[info] The government has recently utilized its policy on eminent domain to repossess the property of noctorious grifter and pug trafficker, Hal "8-Ball" Mystery, located in the scenic, countryside town of @@ANIMAL@@ Falls. After a search of the property, investigators found a mysterious and active machine in the shape of a triangle, which was apparently constructed by Hal, and evidence of a massive counterfeiting operation implicating him. It is up to you to decide the next course of action.
[validity] must allow eminent domain, have high scientific advancement and high crime
[option] "Whatever you do, don't turn off that machine!" pleads Hal, trying but failing to look remorseful, while being led away in handcuffs. "I know that I've done some bad things before, but I've only got the best of intentions with that device! I believe that it can increase the intelligence of anyone in it's vicinity. Just leave it alone and don't touch it. You've got to trust me!"
[effect] villagers in @@ANIMAL@@ Falls complain that they are hearing voices that are not there
[stats] health decreases slightly, ideological radicality increases slightly, recreational drug use decreases slightly
[option] "That machine Hal built is really impressive." gushes Professor @@RANDOMFIRSTNAME@@ Mcsocket, a Material Scientist, turning on a personal computer and showing you some pictures of the big dumb object. "It appears to be made up of some kind of new synthetic material. If you give me permission, I can shut the machine down, transport it to the laboratory and safely conduct tests on it. Through reverse-engineering, we could save years of research and funding! So what do you say?"
[effect] a criminal mastermind is known for playing a big hand in the material sciences
[stats] scientific advancement increases, information technology industry expands, crime increases slightly
[option] "That seems like a real waste of this here machine!" snaps Military Engineer @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@, nicknamed 'Napolean' for her short height and equally short temper. "Ol'e Hal was correct, it can indeed alter the minds of nearby people, but ay found that it harms brains instead of helping them. If we, say, make a scaled up version of this, ayn' maybe run a couple av' terawatts av' electricity through it, ay postulate that it could be used ta fry the minds of our enemies. All we need is Hal out av jail ta help us ta build our prototype!"
[effect] @@NAME@@'s new 'powerful' weapon causes mild headaches and auditory hallucinations
[stats] crime increases, defensive forces grow, defense funding increases, arms manufacturing industry expands, scientific advancement increases, pacifism decreases
[option] "Uncle Hal is innocent!" insists Maple "Shooting Star" Mystery, his niece, bursting into your office. "Sure, he might shoplift the occasional grapefruit, but he's not a currency counterfeiter! Someone must have planted the 'evidence' to get him into trouble. It's his triangle, and it's his house! The government has no business stealing the property of honest, hard-working citizens. Put an end to this practise and leave our family alone!"
[effect] government projects grind to a halt as eminent domain powers have all but gone overnight
[stats] educational funding decreases, healthcare funding decreases, industry funding increases, economic freedom increases, crime increases, black market activity rises, corruption drops, government size falls
Inspired entirely by Gravity Falls episode "Not What He Seems".
1st person is an expy of Stan Pines.
2nd person is an expy of Hadron Mcgucket.
3rd person is an expy of Lil ol'e Gideon.
4th person is an expy of Mabel Pines.
