue #668, How To Examine Your Testees, which was my self-edit recent issue. There's a high risk of sizeable overlap here, as my issue asks about different approaches to examinations and standardised testing, and as one option suggests home-schooling and avoiding universal standards altogether. Worth being aware of and reading that issue, to make sure you stay as distinct as possible.

[Australian rePublic]

If you're willing to take your time, I think we can get somewhere with this one.

Title: A for Effort

Description: After a news story surfaced about a home-schooled student's acceptance into the nation's top school, @@CAPITOL@@ University with a supposed 5.0 weighted GPA, questions are being tossed around regarding the legitimacy of his grades.

So let's start here.

In the upsides, this is a nice concise opening, with good writing and good English.

GPA is, as has been mentioned, very much an American abbreviation. The concept of grade point average exists in a lot of RL nations, but mostly in ones where you have multiple examinations being taken with a universal numerical scoring system. Contrast the UK, which uses lettered grades (A, B, C, etc.), or the French Baccalauréat, which has a system of streams and weighting, and you can see that your initial premise here may be too parochial.

As has been suggested, I think maybe do some research and change the phrasing so that it is more internationally applicable.

On a separate, point, note issue #668, How To Examine Your Testees, which was my self-edit recent issue. There's a high risk of sizeable overlap here, as my issue asks about different approaches to examinations and standardised testing, and as one option suggests home-schooling and avoiding universal standards altogether. Worth being aware of and reading that issue, to make sure you stay as distinct as possible.

Here in New South Wales, you need a percentage mark to get into university. That maybe a better system, because no matter what, a percent is ALWAYS out of 100. If someone gets 40%, it's easy to compare to someone who got 90%

[Orgrua]

The effect for option 1 doesn't seem to make sense. If we are accepting home-schooled student marks at face value, then we believe that the kid has a university pass mark. The effect says that universities won't let him in. But if he has got the mark, the uni should let him in. The effect basically states the exact opposite of what a person choosing option 1 would expect to see.

Also a 5.0 GPA means nothing to me, probably because I'm not American. I'm assuming it's American. Perhaps change it to something more general, like "with a perfect admissions score."

Also, the correct macro would be @@CAPITAL@@' with two As.

For the GPA thing, I'll change it to an average grade percentage. But for the result, I said universities don't accept them because they don't trust a home-schooled student's final report card done by their parents. They don't trust the grades and won't usually let them in. I'm fixing the other issues addressed not only in this reply but in others as well. Changes will be shown in blue.

[Orgrua]

It's always nice to see a new writer This is a brilliant premise for an issue, and I am surprised that it wasn't thought of sooner

But let's see,

1. Option 1- How would a parent have the right to decide whether or not a student's marks are adequate for university, isn't there some auditing process? If so, why is this contested

2. Option 2- Not all nations have school buses, some use public transport. Also, why limit to bus, why not trains, or any other form of transport

3. Option 3- Doesn't using standardised testing and curricular defeat the purpose of homeschooling in the first place?

4. Description- I have no knowledge of how education actually works, but would assume that every nation has a different GPA system (though there is an extremely high chance that I am wrong). I wouldn't recommend specifying numbers. Just say that it was very good marks

Thank you! You did bring up many good points that I will fix shortly, but here was my reasoning behind some of them.

Option 1-My premise was that the parent would be the one home-schooling the student

Option 2- good point, I'll change to "access to public transport" or something along those lines

Option 3- my premise was that this business comes out with a platform for people doing home-school. That platform would have verification because assessments are on there

All changes I make will be in blue, thank you for the advice in making this work!

[Orgrua]

If you're willing to take your time, I think we can get somewhere with this one.

Title: A for Effort

Description: After a news story surfaced about a home-schooled student's acceptance into the nation's top school, @@CAPITOL@@ University with a supposed 5.0 weighted GPA, questions are being tossed around regarding the legitimacy of his grades.

So let's start here.

In the upsides, this is a nice concise opening, with good writing and good English.

GPA is, as has been mentioned, very much an American abbreviation. The concept of grade point average exists in a lot of RL nations, but mostly in ones where you have multiple examinations being taken with a universal numerical scoring system. Contrast the UK, which uses lettered grades (A, B, C, etc.), or the French Baccalauréat, which has a system of streams and weighting, and you can see that your initial premise here may be too parochial.

As has been suggested, I think maybe do some research and change the phrasing so that it is more internationally applicable.

On a separate, point, note issue #668, How To Examine Your Testees, which was my self-edit recent issue. There's a high risk of sizeable overlap here, as my issue asks about different approaches to examinations and standardised testing, and as one option suggests home-schooling and avoiding universal standards altogether. Worth being aware of and reading that issue, to make sure you stay as distinct as possible.

Very good point. I'll try to move away from the idea of standardized testing and more towards grade validation for home-school students. Here in the US, we do use the letter system primarily; GPA is calculated based on that, so I'll be more vague and say something like "nearly perfect grades in every class" so it makes more sense. I'll make my changes to it in blue.

[Orgrua]

Don't universities have entrance exams? I don't think you have to rely entirely on the parent's say-so for the student's grades.

I thought that was if you actually got in, I may be wrong though.

[Orgrua]

I just made my first round of revisions! I would appreciate any and all critique on it!

[Abhichandra]

Option: "I think I've got the perfect solution for this situation," declares @@RANDOMNAME@@, CEO of Home-Skool Inc."With the new LearningLab 9000 platform, home-schooled students can now take all their classes online and prepackaged. Think about how much simpler things would be. Each student must enroll in six classes per year at only $200 each. There would be no need for standardized testing if all quizzes and tests are graded automatically and personally verified by our staff, for the low price of $149.97 per course verification. Just sign here, and we can roll the LearningLab 9000 into every home-school in @@NAME@@!

I would changed this to:

There would be no need for standardized testing if all quizzes and tests are graded automatically and personally verified by our staff, for the low price of 149.97 @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ per course verification. (Just because every nation has different currency)

[Orgrua]

Option: "I think I've got the perfect solution for this situation," declares @@RANDOMNAME@@, CEO of Home-Skool Inc."With the new LearningLab 9000 platform, home-schooled students can now take all their classes online and prepackaged. Think about how much simpler things would be. Each student must enroll in six classes per year at only $200 each. There would be no need for standardized testing if all quizzes and tests are graded automatically and personally verified by our staff, for the low price of $149.97 per course verification. Just sign here, and we can roll the LearningLab 9000 into every home-school in @@NAME@@!

I would changed this to:

There would be no need for standardized testing if all quizzes and tests are graded automatically and personally verified by our staff, for the low price of 149.97 @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ per course verification. (Just because every nation has different currency)

Good point, I changed it up top. How else could I improve this idea?

[Barunia]

The effect for option 1 doesn't seem to make sense. If we are accepting home-schooled student marks at face value, then we believe that the kid has a university pass mark. The effect says that universities won't let him in. But if he has got the mark, the uni should let him in. The effect basically states the exact opposite of what a person choosing option 1 would expect to see.

Also a 5.0 GPA means nothing to me, probably because I'm not American. I'm assuming it's American. Perhaps change it to something more general, like "with a perfect admissions score."

Also, the correct macro would be @@CAPITAL@@' with two As.

For the GPA thing, I'll change it to an average grade percentage. But for the result, I said universities don't accept them because they don't trust a home-schooled student's final report card done by their parents. They don't trust the grades and won't usually let them in. I'm fixing the other issues addressed not only in this reply but in others as well. Changes will be shown in blue.

I understand what you ate saying about not trusting the grade, but the problem is that the mother is arguing that the university should trust the grade. By choosing this issue, my government is choosing to side with the mother on this. In other words, we're effectiveley legislating that univesities have to accept a homeschool grade at face value. In that case, the effect line makes no sense.

[Orgrua]

For the GPA thing, I'll change it to an average grade percentage. But for the result, I said universities don't accept them because they don't trust a home-schooled student's final report card done by their parents. They don't trust the grades and won't usually let them in. I'm fixing the other issues addressed not only in this reply but in others as well. Changes will be shown in blue.

I understand what you are saying about not trusting the grade, but the problem is that the mother is arguing that the university should trust the grade. By choosing this issue, my government is choosing to side with the mother on this. In other words, we're effectiveley legislating that univesities have to accept a homeschool grade at face value. In that case, the effect line makes no sense.

Ah, now I see what you're saying. I changed it up above in blue. Do you think it's ready to submit, or is there more to fix?

[Orgrua]

Just checking before I submit, is this good enough to do so? If no response is received within 24 hours, I will submit the issue.

[Abhichandra]

Just checking before I submit, is this good enough to do so? If no response is received within 24 hours, I will submit the issue.

I´d say it is, however another minor edit:

at only $200 each.

should be changed to:

at only 200 @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ each.

[Orgrua]

Just checking before I submit, is this good enough to do so? If no response is received within 24 hours, I will submit the issue.

I´d say it is, however another minor edit:

at only $200 each.

should be changed to:

at only 200 @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@ each.

Ok, thank you so much. Will be submitting within a few minutes!

[Australian rePublic]

Good Luck!

[Candlewhisper Archive]

3 days is too fast. Not even got past the description yet, and a lot of people won't even have read it yet.

Set this thread back to draft, I think, and keep at it for a few weeks.

[Orgrua]

3 days is too fast. Not even got past the description yet, and a lot of people won't even have read it yet.

Set this thread back to draft, I think, and keep at it for a few weeks.

Is it too late if I submitted yesterday? Is there anything I can do for it?

[Candlewhisper Archive]

It's fine, I've deleted the submission. Just change this back to a draft thread, and resubmit it when its ready.

[Orgrua]

It's fine, I've deleted the submission. Just change this back to a draft thread, and resubmit it when its ready.

Thanks so much. It's back to draft. Now do I ask a question to get responses like that, or do I just bump it enough to maintain a spot on the first page and let it get responses?

[Drasnia]

Title: A for Effort

Description: After a news story surfaced about a home-schooled student's acceptance into the nation's top school, @@CAPITAL@@ University with supposedly near perfect grades in all classes, questions are being tossed around regarding the legitimacy of his grades.

But why was this suspicious? There needs to be an event that throws doubt on his grades, like him flunking his first term or something. Maybe he got a massive scholarship because of these supposedly false scores and so part of the issue is of academic and financial fraud.

Plenty of brilliant kids are homeschooled. There was a family that lived only a few miles from me who homeschooled all of their kids and 3 of them got perfect scores on the ACT (a college entrance exam here in the States). And mind you, this was in a rural farming community in the west, so there are bound to be plenty of examples similar to that one.

Validity: All

There may or may not be a flag for banning formal education, but that's an editorial call and not particularly important.

Option: "I don't understand why my son can't do well in school without being called a liar for it," shouts @@RANDOMNAMEFEMALE@@, the home-schooling mother of @@RANDOMNAMEMALE@@, a future student at @@CAPITAL@@ University. "My son has worked extremely hard throughout these past four years. I gave him the grades I think he deserved; the idea of me not doing as such is absurd. His admittance to such a prestigious university is enough proof of his excellence, so I think the government should ban all entrance exams for colleges; he already proved himself.

Effect: Regular high school students try to bribe their teachers for extra points, in order to keep up with the the grades of home-schooling students.

Stats: Increases: Authoritarianism, Charmlessness, Corruption, Government Size, Industry: Arms Manufacturing, Industry: Automobile Manufacturing, Industry: Basket Weaving, Industry: Pizza Delivery, Obesity, Recreational Drug Use, Wealth Gaps, Youth Rebelliousness; Decreases: Economy, Average Income, Ignorance, Industry: Book Publishing, Industry: Information Technology, Public Education, Scientific Advancement, Tourism

Again, I don't get why people doubt this one kid without any reason for it.

Option: "You'd have better luck having Pinocchio try to convince me of those grades," disagrees @@RANDOMNAME@@, Superintendent of @@CAPITAL@@ Secondary Schools. "If this student has no disabilities and resides in a house that has access to several major modes of public transportation, there is no reason why he should even be able to be home-schooled. This great country offers free education through high school, and it makes no sense to continue to allow home-schooling. I say we ban it for the greater good of @@NAME@@!"

Effect: Socially awkward children used to a home environment don't fit in their giant classes.

Stats: Increases: Authoritarianism, Government Size, Public Education, Public Transport, Scientific Advancement, Social Conservatism, Taxation; Decreases: Averageness, Cheerfulness, Freedom from Taxation, Inclusiveness, Obesity

This is a better option idea. It'd be interesting if you banned homeschooling, though as it stands the case isn't very compelling. Once again, there needs to be that event that makes it seem like there's some sort of fraud or something going. The line about free school I think will prove to be a validity problem.

Option: "I think I've got the perfect solution for this situation," declares @@RANDOMNAME@@, CEO of Home-Skool Inc. "With the new LearningLab 9000 platform, home-schooled students can now take all their classes online and prepackaged. Each student must enroll in six classes per year at just 200 @@CURRENCYPLIRAL@@ each. There would be no debate about validity, since all assessments are graded automatically and personally verified by our staff, for the low price of 149.97 @@CURRENCYPLURAL@@, per course verification. Just sign here, and we can roll the LearningLab 9000 into every home-school in @@NAME@@!

Effect: Only the parents who can afford the LearningLab 9000 can secure a high school education for their children.

Stats: Increases: Average Income of Rich, Business Subsidization, Economic Output, Industry: Information Technology, Public Education, Recreational Drug Use, Taxation; Decreases: Averageness, Economic Freedom, Public Transport, Social Conservatism

Not a fan of hard-coded costs. It'd be funnier if this guy spoke like "For just a nominal fee™, you can purchase our LearningLab9000©" and "declares @@RANDOMNAME@@, CEO of Home-Skool Inc.©®℠™"

[Candlewhisper Archive]

I think hard coded costs are fine.

BTW, you may not be doing yourself any favours by taking up too much submission text with stat effects. The game engine doesn't work in that we pick those stats and click an up or down slider on it. Rather, the [stats] line is either best left blank, or used for narrative clarifications / communication of authorial intent.

It's very, very rare that the line has any meaningful information of use to editors, and often it makes a submission unwieldy and hard to read, so focus on the narrative instead.