[ACCEPTED] A Sticky Situation

[Noahs Second Country]

Issue is done, except for one thing:

"Every time I go on a run I always [Please fill this space!] " screeches @@RANDOMNAMEFEMALE@@

Good job on getting through with your issue well!
(Now regressing into regular forum chatter)

[title]Please Remain Seated

[desc]Whilst browsing the @@NAME@@ Catalogue, you stumble upon a dreaded rear-end placement utensil, otherwise known as a "chair". Startled, and terrified beyond belief, you screech for the assistance of your advisers.

[validity]Only Australian Republic can receive this issue.

[option]"@@LEADER@@, I am so sorry that you had to see this horrifying object," gasps your secretary, while she tightens her grip on her comforting teddy bear. "We need to get you as far away from those things as possible. I have a safe place 27,560 kilometres away - that's 16,000 miles - and I believe it should do the trick."
[effect]@@LEADER@@ claims to perpetually stand for the good of the people

[option]"I don't see what all the fuss is about," muses your Minister of Silly Lacks of Walking. "We need to get this fear of chairs that you have been cursed by seen to; perhaps even turned into a weapon. Trivial things such as this should not distract you from the fact that in 1998, The Undertaker threw Mankind off Hell In A Cell, and plummeted 16 ft through an announcer's table."
[effect]@@LEADER@@ brandishes steel chairs to threaten foreign dignitaries

[option]"The end times have come!" cries an anonymous woman covered in wood shavings. "We must destroy these accursed idols, and embrace the one true deity; the Bed!"
[effect]board congegrations have been plagued by executives falling asleep in their meeting beds

I swear, you need to make this a real thing!

[Dytarma]

I have a feeling, somewhere in the depths of the Got Issues? forum, there will be an issue about banning chairs.

[Dytarma]

So, any other suggestions?

[Noahs Second Country]

[Option]"Now hold on here, we don't need to ban gum, but there is a problem." Says parents @@RANDOMNAME@@ and @@RANDOMNAME@@, as they scold their son as he didn't throw his gum in the right place. "What we suggest is that you could have trashcans on every street in @@NAME@@, so that no matter where you go, you see a trashcan to throw away your gum. It'll be smelly, sure, but it's worth it!" The mother soon adds on. "And have perfume next to them so they aren't so smelly?"
[Effect]trashcans are the nicest smelling thing in @@NAME@@.

Should be @@RANDOMMALENAME@@ and @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@. Also, this is hard to read, TBH

[Dytarma]

[Option]"Now hold on here, we don't need to ban gum, but there is a problem." Says parents @@RANDOMNAME@@ and @@RANDOMNAME@@, as they scold their son as he didn't throw his gum in the right place. "What we suggest is that you could have trashcans on every street in @@NAME@@, so that no matter where you go, you see a trashcan to throw away your gum. It'll be smelly, sure, but it's worth it!" The mother soon adds on. "And have perfume next to them so they aren't so smelly?"
[Effect]trashcans are the nicest smelling thing in @@NAME@@.

Should be @@RANDOMMALENAME@@ and @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@. Also, this is hard to read, TBH

Added, but what part sound hard to read?

[Noahs Second Country]

Should be @@RANDOMMALENAME@@ and @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@. Also, this is hard to read, TBH

Added, but what part sound hard to read?

The entire option.

[Dytarma]

Added, but what part sound hard to read?

The entire option.

Hm, I guess I'll have to reword it.

[Ransium]

Should be @@RANDOMMALENAME@@ and @@RANDOMFEMALENAME@@. Also, this is hard to read, TBH

Added, but what part sound hard to read?

Cut having both parents and just make it one. Eliminate the "The mother soon adds on." Again, you want to avoid dialogue interuptions unless there is a super compelling reason. I think try to restructure a bit so fewer commas are needed, the amount of interruptions and asides make the dialogue to be jerky and a bit hard to follow overall.

[Dytarma]

Added, but what part sound hard to read?

Cut having both parents and just make it one. Eliminate the "The mother soon adds on." Again, you want to avoid dialogue interuptions unless there is a super compelling reason. I think try to restructure a bit so fewer commas are needed, the amount of interruptions and asides make the dialogue to be jerky and a bit hard to follow overall.

Aight, I fixed it up. Is it still hard to read?

[Drayxaso]

Give it a week and I bet someone will submit a draft about banning chairs.

[title]Please Remain Seated

[desc]Whilst browsing the @@NAME@@ Catalogue, you stumble upon a dreaded rear-end placement utensil, otherwise known as a "chair". Startled, and terrified beyond belief, you screech for the assistance of your advisers.

[validity]Only Australian Republic can receive this issue.

[option]"@@LEADER@@, I am so sorry that you had to see this horrifying object," gasps your secretary, while she tightens her grip on her comforting teddy bear. "We need to get you as far away from those things as possible. I have a safe place 27,560 kilometres away - that's 16,000 miles - and I believe it should do the trick."
[effect]@@LEADER@@ claims to perpetually stand for the good of the people

[option]"I don't see what all the fuss is about," muses your Minister of Silly Lacks of Walking. "We need to get this fear of chairs that you have been cursed by seen to; perhaps even turned into a weapon. Trivial things such as this should not distract you from the fact that in 1998, The Undertaker threw Mankind off Hell In A Cell, and plummeted 16 ft through an announcer's table."
[effect]@@LEADER@@ brandishes steel chairs to threaten foreign dignitaries

[option]"The end times have come!" cries an anonymous woman covered in wood shavings. "We must destroy these accursed idols, and embrace the one true deity; the Bed!"
[effect]board congegrations have been plagued by executives falling asleep in their meeting beds

You need to actually do this. It would be glorious.
It's not like there isn't a precedent: there's that Pony issue only the staff can receive.

[Dytarma]

I'm thinking I should make it as a joke draft, because I really don't care whether or not it's accepted.

[Drayxaso]

I'm thinking I should make it as a joke draft, because I really don't care whether or not it's accepted.

What? Helaw's chair-draft? I know its a joke, but you'd still have to at least credit him as co-author, I think.

[Dytarma]

I'm thinking I should make it as a joke draft, because I really don't care whether or not it's accepted.

What? Helaw's chair-draft? I know its a joke, but you'd still have to at least credit him as co-author, I think.

Yeah, I know. I'm not a stealing type of guy. But then again, I did nothing to that issue.

[Volitopia]

Think you can submit this in a few days if no one else has any recommendations.

[Dytarma]

Think you can submit this in a few days if no one else has any recommendations.

Alright, but I either wait about 4 days or wait for 3 people to tell me to submit the draft, whichever comes first. So since what you are sorta saying is I can submit (I hope), so that will leave me with two other people to count upon.

[Volitopia]

... either wait about 4 days or wait for 3 people to tell me to submit the draft, whichever comes first...

Two more days, as the clock ticks by...

[Dytarma]

... either wait about 4 days or wait for 3 people to tell me to submit the draft, whichever comes first...

Two more days, as the clock ticks by...

Yes, the clock to doomsday...

[Dytarma]

Tick tick...

[Volitopia]

Tick tick...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zHIVeWhCMU8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L21br2DSCSg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZoH8E9MlB7s
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dQw4w9WgXcQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NVTPGBLyU5I
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cokwoi5GPyQ

[Dytarma]

I checked through all of those. Even the middle one.

[Volitopia]

I checked through all of those. Even the middle one.

Hah! I'm fairly certain you were expecting it though.
Still good to get in a laugh every month or so from that.

[Dytarma]

I checked through all of those. Even the middle one.

Hah! I'm fairly certain you were expecting it though.
Still good to get in a laugh every month or so from that.

Yeah, I was. I just told myself, "Something tells me..." Then I saw it.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

Submit it, looks good to me.

[Dytarma]

Alright, but I'll still wait for one person.

[Candlewhisper Archive]

Sure up to you, though generally if an editor says they'd like to see it submitted, that's a pretty good sign it'll get accepted...